Last Chance (DarkWorld: SkinWalker Book 3)

by Ayer, T. G.

  But not one of them would ever ask me directly. I still stood apart from the Walkers I’d been raised among, and even knowing the reason didn’t ease the niggle of unhappiness inside my heart. Half-breed. That’s what they were all thinking. But if that mattered to me, then I’d have to question my loyalty to Mom, something I simply wasn’t capable of.

  I shifted in my seat and studied my friends. A Fae, a Djinn, a Fire Mage, and a lynx Walker. What an interesting circle of friends I’d joined to my heart. It wasn’t often that Corin Odel’s house contained this many non-Walkers, and I knew this time tomorrow, the Tukats’ gossip mill would be having a field day.

  I felt the heat of the fire on my right, my cheek now uncomfortably hot. My fingers fiddled with crumbs and the oily tissue that remained on the empty plate on my lap. Lily and Tara were talking in low voices beside me, and I caught snatches of their conversation. Something about a jamming safety lock and poison bullets that got repeatedly stuck in the chamber. Salem and Logan sat on the couch opposite me, seemingly in deep conversation. But even while he interacted with the Djinn, Logan never stopped watching me with those deliciously dark eyes. He caught my gaze and gave me a small smile, and I understood his reluctance to come too close to me. The Tukats community wasn’t without their own prejudices, and I knew despite the well-meaning words and polite social behavior, my friends would have been given the whole outsider treatment. And Logan wouldn’t do anything to make it worse for me. I was gripped by the urge to grab him and kiss him senseless right in front of all the prying eyes and judgmental gazes.

  But I maintained control of my urges and got to my feet. “You guys want some fresh air?”

  They rose in unison, and I hid a smile. They were as eager as I was to get out of the room, now suffocating with heat and curiosity. Heads turned, drawn to our sudden movement. Dad looked up from a conversation with Iain. They both stood beside the fire, the golden light dancing on their fair hair. Our little family was now balanced between the dark-haired and the light. I blinked, pulling myself up short. What a horrible thing to think about right now. All the stress of Greer’s death and the funeral must be turning my brain to mush.

  I stuck a thumb in the direction of the patio doors and they both nodded. They knew where I would take my little party.

  I headed to the glass doors, unlatching one and walking out into the sunshine. The afternoon was cooler now despite the warmth of the sun. Nobody spoke as I hurried out onto the lawn. A little gazebo sat at least a hundred yards from the house. Painted white, it was octagonal in shape, with four thresholds and four windows. A pillar marked each point of the eight sides and was now overgrown with a creeping white rose. Little white buds peeked out from the sea of green leaves and branches. Once inside, we all burst out laughing. The space wasn’t big enough to fit five adults all standing.

  I sighed and sank onto the nearest window seat. “This used to be my most favorite place in all the world.”

  “I can see why,” said Lily as she took one of the seats opposite me. The strong warmth beside me made me want to smile. Logan sat next to me, his long legs stretched out in front of him. There was barely enough space on the seat to fit two people, but we seemed to manage well enough. Lily stared around at the creeping roses and the flaking paint. “Did your dad build this for you?”

  I shook my head and almost bumped my forehead on Logan’s chin. “No. This place was built for Greer. When she was six, she wanted a tree house. Dad, of course, was reluctant, but Mom had liked the idea. Eventually, they came to a compromise. A gazebo would do just as well, where it was nice and safe on the ground. But Greer was the only one who wasn’t satisfied. She was never the compromise sort, and once it had been built, she barely gave it a glance. It eventually became the place I would go to have a quiet moment. Somewhere I could hide away with a book.”

