by Ali Parker
"This is what it's all about, isn't it?" Caleb said. "The music, us. It was never about any of that other shit."
Truth be told, I'd known for a long time Caleb wasn't comfortable with the level of fame we'd reached and that he longed for these days we were reliving right here. He felt we'd let everything get away from us and that the only outcome of the uncontrolled boom he saw in Destitute was the inevitable crash-landing we would have to endure sooner or later.
We'd argued over it so many times, with me telling him to just relax and have fun with it. Ironic how I was now the one who felt we'd let the lifestyle get the best of us and had pulled so far back on the throttle in my attempts to overcorrect that Destitute was now dead in the water.
Only, it was my hand on the throttle. If I wanted, all I had to do was push it forward just a little, and we'd be back in business. We didn't have to push it all the way back down to full speed.
We could take it slower. Not an option I'd considered before because I couldn't be sure how long it would last, but I knew it now. I understood now that they would stand by us, by Caleb, and that they'd be willing to tone it down if need be.
I knew it because of all the things they could have done to get me back in the band, of all the things they'd said, of all the stages they could have tricked me onto, of all the fans they could have had singing my songs back at me, this was the one thing that really caught my attention. Alicia's idea, yes, and I would be sure to get to her later. But the guys had gone along with it. It was them playing beside me and them choosing the songs, so what else could I say?
"If you guys are game, do you think we could get back into our recording studio tomorrow?"
Silence followed my question. My heart stammered. Was it possible I'd misinterpreted what they were trying to do here?
The guys exchanged a glance and then broke out in a chorus of "hell, yeah's!" They slapped each other's palms, smiling so damn widely, you'd have sworn they'd won the lottery.
Dom came over to me, lifting one hand to grip my shoulder. "I knew you'd come around. Welcome back, brother."
Matt was next, smirking as he punched my arm. "Don't do that to us again, man. You really scared me. And don't worry, you're not the only one who's learned your lesson."
He didn't have to say what lesson he was referring to. We'd known each other for long enough, I knew it was his way of saying they were on board with doing things my way, keeping an eye on each other to make sure no one fucked up again.
"Thanks," I told him. It went without saying, but I needed him to know how much that meant to me.
He nodded once and went to join Dom, who jabbed at the button to open the garage door and sauntered out. Caleb was speaking in low tones to Alicia, still watching everything unfold from the sidelines.
That left me and Nick.
I walked up to him, finding an apologetic smile that would have to do the trick because I wasn't saying sorry. Did I regret hitting him that morning in New York after he’d told me the news? Sometimes. But I'd been pissed, and apologizing about it now wouldn't change the fact that it happened. We would either put it behind us or we wouldn't, but there was no taking it back.
He gently set his guitar in its stand and rubbed his jaw where I'd hit him, watching my approach with cautious eyes. "Round two?"
I chuckled, shaking my head. "Not unless you've done something I should know about."
"Nothing but conspire behind your back to get the band back together." He arched an eyebrow, the corners of his eyes crinkling as he tried to hold back a grin.
"This time, I'll let it go. Consider yourself forgiven." I joked, but the words were laden with meaning.
Nick nodded, gave me a quick pat on the back and walked off to Dom and Matt. Caleb and Alicia, having finished their whispered conversation, broke apart. He smiled at me, saluted and called out, "Give me a shout later."
"Will do," I called after his retreating back, my attention already shifted to Alicia.
Her eyes were wide as she watched me, apprehension in everything from the way she was looking at me to her rigid posture. "You okay?"
"Thanks to you," I answered honestly. Closing the distance between us, I cupped her face gently in my hand. "I mean it. You gave me back the one thing that has always made sense in my life."
She smiled softly and lifted her arms to wind them around my neck. "I couldn't give it back to you, because you never lost it. I only made you see it was still there."
"Agree to disagree?" There were no words to express how much what she'd done meant to me. I might never have lost the band or the music, but I'd been willing and in the process of throwing it away with both hands.
If it hadn't been for what she'd done, I might never have realized it. At least not in time to salvage the situation.
"Okay." She half turned her head toward the guys, still standing in a loose circle outside the garage doors talking. "I should get going too. I'll let you get back to whatever it was you were going to do today and see you tomorrow?"
"You got anything urgent to get done?"
She shrugged, her mouth lifting into a teasing smile. "Nah. The band I work for has been taking something of a hiatus. We're jumping back in tomorrow apparently."
"In that case, it seems we've both got the rest of the day free. Wanna spend it together?"
She gazed up into my eyes and sighed before nodding. "Depends. What did you have in mind? It's going to have to top movies and ice cream if you have a chance at beating what I already had planned."
Lowering my lips down to hers, I brushed a tender kiss onto them and whispered in her ear. "I'm sure I can do better than that."
6
Alicia
My breath caught in my lungs as Jared brought his strong fingers to my chin and tilted it up so I would meet his eyes. They were dark with lust, the sides of his mouth pulled up in a small smirk.
“The others,” I mumbled, only vaguely registering the rest of the band was still here. At best, they were thirty feet away from us. Strangely, I didn’t really care. Being this close to Jared again was intoxicating. Feeling his lips on mine and his body against mine was magic. Like taking a hit of the best drug ever.
