Godforsaken: Book 1 (Shade of Light)

by Suren Hakobyan

  “We’re going into that fog?” the worried words escaped from Lily’s mouth.

  Nobody answered. Raphael raised his hand and stretched out toward the fog.

  “Exhibes,” Raphael hissed in a hushed voice. A bright light rose up from the ground and stood amidst the darkness, dispersing the dim fog.

  Lily, immobilized, looked at the magic going on before her eyes. A huge castle stretched up about half a mile and mingled with the ceiling above. It was lit up by blue lights, as though thousands of projectors were placed around the castle. The ceiling was too high to reach, and the ground was gray like ash, but too solid to be ash in truth.

  Peering around in shock, Lily didn’t notice her feet taking her toward Samael of their own accord.

  “Here we are.” His voice made her jerk back to reality. “Do you remember what I told you?” Receiving no answer, he reminded her. “Stay close to Raphael.”

  She nodded absently. The castle didn’t look ugly, on the contrary, outwardly it had a specific beauty, but Lily remembered Raphael’s words about trying to look deeply. The first look might be an illusion.

  “Let’s go,” Raphael started forward toward the gates on the far end of the pathway.

  Samael looked at Lily severely. With uneasiness in her heart, Lily flinched, and hurried to catch up with the monk. The pathway leading toward the entrance of the huge castle was lit by dim, flame-yellow lights. If Lily wasn’t sure about their heavenly origin, she’d think there were two neon wires pinned to both sides of the pathway.

  Samael walked behind, keeping some distance between him and Lily. Every now and again she peered back at him in hope that he would say something, but Samael seemed to be blind to her.

  They were at the gates when Samael caught up with them. There was a big picture carved on the gates. Looking carefully, Lily recognized the warrior holding a long spear at the throat of a fallen man. Wearing a military uniform, he bore the same look as Raphael did now. Here was the prison Dudael, and the fallen man must be Azazel. She glanced at a notice hung above the picture, but the language was unfamiliar to her.

  “What’s written there?” she whispered to Samael.

  “The one who dares to tread here will be blind and deprived of God’s light forevermore, until the day of the great judgment when he shall be cast into the fire,” Samael translated tonelessly.

  Lily’s heart sunk. “What does it mean? Will we be able to leave this place, Samael?”

  “You have nothing to worry about.” Finally, Samael glanced at her. His eyes were playful, he looked like a child who was on the brink of a new discovery. “This is a warning for Lilith’s offspring, besides, the keeper of the prison himself,” he pointed to Raphael, “is with you. He’ll definitely bring you out of it again, won’t you, Raphael?”

  The monk replied with nothing, keeping his worried gaze on the gates. Most assuredly Raphael recalled the memories, the old times when he had built this prison and tossed the previous keeper of the Garden of Eden into it. Now he was here with the new keeper. Lily wondered how long it had been since he had last been here, but she dared not to break concentration on the gates.

  “What about you, Samael?” Lily murmured after a little while.

  “What about me?”

  “Will you escape from here, too?” Her voice trembled. “What if God realizes you broke the rules?”

  “I have to leave with you,” Samael’s voice became anxious, or at least it seemed that way to Lily. “But even God will agree with me that the rules exist only to be one day broken. If he didn’t believe that, he wouldn’t love the life he created on Earth.”

  “You think God loves people because they sin?” Lily guessed.

  “He loves man because man is unpredictable,” Samael said. “If man followed all rules, life on Earth wouldn’t exist. Man would never have been banished from the Garden of Eden. I told you about the feelings and the danger – sometimes, they show the right way, but you still need to break or bend some rules.”

  “Instinct,” Lily added rapidly.

  The conversation was interrupted by the rough voice of the opening rusty gates. Lily felt adrenaline rushing through her veins. Her heart began hammering as in her mind’s eye she saw the castle’s insides. To her disappointment, there was darkness behind the gates, like nobody was at home.

  The gates hung open and quiet fell. No voices, no wind, nothing. Lily thought she became deaf and rubbed at her ears, but Samael grasped her hand, looking at her severely.

