by Vikki Vaught
They went upstairs, and he led her to her new rooms. When he opened the door, and stepped back for her to enter first, she looked around the beautifully appointed sitting room. The soft shades of peach with accents of seafoam green made it feel warm and inviting. There were plenty of plump cushions on the sofa, and she could imagine curling up for a good, long read.
French doors opened onto a balcony overlooking the gardens, and she spied a lake in the distance. The gardens appeared well-maintained, and she imagined they would be lovely in the spring.
Jonathan moved behind her and stroked her shoulders. “My mother loved to garden. I have maintained them as a memorial to her.” Turning her around, he pointed. “Your bedchamber is through that door, and mine is on the opposite wall. We each have a private dressing room and bathing room attached. I trust you will be happy here. Please change anything you want.”
“The sitting room is delightful,” she assured him. “May I see my bedchamber?”
“Of course, my dear. Follow me.” As they entered, she noticed the color scheme matched the sitting room. The counterpane on the bed was a deeper shade of peach with delicate ivory lace trim, and a mound of comfortable pillows lay against the headboard. She could not wait to luxuriate amongst them.
“Oh, Jonathan, it’s lovely. I shall be very happy here. I shan’t need to change a thing. Is that the door to my dressing room?”
“Yes, and your bathing chamber is attached,” he told her. “I had these rooms modernized when I remodeled, so there’s running water in the bathing room. No need for anyone to carry water upstairs.”
“Thank goodness. I have to admit I’m somewhat spoiled since Sanderford Park has been modernized as well. Sarah will appreciate this, and I see she has already put away my things.” She walked to the chest and peered inside.
He took her hand. “Come with me. I will show you my rooms.”
Jonathan’s bedchamber was enormous. A huge bed with a deep green velvet counterpane occupied the center of the room. There were two wingback chairs with matching ottomans in front of the fireplace. A book lay on the table between the chairs with a pair of spectacles on top.
“You wear spectacles? I’ve never seen you with them on. I want to see them on you,” she queried.
Jonathan picked the glasses up and put them on. “I only need them for reading. That’s why you’ve never seen me wear them. Do you like my bedchamber?”
Kathryn walked to the chairs and ran her hand over the back of one. “It looks comfortable and masculine. The moss green walls are very serene and restful, I imagine. Thank you for showing me our rooms. They’re lovely. I’m sure we shall spend many quiet evenings in the sitting room. We can read to each other this coming winter.”
He pulled her into his arms and kissed her. Kathryn responded, allowing him to deepen the kiss. A tingling sensation ran through her as he pulled her close. Their bodies touched chest to thigh, and something hard probed her belly.
She pushed him away as anxiety set her pulse racing. “Jonathan, I like your kiss, but do not pull me too close. I could feel your…ah…arousal, and it makes me uncomfortable.” She sat in one of the chairs and looked at him.
He took the other chair, leaned forward, and took her hand. “I’m sorry, darling. I will be more careful in the future. I don’t want you to be uncomfortable, but just because you arouse me does not mean I’ll act on it. You’re a very beautiful woman, and it’s my body’s way of responding. I promise I’m quite harmless. You will enjoy having me hold you close, once you realize you have nothing to fear. Now enough of that. Let me show you your studio. I hope it pleases you.”
The studio was amazing. Jonathan had furnished it with plenty of art supplies and canvases. The unfinished portrait of his brother and family sat on the easel, and she could not wait to work on it. She wanted it to be perfect for the children and Jonathan.
After luncheon, she went upstairs to visit the schoolroom. Jane ran to her and showed her a drawing she was working on. The governess, Miss Mills, assured her both children were good students.
Frankford still seemed a little withdrawn, but not Jane. The little girl bubbled with enthusiasm. “Lady Kathryn, will you return after I finish my schoolwork and have tea?”
“I would be happy to, and please call me Aunt Kathryn. After all, you’re my niece now.” She hugged her. “I shall return at three.”
