No Limits (No Shame Series Book 2)

by Nora Phoenix

“So how are you going to find Indy?” Noah changed the topic.

  “I can’t use any traditional methods, like putting out a bolo for his car or driver’s license since that would leave a trace in the system others could track.” Connor’s face was pensive. “My first step, I guess, is to find a safe way to contact the Boston DA and ask him to affirm my story. That way, if we find Indy, at least he’ll be certain I’m not out to screw him.”

  11

  They’d fallen asleep almost instantly as soon as they had undressed and cuddled up in bed. No wonder, it had most certainly been an exhausting day, though a satisfying one as well.

  Holy crap, the images of Josh draped over Connor’s knee, that strong hand coming down on his ass. Connor fucking the living daylights out of him. Josh kept playing them in his head as he took off the bed sheets in the master bedroom and walked them over to the washing machine. He’d never experienced anything like it. It was like he was born to be with Connor, like his body was made to accommodate his. Though in all honesty, his ass did still sting a bit. No wonder with that pounding he took.

  He added detergent and fabric softener and turned the machine on. At least Noah would have a clean bed when he came home. Whenever that was. With the infection still in his system, he wouldn’t be leaving the hospital anytime soon. It could be a week, they’d said, maybe even longer.

  Josh had worried about being by himself and what that would do to him, but Connor hadn’t even hesitated. He’d asked Noah if he could move in temporarily to take care of Josh, and Noah had gladly accepted. It should make Josh feel weak that he needed this, that two men were so focused on taking care of him, but it didn’t. Instead, it made him feel loved. Safe. And wanted.

  He and Connor had shared a quick breakfast this morning before Connor had booted up his laptop. He’d taken some clean clothes and personal stuff from his apartment before they’d gone back to the hospital, including his laptop. Josh could’ve monitored him constantly, but what was the point now? Indy was gone, and besides, Josh had no doubt about Connor’s intentions.

  Josh was on his way to clean the master bathroom when the doorbell rang. His heart jumped up with joy. Indy!

  He all but ran down the stairs, only to come to a full stop. A tall, lanky man stood outside, his face hidden by a faded Orioles cap, but Josh would recognize him anywhere. What the fuck was Aaron doing here?

  Connor stepped up behind him and took a quick look outside. “You know him?”

  Josh sighed. “Yeah.”

  He opened the door. Aaron looked up, and Josh's breath stopped. Aaron sported a blackened eye, a thick, bloodied lip, and a bruised and swollen face. Holy crap, he’d been worked over good.

  “What the fuck happened to you?”

  “Hi, Josh. Can I please come in?” Aaron’s voice was hesitant.

  Josh threw the door open wide and gestured. With careful steps that indicated more injuries, Aaron came inside—stopping abruptly when he saw Connor.

  “Aaron, this is my boyfriend Connor. Connor, my brother Aaron.”

  To his credit, Connor didn’t even blink, merely shook Aaron’s hand carefully. Had he even told Connor he had a brother? Josh wasn’t sure. He might’ve, but then again, his family wasn’t exactly a priority to him, so who the fuck knew.

  Minutes later, they were seated in the living room—Aaron lowering himself ever so gently onto one of the chairs, with Josh and Connor hip to hip on the couch.

  “What the fuck is going on? What happened?” Josh asked.

  Aaron didn’t meet his eyes, but kept staring at the floor. “I got beaten up.”

  “That much I surmised myself, genius. But by whom and why? And what the hell are you doing here in the first place?”

  Josh knew he didn’t exactly sound friendly, but then again he wasn’t feeling magnanimous. It wasn’t like Aaron and him had been close. Sure, as kids they had been tight—the two years separating them ensured they’d played a lot together. But after Josh had come out as gay? Aaron had sided solidly with his parents and had barely even talked to his older brother. And when he had, it had been to spew anti-gay sentiments and recriminations.

  “Mom and Dad kicked me out,” Aaron said, meeting Josh's eyes for the first time.

  “What?” Josh shook his head in disbelief. Aaron, the golden boy, had been kicked out? What the fuck? “Why? I can’t see you doing anything so horrific that would warrant their hate. Surely they keep all of their loathing stored up for me, their heathen, perverse son.”

