“Tanner,” she cried. But they closed the doors, cutting her off from him.
Dusty reached her side and grabbed her when her legs gave way beneath her. She went hot, then cold, and the edges of her vision began to blacken.
“Rowdy, take Bridey to the hospital with you,” Dusty’s voice floated to her from a distance. “Where’s Shawn?”
“Right here” came the boy’s voice.
“Go with them. I’ll bring Jules.”
“Dusty,” Rowdy called, “get his bag!”
Darkness enveloped her, and then there was nothing.
JULES’S NOSE BURNED and she brushed at it, hitting something warm. She twisted her head away from the offensive, tear-wrenching smell.
“Come on, Jules,” a man’s voice urged her. “Open your eyes, hon.”
Dusty. She could feel hard ground beneath her. Slowly opening her eyes, she saw him kneeling beside her.
“Good,” he said. He was grinning at her, but his brown eyes were filled with concern. He helped her to a sitting position and then took her by the waist to help her to her feet. “Let’s go. We need to get to the hospital.”
Tanner’s hurt.
The thought hit her like a sonic boom, its force making her stagger. “Oh, God,” she moaned.
Steadying her, Dusty gripped her shoulders and bent to her level. His gaze bore into her. “Listen to me, Jules. You’ve got to get hold of yourself. You can’t fall to pieces. It won’t help you and it won’t help Tanner.”
Taking a deep breath, she nodded. “But Rowdy doesn’t want me there. He wanted me gone.” Tears filled her eyes at the thought of having to face the ranch foreman and fight him to be with Tanner.
Dusty gave her a shake. “You’re wrong, Jules. He just didn’t want you to see Tanner until they’d cleaned him up.”
Panic stilled her heart, and she couldn’t raise her voice above a rough whisper. “Is Tanner…going to be all right?”
Dusty’s sigh frightened her even more. “Damn horse split his hard head open a tad. He was unconscious when they left here, but my guess is he’ll be kicking and screaming to get out in no time.”
Relief made her weak. He caught her once more around the waist and started to lead her away. “Wait,” she said, stopping. “Tanner’s bag. I remember hearing Rowdy say to bring it.”
Dusty reversed their direction and pointed a few yards ahead. “It should be over there.”
When they were detained by a mustached man with a notepad and pen asking questions about Tanner’s career, Jules slipped away. It took one glance in the area where Dusty had pointed to identify Tanner’s bag, sitting worn and forlorn against a wall. Still feeling wobbly, she bent and picked it up. Her energy had deserted her. Only fear remained. And she knew she could never go through it again.
Chapter Ten
Jules waited by Dusty’s truck while he asked for directions to the hospital where Tanner was being transported. It didn’t take long to find someone who knew and Dusty was unlocking and opening the door for her.
“Twenty minutes, maybe,” he said as she climbed into the truck. “But I think I can make it quicker.”
She waited as patiently as possible as he slid into the driver’s seat and started the engine. “I don’t care how fast you go. Just don’t get stopped.”
He glanced over to grin at her as he drove through the crowded parking lot. “But I have a lawyer with me. Surely you could bail me out in no time.”
“I’d let the police take you, and I’d drive on to the hospital,” she replied. “And how can you joke at a time like this? Tanner is on his way to the hospital with a concussion.”
“Why are you thinking the worst?” he asked, pulling out onto the street.
“Because I know just how bad a head injury can be.”
“And I’ve had more concussions than I can count.” His sigh was heavy as he maneuvered through traffic. “Look, Jules, there’s no sense thinking the worst until that’s what we know it is. You gotta have hope, because without it…I know Tanner’s bronc riding is hard for you to deal with, and I know what happened today is the reason why. You’ve just been waiting for it or something like it to happen, haven’t you?”
She couldn’t honestly say she hadn’t, but she wouldn’t admit it, either.
“It was a fluke that he got hung up in the rigging and tossed on the ground like that, but it happens,” Dusty continued when she didn’t answer. “It’s happened to him before, so don’t be thinking it’s your fault in some way.”