Kathryn returned to her new studio and spent the next couple of hours working on the portrait. Her mind drifted to what happened in Jonathan’s room. She had not been afraid, only nervous when she’d felt his arousal. She firmly believed he would not do anything she did not want. She enjoyed having him hold her, and she loved his kisses. They made her feel warm and tingly.
Could I be feeling desire? The very thought shocked her, because she’d been sure she would never experience it. She decided the next time Jonathan held her she would not pull away, even if she did feel his arousal. He’d sounded so logical when he explained why he’d become aroused. She had no reason to be fearful.
At three o’clock, she returned to the nursery, and Jane had everything prepared. They sat at the little table and chairs with two of her dolls. Kathryn enjoyed it because she’d done this many times with her nieces, and it brought forth fond memories.
After she finished having tea with Jane, Frankford asked her to read a story. She spent a pleasant hour with the children, then went downstairs and joined Jonathan and his sister.
Elaine was already seated when she entered the drawing room, so she joined her on the sofa. “I want to thank you for being one of my attendants yesterday. I have something for you. I hope you like it.” Kathryn pulled a wrapped gift from her pocket and handed it to Elaine.
When her sister-in-law opened it, she clasped the bracelet to her. “Oh, thank you, Kathryn. This is so pretty. I’ve always wanted one with charms. I already love it ever so much.”
“It’s a tradition to give everyone in the bridal party a gift. You looked lovely yesterday. Purple is a good color for you with your golden blonde hair and green eyes. Have you used Madame Bovary’s Boutique before?”
“I have. When Allison came for her last visit…” she trailed off and swiped at the corner of her eyes, but the young girl swallowed, then continued, bravely hiding her distress. “she convinced Jonathan to allow Madame Bovary to make me a few dresses.” Elaine turned pleading eyes on her. “Everything I had last year no longer fits. I’ve grown two inches taller, and my gowns have grown tight across my chest. Please say I can have more gowns from Madame Bovary?”
Pleased to be of assistance to her new sister-in-law, she replied, “I shall talk to your brother, but I’m sure he will agree. Your figure is more mature than the average fifteen-year-old. I’m sure Madame Bovary can design appropriate gowns for you, befitting your age. If he agrees, we shall go tomorrow.”
Jonathan entered. “Where do you plan to go? Is it somewhere I would like to go?”
Kathryn smiled. “No, it’s not. Elaine has mentioned she needs new clothing for the winter, and if you agree, I will take her to Madame Bovary for her new wardrobe. She has the best designs in Bath. Elaine looked nice yesterday at the wedding, did she not? Madame Bovary made that gown.”
“Just make sure she still looks like a fifteen-year-old. It’s three years before she has her come-out, and she’s still a child in many ways, even if she does not look it.” Jonathan accepted a cup of tea from Kathryn.
Her jaw tightened. “I could not agree more. I will make sure her new clothes are appropriate. The last thing I would want to do is encourage any gentleman to think she’s older than fifteen and available for dalliance.”
“You’re no fun at all,” she huffed. “I will be sixteen on November twelfth, and I am not a child. I shall have my come-out in two years, not three. I’m going to my room to read.” Elaine flounced from the room.
Jonathan shook his head as he watched his sister leave then took Elaine’s seat. “I don’t know what I’m going to d
o with her. When my friend Jenkins came to visit, she actually tried to flirt with him. Thank God he has a younger sister and didn’t act on it. At least it’s fairly isolated out here, so there aren’t any young men around.”
She touched his hand. “I think it’s quite natural for a young girl her age to want to try out her feminine wiles. At least it was safe with Baron Jenkins.”
He pinched the bridge of his nose. “Please, watch her closely tomorrow when you’re in town. I know I’m overprotective, but you and I know it would be easy for her to find trouble if we do not watch her carefully. Perhaps I should accompany you after all. I could always go to the Pump Room and drink that nasty water while you’re at Madame Bovary’s.”
Kathryn set her plate on the table. “You’re welcome to come, but I promise I shall watch her carefully. I know better than most how wicked men can prey on young girls.”