  Aaron hesitated. “I’ve been living on my own for a while, but I lost my job, and it’s been hard.”

  Josh's eyes narrowed. Something was off. He might not have been close to his brother for a long time, but he knew him, and something was different. Aaron had always been a brash, arrogant little shit after Josh had come out, and their parents had blatantly favored him. But now he was much more subdued, vulnerable. Broken, even. What had happened?

  “I’m sorry to hear that, but it doesn’t answer my question. Why did they kick you out? And what made you get over your disgust of your gay brother to show up here?”

  Nope, still not friendly, and he wasn’t a bit sorry. Karma really was a bitch, wasn’t it?

  Aaron took a long time to answer, his eyes looking everywhere but at Josh and Connor. “I’m gay,” he finally whispered.

  Josh froze. Certainly he misheard. There was no way… “You’re what? What did you say?”

  Aaron’s eyes traveled up, met Josh's dead on. “I’m gay,” he repeated, firmer this time.

  Gay.

  My conceited, judgmental little brother who bullied me mercilessly for being gay, who sided with my parents against me every single time, is gay.

  Holy fuck.

  He closed his eyes. Was he sorry for Aaron? His brother had to be confused as shit. Hurt, too, after being rejected. But God, he fucking deserved it, didn’t he? After all he’d done to Josh, there was a strange sense of justice that he’d had to experience the very thing he’d preached against. Dammit, he’d never said sorry, never asked for forgiveness. He’d never even shown up after Noah had gotten hurt, after Josh had been…

  No, don’t go there. Fuck, the fog is coming. It’s coming. It’s so hard to think. Too much to think about. What the fuck does Aaron want? I’m not helping him. He can go fuck himself.

  My head hurts, it hurts.

  Josh pressed his clenched fists against his head in an attempt to make it stop.

  “Josh, stay with me, baby.”

  Connor’s voice pierced through the fog in his head. He fought back the cloud enveloping him, wanting to stay in the present, stay with Connor.

  Strong arms lifted him, and he was parked squarely on Connor’s lap. “I’m right here, baby. Stay with me.”

  In a reflex, Josh leaned back, felt the safety of the muscular body surrounding him. “That’s it,” Connor said, his mouth close to Josh's ear. “Lean on me. I’m right here with you. I’m gonna kiss you now, okay?”

  The words wouldn’t come yet, and his eyes wouldn’t open, but Josh knew he’d made it through. Connor’s breath danced over his lips, and then his warm, firm mouth settled on his. Hell, yeah. Within seconds, he was back, relaxing into the kiss. Connor was such a terrific kisser. His mouth was like the rest of him, big and firm and hot as hell. And his tongue…the man could work magic with it wherever he put it.

  Connor pulled back his mouth but kept Josh close. “You good?”

  Josh nodded. Swallowed. “Yeah. I’m back. Thank you.”

  As soon as he opened his eyes, Josh had to face Aaron. How embarrassing he’s seen me this weak, this vulnerable. Immediately, Josh pushed back that thought as utter bullshit. Aaron had no right to judge at all. Plus, Josh really didn’t give a shit what his brother thought or felt about him.

  He opened his eyes, ready to combat whatever judgment he’d see in Aaron’s eyes. Instead, he found his brother studying him with worry.

  “Are you okay?” Aaron asked.

 
“I have PTSD. I don’t deal well with shock.”

  Aaron looked uncomfortable. “I’m sorry. I didn’t know.”

  “You would’ve if you’d bothered to come see me after my discharge. How long have you known you were gay?”

  “A couple of years. I knew for sure after you’d enlisted, but I didn’t want to believe it. I didn’t want to accept God would be so cruel as to make us both gay. “

  Josh grimaced. “At least you’ve dropped the whole rhetoric on men choosing to be gay, choosing this lifestyle. That’s what you and Mom and Dad kept telling me, that I chose this for myself.”

  Connor’s arms tightened slightly around him as if to signal he was safe. He leaned back more, let himself be fully supported by Connor.

  “I know that I can never make up for what I did to you. All I can say is I’m so sorry, so very sorry.”

