Fairly Human

by Holly Fuhrmann

Since she'd gotten pregnant she couldn't seem to get enough of it.

  Chapter Nineteen

  Fern

  "I have great news,” Bernie said with a huge smile on his face.

  Great news for Bernie wasn't always great news for them, Fern thought, remembering that the last time he'd had great news, he'd turned them into humans for six months.

  Actually, to the best of her knowledge, great news for Bernie was never even okay news for them.

  "Don't just sit there gloating, Bernie. Out with it,” Myrtle commanded.

  She was back to her old self, Fern noted.

  Myrtle's date had perked her right back up. More than perked her up. She was a sighing, giggling fool.

  It looked good on her, Fern reflected.

  "Yeah, Bernie, what did you do this time?” Blossom said, with a huge, put-upon sigh.

  Blossom, on the other hand, seemed withdrawn and sad since her date.

  Fern wasn't sure just what had happened between her sister and her mystery man, but it wasn't good.

  Not good at all.

  "Now, that's a fine how'd'you'do,” Bernie groused. “After all the work I went to in order to—"

  Fiona popped into the room.

  Not the happy, smiling Fiona that they'd all grown to know and love, but the Fiona they'd first met, the Fiona who had sued them. This Fiona was filled with righteous indignation and downright anger.

  "I can't believe you did it, you louse,” she said to Bernie.

  "Fiona, it's for the best,” he told her, his voice soothing and more than a bit condescending. “If you had a bit more fairy experience, you'd see that."

  "The best, you rat?” she huffed. “I'll tell you what was the best. My work. You don't know how hard it was to set everything up. How I planned and plotted. And everything was going like clockwork until you stuck your big nose—"

  "Hey, I have a perfectly sized nose for my face,” Bernie protested.

  "Your big, vain nose into my business. I'm their fairy godmother—"

  "That's enough,” Myrtle bellowed. “Now, why don't the two of you tell us just what's going on?"

  "He—” Fiona started, sputtering a line of he-he-he's.

  Bernie smiled a sort of oily smile at the three of them, and Fern felt a wave of trepidation.

  "What?” she asked.

  "I went to the Council and assured them that I thought you'd learned your lessons. We all agreed, enough is enough. And they decided that you would be restored to your fairyness as of right...” He waved a symbol in the air. “Now."

  Fern looked down and saw that she was once again wearing her old-lady persona. She looked at her sisters.

  "We're fairies again,” she whispered.

  Rather than feeling elated, she felt horrible.

  Her first thought was of Nico. It was followed by thoughts of Les Magik and Puffy and ... kisses.

  "Bernie, but we haven't,” she said.

  "Haven't what?” he asked.

  "Learned our lesson,” Fern clarified. “Why, I'm sure that on our very first assignment, we'll muck up."

  "Yes,” Myrtle agreed. “I'm sure we will."

  "Well, I for one,” Blossom said, “am ready to be a fairy again, I've had enough of mortals, especially mortal men. I find them so confusing. All this talk about trust. It's not as if he's been exactly open and honest with me. He's hiding something, I know it. Yes, I'm ready to go back, but unfortunately, I have a commitment and can't come back to work right now."

  "What commitment,” Fern asked at the same time Myrtle did.

  She was dying to know what her sister had been up to.

  "I can't say,” Blossom said. “And I can't go back. At least not yet."

  She waved the wand that appeared in her hand, and suddenly she was young and beautiful again.

  "And boobless,” she said with a heavy sigh as she looked down at her feet.

  "What are you saying?” Bernie bellowed.

  "I'm saying that obviously Fern and Myrtle were right. I never did have breasts."

  "Not about breasts,” he said.

  He was turning decidedly red in the face, Fern noted. “Bernie, calm down, or you're going to hurt yourself,” she warned.

  "What are you saying about going back?” he asked, slowly and concisely.

  "We're saying that you sent us here for six months, and we're not ready to go back after just a handful of weeks,” Blossom assured him.