  The day Mom left, I’d been reading in the gazebo, a daisy-chain crown draped on my head. I’d heard a door slam and glanced up to see Mom getting into her car. Dad was standing on the porch, his hands hanging at his sides as if he had no idea what to do with them. The look on his face had chilled my blood, and when I looked back at Mom, I’d known something was wrong. Her eyes gleamed with tears and she’d swiped at them roughly before peering down at the keyhole to start the engine. Once she’d gunned the engine, she released the brake and drove off without a backward glance. The wheels had skidded, spitting gravel, and I remembered the empty clacking sound of the stones as they were thrown around in the wake of the disappearing vehicle. Later, I remembered wondering if that had really been the sound of the stones. Because I was sure it was the sound of my heart shattering.

  “So how you holding up?” asked Logan softly.

  I glanced at him, met his eyes, and smiled. I wanted to run my hands along his cheek, to hold him and thank him for being so kind and attentive. “I’m fine. Really, I am.” I fell into silence, my thoughts returning to Greer. It wasn’t as if we were ever as close as sisters should be. Logan shifted and I looked up. From the looks of all the faces around me, I knew what had happened. “I said that aloud, didn’t I?”

  Saleem’s eyes twinkled, and both Lily and Tara nodded. Tara had an odd look in her eye, as if she were worried about me but was trying not to get too suffocating with her concern.

  I raised my eyes at Tara in question, and her features relaxed a little. “Kai, you do know you don’t have to have a close relationship with a family member to mourn them.” I nodded. “Because that’s what I think you’re doing. You’re stopping yourself from mourning her because you think you have no right. Because you weren’t close or because you were so different from each other or because you never clicked.”

  I sighed and leaned against Logan. “I know, but somehow I seem to keep doing it to myself. Even when I feel like crying, I just feel like a fraud. Why do I deserve to cry for a sister who I never really cared for?”

  “But was that really all that true?” asked Logan as he gave me a squeeze. I craned my neck to look at his face. “You said in the end it seemed almost as if she cared. And maybe she always had, just never really knew how to show it. Just because you didn’t have the perfect-world relationship doesn’t mean you weren’t sisters. She was your family. And now she’s gone and it’s okay to mourn her. Nobody will judge you for it.”

  I stiffened a little, but Logan didn’t move away. I didn’t want him to either. He was right. They were all right. I’d been doing this to myself all along. Making myself feel like I had no right to mourn her loss. Missing her or reminiscing about good times would be a lie. But mourning her wasn’t. “Why does everything that goes on in my head have to be so darned complicated?”

  “Because your name is Kailin Odel.” Saleem spoke, his face gleaming with a smile. For the briefest moment, I thought I saw tattoos along his eyes and forehead, dark markings creeping along his neck and throat and disappearing into the neckline of his shirt. I blinked and they were gone. And I would have thought it was all just my imagination had it not been for the look he gave me. A knowing look.

  I blinked. Was he using a glamor to hide his markings?

  Not that it was any of my business what he showed to the world and what he didn’t. But I still had unfinished business with the gorgeous Djinn. We’d never discussed his strange need to collect Blue Stones while we were in the Greylands. I made a mental note to speak to him about that. But for now, I needed to just relax.

  ***

  When Logan and the gang left, they were followed closely by the rest of the visitors. I found the house quiet. Too quiet. I wandered back inside, heading upstairs to my old room, and ended up on the window seat, inhaling the mustiness of old curtains and carpets. Seemed Dad hadn’t brought himself to redecorate. Sometimes I wondered what it did to him to live in this big old house, missing more than half his family. There were times when I could totally understand the icy cage he’d locked his emotions in all these years.

  I leaned my forehead against the window and sighed, s
taring out at the garden, where the trees grew dark and gloomy now in the blush of evening.

  “It’s not all that bad, is it?” a voice broke into my reverie. I jerked my gaze to the intruder so fast my neck snapped and my heart gave an uncomfortable thud.

  Justin Lake stood in the doorway, a lazy smile on his face. He was leaning against the threshold, his arms folded, the thin cotton of his shirt stretched tight over bulging muscles. He watched me, golden eyes observant, not missing a thing. Then he blinked as if some thought had caught him short. “Not that I’m making light of Greer’s death.” His expression was apologetic, and I knew he meant it. With Justin, you trusted what you saw.

