The Playboy's Proposal

by Amanda Browning

  ‘I’m not going to allow that to happen again, Kathryn.’

  She nodded and licked her lips, wondering if he was aware of all he had said. That he had loved once. She doubted it. Nor would she tell him. She would simply hold on to the thought of it, for what had once happened could happen again. ‘That’s understandable.’

  Sighing, he returned to her, this time sitting down on the edge of the bed. ‘I’m usually very careful about using protection, but you have the knack of driving every sane and sensible thought out of my mind. Now you could be pregnant, and, if you are, I want you to promise me that you won’t get rid of it.’

  Frowning to keep back emotional tears, Kathryn cupped her hand to his cheek and looked him squarely in the eye. ‘I’ve already told you I would never do that, but, if it helps, I give you my word.’

  Joel closed his eyes for a moment, and she could only imagine what sort of devil he must have been fighting with. ‘You’d tell me if you were pregnant? We may be in the twenty-first century, but I believe a child should be brought up knowing both its parents.’

  ‘I believe that, too,’ Kathryn agreed, and, because she couldn’t bear to sit there feeling his pain and doing nothing, she cast her arms around his neck and held him close. ‘If it happens, I promise to tell you. I would never deny you your child,’ she whispered, voice thick with suppressed emotion. Loving him, she could never think of doing that to him. Especially knowing what had happened before. When his arms lifted and encircled her, she closed her eyes tightly, emotions threatening to choke her.

  ‘Thank you,’ he said gruffly, and her soft laugh held the faint echo of a sob. ‘I’m sorry if I hurt you, but I could only see history repeating itself. I should have known better. I know you’re not like her. You’re a good woman, Kathryn Templeton.’

  Right then she would have given everything she possessed to have been able to tell him she loved him, that he could trust her, but it wasn’t possible. All she could cling to was the fact that at least he had told her about his fiancée. It was something Agnes had said he never talked about. Maybe he had been driven to it by circumstances, but it was another tiny prop to shore up her heart.

  Even as she held him, one tiny corner of her mind couldn’t help wondering if she could be pregnant. As he had said, it was possible. A part of her hoped she was, for if she couldn’t have him, at least she could have a part of him to love and care for. Yet it would change things. He hadn’t mentioned marriage, and if he should suggest it could she go into it loving him as she did and knowing he would not allow himself to love her? That the marriage was only for the sake of the child? She honestly didn’t know. She could only make that kind of decision if and when the time came.

  ‘Now will you come back to bed?’ she asked again, wanting to distract both Joel and herself from a subject that was too painful, and she felt the laugh rumble up from deep inside him.

  ‘Are you sure you want me to?’ he charged wryly, looking down at her.

  ‘I don’t have to get up for work, so I can catch up on my sleep later,’ she told him impishly, and he grinned wolfishly.

  ‘We aren’t going to sleep?’

  Kathryn held on to his robe as she allowed herself to sink back to the pillows. ‘I’m not in the least bit tired. Are you?’

  Joel followed her down, his lips hovering above hers. ‘Now that you come to mention it…’ he murmured, and kissed her.

  Kathryn closed her eyes and kissed him back.

  CHAPTER EIGHT

  FOR Kathryn, the next few weeks passed in a blur. She was so happy she felt sure she wore a permanent smile on her face. They saw each other every day. Sometimes they went out, more often they stayed in, simply enjoying each other’s company. To begin with Joel occasionally stayed over at her place, but as time went on more often than not they ended up at his house. Soon Kathryn took to leaving some clothes there, in case she had to go to an early meeting and there was no chance of going home first. Eventually, as more and more of her things ended up in his house, she was virtually living with him and only working from her own home.

  Life was as close to idyllic as she could want it. The only small cloud on the horizon had been the recent discovery that she wasn’t pregnant after all. When she’d told Joel, some emotion had flickered in his eyes. Relief? Regret? She couldn’t be sure—it had gone too quickly for her to identify it. Nevertheless, their passion for each other had not diminished. In fact it had seemed to deepen, so that the more they made love, the stronger their need for each other became—although Joel never forgot to use protection. Her head knew he was right, but her heart wished it could have been otherwise, that he would one day want more from her. Even so, she kept telling him she loved him, although he was always asleep and never heard her.

