Night Maneuvers

by Jillian Burns

  Alex took them to the Venetian and nothing more was said about McCabe. The food was world-class, and afterward, she talked them into taking the gondola ride down the canal that ran inside the hotel.

  As she waved them off at the airport the next morning, she promised to see them at Thanksgiving, and calculated that was only a little over a month away.

  Wouldn’t it have been the best Thanksgiving ever if she could’ve brought Mitch home with her? Maybe even been able to introduce him as her fiancé?

  Hell, she’d have settled for boyfriend.

  Who was she kidding? Right now, she’d give anything just to call him friend again.

  17

  SITUATION REPORT: Well, I’m not saving a $70 million plane, but…

  Mitch had once heard of an unbelievable feat pulled off by a U.S. Navy pilot flying an F-35 joint strike force fighter.

  This navy pilot had been lifting off from an aircraft carrier when his vertical thruster fired while he was still vectored for vertical takeoff. The plane headed nose-down, a hundred feet off the deck of the carrier. The aircraft should’ve crashed. Instead, the pilot performed a perfect vertical loop and then took off. Talk about stability control…

  If Mitch hadn’t seen video footage, he might have thought the whole story was merely urban legend. It seemed unbelievable that any fighter pilot would’ve had the kind of balls it would take to stay calm and get that F-35 to remain stable. So many things could’ve gone wrong. He was flying through his own afterburner. His wings had to remain perfectly level.

  Sunday night Mitch lay in bed in his apartment, wide-awake, his hands clasped behind his head, and thought about that pilot. He came to the conclusion that if that guy could get himself out of that kind of snafu, then Mitch should be able to get himself out of the mess his life had become.

  He’d left the MGM Grand shaken, Neil’s words pounding in his brain. “You have everything I want and you don’t even know it.”

  As if Mitch had been struck by a lightning bolt, everything he’d thought about his life had turned upside down at that moment, just like that F-35. And if he didn’t want to crash and burn, he needed to execute a perfect vertical roll and get his life back in the air and flying right.

  A part of him knew deep down that Alex had been telling the truth about her kiss with Neil. He hadn’t really needed Neil’s word to prove Alex’s loyalty. But if he had acknowledged her truth the other night, that she loved him, he would have had to open his heart to trusting her. Like Jackson said, take a chance on someone.

  Before he’d seen Alex kissing Neil, he’d been more happy, more—yeah, he needed to admit it—in love than he’d ever been with Luanne. But he might never have recognized it. He’d have gone through life—for as long as it lasted—thinking he could have Alex’s love and still keep his heart safely inside the bunker he’d built around it.

  Loving someone, trusting them, scared the hell out of him. It meant opening himself up to pain. He’d been there, done that and barely survived it. But the reason he’d survived it was…Alex. How blind had he been not to see she’d always been there for him? Twelve damn years she’d been there. Always standing beside him, watching his back, giving him her unconditional friendship. Her understanding. Her…love. She’d been his wingman, his buddy, his…everything.

  He’d had the most wonderful gift all this time and never appreciated her. All these wasted years. Years of sleeping around, pretending he was the smart one, keeping women at a distance, using them for pleasure to get back at—what? His mom? Or a young girl who’d married too young to know what she wanted? What a jackass he’d been.

  And Alex, wasting her time on a jerk like him.

  Now it might be too late to get her back.

  But he sure as hell intended to try.

  Alex hadn’t given up on him. He wasn’t going to give up on her anytime soon.

  THE WEEK AFTER her parents left seemed to pass by under a dark, heavy cloud of gloom for Alex. And, as if the weather wished to match her mood, it stayed dark and stormy all week, as well. Some nights it’d been too dangerous to fly, and Alex knew her students felt the same skin-crawling cabin fever she did at being cooped up in the classroom all night.

  The weekend finally came and Jordan and Lily ambushed her Friday for a girls’ night out. She knew they were trying to cheer her up, and she appreciated their effort, but…

  Note to self: Jell-O shooters and broken hearts don’t mix. Turns out she was a mean drunk. Ugh. She was totally embarrassing. Luckily, her two new friends had ignored her bad temper and self-pity party.