“Forget about them,” he growled as he dropped his hands to grip my hips and licked the shell of my ear. “They’ll leave soon.”
He walked us backward until I could feel the hard, cold wall pressed up against my back. One of his hands shot out, and I heard the whir of the motor of the garage door as it started closing. Then his mouth crashed down onto mine in a kiss that made my toes curl and my blood catch fire.
God, how I missed him.
His hands skimmed from my hips to my shoulders, sliding over the straps of my dress and toying with my neckline.
Jared’s touch did things to me nothing else could. From the way he was reacting to our fervent kisses, I would be willing to bet he was as ready to go as I was. He broke the kiss, heat and lust and want blazing in his eyes. His voice was deep and commanding as he ordered me to turn around. And so I did.
I wanted to do whatever he wanted from me, as long as he didn’t want me to stop being here with him, doing exactly what we were doing.
I couldn’t deny Jared and I had a lot of things to work out. The mountains of things we had to talk about were so high, I got dizzy just thinking about how painful it was going to be trying to get through it.
But I didn’t want to think about that right now. I didn’t want to have to plan or wonder about the future. I just wanted to feel and lose myself in the pleasure of being with him. All the talking could wait, so could the second-guessing and cussing myself out for going there with him again.
But god, these last weeks had been so long, so lonely and depressing. I just wanted to bask in how he was making me feel right now.
And so that was what I was going to do. Stuffing all my thoughts about work and how the band was back together and wondering what, if anything, that meant for me and Jared tightly into a lockbox in my hea
d, I turned to face the wall as he undid my zipper.
My pussy clenched, and my back arched.
I wanted him that badly. I was aching for him. The feel of his body, the smell of his masculine scent and knowing he wanted me and had missed me as much as I did him was enough to make me feel like I was about to melt into a puddle of desire.
His hands caressed my shoulders as he slid first the right and then the left strap of my dress off, causing the fabric to slide down and pool at my waist. Fingers dropping and trailing lower until they skimmed my hips under the dress, until they were on my butt, he hooked them into the elastic of my panties and pulled them down.
My thong fell to my feet, and I kicked it away, sending my heels after it. His fingers dug into my flesh and explored every bare inch of my skin. My hipbones, my ass, my thighs. He was driving me crazy.
Needing him to touch me, I arched my back again so my ass pushed into his crotch. Turning me around so we were facing each other, his expression was intense with lust. My knees threatened to buckle under the weight of it.
He moved to pin me against the wall with his body as if he could tell I was having trouble holding myself up. The warmth and weight of his body holding me against the wall felt so good, my eyelids fluttered closed.
His fingertips grazed my skin again, and I shuddered, and then his hot mouth was on my neck and kissed his way to my ear, sucking at a sensitive spot behind it. He didn’t stop there, kissing a path past my jawline and up my lips.
Leaning into him, I pressed my body closer to his.
He was so fucking hard that I moaned out loud when our bodies connected. I rolled my hips, rubbing my aching core against him, but it wasn’t enough. Jared was taking this slowly, though, as if he was savoring it.
Sliding a hand up my thigh, he groaned and caught my lower lip with the thumb of his other hand. I stared at him as he dragged his thumb over my lip, not wanting to break his intense gaze.
He pushed his thumb clear into my mouth, and I closed it around him, pressing my tongue to his pad, moving it around his finger as if it was his cock. A low, throaty groan fell from his lips.
Giving Jared head was possibly one of my favorite things to do. It sounded crazy, even in my head, but the man was so responsive, I just couldn’t help it. I loved the way it made me feel.
While I was considering dropping to my knees and replacing his thumb with his cock for real, he withdrew his finger from my mouth and lowered his head to kiss my neck. He unhooked my bra and his fingertips caressed my skin.
The ache building between my legs was becoming painful. I squeezed my thighs together for some relief and abandoned my plan to go down on him. I needed him too much, too soon.
Kissing a line down my neck, over my shoulders, he shifted lower to plant a kiss on my chest. My fingers flew to his soft hair as he sucked a nipple into his hot, wet mouth. He flicked it with his tongue before releasing it with a soft pop and doing the same with the other nipple.
My breathing was heavy. Ragged. But so was his. I didn’t want to rush him, but I was going to explode if he didn’t speed up. It’d been too long, and my vibrator couldn’t make me feel half the things he could.
“Jared. Please.”
His palm cupped my sex, and his voice was breathy, his breathing hard in my ear. “You’re so wet. Do you want my fingers inside you?”
“Yes,” I breathed. “Please.”
His lips sank to mine as my hands danced over his taut stomach.
Jared had come downstairs before their impromptu band practice wearing only pajama pants, a fact I was now thankful for. His skin was warm under my palms, his toned muscles jumping under my touch.
My legs started shaking as his hands skimmed up my thighs again. “I’ll kick you if you stop.”
Lips quirking into a smirk, his fingers skimmed my sex.
“Like that?” His hand was steady as he stroked my clit. I dug my fingers into the hard lines of his stomach as his fingers slid down my slit.