She understood that Dusty was only trying to be honest with her, and she was glad he was. At this point, she needed someone who wouldn’t sugarcoat things. “I’ve tried to be supportive. And I’m trying to be positive. It’s just very difficult.”
“I know you have, and I appreciate it.”
“But you said—”
“Yeah, I know what I said. But I’ve also seen how hard you’ve been trying to accept his bronc riding, not just trying to look like you do, so maybe it doesn’t apply. If it ever did.” He took a breath and glanced at her briefly. “Don’t tell anybody you heard me say it, but you’re a good woman. Tanner’s my best friend and I only want the best for him. I think he’s found it with you, so don’t disappoint me.”
He added a smile, but Jules couldn’t return it or even reply. It was too hard to think while worrying about Tanner. The future, even if only a few hours, was too far away.
“They’ll probably run some tests if he hasn’t gained consciousness,” Dusty said. “An MRI, CT scan, whatever all those fancy tests are they do. By the time we get there, they may know more. Until then, let’s concentrate on him being okay. All right?”
“All right,” Jules answered, and did her best to stay positive. It wasn’t as easy as it sounded.
The rest of the ride to the hospital seemed endless, but they finally arrived. At the Emergency admittance desk, they were told Tanner was stable and had been moved to a private room. After getting directions, the pair walked through the hushed hallways, searching for the area where they expected the others would be waiting. The farther they went, the faster Jules’s heart beat.
What if Tanner’s injuries were worse than they’d been told? What if it was her fault he’d been hurt? If he’d lost his concentration for just one second because of her, how would she ever face the rest of the family? How would she face Rowdy, knowing he might have been right all along? But worst of all, how would she face herself?
Her anxiety grew with each step. One adrenaline rush after another made her senseless. Despite her love for Tanner, all the ifs, ands and buts crowded her mind. Injuries in rodeo were common. Tanner’s own father had died competing. And no matter how often she tried to tell herself she’d get used to the savagery of the sport, she hadn’t. Her fear hadn’t vanished and might never, even though she was able to watch. She wasn’t sure she could continue this way, no matter how much she loved Tanner. Her only hope was that he would decide he’d had enough.
“There they are.”
Dusty’s voice broke into her thoughts and his footsteps quickened. She lengthened her shorter stride to keep up, and he squeezed her hand, obviously for strength and encouragement. Dread filled her as they turned the corner and approached Tanner’s family, sitting in the barren waiting area.
HIS HEAD HURT. His arm felt like a dead weight when he tried to raise it to massage the throbbing. He carefully opened his eyes. The room was unfamiliar and dark. Without moving his head, he tried to get his bearings.
Hospital.
His last memory was of being helped to stand after his ride, and then a blinding pain had hit him. He’d made the time. And it had been a good ride, he knew that, too. Jules would be pleased.
His eyes slowly drifted shut, and darkness descended once again.
“HOW’S HE DOING?” Dusty asked Bridey when they joined her and Shawn in the waiting room.
Jules noticed that Rowdy was missing and felt a moment of relief. She was battling enough
guilt as it was, without having to face him.
Bridey looked at Jules and patted the empty space next to her on the sofa, while she answered Dusty. “They’re taking him down for some tests in a few minutes. The doctor said they’d know more when they’re done.”
“How serious do they think it is?” Jules asked, dreading the answer she might hear as she joined Bridey on the sofa.
The older woman frowned, scooting over to make more room for Jules. “The doctor said it’s hard to tell. Tanner’s still being unconscious isn’t a good sign, but it might not mean anything. That’s why they’re doing the tests.”
Shawn, who was sitting in a chair across a small table from them, leaned forward. “Dusty’s the one who knows about concussions.”
“Most bull riders do,” Dusty replied. “Not so much with bronc riders. They have more shoulder and back problems.” He turned to look at Shawn. “You keep that in mind.”
Shawn fought hard to keep a smile from springing to his lips. “There’s always team roping with you, Dusty.”
