License to Love

by Barbara Boswell

  She walked directly to Steve’s office, a few blocks away. She was perspiring from the summer heat and panting from her brisk pace when she entered the office suite of Legislative Engineers Limited.

  “Oh, hi!” called Steve’s cousin Saran, who was sitting at the reception desk filing her astonishingly long, pointed fingernails. “I don’t know how you nailed him, but congratulations!”

  “Nailed him?” Michelle echoed faintly.

  Saran grinned. “Too bad you weren’t with Steve in Merlton when he made the big announcement. Wow, everybody just went crazy! So when’s the wedding? Is it going to be big, like Jamie’s wedding was? She invited half the world, I think. I can’t picture Steve in a scene like that, but hey, I couldn’t picture him getting married, either. I’m really excited for you both.”

  Michelle stared at Saran, comprehension slowly dawning. Steve had told his family that he was marrying her? She began to tremble.

  “Want me to buzz Steve and tell him that you’re here or are you going to, like, romantically surprise him?” asked Saran.

  “Don’t tell him I’m here,” Michelle said quickly. That way he couldn’t say he didn’t want to see her. Not that she could blame him if he didn’t. When she thought about the things she’d said to him, the hateful, hurtful things that were all untrue—

  If Saran hadn’t been watching expectantly, waiting for her to go in and “romantically surprise” Steve with her appearance, Michelle knew she would have bolted. As it was, she walked slowly back to Steve’s office and quietly opened his door. He was sitting at his desk, talking on the phone. Michelle froze, her hand on the knob.

  Steve glanced up and their eyes connected. And held. “Can I call you back, Don?” Michelle heard him say. She stood in the doorway, her heart thundering in her ears as Steve hung up the phone.

  She was struck by a walloping case of d6j& vu. Just last week she had come to this office, feeling as scared and uncertain as she felt now, to inform Steve of her pregnancy. She’d certainly made a mess of that. What if she blundered now, again? Yesterday he had bared his heart and soul for her and she had laughed and sent him away. One could hardly blame him for having second thoughts about loving her after that.

  What if he sent her away?

  Her anxiety level rose alarmingly, pumping adrenaline through her, making her feel wired and on edge. All she needed was for Steve to greet her with that impersonal, smiling glad-hand of his, the way he had done that fateful day last week, and she would lose it completely.

  But Steve didn’t say anything at all. Michelle found the tense silence even more unnerving than his de rigueur political smile and handshake. Steve Saraceni couldn’t summon a smile, however false? It was unimaginable. He must really hate her, Michelle decided. She was too late, she’d said too much.

  She had to get out of here before she fell apart in front of him. “I—I’ve c-come at a bad time,” Michelle stammered, gulping back the sob that welled in her throat. “I’ll just leave and—”

  Steve crossed the office with the lithe speed of a pouncing cat. “No!” He took her hand, pulled her the whole way inside and closed the door. “You can’t leave, Michelle.”

  He looked as worn and frazzled as she felt, light-years removed from the unruffled, urbane epitome of cool who’d greeted her here last week. Telltale signs of exhaustion enhanced his grim expression.

  “I’ll keep you here until I can make you understand the way I feel about you,” Steve said passionately. “There has to be a way to convince you that I love you, Michelle. I’ll find the right words if you’ll just give me a chance.”

  He slid his hands up her arms and cupped her shoulders. Her nearness sent him reeling. He inhaled the light scent of her perfume, felt her warmth and softness under his hands. A shudder quaked his body. “Please, Michelle,” he said hoarsely.

  Joy surged through Michelle like an exploding rocket. Steve didn’t hate her; he wasn’t going to send her away. He loved her! And finally, she realized how much. “You’ve already proven it to me,” she whispered, tears shining in her eyes.

  She took a step forward, closing the small distance between them, and flung her arms around his neck. “Oh, Steve, I’m so sorry. I accused you of betraying me and my confidences, but I know that you didn’t, you even tried to protect me. You could have defended yourself by telling me about Ed and Leigh, by saying that he was the one who gave you the inside information, but... but you didn’t.”

  Steve’s arms enfolded her in a tight, strong embrace. “I didn’t have the heart to tell you wbjat I knew about Dineen, Michelle. I knew how highly you regarded him, how much you admired the Dineens as the ideal family. I knew you would find out about his affair soon enough and that you’d be crushed to hear about it. I didn’t want to be the one to hurt you with the news.”

  He drew back a little so he could gaze deeply into her eyes. “I’ve hurt you badly enough, Michelle. I was careless and got you pregnant and—”

  “No!” she cried, laying her fingers against his lips to hush him. “Steve, you’re wrong. I don’t blame you for getting me pregnant. It takes two, remember? I’m equally responsible. And you know what? I’m thrilled about this baby. I want our child, Steve. And if you still want me to, I want to marry you and—”

  He didn’t give her time to finish. His mouth caught hers and held it, kissing her deeply, passionately, affirming the fact that they were together again. And that this time all the misunderstanding and mistrust was resolved and behind them.

