Bear to Love: Kodiak Den #3 (Alaskan Den Men Book 8)

by Amy Lamont

  Bear to Love

  Kodiak Den #3

  Amy Lamont

  Productive Ink Media

  Contents

  Chapter 1

  Chapter 2

  Chapter 3

  Chapter 4

  Chapter 5

  Chapter 6

  Chapter 7

  Chapter 8

  Chapter 9

  Chapter 10

  Chapter 11

  Chapter 12

  Chapter 13

  Chapter 14

  Epilogue

  A Note From Amy

  Copyright © 2017 by Amy Lamont

  All rights reserved.

  No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means, including information storage and retrieval systems, without written permission from the author, except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.

  Chapter 1

  Macy

  I sank down onto the worn, plaid chair across from my soon-to-be sister-in-law, careful not to spill my wine as I went. “If my family toasts you one more time, I’m going to need a designated driver.”

  Alyssa raised an eyebrow and nodded toward my glass. “You mean that isn’t grape juice?”

  I examined my glass and then took a sip before giving it another long, considering look. I shot a grin at Alyssa. “Nope. That’s the good stuff.”

  “I’m shocked,” she said dryly. “Your family seems to think you stopped aging sometime around the time you turned twelve. I thought for sure one of them would swoop down and snatch your glass from your hand before a drop of alcohol could touch your lips.”

  I clutched my wine glass closer to my chest and shot her a hard glare. “Never! It would be my cold, dead hand they’d have to peel it from.”

  The two of us fell into a fit of giggles. Not for the first time, it hit me how happy I was to have this new addition to the den. Not that Kaden had changed Alyssa yet. She was still human. But as his mate, she was as much part of the family as any of the Kodiak shifters.

  And she was one of the few people in my family—scratch that, maybe the only member of my family—who saw the real me.

  “I’m glad you can laugh about it,” she said when our giggles died down. “I think if I were you, I’d have strangled all my brothers by now.”

  I shrugged. “They’ve been this way my whole life…”

  Before I could finish my thought, Kaden sank down next to Alyssa, throwing an arm around her shoulders and pulling her in close to his side.

  I hid my smile in my wine glass. Kaden’s inability to keep his hands off his mate had become a running joke in the family. All shifters tended toward possessive with their mates, but Kaden took it to a whole new level.

  “What are you two talking about?” he asked.

  “The way you all treat Macy.” Alyssa snuggled into him, just as bad as Kaden when it came to the need for constant contact.

  Before he could answer, my phone beeped with an incoming text message. I fished it out of the pocket of my jeans—again careful not to lose so much as a drop of my wine—and swiped my thumb over the face.

  “Everyone you know is here, Macy. Who on earth could be texting you?”

  I looked up from the message from one of my bandmates to stare daggers at Kaden. “It’s one of my many lovers. He wants to know if I’m available for a booty call tonight.”

  Kaden’s face hardened. “You better be kidding.”

  Alyssa poked him hard in the side. “That! That’s what we were talking about. Your sister is a grown woman. She’s entitled to her privacy. You don’t get to ask her about whoever is texting her, let alone lecture her on her sex life.”

  I couldn’t quite fight my smirk at Kaden’s horrified expression at the mention of my sex life. Then he glanced down at Alyssa and his face instantly softened. My own insides turned to a puddle of goo at the sight of my big, bad mercenary of a brother totally melting at the sight of his mate.

  “Sweetheart, Macy hasn’t had to take care of herself the way you have.”

  The look on my brother’s face as he explained things to Alyssa almost stole my breath away. He was so obviously proud of how she’d made her own way in the world since she was seventeen. The mixture of admiration, love, and tenderness in his eyes squeezed at my heart.

  “We just want to make sure she doesn’t get hurt. She hasn’t had to learn that not everyone is as sweet and innocent as she is,” he said.

  As if to give proof to his words, Aunt Nola’s grumpy old cat slinked his way onto my lap, purring the moment I stroked my hand down his back and kneading his claws into my jean-clad leg. That cat hated everyone on principle. Everyone except me. For me he turned from a hissy, spitty, feral tomcat into a sweet-as-pie kitten seeking affection. I seemed to have that effect on most animals I encountered.

  I held back a sigh. All I needed now were a few cartoon bluebirds to circle my head and a unicorn to emerge from the woods to offer me a ride and my brother’s picture of me as some innocent Disney princess that needed to be coddled and protected would be solidified.

  Alyssa snorted, shaking her head at me. She’d caught me on more than one occasion over the years sneaking out of town to play with my band. More recently, I’d even stashed my guitar in her apartment.

  I blinked at her, eyes wide, flashing the innocent look I’d perfected after years of trying to hide my activities from my four—count them, four—overprotective, overbearing older brothers. If it made them happy to think of me as sweet and innocent, who was I to argue?

  She rolled her eyes. “One of these days, Macy Black, you’re going to show your family your true colors and they’re going to love all of them. All of you.”

  Kaden’s eyebrows snapped together and he twisted his head to look at me again. “You keeping something from us?”