  She spent the rest of the weekend in bed with the sniffles and actually called in sick Sunday night. By Wednesday she was forced to admit she needed a doctor and some antibiotics. The good thing about being sick was having an excuse for puffy eyes and a red nose. Someone else had to teach her class, but other than feeling guilty about that, being a contagious recluse suited her just fine.

  She didn’t seem to have the energy to care whether she ever left her house again. And she wasn’t in the mood for visitors, either. This meant she might have left some well-meaning friends with the false belief that her house was full of infectious germs.

  After another weekend in bed, even she couldn’t stand herself. She’d milked the flu for all she could and it was time for her to cowboy up—as her grandfather would say—and face the world. A world without Mitch.

  She shouldn’t miss the clueless jerk.

  But she did.

  She missed being able to rant to him about her bad day. Or brag to him about her good day. She missed his smile, and his wicked humor. His optimism every day. Always finding some way to make life fun. She missed his kisses and his arms around her at night. Those exquisite moments of connection when he slid inside her and, for a little while at least, they seemed like one person. And she missed those moments of silence when she could look into his eyes and know that he knew exactly what she was thinking.

  So, Monday night at the end of her shift, her mind had totally wandered off to thinking of all those things she missed about Mitch, wretched as that was. Leaning back in her chair, staring at the ceiling, she had her hands behind her head and her feet propped on her desk, completely oblivious to the emails and reports in front of her.

  At the knock on her open door she dropped her feet to the floor and scooted her chair up to her desk.

  Grady came in, looking almost as tired as Alex did. “Hughes, I’m heading out. You coming?”

  “Doesn’t Lily work days at her shop? Why do you look like death warmed up?”

  He shrugged. “Just not a day sleeper.”

  “Blackout curtains help.”

  “Sounds crazy, but I just don’t sleep as well if Lily’s not there.”

  Alex tried to swallow past the huge lump in her throat. “No. It doesn’t sound crazy.”

  Grady stared at her a second or two, and then gave her a brief nod. “Good night, Major Hughes.”

  “Good night, sir.”

  Over the past couple of weeks, she’d lain awake during the day, or been walking out to her car in the early morning hours, and wanted so badly to call Mitch. To see how he was doing, see if they could try to make it work just one more time, or just to hear his voice.

  So far, she’d resisted. But in these dark hours just before dawn, when she was tired from working all night, her resistance was lowest. She yanked the paperwork toward her and tried to concentrate on performance reviews and grading classroom tests.

  The later she worked the more quiet the building grew. She stuck in her ear buds and flipped on her iPod. Ugh! Why had she bought all these depressing songs about unrequited love? She flipped it off again and shoved to her feet. This was ridiculous. She could take this paperwork home and finish it there while she watched the DIY network.

  Collecting her things, she grabbed her hat and headed out, locking her door behind her. Not that she had to worry about Mitch’s practical jokes anymore— Stop it, Alex!

 
; She had to stop thinking about him all the time.

  Out in the parking lot she drew in a deep breath and noticed the sun creeping up over the mountains, turning the sky pink and orange.

  Feeling a bit better, she slid into her Mustang, dropping her briefcase in the passenger seat, stuck her keys in the ignition and turned.

  The only sound she heard was a click. She knew better, but she still turned the key again. Yep, same result, knucklehead.

  Man, she so did not need this right now. She was tired and cranky and hungry and all she wanted was breakfast and a bath. With a loud, self-pitying sigh, she climbed out, pulled the lever under the grill, and opened the hood.

  She stared a moment, disbelieving her eyes. What the… How could a distributor cap just disappear?

  “Looking for this?”

  She jumped at the sound of Mitch’s voice and peeked around the hood. He stood beside her driver’s door holding a black distributor cap. Or more correctly, her distributor cap.

  She blinked at him, uncomprehending at first. He’d removed her distributor cap? Why would he—

  How could he—! He thought some stupid practical joke would make things right between them? Outwardly she bristled. But inside, her heart was melting at the sight of him. He looked like hell. He looked wonderful.