  When at last they reluctantly, breathlessly drew apart, Michelle gazed up at Steve, her china blue eyes swimming with tears that slowly trickled down her cheeks. He gently followed the track of one with his thumb. “Don’t cry, honey,” he said huskily. “I love you, Michelle. I thought it would never happen to me but when I met you I fell in love and I fell hard.”

  “Oh, Steve, I love you, too. And I should have trusted you, I should—”

  “No recriminations, Michelle,” he interrupted quietly. “I have too many of my own. I should have told you I loved you a long time ago. Then you wouldn’t have felt insecure about my feelings for you, you would have known I wasn’t just using you. And I most definitely should have taken you in my arms that day when you told me about the baby. I was so damn glad to see you, but I tried to act cool. I was still playing games then, looking to get the upper hand, but sweetheart, no more. I said all the wrong things when I should have told you how much I love you and want you and our child. Because it’s true, Michelle. You’re mine and we’re going to be together forever.”

  “We—we won’t end up like the Dineens,” she whispered imploringly.

  “Not a chance. I wouldn’t throw away my life with you because some hot-to-trot political groupie throws herself at me. I’ve gotten all that out of my system, Michelle. I’ve grown up. Loving you doesn’t tie me down, it’s freed me from my selfishness and my, uh, frenetic restlessness.” “That’s an interesting term for a social life that spanned four cities.” Michelle looked up at him, her brows arched. “Your lifestyle before you met me was rather—peripatetic, to say the least.”

  “I’m giving up my lifestyle for a life, a real one.” Steve . laughed and hugged her, swinging her completely off the ground, turning around and around with her in his arms. Then he set her on her feet, letting her slide slowly down the length of his body, turning their release into an intimate, sensual caress.

  “Come on, we’re getting out of here.” He took her hand and pulled her along with him. “We have to get rings and blood tests and a license.”

  “Can’t we make love first?” Michelle asked breathily. “It’s been so long and I’ve missed you so much, Steve.”

  “Sweetie, you don’t have to ask twice.”

  Laughing, loving each other, they walked out of the office and into their future together.

  Epilogue

  Nine months later

  i‘It’s a boy!” the doctor said exultantly, putting the wriggling, squalling
newborn infant into the proud father’s arms.

  Steve was smiling broadly and his dark eyes were suspiciously moist as he showed Michelle their new son. She hardly had time to admire him, though, for she was otherwise occupied—giving birth to their daughter.

  “A girl,” proclaimed the doctor.

  “She’s beautiful!” breathed Steve. He handed the baby boy to Michelle so he could hold their daughter.

  “A dark-haired girl and a blond boy,” the nurse said with a happy sigh. “You have the perfect family.”

  “I have to agree with the nurse,” Steve said later in the privacy of Michelle’s hospital room. He was holding blueeyed Jake while Michelle cuddled black-eyed Julie. “We are the perfect family.” He leaned down to affectionately kiss his wife’s forehead and she smiled up at him, love shining softly in her eyes.

  Early in her pregnancy, tests had revealed the presence of twins and Steve couldn’t have been more attentive and supportive to her throughout. Michelle knew he would be as devoted a father as he was a husband. Having committed himself to the role of family man, he thrust himself into it with his customary determination, vigor and zeal.

  Because twins often come early and fast, the doctors had advised Michelle to stop working midway through her pregnancy, and though quitting her job would have been wrenching at one time, under the circumstances, she was relieved to leave Senator Dineen’s office. Ed’s affair with Leigh Wilson continued with an appalling lack of discretion and taste, leaving the rest of his staff angry and demoralized. One by one, resignations were handed in, and as word of Ed’s scandalous behavior reached the folks in his district back home, point by point, his standing at the polls slowly sank. His re-election was seriously in doubt as a well-spoken, ' idealistic, happily-married contender had announced her intentions to run for the state senate seat.

  With the twins needing her full time, Michelle decided to put her career on hold for a while, but she had a standing offer to work for Legislative Engineers Limited whenever she felt like venturing back into the Harrisburg scene.

  “Oh, I almost forgot, this came for you in the mail today.” Holding the baby in one arm, Steve handed Michelle a thick mailing bag. It was postmarked New York, New York.

  “It’s Ashlinn’s manuscript!” Michelle grinned. “She promised she would send me a copy. She actually found a publisher and sold her book.”

  “She promised, hmm? Seems more like a threat to me.” Steve helped her tear open the bag and remove the manuscript. “Hooked! What kind of a title is that?”

  “It’s about women who love men who don’t love them,” Michelle told him.

  Steve set the manuscript aside. “You can’t relate to that, Michelle. You love a man who loves you more than life itself.” He gazed passionately into her eyes. “You know that, Michelle. Don’t you?”

  “Yes,” she whispered, squeezing his hand. “I know, Steve.”

  END

  Table of Contents

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