  The sincerity in Aaron’s words was easy to spot, but Josh wasn’t sure if it was enough. Would there ever be a way he could forgive Aaron? Move past this? His life had been hell at home, and his brother had been a part of that.

  “What happened to you to get you looking like this?” Connor asked.

  Aaron shuffled his feet, shifting in his chair. “I got beat up two days ago.”

  “I can see that. Why?” Connor said patiently.

  “I went to a bar. Someone took offense to me being gay.”

  “A bar close by?”

  Aaron sighed. “O’Flannigan. I wanted to relax a little, find the courage to come here. Look, I didn’t know, okay? I met this guy. I thought he was flirting with me, and I flirted back. When I asked him to meet me out back, he showed up with his friend, and they beat the crap out of me.”

  Connor shook his head. “O’Flannigan is about as redneck as you can get it up here. They don’t like gays on principle. We get called in regularly for fights and assaults there. Not that much ever sticks as they all defend each other till kingdom come. Still, you should press charges.”

  “Connor is a cop,” Josh explained when he noticed Aaron’s confused expression.

  “No, thanks. I know a lost cause when I see one. So, no offense, Josh, but what happened to Noah? Did you guys break up?”

  Understandable as the question was—Aaron knew from Josh's teenage years how close he and Noah had been—Josh had no intention of explaining anything. “I get that you’re sorry, Aaron, and I believe you mean it. Doesn’t mean it wipes out everything you did to me. And it certainly doesn’t mean that now you’re gay, too, we’re best buddies. You haven’t earned the right to ask me anything about Noah.”

  Aaron’s shoulders slumped. “I know. It’s… I didn’t know where else to go. I’ve run out of options, and you were my last resort. But I understand you don’t want anything to do with me. I deserve that.”

  Josh studied Aaron to see if he was playing the woe-is-me card, but his words rang true. “I didn’t say that. You can stay here, at least for a day or two till you figure out your next step. Just don’t ask too many questions.”

  “Thank you, Josh. I mean it. I won’t be a bother.”

  Connor was waiting in bed, patiently, till Josh was done taking a shower. His offer to take one together had been kindly rejected as Josh had indicated he needed some time to think. As an introvert, Josh needed alone time to recharge. Connor understood all too well, being introverted himself, but he couldn’t help being slightly disappointed, especially since it had been such a tense day. He would’ve loved to relax together in the shower.

  Josh had made up a fresh bed for Aaron in the guest bedroom and had moved Connor’s stuff into the master bedroom. Connor seemed to be taking Noah’s place in several aspects. He tried to let go of the weird vibe surrounding that. It wasn’t like Josh could do anything about his brother showing up out of the blue.

  Connor had insisted on checking Aaron out physically. He wasn’t a doctor, but he knew enough to spot the signs of possible trouble after a beating like that, like broken ribs or internal bleeding. Luckily, it looked like Aaron had gotten away with mere bruises—though an impressive number of them.

  Aaron had slept part of the day, no doubt exhausted by both his injuries and a lack of sleep in the last few days. He hadn’t said much, but Connor got the impression he’d been living in his car. Certainly, things had to have been fairly desperate for Aaron to throw himself on the mercy of the brother he’d treated so badly.

  It had been scary, watching Josh slip away like that. Connor had remembered what Noah had told him, how your voice could be enough if you caught it early. He’d figured kissing Josh couldn’t hurt either. It had certainly worked for Indy.

  Josh's earlier confession of having slept with Indy made more sense now that Indy turned out to be a guy. But it still left Connor with questions. Why had Indy slept with him when he clearly was in love with Noah? Josh and Noah, Connor could understand. He didn’t like it—and that was an understatement—but he understood why they’d needed each other. But Indy and Josh? Why would Indy do that?

  Unless Indy had a reason to choose Josh over Noah. Josh was softer, easier. A bottom.

  Connor remembered what had happened to Indy, or Stephan as he’d been back then. The story of how Duncan had set him up with their vile serpent of a cousin Eric and how Stephan had taken the guy out—it had broken Connor’s heart and filled him with a deep respect at the same time. He was nothing if not a survivor. But there was no doubt an experience like that had resulted in sexual trauma. And who better to help him overcome that than another survivor? Josh must’ve offered to let Indy fuck him, to show him how different it could be. Connor sighed with relief as the puzzle bits fell into place.