  I tilted my head toward him and nodded, unsure if I should get up and take him back downstairs or remain seated. Justin always had the ability to fill a room with his presence. And here alone in my bedroom, he made me decidedly uncomfortable.

  I gave him a weak smile and an equally half-hearted shrug. “It’s okay. I know you weren’t.”

  “She was pretty troubled.” His statement filled the room, and I wanted to do something like knock on wood or throw salt over my shoulder because I wasn’t convinced that talking ill of the dead wasn’t bad luck.

  “She had her moments.” I laughed, seeing images of Greer sneering in the Greylands when she controlled the Deadland demons, bleeding after Brand had sliced her up, apologizing before disappearing into the light. “She certainly didn’t do things by half.”

  Justin chuckled, then strode into the room. He had an air of dangerous power about him, like a threatening cat waiting to pounce, waiting to kill. He headed for the bed and sat on the corner of my mattress as if it were the most natural thing in the world. As if he weren’t alone with another woman in her bedroom.

  The cougar hunched and placed his elbows on his knees, leaning over. He stared at the carpet for a while, linking his fingers, sitting there deep in thought as if he owned the place. It grated on my nerves a bit, more probably because I wanted him out of my room, away from me. Being alone with Justin was asking for trouble.

  Only when I was about to ask him what he wanted did he lift his head to speak, as if anticipating the question. “I’d like to discuss something with you.” His voice rolled over me like honey, thick and delicious. I blinked against the alpha effect and concentrated harder, watching him, the way the muscles in his shoulders bunched, the way his jaw tightened, granite hard.

  And I wondered if I was going to like what he had to say.

  He cleared his throat, then held my gaze. “I’m not sure how to say this.”

  “Take a deep breath and let me have it,” I said, giving him an encouraging smile, all while something pinged inside—the warning he was probably right and I should rein myself in if the urge came over me to toss him out on his sexy ass.

  He obeyed and said, “I’m concerned… I hope you’re not going to be making a decision you’ll regret.”

  Immediately I bristled, staring at him. My own shoulders tightened as I held his gaze. “What’s that supposed to mean?” Who was Justin to wonder about my decisions? I would have asked him, but I’d noticed how difficult it had been for him to speak in the first place, and now I really wanted to know what he’d intended to say.

  He cleared his throat. The fingers twisted, then loosened. “Okay, I know this is going to piss you off, but I don’t have any way of avoiding it.” He fell silent for a moment. “This Logan Westin you’re seeing…” I said nothing, just waited as my blood began to simmer. “Do you really think it’s wise?” he asked, concern darkening his eyes.

  I fisted my hands and made a concerted effort to keep my fury in check. “Is it any of your business?” I pushed the words past the tight anger in my throat.

  Justin lifted his head, meeting my eyes dead on with his brilliant golden gaze. “It is when it concerns an alpha.”

  “Did Iain send you?” I folded my arms, my body moving from relaxed to aware. Justin was sending of waves of power, confidence, and control. None of which made me in any way agreeable to him or his line of conversation.

  “What?” Justin’s brow furrowed and he looked momentarily confused. Then he shook his head, a little annoyance leaking into his gaze. “No, Iain has nothing to do with this conversation.”

  I believed him, but I waited a moment while I gathered my thoughts. “Justin, what is it you want?” All I wanted was to have this conversation over and done with, but it didn’t seem my desires were up for consideration.

  “I just wanted to tell you I think you’re making a mistake. And I think you can do a whole lot better than Westin.”

  There, he’d said it. I’d suspected that was where he’d been heading, yet all the while, a part of me had hoped he wouldn’t. My eyes narrowed and anger flared in my veins. “Really?” I asked, getting to my feet. My hands vibrated with anger.

