My Forever Valentine

by Melody Heck Gatto

  Zane’s voice was so loud, Spencer would’ve sworn his cousin was shouting. And the shaking was pointless and annoying and honestly making him nauseous.

  Spencer moved his hand to stop the room from spinning, keeping his eyes tightly closed. The fabric underneath his fingers alerted him to the fact that he was still on the couch. Slowly, he opened his eyes but didn’t move. His head felt like it weighed twenty pounds and his neck might snap under the sheer weight of it. The room spun, even though he was still lying down. Squinting at the light, he covered his eyes.

  “Z, why are you yelling?” he mumbled.

  “I am not yelling,” Zane said, lowering his voice. “I’ve been trying to wake you up for ten minutes. I was starting to get worried, man.”

  “As long as you didn’t try mouth to mouth,” Spencer teased, but quickly regretted the smirk he attempted when the nausea got worse. “Well, as you can see, I’m fine.”

  Closing his eyes again, Spencer rolled onto his side, grasping on to the couch as his surroundings did somersaults. He’d been drunk before, but never so drunk that the next day the room tumbled, even though his head was still resting on the pillow.

  “Yeah, you look real fine,” Zane challenged. “Spencer, I’m making a fresh pot of coffee. You need to get up. Harley is here.”

  What was she doing here? “Tell her to go away,” he mumbled into the pillow.

  “She can hear you,” Harley said.

  Shit.

  “Why are you being rude? Get up, Spence,” Zane demanded.

  Sighing, Spencer did his best to compose himself and look alive. Not because his cousin had told him to, but because what other choice did he have? Harley was there.

  Sitting up, he looked around. Harley was standing in the corner of the room by the front door, her arms folded across her chest.

  “Did I miss a party?” She waved her hand at the line of empty beer cans in front of him on the coffee table. “You didn’t answer my texts or my calls. I was worried.”

  “No need. I’m here. I’m fine,” he said flatly, in no mood to talk to her, or anyone, right now. “Welfare check complete. You’ve done your good deed for the day; you can go home now.”

  “Wait, what?” she asked, her voice full of confusion.

  “I’m sure Mr. Lame is waiting for you,” he grumbled.

  “What are you talking about?” Harley asked, with a measure of bewilderment in her voice. “Are you still drunk?”

  “No,” he answered quickly. But judging by the way his head was still spinning, that was a lie. Even he was surprised that he could carry on a coherent conversation with how tipsy he felt.

  “Spencer,”—she took a few strides toward him—“I’m confused. What’s going on?”

  “You know exactly what’s going on,” he snapped. Which was a mistake. The pointed words that came out of his mouth made his head pound. He clutched the couch as another wave of nausea came over him and then, luckily, disappeared.

  “You’ve caught me at a disadvantage, because I really don’t.” Harley began to move closer to the couch, her face twisted in concern. “Babe, talk to me—”

  “I don’t see why you want to talk to me, when I’m sure Mr. Lame is available.”

  “Um, what?” She shook her head. “I don’t want to talk to Isaac. You aren’t making any sense.” Her voice was high pitched and slowly becoming frantic.

  “Spence, why are you being such a jerk?” Zane asked.

  He shot his cousin a glare. This was none of his business.

  “Harley, please just go.” His words were harsh, and it was probably the alcohol talking, but he was in no condition for a heart to heart. And honestly, he was still licking his wounds and wasn’t ready for the breakup talk.

  The way his heart hurt for the only woman he ever loved, he wasn’t sure he would ever be ready.

  Chapter Eleven

  HARLEY

  At the sound of the front door opening, Harley pulled the covers over her head and pretended to be asleep. Lily was home, and she had no interest in rehashing her miserable evening. If she had her way, this would all be a bad dream.

  “Harley? You here?”

  Her heart ached, and she didn’t want to talk to anyone tonight. She glanced across the room to her headphones sitting on her desk. Harley wondered if she had time to grab them before Lily arrived at her room. Maybe Lily wouldn’t bother her if she appeared to be sleeping with her headphones on.