“That there is, and we’re going to get back to practicing just as soon as we can. No reason you can’t be in two events.”
Jules was aware of the conversation as it continued, but she wasn’t hearing it. She was remembering her own accident. Before it had happened, she had never been afraid to climb on a horse—any horse. She’d known the dangers inherent in jumping, but she was a good rider—an excellent rider, according to her trainer, who’d kept pushing her to do more. She’d expected to make the jump as she rode up to it. Her horse had taken similar ones with no problem. But she’d been pushing herself for several weeks, thanks to her trainer, and was feeling the tiniest bit nervous. That was all it had taken. For whatever reason—maybe her horse had sensed she wasn’t one hundred percent with him—he had decided not to take the jump. Before she had realized what was happening, she had felt herself being propelled in the air.
She knew even better than some people that there were no guarantees. A person either found something else to focus on or gave it his or her all. She had chosen to walk away. Tanner gave it his all.
Would he be like her? Even if he was all right when he regained consciousness, would he decide, as she had, that it wasn’t worth it? She would never tell anyone, but she hoped he’d be ready to stop risking his life. In fact, there was a part of her that was counting on it, even though she knew it was wrong. After all, he had shown her that she didn’t have to be afraid of riding. But that didn’t mean she wasn’t still afraid for him.
They all looked up at the sudden ruckus at the end of the long hallway. Buzzers and bells went off, and hospital personnel scattered. Even the nurse at the nurses’ station left her desk and hurried away. Jules prayed it didn’t have anything to do with Tanner. She knew the others were doing the same.
“Did they say ‘code blue’?” Shawn asked. His voice was strained and his face starkly white.
Jules shook her head. “It isn’t Tanner,” she whispered, determined to stay positive.
Dusty nodded. “They’ll let us know,” he said, his voice not nearly as strong as it had been earlier.
The wait seemed to last forever, but in reality it was only a few minutes. The nurse returned to the desk and smiled at them, but said nothing. That little bit gave Jules hope.
Jules turned to look when she heard footsteps approaching, but her heart took a slight drop when she saw it was Rowdy.
“How’s he doing?” he asked.
They all looked at one another, and Dusty finally answered, “As far as we know, he’s still unconscious. They’re running some tests. We’re waiting on the—”
When he stopped, everyone turned. The doctor was walking their way and looked tired, but when he joined them, he smiled.
Bridey took Jules’s hand and gripped it tightly and they both stood. “Do you have any news?” she asked the doctor.
He looked from one to the other before answering. “Preliminary results show no permanent damage, which is good news. There’s a little swelling on the brain, but we expect that to take care of itself over time.”
Relief flooded Jules. Beside her, Bridey squeezed her hand and asked, “How much time?”
“My guess would be several hours, maybe by morning, but it could be longer. Some take more time. It just depends on the patient. You’re all from out of town?”
“We’re here for the rodeo,” Rowdy answered.
Bridey nodded. “We’re from Desperation, not far from Oklahoma City.”
“But you’re staying here?”
“We have motel rooms not far from the arena.”
“Good,” the doctor said. “My suggestion is for all of you to go on back to your motel, get some rest and come back here in the morning. There’s no reason for you to stay here at the hospital. Mr. O’Brien isn’t in any danger. If there’s any change before morning, someone will call you. Just leave your name and a number where you can be reached with the nurse.”
“I’ll go do that now,” Dusty said, and started for the desk.
“Any questions?” the doctor asked.
Bridey shook her head. “None that I can think of. Not right now, anyway.”
“If you have any later, just call and ask the nurse. She can get in touch with me if needed.” The doctor turned and left them to decide what to do next.
Dusty returned from the nurses’ station. “He’s in his room again, but he’s still unconscious.”
The frown on Rowdy’s face only intensified Jules’s guilt. Whether she was responsible for Tanner’s accident or not, Rowdy believed she was.
“He’s a tough one,” Rowdy said. “He’ll be fine. Up and around in no time.”