  “What is this, McCabe?”

  “Take it easy, Hughes.” He stepped closer, but haltingly, like a cowboy gentling a wild pony. “I just wanted to talk.” He gave her a sheepish grin and shrugged one shoulder. “Figured I’d make sure you couldn’t get away.”

  She briefly closed her eyes and prayed for strength. Strength to resist running to him and wrapping her arms around him and begging him to kiss her. “All right.” She folded her arms. “Talk.”

  He took another step closer and the breeze brought the scent of Mitch to her nose. She inhaled and felt a pang of desire burn through her.

  “I remember the first time I saw you. We’d just entered the academy, and you were walking off the field alone after the swearing-in ceremony.”

  She frowned. “You saw me then?”

  He nodded. “I remember thinking, hey, I’m not the only one that doesn’t have family here. I’m not alone. So, I followed you.”

  “You did?”

  “When I saw those creeps jump you, I wished to God I had a tire iron.”

  “You saw them?”

  He nodded. “Didn’t you ever wonder how I happened to be in that hallway?”

  She shook her head. “I guess I was so shaken I didn’t question it.”

  “You were shaken?”

  “Scared to death.”

  “Well, you didn’t show it. When I realized you’d taken down that upperclassman with your hands taped behind you, I couldn’t believe it. And after, you were so tough, so determined to be treated equally.” He ran a finger down her nose. “You never would let me protect you, or help you. I’ve always admired that.”

  Mitch’s face swam before her. As if in a dream, the world slowed and brightened. A ray of sunshine escaped the shadow of the mountains and lit his blond hair in golden light. Her throat closed up.

  He took another step and brought his fingers up to tuck back a strand of hair that had blown across her face. “Yet every time I lost faith in myself, you believed in me. You saw that better person in me even when I couldn’t see it myself. I think I’ve probably loved you from the very beginning, Alex.”

  She tried to swallow, but she still couldn’t speak.

  “I love you, Alexandria Hughes.”

  She searched his eyes. Those baby-blue eyes that had smiled at her, laughed with her, beguiled her for twelve years. Then she looked at his mouth. Those masculine lips that had saved her, whispered both truth and lies to her. Lips that had hurt her and kissed her. “Say it again,” she whispered.

  He flashed a quick grin and then his expression turned serious again. “I love you, Alex. I love your stubborn streak and your horrible temper, and your sweet mouth and your deadly intelligence.”

  She punched his arm.

  “Ow.” He faked an expression of pain and rubbed his arm.

  “It’s about time, you idiot.” She finally let the tears flow, even as she laughed.

  Mitch smiled and gathered her into his arms and held her tight as if he never wanted to let her go. He caressed her back and laid his cheek atop her head.

  She wrapped her arms around his waist and buried her nose in his chest. It felt so good to be in his arms again. To let herself be needy, after so many years of believing she couldn’t show any sign of weakness.

  He gathered her hair away from her wet face, and pressed kisses on the top of her head and her temple. “I’m so sorry I hurt you, baby.” Bringing both hands up to cup her face, he lifted it to him. He bent and tenderly kissed her trembling lips. When he raised his head, he smiled at her. “Thank you for loving me all these years. For believing in me, even when I didn’t believe in myself.”

  “It’s always been you, Mitch. Always.” She threw her arms around his neck and took his mouth with hers, luscious and long, happy and smiling, and never letting go.

  Epilogue

  Nellis Air Force Base Chapel

  HER MOTHER-WAS weeping. Again.

  “Mom, you’re ruining your makeup.” Alex grabbed a tissue from the dressing table and handed it to her mother.

  “I know, honey, but I just can’t help it. You’re so beautiful.”

  Alex stood in front of the full-length mirror for a more realistic appraisal. She rubbed her scalp where the pins holding the small tiara and veil were digging mercilessly. The veil was attached to her hair so well, she could probably travel at the speed of sound right now and it wouldn’t come off.

  And the dress?