“I’m sorry. It’s not that I don’t trust you. I just know Elaine likes to find mischief. When I’m in London, I’m always receiving notes from her governess. I’m hoping you will have a calming effect on her.” Jonathan picked up a cake from his plate and took a bite. After he swallowed, he continued. “Did you try these cakes? These are one of Cookie’s specialties, and my favorite.”
Kathryn smiled. “I did, and they’re quite delicious. Elaine’s behavior is quite typical for a fifteen-year-old. You have no need to worry, especially since there are no young men close by. I think she’s level-headed and mature for her age. You told me you left her with only her governess most of the time. If she found mischief, it was her way of gaining your attention.”
He sighed. “You may be correct, but I’m having a hard time realizing she’s almost grown.”
Choosing to lighten the conversation, Kathryn told him, “Oh, I spent time with the children this afternoon. Frankford is still withdrawn, but he did ask me to read to him. Jane is a darling. We played teatime with her dolls. I plan to spend time with them every day. I also worked on the portrait. I should have it finished by the end of next week. Then I shall start on those miniatures you asked me to do.”
“I’m so grateful you’re able to finish it,” he replied. “I will hang it in the family gallery when it’s finished. Eventually, it will go to Westland Acres when Frankford reaches his majority. Oh, and thank you for spending time with the children. I’m positive your influence will help Frankford. I’ve decided to teach him to ride. He’s old enough, and if he has a horse to care for, it may take his mind off his loss.”
“That’s an excellent idea. He’s the perfect age to learn.” She laid her serviette next to her plate.
“If he can ride, he can accompany me when I ride my estate. Since he’s my heir, he needs to meet all my tenants, so he’ll appreciate the magnitude of managing the marquisate. My father did that for me when I was his age.” He stood. “Well, as much as I enjoy talking to you, duty calls. I’ll see you at dinner.” He leaned over and kissed her cheek, then left the room.
CHAPTER 20
After his meeting, Jonathan went to his room, and Hatton treated his knee. While there, he took a dose of laudanum. Once his manservant departed, he leaned against his chair and closed his eyes. He wanted a drink but resisted temptation. Now that he’d taken Kathryn to wife, he had an even stronger reason to stay away from liquor. How long it would take before the craving would leave him? He would never want her to see him inebriated.
Jonathan was not sure how he would keep her from knowing he desired her. Holding her and not making love to her had caused him a great deal of discomfort. He had to take it slow, but still introduce her to physical touching.
When they kissed earlier, she’d quivered when he deepened their kiss. Would it hurt or help his case if he told her he loved her? Thinking of Kathryn had him hard as stone, and since he could not do anything about that, he grabbed his book and read to take his mind off her.
At dinner, Jonathan shared a few stories from his youth. “You know Roderick and I were only a year apart. The summer when we were ten and eleven, Roderick climbed the tree next to the lake then jumped off the tallest branch. I warned him not to do it, but he didn’t listen.”
She giggled. “Henry was a daredevil at that age. I’m surprised he never broke a limb from his antics.”
“Well, Roderick did. The lake isn’t deep by the tree, and sure enough, when he jumped, he landed on his side and snapped his arm. He spent the rest of the summer in a splint and sling. Father never reprimanded him. He believed the pain of a broken limb was enough punishment.”
Kathryn dabbed at her mouth with her napkin. “Henry fell from a tree when he was six, but Nelson saved him from drowning and taught him to swim that summer. Nelson taught Helen and I how to swim as well. We spent many wonderful afternoons at our lake each summer.”
“Roderick always loved the water. That’s why it was perfect when he inherited Westland Acres from our maiden aunt. As hard as it is to think of losing him, at least he was doing something he loved when he passed. We found the yacht. It washed up on the shore a week after we found Roderick and Allison. It wasn’t even damaged that badly. A huge wave must have flipped it over, and they probably didn’t have time to react.” He sighed. “I wanted to keep our conversation light, but sometimes I need to talk. I’m sorry.”