  Fern just looked at her sister, standing up to Bernie like that. Whatever she was up to, it was good for her.

  "But—” Bernie said.

  "But nothing,” Fiona said with a grin. “That's my girls. And Bernie, now that you've given them back their powers, you can't take them back again."

  "I'll just go back to the Council...” he said, his voice trailing off, as if even he realized it wasn't going to work.

  "You've already convinced them the girls had learned their lessons,” Fiona said with a huge smile. “Sorry. You can't have it both ways."

  "But—But—"

  "Good-bye, Bernie. I'll see you when I get home."

  "Are you coming home?” he asked, and for the first time Fern heard the vulnerability in his voice.

  Fiona must have as well, because she laid a hand softly on his cheek and said, “You may annoy me, but there's nothing you can ever do that would make me not come home."

  "You slept here one night.” he pointed out.

  "But I came home afterward,” she pointed out.

  "I—"

  "Good-bye, Bernie. You've done your part, now go.” She waved her hand in the air, and he started to fade.

  "My part?” he asked even as he disappeared.

  "So,” she said, smiling at all of them.

  There was something in Fiona's smile that told Fern that this new development might not have annoyed Fiona as much as she had led Bernie to believe it did.

  "Now you all have your fairy powers back,” she continued, “what are you going to do?"

  "I can't go back, at least not yet,” Blossom said. “Like I said, I have an obligation I have to honor first."

  Fiona looked at Myrtle. “And you?"

  "I—I just can't leave without explaining things to Zak. After his mother left, he won't handle another loss well.” She waved her wand and resumed her younger look.

  Fiona turned to Fern.

  Part of Fern wanted to go back to when she and her sisters worried about their next godchild's love life, and not their own. But she thought of Nico and found herself saying, “I'm staying as well. For now."

  "Fine.” Fiona paused a moment and added, “But now that you have your powers back, be careful. You know sometimes your magic sort of ... Well, does its own thing."

  "Now, Fiona,” Blossom started just as Fiona patted her stomach. “Oh, I do see what you mean. I'll be careful."

  "Yes,” Myrtle and Fern agreed at the same time.

  Yes, Fern had to be careful as well, because if she wasn't, she was going to fall in love with Nico, and then where would that leave her when her sisters were ready to go home?

  * * * *

  "So, what are you doing tomorrow?” Nico asked the next day.

  Fern punched the dough and folded it over with a lot more force than was required.

  She'd hardly slept last night. She had her powers back, and she was still working at Les Magik. Myrtle was even out of her funk.

  She should be happy.

  She should have slept like a baby.

  Instead she was tired and out of sorts.

  "Fern?” Nico said again.

  She realized the bread dough was more than well-kneaded, and her boss was more than slightly miffed at her lack of attention. She put the dough in a greased bowl and said, “Pardon?"

  "Tomorrow. Do you have plans?” He shot her a killer smile. The kind of smile that he'd probably used on any number of women. Human women. Thanks to Bernie, the rat, Fern no longer could be ranked with the rest of the human women.

 
If she was honest, she never had.

  She was just there on a temporary status only.

  Nico was still talking. “I'm giving us both a day off and..."

  He'd paused, obviously waiting for some response from her.

  He'd hired two new part-time cooks for Sundays, but this was the first time he'd suggested taking a weekday off.

  A day off he thought he'd be spending with a human woman, not a fairy.

  "The day off?” she simply echoed, not knowing what to say. She could try, Nico, remember when you said you thought I was hiding something from you? I was. I'm not human. I'm a fairy.

  Oh, yeah, that would go over good.

  "Fern, did you ever notice that when you're nervous you repeat things?” he asked, stepping closer.

  She wiped her hands on the towel, but the bread dough was tough to remove.

  Remembering she once again had powers, she zapped the dried on dough off her hands.

  Nico gave a small jump, as if he'd seen it, but he couldn't have seen the dough disappear. Her hands were covered by the towel.