  Kathryn made a point of not looking ahead, but taking each day as it came. She knew she was living in a false sense of security. It was only a matter of time before her family discovered who she was seeing, and she knew that when that happened the full weight of family censure would fall on her head. Because they loved her, and they would feel there was no future for her with Joel. His reputation spoke for itself. Sometimes she felt as if she was holding her breath, waiting for the axe to fall.

  It fell, as often happens, when it was least expected.

  The telephone rang one Tuesday when Kathryn was working on a particularly complicated program for one of her new customers. She answered its persistent ring with an irritated sigh at having forgotten to switch the answering machine on, thus preventing this kind of interruption.

  ‘Kathryn Templeton. How can I help you?’

  ‘I can think of several ways you can help me, sweetheart, but they’d probably get us arrested,’ Joel’s sexy tones came down the line and curled her toes. Her irritation vanished like mist in sunlight.

  Relaxing back against her chair, she laughed. ‘Hmm, sounds interesting. What did you have in mind?’

  ‘If I told you, you’d never get any work done this afternoon, and neither would I, so I think I’ll save it till later,’ he replied seductively, and Kathryn gave a tiny shiver of anticipation.

  ‘I’ll look forward to it. So, why are you calling?’

  ‘Does there have to be a reason? Maybe I just like the sound of your voice,’ he told her softly, and her heart skipped a beat.

  ‘Do you? Like the sound of my voice?’ she asked throatily. ‘Because I can’t tell you what yours is doing to me right now.’

  ‘Let me tell you something, Kathryn,’ Joel returned confidentially. ‘Your voice… Well, I’ll just say that in certain circumstances, when I think of it, it can be downright distracting.’

  Kathryn chuckled. ‘Good. I like the sound of you being distracted.’

  ‘I had a feeling you’d say that.’

  ‘I try not to disappoint you,’ she teased, and grinned when she heard him groan.

  ‘This conversation is going to play merry hell with my afternoon. I don’t know how I’m going to concentrate,’ he murmured, with more than a hint of laughter in his voice.

  Kathryn twined the telephone cord round her fingers and smiled up at the ceiling. ‘I’d suggest a cold shower, but remembering what happened the last time you tried it…’ She left the sentence hanging, and knew he was recalling yesterday morning, when she had joined him in the shower and, rather than cooling off, their temperatures had soared. One thing had led to another, and he had been late for work when he’d left the house.

  ‘You’ll pay for that, sweetheart,’ he promised, and she laughed softly.

  ‘I thought I already had, and I enjoyed every minute of it. You never did tell me what your secretary said when you finally got to your office.’

  ‘She asked if I was unwell. I told her it was just temporary insanity. It’s you I have to thank for the majority of my staff giving me very strange looks,’ Joel complained. ‘They don’t say anything, but I know they think you’re having a very deleterious effect on me.’

  Her brows rose. �
�I don’t see why. I’m hardly the first woman in your life, nor the last.’ As ever, she made a joke of it, but it wasn’t getting any easier to say. She was in way too deep to escape from this unscathed, but it was a price she was willing to pay.

  ‘No,’ he agreed. ‘But you are the first one who’s ever made me late for work. Do you realise I’ve had to rearrange more meetings in the last few weeks than in the last ten years?’

  It was some comfort to know their relationship was different enough from the others to raise comment. ‘Are you sorry?’

  ‘The hell of it is, I’m not,’ he told her, in a strange tone of voice which made her wish she could see him and read his expression. Right now it seemed important to know what he was really thinking. It was extremely frustrating to be on the end of a telephone line. ‘Frankly, I’d rather be with you than in some stuffy boardroom, and that’s not like me at all. Sometimes I think you must be a witch.’

  ‘What kind of witch? The kind who turns you into a mouldy old toad, or the kind who puts a spell on you to bind you to her for ever?’ Oh, if there only were such a spell! She’d use it quick as winking.

  ‘The second one, naturally,’ Joel came back, and she could hear his amusement.