  It was a little disconcerting at times, this complete focus of his mind and body on Josh. Connor had never felt anything like this, not even close. He’d been attracted to men before, but he’d never, ever felt this deep need like he did with Josh. What had started out as simple attraction in that Stewart’s store, had morphed into something much more complicated and intense. A constant desire to be with Josh, to be near him. A powerful need to take care of him and protect him. A pressing want that burned through his veins and made him almost crazy at times.

  Love. This had to be what love felt like.

  Josh stepped into the room timidly, a towel casually wrapped around his waist. “Sorry, it took me a while to relax.”

  Connor smiled. “It’s okay, baby. What’s not okay is that towel. Why are you depriving me of the most fantastic view ever?”

  A shy smile spread across Josh's lips. “You’re saying my body is better than, say, the skyline of Boston? Or some breathtaking mountain lake view?”

  Connor chuckled. “Baby, your ass tops anything I’ve ever seen. Hands down. Now ditch the towel.”

  His two favorite words echoed through the room as Josh unhooked the towel and let it slide to the floor. “Yes, Connor.”

  “Much better,” Connor let out, his voice hoarse. “Turn around.”

  Josh obediently turned around, flashed Connor a full view of those gorgeous long legs and that amazing tight butt. Connor hadn’t been joking: Josh's ass was a sight to behold. Those two curves were so perfectly tight and soft at the same time.

  “How’s your hole?” he enquired. Josh hesitated, and Connor’s eyes narrowed. “Do not lie to me, Joshua.”

  He watched a powerful shiver tear through his lover’s body. “It’s still tender. But I want you, Connor. It’s okay, baby, I can take it.”

  Damn, Josh all but pouted, and it made Connor’s insides go liquid. “No,” he said firmly. “I’m not taking you when you’re still sore.”

  Josh pushed his bottom lip out into a full pout. “Before Indy came, Noah would fuck me every day. I don’t need to wait.”

  “Really? You thought that a comparison to Noah would make me give in? Dumb strategy, Joshua. Last time I checked, Noah’s dick wasn’t on equal terms with the Beast.”

  Shit, had he referred to his own cock with that term? Josh would never let it go now
.

  A slow, seductive smile played around Josh's lips. “True. The Beast has no equal. Nothing feels as good as your cock inside me, baby.”

  Oh, fuck. If Josh kept that strategy up, Connor was toast. He had to do something, because he was serious about not fucking Josh until he was completely recovered. He wasn’t taking any chances.

  “I’ll tell you what, baby, how about we do a little wager? I haven’t come all day, and to be honest, I’m pretty horny. If you manage to make me come five times tonight, I’ll prepare a session for you later this week that will make yesterday pale in comparison.”

  Josh's eyes grew big, and a delicious blush crept over his cheeks. “And if I lose? Which I won’t by the way, but out of curiosity.”

  Connor put on his stern face. “If you lose, I won’t fuck you for another week. Fair’s fair, right?”

  “And I can do whatever I want to make you come, correct?”

  Connor had to swallow. What was Josh planning? The gleam in his eyes promised little good. It didn’t matter. Even he with his stamina couldn’t come five times in a row. “Anything, except making me fuck you.”

  “Oh, you’re so on. Trust me, you’ll see actual fucking stars by the time I’m done with you. Now, lay back on the bed and enjoy the ride.”

  It took little over a minute for Connor to blow his first load. Josh licked his lips as he sucked the last bit of cum off the Beast. Making Connor come with a blow job was almost too easy as the guy still wasn’t used to the sensation of his cock in Josh's mouth. Josh had no doubt the second and third orgasm would be doable as well, knowing Connor’s insatiable stamina. The fourth and fifth, however, now that would be a challenge. He’d have to come up with something special…and he knew just the thing.

  He jacked Connor off for a second load, which took slightly longer, then went to town on another blow job for the third one. It took considerably more effort, but seeing Connor’s deep satisfaction when he finally came had been in itself worth it. It was time to take it to the next level.

  He brought a warm washcloth from the bathroom, cleaned Connor up thoroughly. If the man had any inkling what was coming, he never said a word.