  "Nervous?” she said, even as she realized she'd done just as he'd accused and echoed his words right back at him again.

  "And the question I have to ask,” he said, taking another step closer, “is why are you nervous?"

  "Um, I'm nervous because ... because...” She tried to think of an excuse—any excuse—other than the fact she was nervous because she was a fairy, a fairy with feelings for a testy mortal. “Because I've been worried about Puffy."

  He stopped advancing and frowned. “Why are you worried about Puffy?"

  "Ever since you said he was visiting with his mother, he's been acting strange."

  And strange for Puffy was ... Well, very strange.

  Fern realized that while saying she was worried about Puffy was the truth, it wasn't the whole truth. She was nervous about Nico—about how close he was standing, about how much she wanted to kiss him, and about the fact she was a fairy and he wasn't.

  The last part, the she-was-a-fairy-and-he-wasn't was the part that made her the most nervous. Mixed relationships rarely worked out well.

  "How do you mean?"

  She started to answer about mixed relationships, “Well, when two people—"

  They weren't talking about mixed relationships, though, so she hastily switched gears. “When two people work as closely as Puffy and I do, you notice things. He's quiet and ... well, just unPuffylike."

  "So, that's why you're nervous?” He took another step.

  "Yes."

  Fern knew she should step away, knew that kissing a mortal when she was a fairy was dangerous, but she held her ground.

  "It doesn't have anything to do with the fact that I'm standing just inches away from you?” he asked.

  "Of course not. You don't intimidate me."

  "I know. That first time you threw me out of the kitchen, I realized it.” He paused and added, “And I liked it."

  "You did?” Now that was a surprise. She hadn't thought Nico liked anything about her that first day.

  "Sure. No man wants the woman he's interested in to be afraid of him."

  "What do you mean interested in?"

  He'd kissed her, but you didn't need to be a fairy godmother to know that men—fairy or mortal—didn't have to be interested in a woman to kiss them.

  Actually, the fact that a woman was breathing was generally all the prompting a man needed.

  "I'm standing just inches away from you, and you can't tell what I mean?” He tsked. “Well, let me give you a hint."

  He leaned down and kissed her. Not a slow introduction, but a hot, wild fusion of two people into one. She couldn't get close enough ... couldn't ... couldn't...

  "Oh, oh, oh, I, I, I'll just go back—"

  Puffy's stuttering voice brought Fern back to Earth with a sharper thud than the door that slammed when Puffy fled.

  What was she doing? This could never work out. She was, after all, a fairy again. And Nico was quite human.

  Suddenly she realized that there was something wrong with that statement.

  He was human, but wasn't there was something else there?

  Now that she was a fairy, she could sense things she hadn't been able to tell before. Things she hadn't been looking for, so hadn't noticed until he touched her.

  She stepped back, suddenly furious. “You're not what you seem."

  Nico stepped back and studied her with an equal intensity. “Neither are you. How could I not have noticed before? I mean, I would have bet that you were human, but you're not."

  "Neither are you, at least not completely. Knowing that you're magical, you'd toy with a human's affections? You know how it is when humans and magical beings mix. And if you don't, I do. A lot of pain. Why just look at Fiona. She was miserable, trying to fit where she'd never fit. And Bernie? Why he has a chip on his half-human shoulder the size of a boulder. No, it never ends happily-ever-after when a human and a magical being get involved, and yet, you were willing to seduce a poor human woman."

  "You're the woman I was trying to seduce, and there's nothing poor about you. Even when I thought you were human. You're argumentative and don't take my bull. I'd like that in any lady, fairy or not."

  "Well, well...” her anger fizzled. “I don't understand who you are and why you're here."

  "I could say the same,” he countered. “You weren't a fairy the last time I kissed you."

  Nico wasn't human, at least not fully.

  The idea was going to take some getting used to.

  "I want some explanations,” he said.

  "So do I. You said you knew I was hiding something, but what you didn't say is that you were, too."