  I huffed out a breath and let my gaze travel the room as I fought to maintain my temper. What I said to Alyssa was true. I was used to my brothers’ controlling ways. Over the years, I mostly just smiled and nodded and found ways to do my own thing with none of them the wiser.

  But every once in a while, the overprotectiveness and pressure to stay as innocent as a nine-year-old got on my last nerve. It made me want to spill the beans on everything I’d done in the past few years that broke the rules they seemed to think applied to me just because they said so.

  As I fought down my anger, my gaze landed on two men standing by themselves in the corner of the room—Nash and Gage. They’d been as much a part of my life as my own brothers since as long as I could remember. And when my brothers weren’t around to keep an eye on me, those two had always been happy to fill in.

  But that was before. Staring at them now was almost like staring at strangers. They looked the same. Nash was still classically handsome with his light brown hair and brown eyes. Clean, straight lines defined his cheekbones and brows.

  Gage was darker, broodier, his features a little more rugged. Let’s face it, they were both hot enough that they’d fueled more than one of my hormone-infused, teenage fantasies over the years.

  Not that I’d ever gotten the chance to act on them.

  They’d both gotten a little bulkier over the years, their time in the military building a few more layers of muscle. I’d noticed on one of their rare visits home that they’d gotten a little harder looking, a little more intense.

  But they’d still been Nash and Gage—two of Kaden’s best friends, guys I knew well and cared about. Even when they were home on leave I’d been able to tease smiles from them. They’d mingled with family and friends when members of the den got together.

&nbs
p; The two men I saw now were not the Gage and Nash I knew and loved. They were virtual strangers. The few times I’d run into them since they’d returned home for good, they’d barely acknowledged me. Definitely not normal behavior.

  And speaking of not normal behavior…they were always, always together. In a way that was just…off.

  I wasn’t the only one who’d noticed. I’d wandered into several conversations the last few weeks that told me Nash and Gage had been through something that left them scarred. And not in the way that left marks on the skin that would heal over time.

  No, whatever happened to them left scars that marked them soul deep, in a way that changed them irrevocably.

  Of course, whenever anyone became aware of my presence, conversations stopped. God forbid some tidbit of anything mildly unpleasant hit my innocent ears.

  “Macy? What’s going on?”

  I tuned back in to find Kaden staring at me, his eyes probing as if he was trying to dig out all my deepest, darkest secrets.

  “That’s what I’d like to know.” I shot a look over to Nash and Gage and then looked back at Kaden. “What’s going on with those two?”

  Kaden followed my gaze and his mouth flattened, his lips tightening almost imperceptibly.

  “They’re fine. Nothing for you to worry about, peanut. They just need some time.” His hard look never changed, but he tried to go for nonchalance with his tone.

  I rolled my eyes. “Kaden, don’t feed me that bullshit. I know you guys are all worried about them. I know something’s wrong. And time obviously isn’t making a bit of difference. They’ve been like that for months now.”

  “Don’t say bullshit.”

  I blinked. Seriously?

  Alyssa lost it. She started laughing, her whole body vibrating with it. Kaden turned a scowl on her and she started laughing harder, tears springing to her eyes.

  I fought off a smile. I was annoyed at my brother, for sure, and more than a little concerned about Nash and Gage, but Alyssa’s laughter was contagious.

  After almost a full minute, she quieted, wiping the trace of dampness from beneath her eyes. “I’m sorry. But that was hilarious. You use the f-bomb so often, if I didn’t know better, I’d think you invented the word. Hearing you correct a grown woman about her language.…sorry, baby, that’s too funny.”

  Kaden continued to scowl. But I think some of what Alyssa said might actually have sank in a tiny bit. I could see something working behind the scowl, a hint of understanding that made a small kernel of hope grow inside me.

  All I could do was shrug. “Like I said. I’m used to it.”

  “Wouldn’t it be nice to get unused to it?” Alyssa asked.

  The thought danced through my head—the freedom of being able to be myself. How amazing would it be to share all of myself with my family? Not just the bits and pieces of myself they’d find acceptable?

  I focused back on Alyssa and Kaden to find Kaden’s gaze locked on my face. His scowl was gone, replaced by a more thoughtful look.

  After a moment, he shook his head. “I’m going to go see what kind of trouble Mason is getting up to.”

  He pressed a fast, hard kiss on Alyssa’s lips and then stood, walking out the sliders into Aunt Nola’s backyard.

  I stared after him a minute and then found my gaze pulled back to the two men in the corner. For the first time in a long time, I felt my bear stir inside me. I’d started to think she’d gone into permanent hibernation, fat and lazy and curled up in a comfy corner somewhere way down deep inside me.

  But right this minute, I felt a tug at my heart. It was similar to the tug I got when I found another animal in need of rescuing or worked to find homes for the abandoned pets at my shelter. Something about it wasn’t quite the same, though.

  My strays didn’t awaken my bear. They didn’t pull her from a rest so long, I’d begun to worry I’d lost that part of me.

  Now I could feel her languorously stretching, taking stock of her surroundings before she suddenly focused on the two men in the corner with all of her predatory instincts.