Bridey patted Jules’s hand. “Of course he will. The O’Briens are hardy stock.”
Determined to say what needed to be said, Jules gently pulled her hand from Bridey’s. Turning to Tanner’s foreman, she took a deep breath. “I’m sorry, Rowdy,” she whispered.
He looked at her through narrowed eyes. “Nothin’ to be sorry for. Doesn’t have anything to do with you. It’s just one of those things that happen.”
“But—”
He moved to put his arm around her. “I hope you’re not blaming yourself, Jules. He’s had plenty of injuries in his life, some worse than this one. None of those were anybody’s fault, either. I guess it’s time I admit Tanner’s right. You’re good for him. Haven’t seen him ride better or be so happy.”
Bridey joined them, smiling first at Rowdy before turning to Jules. “Why don’t you go in and see him, Jules? The nurse said earlier that he was mumbling something about jewelry. I’m sure he was calling for you.”
Rowdy patted her arm and stepped back. “He’s a fighter, girl. He’ll be telling us all what to do in no time. You go on in for a minute.”
Jules nodded and walked to the door of Tanner’s room. Before pushing it open, she wiped her damp palms on her jeans.
Inside, the room was dark, with only a small, dim light burning above the bed. She crept closer in silence, intent on the figure lying in the bed. His black hair and tanned face were starkly evident in their stillness on the pillow. His color had returned, and he seemed to be breathing easily. A strip of gauze was wrapped around his head to hold the bandage that peeked out at the back.
Not wanting to disturb him, she gently placed her hand on his where it lay on top of the blanket. It could have been worse, she reminded herself. The injury wasn’t as severe as they’d feared. But she also knew that anything could have happened. He could very well be dead, instead of injured.
They could all rest easy now, but she knew she wouldn’t. Not until Tanner was conscious and sitting up in that bed. Or better yet, out of the hospital completely and back with his family on the ranch.
Dusty’s warning came back to haunt her. She thought she’d made her decision, but maybe she was wrong. Maybe it would have been better if she hadn’t shown up at Ponca City, before her heart had become so involved. Better for Tan
ner, too.
She spent a restless night, tossing and turning in her motel-room bed, trying her best not to wake Bridey in the bed beside her. All she knew for certain was that she couldn’t go through watching him get hurt again, and if there was to be a future with him, his bronc riding would be an issue they would have to talk about.
TANNER SAT propped against pillows in the hospital bed, waiting for Jules. Running his hand over the new growth of beard on his face, he wished for a razor. But the doctor had assured him he’d be going home later in the day. A shave could wait.
He’d awakened to a wan sunrise, his room bathed in the dusky light from the windows. His first thought had been of Jules. When the nurse came to check on him later, he’d asked for her, only to be told she and the others had gone for breakfast. Disappointed, he’d grumbled at the nurse while she took his pulse and blood pressure. Now, left alone, he strained for sounds in the hallway outside. When he finally heard familiar voices, he waited, anxious to see them all, but especially Jules.
The door opened and she walked in. Tanner’s breathing stopped at the sight of her. The thought had crossed his mind that she might have knuckled under to her fear and taken off. But she hadn’t. She’d stayed.
He crooked his finger at her. “Come here, darlin’,” he whispered roughly.
“Everyone is waiting to see you, but they insisted I come in first.” She approached with cautious steps, and he noticed the dark circles under her eyes. Her sparkle had gone, and she looked worn-out, but she was still the most beautiful woman in the world.
“They can wait a little longer.” He patted the bed. “Closer, darlin’. I want to be able to touch you.”
With the same caution, she perched on the edge of the bed. Distress and worry filled her eyes. “How’s your head?” she asked.
“I can’t feel a thing, now that you’re here.” He stroked her cheek with the back of his hand, drinking in the feel of her skin. She smiled, but it didn’t stop the worry that formed in his mind. “Are you okay?”
The Rodeo Rider (Harlequin American Romance) Page 15