  Puffy burst into the room and cried, “Nico, help!” and ran back out again.

  "I guess this isn't the time,” Nico said, still studying her.

  She wasn't sure just what he was looking for, but she studied him as well. Even without her powers, she couldn't believe she'd missed the fact he was part fairy.

  "You're right, we do. But not tonight. I have to talk to my sisters tonight.” They'd all agreed not to return to Fairyland for a while yet, but Fern was pretty sure that she couldn't go back. No matter what happened between her and Nico, she didn't think going back was an option.

  She had to talk to her sisters, then she had to talk to Nico. “What about that dinner tomorrow, and we can sort this out?"

  "And then?” he asked.

  "Then, after we talk, and both explain, we'll just have to see."

  Yes, she'd see what was going to happen with Nico, but first she had to talk to her sisters.

  Chapter Twenty

  Myrtle

  Myrtle stood on the front steps staring at the door for the longest time. She wanted to go in and see Gordon ... and conversely, she dreaded it.

  She was a fairy again.

  The fact was right there, weighing her down. She'd finally felt as if she'd found something ... someone. That maybe she could fit into a human life. And now?

  Now, she was back to being a fairy again.

  The door flew open before she had a chance to knock.

  "Myrtle, how come you're standing on the porch?” Zak asked.

  "Well, it beats standing on the roof,” she said.

  Ugh. How lame. But Zak didn't seem to mind.

  He laughed and said, “Dad says we're going to the beach. It's still too cold to swim, but I'm going to build the biggest sand castle ever, and Dad's taking hot dogs, and we're going to grill them, and marshmallows. He almost forgot the marshmallows, but I reminded him, and—"

  Gordon came up behind Zak and placed a hand on his shoulder. “Slow, down, buddy, or your going to scare Myrtle away."

  "Nah. I couldn't scare her away. She's brave, right Myrtle?"

  "Yeah. I'm big and brave,” she said with absolutely no conviction.

  She looked at the boy's excited face, then at his father's and knew she was a liar. Not only was she not particularly b
rave, she was an out and out fool. She was here, ready to spend a day with the two of them, and pretend it was a normal, human date. A single father going out with an available woman.

  But she wasn't a woman.

  She was a fairy.

  A fairy godmother.

  Gordon grinned, “We'll be ready in a sec. Make yourself at home.” To Zak he said, “Come give me a hand."

  Zak followed his father toward the kitchen.

  Myrtle was ready to sit down, when she noticed a pair of muddy little boy sneakers on the floor. Without thinking she zapped them into the foyer. Then, she noticed a T-shirt, and before she knew what was happening, she'd magicked the whole room clean.

  She took a seat on the couch, looked at the clean room and knew that this could never work.

  She was attracted to Gordon Martinelli.

  Very attracted.

  But they were two different species.

  She was a fairy.

  He was human.

  She'd have to tell him she couldn't see him again, and then carefully explain to Zak that even though she wouldn't be seeing him, she still cared.

  Maybe when she and her sisters got back to work she'd find a nice woman for Gordon, someone who would not only love him, but love his son.

  Rather than give her that warm glow she generally got when she thought about matchmaking, she felt a small burning ember in the pit of her stomach.

  She didn't want to set Gordon up with anyone else. She wanted him for herself.

  She wanted him fiercely.

  Wildly.

  She'd had godchildren who met their soul mate and experienced what was known as love-at-first sight. It wasn't just love, it was destiny.

  But that couldn't be what was happening between her and Gordon.

  So she wasn't sure what it was, but whatever it was, she was breaking it off tonight, after the beach.

  It would be easier to nip it now, when it was still new and unexplored, than to wait until whatever their connection was grew.

  She'd known him such a short time that all she had to do was break things off and she'd be halfway to being over him

  "Hey, Dad, look, Myrtle cleaned the room."

  Gordon came in and looked around. “Myrtle, you didn't have to."

  Oh, no, what had she done. The room was spotless. She'd magicked it without even thinking.