  Justin rose from the mattress and held out his hands, although supplication was the last thing I would think he was capable of. His attempt to placate me fell flat, just like his little attempt to stick his nose in my business. “Look, don’t get all hot-headed about it. All I’m doing is saying my piece,” he said, giving me a short shrug, as if he thought I wouldn’t figure out something bigger was going on here. He wouldn’t have opened his mouth, especially when he knew I’d bite his head off, if he didn’t have a good enough reason. And mere concern didn’t cut it.

  My spine tightened as I said, “Well, now that you’ve said it, you can leave.” I folded my arms and gritted my teeth. I waited a few moments for him to vacate the room, but not once did I expect him to. And true to my gut, all he did was sit there watching me with those alluring honey eyes. I lifted my chin. “Fine. If you won’t, I will.”

  I stalked to the door, my back ramrod straight as I tried to contain my anger. The audacity. “Just because you’re an alpha doesn’t give you the right to interfere in my life,” I said over my shoulder as I moved past him. I would have said more, but a warm hand grabbed hold of my elbow, setting my skin tingling. I’d always been half in love with Justin, but now was the worst time for that attraction to rear its ugly head.

  He spun me around to face him. I opened my mouth to tell him where to get off, but I didn’t get the chance to get a word out. He curled his arm around me, placing a hot palm at the base of my waist, and pulled me against him. My body remained stiff and I meant to struggle for a way out of his grip, but he was strong, not to mention the thought of struggling had disappeared entirely from my mind.

  We stood there for a moment, heated skin sizzling against each other from chest to hips. I was sure it was my anger, but I knew it was probably something a little more passionate for him. Justin had always felt things to their fullest. His eyes blazed, but I didn’t get a chance to look at them too long. His head descended and he kissed me. Caught off guard, I wasn’t sure how to react.

  Certainly not by kissing him back.

  His lips sent sparks of heat racing up and down my spine, and my panther purred. The moment I felt myself liking it too much was the moment I shoved him away.

  I took precious seconds to catch my breath and then I glared at him, my eyes narrow and all panther. “I get it. You want Logan out of my life because you want me for yourself.”

  He shrugged. “I can’t deny that.”

  “The question is, why? Is this some alpha power play? Marry the daughter of an alpha and gain power over another clan?”

  He shook his head, his eyes going dark. “No, Kai. You know that’s not the case.”

  “I don’t know anything,” I said through gritted teeth. “You proposition me out of the blue. What do you expect me to think?”

  “I didn’t proposition you.”

  “Justin, this kind of dominance went out with the dark ages. You can’t just force yourself on me.”

  “It didn’t feel like I was forcing you. I kissed. You kissed back.” His attitude was nonchalant, and he had a point.

  I blushed, unable to deny that charge. “That’s irre
levant. And don’t go getting any ideas. I’m in a relationship with Logan. And I’m not interested in you that way. You’ve known that for a long time.” I glared at him and shook my head, hardly believing his audacity.

  “Why? Because of Sonia?” He met my eyes and held them, intent on seeing my reaction to his question as if he’d also be able to see into my soul.

  I shook my head. But I had to admit the ghost of his sister did stand between us. His sister, my brother’s wife. Killed by Logan. I blinked, fear flitting through my stomach. Justin would go berserk if he ever found that out. I thrust the thought away and concentrated on the cougar in front of me.

  “Then what’s standing between us?” he asked as if he genuinely wanted to know.

  “Apart from the fact my heart is elsewhere you mean? You’re an alpha, and the last thing I need is to get involved in that political game again. That’s the very reason I left, and you know what? I’m very, very happy with my life right now. I have my own responsibilities to think about, and I’m happy if it just stays that way.”

  “So you won’t even consider it?” His nerve never failed to amaze me.

  “What’s to consider?” I asked, lifting my chin. I didn’t want to look into his eyes.

  With a hand beneath my chin, he lifted my face and I was forced to look directly into his golden eyes. Then he leaned forward and kissed me again. This time he deepened the kiss, and I kissed him back just as passionately. When I found myself leaning into him, icy reality washed over me and I jerked away, shocked at my wanton response.