  Lily poked her head into the bedroom. “Harley? You sleeping? It’s only seven o’clock.” She flopped down on Harley’s bed with such force that even if she were sleeping, she’d be awake now.

  “Oh, you’re home. I didn’t hear you come in,” Harley said with complete sarcasm.

  Lily tilted her head and stared at Harley while scrunching up her face. “You don’t look so good.”

  “If I say that I don’t feel so good, will you leave?” Her words sounded harsher than she planned. She had no intention of hurting her best friend. “Sorry Lil, I’ve had a bad night.”

  “Uh-oh. That doesn’t sound good. I think what you need is ice cream and some girl talk.” Lily pulled off the covers and dragged her out of bed.

  As much as Harley didn’t want to follow, she didn’t resist. Ice cream wouldn’t mend her heart, but it couldn’t hurt.

  Lily grabbed a gallon of ice cream from the freezer and collected two spoons from the drawer. Harley joined her at the kitchen table.

  Taking a spoonful of ice cream, Lily said, “Spill.”

  Harley scooped her own spoonful of ice cream and took a moment to think of the best way to start. “I have no idea what’s happening.”

  “With Spencer?”

  Harley nodded. “I went to go see if he was okay.”

  “Right, since he wasn’t responding to you.” Lily recapped Harley’s misery.

  Harley nodded as she took another spoonful of ice cream. “He was passed out on the couch with beer cans everywhere. I don’t know when he started drinking, but I guess that’s why he wasn’t answering my phone calls.”

  “But why?” Lily frowned in confusion.

  “That’s the best part of it all.” She tamped down the frantic anger that bubbled in her chest. She wanted to cry, maybe break something, in the hope it would make her feel better. But she knew that nothing would calm her until Spencer was willing to talk to her and tell her what was wrong. “He refused to talk to me. I have no idea what’s wrong, or what even happened that he turned to a case of beer. And he said something that really made no sense at all.”

  “What did he say?”

  “He told me to go talk to Isaac instead. He referred to Isaac being here for me to talk to.” She shrugged her shoulders. “What does that even mean? First, why would I want to talk to Isaac? And second, why would Isaac be here for me to talk to? I haven’t wanted to talk to Isaac since we broke up! Why would I now?”

  She’d never told him that Isaac stopped by to harass her, because she’d handled it and had thrown Isaac out of her apartment—and hopefully her life—for good. But Spencer wouldn’t know any of that, because it wasn’t as if he’d given her a chance to tell him.

  Lily appeared deep in thought as she snacked on ice cream. “Isaac? Why would he be here?”

  “I don’t have any idea.” Harley had told him to leave and hadn’t been interested in anything he had to say, and she had no intention of seeing him again.

  “Maybe Isaac said something to Spencer at the office? Something that led him to think you guys were talking?”

  Harley shook her head. “It just doesn’t make sense. You should’ve seen him. Spencer was so angry. But there was more to it. Behind that anger there was pain. I could see it in his eyes. He wouldn’t elaborate on anything; he just wanted me to leave.”

  Her heart sank. She had never felt a pain like this before; it was deep in her gut. What made this situation even more difficult was having no idea why Spencer was mad. If she knew what she had done, she could deny it or
feel guilty. But she was left wondering. And that was the worst feeling.

  “If anyone should be upset right now, it should be me. The way Spencer punched Isaac out of nowhere. And while I know why he did it, it doesn’t make it right or okay. I was upset that he acted like such a brute, but I would’ve gotten over that. I just can’t wrap my head around what is going on right now.”

  “I don’t see his hitting Isaac being as big of a deal as you do. I mean, I am sure Isaac deserved it,” Lily commented. Then quickly getting back on topic, she added, “But, I wouldn’t have left. No matter what he wanted. I’m surprised that you did.”

  “I wasn’t going to stand there any longer and take it.” Harley shrugged. “He didn’t want me there.”