  As her eyes turned toward the gates, she saw a person walking to meet them, holding a torch above the head. The flame lit a narrow passage opposite the gate. Lily looked closely, trying to figure out if the person holding the torch was a human. It wore a black cassock like Raphael in the church, and its face was obscured under the hood, but Lily spotted two flaming eyes.

  It came and stood two steps away from Raphael before it bowed and greeted him.

  “My angel.” It was a dulcet woman’s voice.

  “Succubus,” Raphael greeted back.

  Lily tried to see something else under the hood, but the creature’s face remained in darkness. Only her eyes were flaming. Lily gave up and glanced at the torch. She had never seen such fire before. It was glowing lazily, as if in different, lengthened time, and the flame was mingling with air like a yellow liquid. The creature, holding it, raised its free hand and pushed back its hood. Lily forgot to breathe. A unique beauty stood before Lily’s eyes; curly golden hair spilling out over the cassock’s shoulders, lips plump and cherry red. She saw distinctly flaming-yellow eyes, and a face more beautiful than any she had ever seen before. It was a woman, far too beautiful for such a prison. She looked from Raphael to Samael, whose eyes were piercing into her. They stared at each other for an intimate space of time. Lily gawked from her to Samael, then back at her, and saw Succubus’s face curl into a thin, happy smile.

  “Welcome, Samael,” she said. “It’s been a long time.”

  “A long time for the ones who’re stuck in this prison,” Samael cut her off waspishly. “The time goes by much faster outside,” he teased, his smile sneering.

  “You haven’t changed.” Succubus narrowed her eyes. “My rude mustang.”

  It was clear they had known each other for a long time. Lily felt an incomprehensible envy as she noticed the way Succubus looked at Samael. She was seducing Samael with those eager eyes, she was seducing him with her irresistible look.

  “Accipere eum in,” Raphael ordered, breaking their eye contact. Succubus nodded obediently and gave the monk a bow. Without saying anything, she spun around and started forward into the castle. She hadn’t even noticed Lily. It was as though Lily didn’t exist.

  Lily looked at Samael in puzzlement. In her narrowed eyes an unexplainable anger rose, demanding an explanation, but the unearthly creature ignored her look. He indicated the pathway ahead.

  Lily wheeled around curtly and hurried to catch up with Raphael, who was already about to enter the gates. Samael sighed and made his way after her.

  “Stay close,” Raphael hummed under his breath as she came up beside him. “Try to control yourself and don’t look around too much.”

  Lily nodded involuntarily. She tried to peer back at Samael, but Raphael poked her. “Stay close,” he hissed threateningly.

  With a loud snap, the gates closed behind them, and Lily thought that the ceiling would crash down. She received only a sandy rain. As the gates were closed, the darkness in a hazy corridor laid before them disappeared and was replaced by fire light, but Lily couldn’t find the source.

  The outside silence was replaced by echoes wandering in the corridor – cries, shrieks, moans, groans, hollers. It sounded like people were being tortured in the depths of the castle. The farther they strode into the prison, the louder the voices became. Lily looked around to find where they were coming from. On both sides, endless sandy walls stretched on, along with the unreal flame.

  Raphael and Samael looked unfazed.<
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  “Can you hear the voices?” she hissed to Raphael. The archangel nodded. “What are they?”

  Raphael only looked down at her with his serious eyes. He didn’t reply, but the expression in his eyes told her to be patient, that soon she would figure it out on herself. Lily gulped and looked away.

  Succubus was two steps ahead, holding the torch high above her. She kept looking ahead. Not once had she turned to check if the angels were still following her or not. She obviously wasn’t interested in the guests.

  The wandering sounds grew louder and louder. The passage parted in three in the end, and their guide took them to the right. Lily tried to see something in the other dark corridors, but found nothing, only blackness.

  The journey went on along another corridor – the same sandy walls and solid floor. Lily spotted a doorway somewhere in the distance. She straightened, felt a flutter in her stomach, but her eyes stared strongly at the hole in the wall. With every step it grew closer, and finally she could peek into the room through the doorway.