Tears filled her violet eyes. “I miss them too. Although I didn’t know them long, they went out of their way to make me feel welcome in their home. Jonathan, I want you to confide in me. That’s what being friends means. I’ve never had many friends. I’m a little shy, and I find it hard to talk to people.”
“It’s all right to be shy. I find that endearing.” He pushed away from the table and rose. “If you’re finished with dessert, let us retire to the music room. I want to play tonight. Would you mind listening?”
She smiled. “Of course. I could listen to you for hours.”
After he played for an hour, he asked, “Are you ready for bed? I’m a bit weary this evening.”
“I’m tired as well.” He helped her rise and escorted her upstairs.
When they entered the sitting room, he informed her, “I shall give you thirty minutes to prepare for bed, then return.” She bit her lip, something he noticed she did whenever she grew anxious, but she nodded and entered her room.
When Jonathan entered his chamber, Hatton quickly helped him don his night clothes, then departed. He must be careful if he wanted to convince her to let him into her bed. He decided to go into her chamber, climb in beside her, and see how she reacted.
He knocked, then walked in. “Did I give you enough time?” He casually stretched and yawned. “Oh, you never said whether you want me to accompany you tomorrow. I do want to go to the Pump Room. Did you plan to go anywhere else while you’re in town?”
Kathryn drew a brush through her tresses. He wanted to take the brush from her but refrained. “After we finish selecting Elaine’s new wardrobe, I plan to stop by my mother’s and see the family. I’m sure Henry and Matthew would enjoy your company.”
Jonathan walked to the bed and pulled back the covers. “Then I shall come along. Are you coming to bed, or are you going to sit up a while?”
Apprehension flashed across her pretty face. “I suppose I shall come to bed.” Walking to the right side, she pulled back the covers and crawled in beside him. Jonathan pulled her into his arms and kissed her cheek, then closed his eyes. She remained stiff for a few minutes, but then her body relaxed. Soon her breathing grew steady. That went better than he’d expected.
It might do him in before she gave in, but it would be well worth it. As he enjoyed the feel of her sweet body next to his, he slowly drifted off to sleep.
* * * *
Kathryn heard moaning as she awoke from a sound sleep. It was Jonathan. He thrashed about, and his face was slick with sweat. Clearly, he was in the throes of a nightmare. She shook his shoulder, but he did not awaken.
He started shouting. “No…No…Leave my leg alone.” Again, she tried to wake hi
m, but this time he grabbed her and cried out again.
She stroked his chest and down his arms, hoping to settle him. As she continued to massage his chest, he quieted and stopped thrashing. His breathing evened. At last, the nightmare passed. She continued gently stroking his chest. He rolled toward her and pull her against him. At first, she tensed, then he began rubbing her back. Relaxing her body, she slowly drifted off again.
The next morning, she found Jonathan still asleep beside her. He looked quite a bit younger than when she first met him. The lines around his mouth and eyes were less pronounced, and he did not appear as weary.
His arm was draped across her waist, and when she tried to lift it away, he pulled her against him. Now they were facing each other. He stroked her back and opened his eyes. “Good morning. You look pretty with your face all aglow. I like waking with you beside me. I just realized you’re the first woman I’ve ever slept with.”
Could this be true? “That’s not possible. I’m sure you’ve slept with quite a few women.”
Jonathan grinned. “You’re right, I bedded lots of women, but I never slept with them. To be blunt, once we had sex, I left and went home to my own bed. I promise…you’re the first woman I’ve ever slept with.”
“Why didn’t you want to stay with them?” She found this conversation fascinating.
“I always grew restless. You know what I also realized? I’ve never made love to a woman. I now realize there is a big difference. Oh, I called it making love, but love never entered into it. It was always for sexual gratification. We haven’t had sex, but I do make love to you.”
She drew her brows together. “Now you’re confusing me. How have we made love?”
“There are many ways to make love. When I hold you in my arms and kiss you, it feels different than when I was with other women, and I think it’s because I care for you.” He kissed her. “Do you know why it feels different?”