  The ruched bodice had a halter neckline, which was okay, but the straps dug into the skin under her arms and the tulle under her full skirt was itchy. And don’t even get her started about the freakin’ long train. On someone else, it would be beautiful, she was sure. But she just knew she was going to trip and fall flat on her face.

  She adjusted the waist one more time and scratched under her arm again.

  “Will you stop twitching?” Jordan stepped close and smoothed down the skirt. “You look gorgeous.”

  “I just hate this.” She stomped away and paced the distance to the end of the bridal ready room.

  “Alex,” Lily said. “Take a deep breath, close your eyes, and visualize—oh!” Her hand flew to her rounded belly. “She’s kicking like a high-stepper in a marching band.” She grabbed Jordan’s hand and placed it on her protruding stomach. “Here. Feel that?”

  Jordan’s eyes widened. “Oh, Lily. It’s a wonder you aren’t black-and-blue.”

  Both of them turned to Alex. “Do you want to feel?” Lily asked.

  “I, uh.” Alex swallowed. “Nothing personal, y’all, but I think I’m going to throw up.” She rubbed her chest where a cluster of nerves had taken up residence and were inviting the rest of the neighborhood for a party.

  Her mom grabbed the bowl of mints off the coffee table, dumped them out and handed her the bowl. “Here, honey.”

  “Uh, thanks, Mom.”

  “Come here.” Jordan led her to the sofa and sat down beside her. “What’s wrong?”

  Alex blinked back a stinging in her eyes. Her hands were shaking. “Mitch has done this before and been hurt. What if he…changes his mind?”

  “Oh, honey.” Her mom came to sit in a club chair kitty-corner to the sofa and patted her hand.

  “What if he decides he doesn’t want to take a chance on us? What if—”

  “Alex, I’ll tell you what,” Jordan said. “When you start to walk down the aisle, and you first see Mitch, you look in his eyes. And if you still doubt his love for you, you just turn around and run out of the chapel and I will personally explain to Mitch and everyone, okay?”

  Alex stared into Jordan’s confident face. Jordan had been there, done that. She’d walked down that aisle and
seen the look in Jackson’s eyes. Alex remembered that look. Had been downright envious of it at the time. If Mitch looked at her that way…

  She nodded. “It’s a deal.” Then she smiled. This was her freakin’ wedding day!

  There was a harsh knock on the door and Lily went to answer it.

  Jackson peeked his head around the door frame. “Uh, ladies, Major McCabe would like a Sit Rep?”

  “Tell him we’re ready to begin,” Alex called to him as she stood and smoothed down the elegant skirt of her stunning wedding gown. She was ready. After twelve years. It still seemed a bit surreal. But she’d wanted Mitch for so long now, to know they would finally be together. That he wanted her. Loved her. He’d even requested reassignment to a desk job so they could be married and she could still fly with her squadron.

  He’d always supported her ambitions, her right to be treated equally. That’s why she’d gone behind his back and requested the desk job for herself. She loved flying, but she’d been there, done that. She didn’t have anything else to prove. And besides, she also loved the idea of having a kid or two with Mitch.

  She couldn’t wait to tell him tonight. In bed.

  Jordan gathered up the record-long train, and Lily took Alex’s mother’s hand. They exited the bridal room, made it down the hall and turned the corner, and then it was all really happening.

  Alex could hear the string quartet playing the wedding march when the door opened for her mother to go through, then Lily, then Jordan. And then it was her turn.

  She stepped through the door and saw her father in an elegant black tux waiting with his elbow extended, and slipped her arm through his. He was blinking a lot and his jaw was tight, but he held his shoulders back and his chin up.

  As she made her way down the aisle, she saw all three of her brothers standing in the front two rows with their wives and kids, and behind them sat aunts and uncles and cousins. The rest of the pews on both sides of the aisle were taken up with friends and colleagues.

  Lieutenant Colonel Ethan Grady, her squadron commander, her friend and mentor, stood as grooms-man, tall and rock-steady in his uniform. He’d been a steadfast presence in her life ever since she’d come to Nellis. A man of integrity and resolution.