  As the intensity of her attention grew, my nerve endings began to fire like little pinpricks under my skin. A bevvy of butterflies swooped through my stomach and a fierce feeling of possessiveness clawed its way through me, digging in and settling into every fiber of my being.

  With my gaze firmly trained on Nash and Gage, I could almost hear my rational brain click off and something much more deep and primitive switch on. Only one word could take form in my mind.

  Mine.

  “Hey, Macy, you okay?” A hand landed on my shoulder and gave me a gentle shake.

  I blinked, fighting my way through the thick, primal fog that enveloped me. I shifted my gaze to find Alyssa leaning forward in her seat, her brows pulled together in worry.

  I shook my head. What just happened? “Sorry. I guess I drifted off there for a second.”

  She wiggled back into the couch and she glanced between me and the spot where Nash and Gage stood. I don’t know how long I’d been lost in my own little world, but judging by the smirk slowly twisting Alyssa’s lips, I’d have to guess it was long enough to be noticeable.

  “Drifted off. That’s one way to put it,” she teased.

  I flopped back in my seat. “What? I can’t be worried about guys I grew up with?”

  “Oh, was that concern I saw on your face? ‘Cause from where I was sitting, it looked more like…hunger.” Laughter tinged her voice.

  I squinted at her and wrinkled my nose. “I was just trying to think of how I can help Nash and Gage. They’re good friends, and I hate to see them having a hard time.”

  Her laughter died, but I could see the amusement still lurking behind her eyes and in the tipped up corners of her mouth. “I understand. I know the guys have all been worried about them. And it would be great if you could figure out a way to get them back to themselves.” A wicked grin stole over her face and I braced myself. “Of course, from the look you were wearing, I’d say maybe you’ve thought of a few things you’d like to try. And at least two of them were totally X-rated.”

  I shot her a dirty look as she grinned at me, but movement from the corner caught my attention. Nash and Gage turned almost in unison and headed for the back door. Were they leaving?

  At the thought, my bear started pacing restlessly inside me, urging me to get up and follow them. It took a great deal of strength to stay rooted in my spot.

  My bear eased down with a disgruntled growl once the men were out of our sight. I turned to Alyssa and decided I’d take my chances and confess. “Okay, so I might have noticed over the years that Nash and Gage are totally hot.”

  She nodded. “Oh, yeah. Totally.”

  I grinned, but then let it slip from my face as I went on more quietly, “But I really do think they need some help. I wish I could think of something to do.”

  The minute the words left my mouth, a resolve grew inside me. I would help them. I wasn’t going to sit here wishing I could do something. I’d keep trying until I found a way to break through.

  I was going to do whatever it took to bring Nash and Gage back to life.

  Chapter 2

  Macy

  It took me all of two days to figure out how to help my brother’s best friends. After considering their behavior, I decided there was only one way to approach their problem—divide and conquer.

  I’d tried to come up with a reason to separate them, but it wasn’t as easy as I thought it would be. Finally this morning the perfect opportunity presented itself.

  While I spent the morning cleaning cages at the small animal shelter and rehabilitation center I ran on the edge of town, I got a call from an elderly Kodiak resident about a stray cat. The woman had been feeding the stray for a few weeks, but today the cat showed up injured and looking obviously pregnant. The woman had tried to catch her, but the cat managed to escape into the woods.

  My heart twisted at the thought of a scared and injured animal dying alone
in the forest. Bad enough on its own, but even more horrible if she was pregnant. I promised the woman I’d check it out.

  It was only as I was jumping into the battered old pick-up truck I’d inherited after it got passed down the line through each of my brothers that it occurred to me that this was the perfect opportunity to get one of the guys on his own.

  I pointed my truck in the direction of the Ursus offices, the home of the security business owned by my brother Kaden, along with Mason, Nash and Gage. I kept my fingers crossed the entire time, hoping I’d find Nash and Gage there when I arrived.

  Luck was on my side. As soon as I strolled into the office, I found all the guys, plus Alyssa, in the reception area. Alyssa worked as the office manager, and from the looks of things she had the guys firmly in hand.

  I hid my grin as I watched her handing out files and instructions with the precision of a drill sergeant. What made it even better was seeing all four big, tough ex-Special Forces soldiers, not to mention fierce bear shifters, nodding and accepting her direction without a word.

  When Alyssa finished, her eyes found mine over the top of Kaden’s shoulder. I couldn’t help my smirk, and judging by the way she pressed her lips together, she shared my amusement.

  “Macy! What brings you here today?” As soon as my name left Alyssa’s lips, all four guys swung around to face me.

  I allowed my smirk to grow into a full-blown grin. “You guys must be losing your touch if you let little old me get the drop on you.” I batted my eyelashes at the group, not the least intimidated by the hard looks I got.

  Mason cracked first. He grinned and came over and wrapped an arm around my neck, his hold more headlock than hug. “Don’t worry, munchkin. If a real threat walked in, we’d be more than aware.”

  I narrowed my eyes and elbowed him in the ribs. “I could be a real threat. You don’t know what kind of skills I possess.”

  “The ability to make a pest of yourself in a single bound?” Mason’s easy smile took the edge off his teasing.