  A tremor ran over her body and her mouth fell open in horror. She saw a naked woman lying on a bed, her head propped up by the headboard. She looked at Lily with stony eyes. They were empty, carrying no emotion within them. Her long black hair was scattered about her, her hands were lying at her sides. Her breasts were quaking because of the motions of a naked man atop her. As he turned and faced Lily, she saw something like a human, or something that might’ve been human once. Half the skin of his face was ripped, as if a lion had clawed it off, and fresh blood was still dripping down on the woman’s neck. He smiled at Lily wickedly, widening his eyes, and with his long tongue he licked the woman’s skin. Still the black-haired woman’s eyes remained emotionless. She seemed dead. Lily covered her eyes with her hand and opened her mouth to shriek, but her voice refused to come out of her throat.

  Raphael patted on her shoulder. She tried to regain her breath until they reached the next doorway. Now Lily knew what the voices were about: sex. Within every doorway she saw it – three women kissing and licking a huge man sitting on his throne. Then she saw a tall and muscular man standing at a wall as a red-haired woman knelt down before his erection. She took it into her mouth while another man came up to join her.

  The next room held two naked men engaging in intercourse. One had brown frizzy hair and green eyes like Samael’s, tight skin and a handsome face. The other was older, with graying hair, and he stood a little shorter than his lover. The younger glanced at Lily and winked at her, or perhaps at Samael. He looked like a human – his face, his skin, his body – but the expression in his eyes was devilish. Lily didn’t recognize any human emotion in them. His hand passed through the other man’s gray hair, and they kissed eagerly. Lily averted her eyes, but couldn’t help looking into the following rooms.

  The corridor split again. This time Succubus led them into the middle corridor. After ten yards, Lily saw doorways again. Sounds wandering here became more mystical, like some of them were too old and eluded the walls’ memories.

  Every room had different people with different predilections, though Lily wouldn’t call them people – half human, half demons. She saw group sex, saw masochists scratching on each other’s skin, creating words or pictures using sharp knives, or teeth, or long nasty nails. In one room Lily saw a crooning brown-haired woman in the doggy-style position, her face buried in the bed, as a man thrust into her while another man scourged him. His back was all bloody, his skin whipped raw, but he kept thrusting into her and screaming hysterically. The man relished every stroke on his back, he enjoyed the pain and the sex at the same time.

  14. The Angel of Death

  They went through several corridors, but the world around them the same – opened doors, some of them covered by transparent curtains, but all of them lead to the same destination of sex, moans, and cries of pain. There were different faces, but each shared the same inhuman expressions.

  “Where do the other corridors lead to?” she asked Raphael when they chose the leftmost path at the next fork.

  “This is a maze.” the archangel said. “It was created for humans. If they come in through the same gates we did, they will never find the right way back out again.”

  “But how can humans find the way in?” Lily asked, interested. “And who would want to risk being trapped here forever?”

  “There are a lot of people longing for immortality, and they’ll do anything and everything to attain it,” Raphael explained. “Some organizations in different countries find such buyers and bring them here.”

  Lily peeked back at Samael, bewildered. The keeper of Eden was walking unfazed, his hands thrust into his pockets, looking for all the world like he had come to a park for a stroll. Nothing captured his interest, save that he kept looking ahead at Succubus. Lily felt a rush of her blood in her ears. Why didn’t he pay attention to her? She was scared, she needed him now, she wanted his protective arms, but instead, Samael ignored both Lily and Raphael.

  A moment later, Lily jerked under Raphael’s grasp. He had stopped her and pulled her aside. What is wrong? She looked around. Succubus had stopped in front of them, gazing at Samael through Lily, like Lily was merely a ghost wandering in these endless corridors. Lily glanced back at Samael uneasily.

  Succubus paced toward him, and Raphael pushed Lily out of her way. Lily peered at him indignantly.

  “She can’t see us,” the monk said. “Don’t you remember about my powers here? You’re invisible like me.”