  “I’m not sure Zane will tell me anything, but I’ll see what I can find out.”

  “Thanks, Lil.” She sighed. Scooping more ice cream, she added, “I thought indulging on ice cream right from the container was supposed to make me feel better?”

  “It is.” Lily shrugged. “But I think only one thing is going to make you feel better.”

  Harley laughed sarcastically. “Yeah, that isn’t happening any time soon.”

  “Har, I know you guys were looking at apartments. Don’t think you have to rush to move out. This is your home, too. It’s not like we’re renting out your room— I’m teasing, of course. Stay as long as you want. Maybe give him some time to come to his senses. I mean, come on, you’re the best thing that ever happened to him. I don’t see him letting you go this easily.”

  “Yeah, maybe someone should tell him that.”

  “I can do one better. Just say the word, and I’ll call Zane’s Aunt Alice to talk some sense into that boy,” Lily said with a wink.

  She knew her friend was kidding, sort of. But part of her heart wished Lily would just make the call. Surely his own mother would be able to get through to him. They were so happy until now, and she had no idea what happened.

  HARLEY SAT IN HER SECOND class, trying to focus on the instructor but failing miserably. She hadn’t heard from Spencer in two days. It had been forty-eight long hours since he had told her to go home, since she’d stood in his doorway, dumbfounded at his reaction to her.

  In those two days, she picked up as many extra hours at both of her jobs as possible, just to keep herself busy. Between school and working, she didn’t have an extra second to cry or mope.

  Class was over. She gathered her things up and moved to the next lecture. Again, she tried to focus, but her brain was only concerned about Spencer. Her heart hurt; she missed him.

  He still wasn’t answering her calls or texts. She wished she knew what she had done to make him so upset.

  Was she too harsh on him for acting like a caveman and punching Isaac? Maybe she could’ve shown him a little more support for being a protective boyfriend. But then again, she thought he knew her well enough to know she didn’t need to be protected. Even from Isaac.

  In a trance for the remainder of the day, she went through the motions during her shift at the diner, and eventually joined her study group at the coffee shop. She listened more than she contributed. She doodled in her notebook, making a list of all the things that could possibly be going on with Spencer. But none of them made any sense.

  The more she overthought it, the more possible it seemed that she was the problem.

  She jumped at the sound of a phone buzz nearby, and she lunged for hers, only to see there were no new texts. Every two minutes she re-checked, hoping there would be something from Spencer.

  Looking past her classmates, she could hear the group discussing the quiz next week, but in her fog, all she could do was nod in response. She’d have to copy notes from one of them. Even though she’d probably ace the quiz without them.

  “Harley,” Heather said, snapping her out of her trance. Heather was one of Harley’s classmates, and had blue hair, a lip ring, and was the prettiest girl in the class. “Are you okay?”

  “Yeah, Harley. You aren’t yourself,” another one commented.

  “Yeah, fine. Just have some things on my mind,” she responded.

  But she wasn’t fine. She hadn’t been since that night. The details were fresh in her mind: she had been expecting Spencer at her place the other night and he had never showed. She had gone to look for him, only to find him home and passed out on his couch. And mad at her.

  Which brought her to today, with no more information than she had the other night.

  Her heart sank at the thought of him. She had thought things were going too perfectly with her and Spencer— but what had happened?

  As the study group stood up to leave, Harley sat back and closed her notebook in a daze.

  Heather hung back as the others walked out.

  Guy trouble must’ve been written all over her face, because Heather bent down and whispered in Harley’s ear, “Call him.” Then with a friendly smile, Heather hurried to catch up with her friends.

  And she was right.

  Harley picked up her phone and dialed Spencer’s number.

  It rang twice and then went to voicemail. He sent my call to voicemail.

  Chapter Twelve

  SPENCER

  Spencer sat in his apartment with a replay of last night’s hockey game on the television. Usually he enjoyed watching, even replays, but today it was just background noise as he looked over some contracts that needed signed and sent out before he clocked out for the day.