  Her smile faded, because she would give anything to believe he really felt more for her than just desire. It was no joke to her, yet she forced her voice to be light. ‘And are you bound to me forever?’ Say yes, her heart begged silently. Say yes.

  ‘Of course. I’m your devoted slave,’ Joel responded laconically, and her heart ached with disappointment. ‘There isn’t anything I wouldn’t do for you,’ he added, and it was salt to the wound, for the one thing she wanted he would never do. He would never give her his heart.

  ‘Be careful, I just might hold you to that,’ she warned through a tight throat, but he didn’t appear to notice and merely laughed.

  ‘Do you think that will make me renege?’

  ‘Most men would.’

  ‘I’m not most men. Haven’t you figured that out for yourself? I’m made of stronger stuff. Try me.’

  ‘I don’t know, you’d probably wriggle out of it somehow,’ she goaded.

  ‘Now you malign my honour. I’m going to have to demand that you put me to the test,’ Joel retorted, sounding very much on his dignity, though she didn’t miss the smile in his voice.

  Her own smile returned. ‘OK, I will, but I’ll have to think of something worthy. I’ll get back to you on it.’

  ‘Make it as difficult as you like,’ he offered, and she grinned.

  ‘Oh, believe me, I will. Now, are you going to tell me why you really called. Because if not, I’ve got work to do,’ she charged him.

  ‘You’re a hard woman.’

  Kathryn laughed. ‘I’m going to put the phone down now,’ she threatened sweetly.

  ‘OK, you win. Slip yourself into something sexy and meet me here at seven tonight. I have a surprise for you. Don’t be late,’ he warned, and before she could get her wits together to respond he had rung off, and she was left staring at the receiver.

  She returned it to the rest with a faint little sigh. Joel could be the most aggravating man, but Lord, how she loved him! Now she would be wondering all afternoon just what the surprise was, and he would know it. But she would pay him back. He had given her the opportunity with that dare, and all she had to do was think up something really devilish. Having to fight four brothers all her life meant she had the best training to do it.

  By seven that evening, Kathryn was riding up in the lift to the top floor of the modern office block that housed Joel’s corporate headquarters. She had been here a few times before, and had been passed in with a smile and word of greeting by the security man on the door. The offices were empty as she walked the corridors to his office. His secretary had gone home long since, but the office door was ajar and she pushed it open quietly.

  Joel was seated at a large desk, his head lowered as he studied some paperwork. As she watched he rolled his head to ease out the kinks before concentrating once more. A peculiar little lump lodged itself in her chest as she resisted the urge to go to him and simply hold him to take away the stresses and strains of the day. Yet she couldn’t let it pass unremarked upon either.

  ‘You work too hard,’ she pronounced as she walked into the room, and Joel glanced up, a smile curving his lips and tweaking her heart. He closed the folder immediately and rose to come round and meet her.

  ‘I have to make up the time I lost thinking of you during the day somehow,’ he told her wryly, and pulled her into his arms. Kathryn raised her head to receive his kiss. It was languorous and deeply possessive, as if he were stamping his brand on her, and she wondered if he realised it. Not that it necessarily meant anything. He was probably the same way with all his women. Which reminded her unnecessarily that she only had him on a temporary basis.

  A thought she resolutely blocked out as he raised his head and looked down at her, a possessive gleam in his eye. He allowed his gaze to rove over the discreet black dress she was wearing and nodded approvingly. ‘Very nice.’

  ‘Sexy enough?’ she charged mockingly.

  ‘You’d be sexy in a sack, but I’ve got to admit, less is definitely more,’ he confided gruffly, referring to the fact that the dress showed very little bare flesh. ‘My imagination can fill in the rest, and it’s doing a grand job. Perhaps we ought to go home.’

  ‘Oh, no!’ Kathryn refused, placing her hands on his chest. ‘Not before you give me the surprise you promised me.’

  He sighed heavily. ‘I suppose you’re going to insist on it?’

  ‘Absolutely. So give.’

  Slipping an arm across her shoulders, he steered her to the door, switching off the light as he went. ‘I just happen to have in my pocket tickets to the opening of the new Turner exhibition.’