  Lily looked at Samael then back at Raphael quickly. “Can’t Samael see us either?”

  “Yes.”

  “But does he know we’re here?”

  “He can’t see us, but he has the power to feel us.”

  Succubus approached Samael and stood in front of him, her gleaming eyes piercing his. Samael regarded her with a playfulness in his green eyes. He did nothing when she closed in on him, to better lean against his chest.

  “The next room is empty. Waiting for us,” she hissed into his face before biting her lip. Samael stood immobile, thinking, deciding whether to take her invitation or reject it.

  “What the…?” Lily cried out angrily and took a step to knock Succubus away, but Raphael grabbed her.

  “We aren’t here, do you remember?” he told her roughly. “You have to stay inconspicuous or else I won’t be able to protect you if they find out Samael isn’t alone.”

  “But she–” Lily pointed ahead, “look at her.”

  “Control your feelings,” Raphael insisted.

  Holding the torch with one hand, Succubus traced her fingers over Samael’s face, then wove her fingers through his hair.

  “Do you remember us?” she asked him in a hushed voice.

  No doubt Samael and Succubus were very familiar with each other, but how close were they? She was inviting Samael into one of the inhuman sex rooms, obviously not to engage in civil conversation.

  “It was a long time ago, Succubus,” Samael replied at last.

  “It’s not a long time for such immortal creatures as we are,” she retorted. “What is time to us? Centuries pass by like seconds.” Succubus exhaled, filling his nose with her hot breath. “I’m not asking you to come back to me like before. Do you remember the days we shared together?” Her eyes gleamed greedily. “The sex we had can’t be forgotten. I’ll risk everything and ask you to have me one more time.” She stepped back and unbuttoned her cassock. It slid down over her body to the floor. The torch illuminated her white skin, and her golden hair was now completely free to stretch down to her waist. Her breasts were tight, her nipples were hard, and Samael’s eyes fell upon them involuntarily. Even Lily couldn’t tear her eyes away from her bare spine and shapely ass, she had the kind of long and slender legs other girls could only dream of. Who had created such a beautiful creation as Succubus and left her in a prison?

  “Take me into that room and fuck me hard, Samael,” she ordered, taking his face into her hands. “I’ve missed yo
u, my mustang.” Her hand slid down between his legs and grasped his erection. “I need you inside me. Satisfy me, Samael.” She stood up on her toes, her mouth reaching up to his chin, and then she licked his neck. She took his hand and put it on her naked rear. “What are you waiting for?” Succubus kissed his lips. “Don’t you want to taste me once again? You can’t visit me every day like before, Samael.”

  Succubus tossed the torch to the ground and ripped Samael’s shirt open, freeing his muscular and irresistible chest. She looked at his skin with hungry eyes, then her mouth attacked him fiercely.

  Lily thought that Samael would succumb to temptation. He tilted his head back, letting her lick his neck and enjoy the taste of his skin that Lily liked the most, but then he gathered himself and resisted her advances. His green eyes darkened and became stoic when he looked back at her again. He took her by her shoulders and rudely pushed her away.

  “Put your clothes on and lead me in,” he said severely. “I’m on business here.”

  For some seconds Succubus stood stunned. Now Lily recognized Samael again. Succubus had the same expression as Samael had had in the car the day they first met, when Lily had managed to refuse him. That expression meant Succubus had never been rejected before, Samael was the first to push her flawless body away.

  Succubus laughed loudly. Her voice filled in the corridor and got lost in the infinity of it.

  “You know that I can leave you here, and you’ll roam in search of the exit forever,” she said jovially, but her voice was colored with a new kind of anger. “Do you think Raphael will come to save you, keeper of Eden?” She took a step closer to him and put her fingers on his chest. “I like your raging eyes,” she hissed. “Do you remember how many souls you’ve destroyed for me? How many arms have been raised against you because of my charm?”

  “Your charm has no power on me anymore, Succubus,” Samael said tonelessly. He took her hands off his chest. “I won’t touch you, even if you leave me in these corridors forevermore. You’d better get dressed and lead me ahead.”