  He’d left the office at lunch and worked the rest of the day from home. He’d had enough face time with Isaac for this week. And he didn’t trust himself to be around Mr. Lame for too long.

  Signing off on the contracts, he emailed them to the office.

  That was enough work for the week. Closing his laptop, he made a beeline for the refrigerator for a cold beer. He popped it open and took a long, well-deserved drink. It had been one long week, and now he looked forward to a lazy weekend of as much sports as he could watch.

  Looking around the apartment, he noticed Zane’s boxes were stacked and neatly labeled. He’d be moving them to Lily’s place this weekend.

  Spencer had not been looking forward to this. He was prepared to help Zane load the boxes into the moving truck from their apartment. But as much as he wanted to help, moving boxes into Lily’s place might have him running into Harley, and that was something he was not ready for.

  Once Zane was moved out, he would need to figure out what he was going to do. Continue with the plans they had made together or find a suitable backup plan?

  He and Harley had their perfect apartment picked out and an appointment to sign the lease. Spencer would still need a place to live—regardless of what happened with him and Harley. He didn’t like the idea of staying here by himself, but he wasn’t ready to cancel the lease appointment just yet. Maybe a little part of him believed they’d still be going to sign the lease. Or maybe he was fooling himself.

  Because she was back with Isaac.

  His phone rang, and Harley’s face filled the screen. After how terribly he had treated her the other day, he was in no frame of mind to talk to her. He didn’t trust himself not to be harsh to her again. Not after confronting Isaac at her place. Isaac’s words were still fresh in his mind.

  He’d given his heart to this girl, totally and completely, and look at what had happened. This was why he’d never become attached or had serious relationships. He wasn’t built for this kind of hurt. Watching Zane mourn the two people he loved most in this world, his parents, taught Spencer that love equaled pain. And that was something he had never wanted to experience.

  What he hadn’t expected was Harley. She had found a way into his heart and had thrown all his misconceptions about love out the window.

  Until now.

  His heart ached when he hit the button to send her call to voicemail.

  It wasn’t that he didn’t want to talk to her, but he didn’t know what to say. How did he bring up Isaac in conversation? Maybe he should tak
e the hint and bow out gracefully. Isaac had won.

  Maybe he should’ve asked her about the phone calls when he’d first noticed them.

  Not that any of it mattered now. His thoughts went round and round, driving him crazy.

  But he still loved Harley, and he didn’t know what to do with that. He needed advice, and there was only one person to turn to with something like this.

  Spencer slowly dialed the phone.

  “Spencer! Hello dear,” his mom’s voice rang with delight through the phone. “It’s so nice to hear your voice.”

  “I text you all the time.” Spencer rolled his eyes, only because she couldn’t see him. He’d expected her to say that, because it was always her opening line. If it were up to his mom, she would talk to him every single day.

  “I know, but it’s no substitute for hearing your voice.”

  “Okay,” he conceded. “I guess you’re right. I’ll try to call more.”

  “Good. Now that’s settled. How are you doing? And how’s that girlfriend of yours? When will she be ready for some more baking lessons? I think the next one we decided on was my famous pumpkin pies. She really enjoys creating in the kitchen. She is going to make a fine baker.”

  “Well...” He didn’t know how to tell her. But that was the main reason for his call.

  “Spencer Michael,” she demanded, using his middle name, which suggested she meant business. “How is Harley?”

  “She’s busy with school and work.” This wasn’t going well at all. Why was he being so wishy washy? It was as though he couldn’t control what he was saying.

  “And?”

  “And,”—finally he just blurted it out—“I’m pretty sure we are broken up.”

  “You’re pretty sure? What does that mean? I know I am old and out of the loop, but wouldn’t you know if you broke up? Or do you kids do things differently these days?” She was being sarcastic, and he knew that.

  Spencer sighed. He had been dreading this conversation. His mom adored Harley and Lily, and they had been taking cooking lessons from her since last Christmas. His mom was enjoying being able to pass on her kitchen knowledge to willing recipients.