I spread my legs to give him better access and nearly collapsed when he dipped a finger inside me. “Yes!”
Only the weight of his body pressing me against the wall was keeping me from falling down. His fingers moved faster, deeper. His kiss became harder, more aggressive. Tension pulsed between my legs. I was so close. As always, Jared gave me exactly what I needed when I needed it.
“Come for me, Alicia.”
With his next stroke, I did. Pleasure thundered through me as the knot of tension released, and I gasped. “Jared!”
He kept me pressed against the wall with his hips and he stroked me through it, his voice a breathy groan against my neck. “I’ve missed seeing that.”
“I’ve missed feeling it,” I whispered back once I rediscovered the ability to speak. “But now I want to feel it the other way.”
“Give me a sec?” He steadied me on my feet, waited until he was sure I wasn’t about to fall over and then rushed over to the shelf in the garage.
I knew by now that Jared was always prepared, so I wasn’t surprised when he came away with a foil packet. He walked back over to me, stuck the packet between his teeth and shoved his drawstring pants over his ass just far enough to expose his fully engorged cock.
I sucked in a breath as he sheathed himself and moved his hands to my ass. He held me against the wall but paused. “You sure about this?”
“Don’t you dare stop.” He nipped at my lower lip at my cheeky response.
“Yes, ma’am.” He mock saluted me quickly and then got down to business. “Wrap your legs around me.”
Bringing his hands to my thighs to help me, he lifted me against him. I hooked my ankles around his waist as he positioned our bodies, keeping his eyes on mine.
There. His cock nudged my sex and then slid in. We both breathed out in relief as he slid deeper, so deep that it was suddenly difficult to breathe. He slowed as he slid home, watching me intently.
His breathing was coming in gasps, and my hands went to the back of his neck as I drew him closer and started kissing him.
Slowly, he started to move. Fuck, he felt good.
He groaned as he continued his steady motions. “You feel so fucking good.”
“My thoughts exactly,” I moaned. “About you, not me.”
My thighs squeezed his hips. He needed to know how good he was making me feel as he moved inside me. Again and again.
Kissing me hungrily, almost frantically, he drove into me. Harder. Faster. Until everything he was doing was perfect.
I lifted my hips to press my clit against his pubic bone, losing myself in the pleasure that was building inside me. My fingers dug into his skin. His hands stayed under my ass, pinning me in place as he matched his movements to my moans.
Jared groaned low and deep, getting close. “Fuck, Alicia.”
His groans sent shockwaves of pleasure cascading through my body. The sounds of his obvious pleasure pushed me right to the edge, and with his next stroke, I went flying over and I came again.
One of his hands knotted in the hair at the nape of my neck as he followed me over.
“Alicia.” He let out a loud moan. And then there it was. I could feel his cock twitch deep inside me as he emptied himself, his head buried in the crook of my neck as his hips bucked and his muscles quivered.
He held me steady against the wall and pressed his lips to my shoulder as our breathing returned to normal.
“Thank you," Jared whispered when we finally stilled. "For what you did."
"To be fair, you did most of the work," I teased, trying to catch my breath. I was still shaky, but I wiggled against him so he’d put me down.
He smirked, letting me down to the floor. "Oh, I know. That's why I wasn't thanking you for the orgasm."
"You've already thanked me for the other thing." What I'd seen this morning was honestly the realest, rawest thing I'd ever had the pleasure of witnessing.
I loved music, had a nearly unbridled passion for my job, and had a great d
eal of respect for those who made the music I loved so much. But when you dealt with bands at the level I did, it was sometimes easy to forget where it all came from.
I would owe Kelly forever for giving me the idea that would spark the reunion I felt kind of privileged to have been a witness to.
Destitute stripped down to nothing but their music and who they really were was something to behold. I'd seen them all up on stage, I'd seen them woo thousands upon thousands of fans at once, and I'd seen them work crowds into a frenzy, but I'd never seen them that magnetic.
Jared on stage oozing his natural charisma was a force of nature, but this morning, he managed to be even more than that. I didn't quite know how to explain it, but I knew I'd done the right thing by getting Gerry to give me some more time to figure it out. And basically breaking into Jared’s house to make it happen.
He planted a soft kiss on my forehead and swept a bit of hair that'd fallen out of my ponytail during our lovemaking, if you could call it that, from my neck. "I know I've already thanked you for that, but I don't really feel like that was enough. I don't really know what to say to someone who cares enough about me and my band to keep fighting for us, even after I stopped."
"You don't have to say anything." I pressed a kiss to his lips. Jared vulnerable and open like he was now was a rarity, but the last thing I wanted was for him to feel like he owed me something. In an attempt to lighten the mood, I winked at him and said jokingly. "I did it for the pay, not for you."
Some humor returned to Jared's eyes as he teased me back. "We don't pay you that well."
"True but looking for another gig in this economy would've sucked." I laughed, sliding my arms through the sleeves on my dress and stepping back into the heels I'd kicked off. "I'll see you tomorrow at the studio, okay?"
"Okay." He agreed, looking like he wanted to say something else but didn't. Hitting the button for the garage door, he gave me a strange smile. "See you tomorrow, Alicia."
7
Jared