  Kathryn’s head turned as if it were on a swivel. ‘But I thought it was invitation only,’ she exclaimed.

  ‘It is, but I managed to wangle an invitation. However, we don’t have to go if you’d rather not,’ he teased, and she reached up quickly and kissed him.

  ‘Thank you.’ She adored Turner, and had been disappointed not to be able to go to the opening. She had said as much to Joel, and now he had conjured up tickets. Was it any wonder she loved him so much, when he did something thoughtful like that?

  ‘Come along, we don’t want to be late.’ He urged her to the lift. ‘You can thank me properly later.’

  The exhibition was as wonderful as she had expected, and Kathryn wandered around on Joel’s arm, a barely touched glass of white wine in her hand. She didn’t notice the speculative looks she received from time to time, from people who recognised Joel and knew his reputation. Not until they literally bumped into an acquaintance of his who was clearly somewhat the worse for wear.

  ‘Joel. Good to see you, old man,’ he greeted effusively, with a public school accent, pumping Joel’s hand as if he expected to get water out of it. ‘What happened to the blonde I saw you with at Gstaad? Got to ask you, old chap. Was she more fun?’ he queried with a loud laugh and a knowing wink.

  Joel retrieved his hand with a faint grimace. ‘You’re drunk, Marcus, or you’d see I’m not alone,’ he said with a haughtiness Kathryn had never heard before. Glancing up at him, she could see what the other man couldn’t: a frostiness in his eyes which promised trouble.

  ‘Oops, sorry. This the new filly?’ Marcus carried on regardless, giving Kathryn the once over with a repulsive leer. ‘She’s a looker, but you always did manage to snap up the best ones.’ He reached out a podgy hand towards Kathryn, but it was anyone’s guess what he might have been going to do, for in flash Joel’s hand had shot out and grasped the other man’s wrist, holding it in a vice-like grip, preventing the move being completed.

  ‘Keep your hands to yourself, Marcus,’ he warned in a soft but deadly tone of voice that made the other man blink. ‘You’d be well advised to go home and sleep this off.’

  Kathryn
thought it good advice as she glanced around uncomfortably. Thankfully, they were in a relatively quiet corner and the incident had gone unnoticed so far. Unfortunately, the man didn’t take the hint.

  ‘I’m not drunk, old chap, just well-lub-lubricated.’ He grinned vacuously.

  Joel’s corresponding smile was grim. ‘You’re…lubricated…enough to insult this lady.’

  Too far gone to exercise caution, Marcus snorted. ‘Lady? When did you get to be so nice?’ he charged as Kathryn’s cheeks started to burn with embarrassed heat.

  A nerve began to tick in Joel’s jaw, so tight was he clenching it. ‘Apologise, Marcus, or, so help me, I’ll lay you out cold right here,’ he threatened, and this time the message got through.

  ‘OK, OK!’ Marcus said hastily. ‘I didn’t realise I was stepping on your toes. I guess this one is special, eh?’ He looked at Kathryn speculatively. ‘I don’t recall what I said, but I apologise if I upset you, Miss…?’ He left that hanging, and Joel was quick to step in.

  ‘Say goodnight, Marcus,’ he urged, releasing the man’s wrist. Marcus looked from one to the other, mumbled something which could have been goodnight, and hurried away.

  Kathryn wasn’t sorry to see him go. ‘A friend of yours?’ she asked sardonically, but Joel didn’t smile.

  ‘Not any longer,’ he said coldly, and she glanced at him curiously as they strolled on.

  ‘Would you really have hit him?’ she couldn’t help but ask.

  ‘He was asking for it. People shouldn’t drink if they can’t hold their liquor,’ Joel went on repressively, and Kathryn was left in a state of bemusement.

  Nobody but her brothers had ever defended her so staunchly before, and they had a reason. She was their sister, and nobody was going to hurt her by word or by deed. She was nothing to Joel but a temporary lover, and yet he had come to her defence before she had even realised she was being offended. Her heart lurched. There was a name for that kind of response, and according to Joel the emotion didn’t exist. It was a stunning thought. She wouldn’t give it that name either, but could he care more for her than he was prepared to admit?