Bad Romeo Christmas: A Starcrossed Anthology

by Leisa Rayven

  "Then you missed their hot and heavy liplock earlier. And from what I overheard, they've been hooking up on the regular."

  "Really?" She looks impressed I can contribute some juicy info for once. "Well, that's interesting. Zoe usually only dates guys who are rich or semi-famous. Even though Jack's doing well on the stand-up comedy circuit, he hardly gives her bragging rights."

  She continues to talk, but I'm distracted by a flash of red on the other side of the room. When I turn to see what it is, I smile. There's a dark-headed girl talking with Marco, and she's wearing a replica of Lieutenant Uhura's costume from the original Star Trek series. A woman with excellent taste. She has her back to me, so I can't see her face, but she's flashing plenty of thigh. Dang, I'd almost forgotten how short that dress was. It barely covers her ass cheeks. Not that I'm complaining. She has incredible legs.

  As I stare at her, I'm mildly horrified she's turning me on. This isn't supposed to happen now that I have Angel. Other women aren't allowed to have power over Magic Mike.

  I avert my gaze and tell my dick to stand down. Well behaved penis that he is, he complies.

  Maybe it wasn't the girl at all. Perhaps it was just the costume. Uhura was my first serious crush, and seeing her in those short skirts and long boots did new and unusual things to my twelve-year-old body. Coincidentally, that was when I discovered the wonders of masturbation. Ahhh, good times.

  "Josh!" I'm brought back to earth when Elissa slaps me on the shoulder.

  "Ow! What?"

  "Stop staring off into space." Mentally, I whisper, The final frontier. "Angel's on the phone. Said you weren't answering yours."

  I'm careful not to look in the direction of Sexy Uhura as I lean forward and take the phone. I don't think Angel would be impressed with me checking out another girl's legs. "Hey, sorry about not answering. I left my phone in my coat."

  "It's fine. That's what I figured when I couldn't get you."

  The music and crowd noise makes it hard to hear, so I block my other ear with my hand. "So what's up. Are you okay?"

  "Yeah. Just wanted to hear your voice."

  "Aw. I'm not sure how much you can hear, but it's the thought that counts. Are you on your yacht adventure yet?"

  She laughs. "Yes, and it's amazing. We've cruised past the Opera House and the Harbor Bridge, and now they've laid out a full seafood and champagne spread. I could get used to this.

  "Take photos. I want to see everything."

  "I will. I'll text them to Elissa soon. It a beautiful day here."

  I look out the giant picture windows next to us. "Yeah, well, it's snowing here. Not much, but all the people in Times Square will be freezing their balls off."

  "Or boobs, as the case may be."

  "Exactly." The music seems to be getting louder, and I have to raise my voice. "Sorry about the noise. I'll call you back when I get somewhere quieter."

  "Okay, babe. I love you."

  "I love you, too, beautiful." Elissa makes ridiculous kissing sounds, so I shove her off the couch. She lands on the floor with a tight squeal. "I'll talk to you soon."

  As soon as I hang up, I want to call her back. Why is that everything's better when I'm with her, even if only by phone?

  I'm still contemplating that when Elissa tackles me and throws me onto the floor.

  ···

  For a small woman, Elissa is as strong as an ox, and she keeps a firm grip on my hand as she leads me through the crowd.

  "Where are we going?"

  "Over to the bar."

  "I was going to head outside so I could call Angel back."

  "You can in a minute. There's someone I want you to meet first. You're going to love her."

  She leads me over to where Ethan and Cassie are talking to an attractive woman dressed like a flapper. She's older than we are, but she's wearing the hell out of a short slip dress made of fringe. Her slick black bob is topped with a headband and a feather. As we stop beside her, Zoe, Jack, and Connor join us.

  "Erika!" Elissa hugs the woman, and the others follow. It seems I've stumbled into a mutual love fest. Of course, I've heard about Erika. Even though Elissa didn't have a lot to do with her at The Grove, she was Cassie and Ethan's mentor, and from what I understand she had a hand in getting them together. Seems like a pretty cool lady all around.

  When everyone has finished fawning over her, Elissa brings me forward.

  "Erika, I'd like you to meet my best friend, Joshua Kane. "

  I hold out my hand, and Erika shakes it. "Nice to meet you, Josh. Super outfit."

  I laugh. "You, too. Both the outfit and the meeting." She's intimidating but warm. In that respect, she reminds me a lot of Elissa. Attractive, too. It makes me wonder why she's here alone.

  She chats with everyone about what they've been up to since graduating, and it's interesting stuff. Zoe spent some time organizing performances with underprivileged youth, which didn't gel at all with my image of her, and Connor did a Taiwanese movie in which he had to speak his entire role in Chinese.

  When Ethan and Erika strike up a conversation about a Shakespeare festival he's about to appear in as Hamlet, I move over and hold out my hand to Connor.

  "Hey, man, we haven't met. I'm Josh."

  He takes my hand and smiles, and I get the feeling he's had more than his fair share of liquor tonight. "Connor. I saw you briefly at the wedding but didn't get a chance to say hello. Those were some pretty sweet moves you made on the dance floor."

  "What can I say? I have a gift."

  Cassie comes to stand beside me, and Connor's smile falters for a second before he says, "Good to see you, Cassie."

  Cassie smiles. "You, too."

  His girlfriend sidles up to him and hands him a beer before gripping his arm possessively.

  "Josh, Cassie," Connor says. "This is Ava."

  She smiles at us, but it's as fake as Marco's Elvis wig.

  "Nice to meet you, Ava," Cassie says. "Great costume."

  There's a slight twitch to Ava's eye when she says, "Thanks. You, too."

  If Cassie notices Ava doesn't like her, she doesn't let on. There are a couple of seconds of awkward silence when we're all just staring at each other, before I break the ice by saying, “So, are you an actor too, Ava?"

  "No," she says in a curt tone. "I'm a bartender. Before Connor and I got together, he was one of my best customers. Used to come into the bar every night." She gives him an affectionate glance, and Connor smiles down at his beer before taking a mouthful. Then he sways a little.

  Yep. If the boy doesn't want a major hangover tomorrow, he's going to need to stop drinking now.

  When he looks over at Cassie, I almost feel sorry for him. It's clear he has it bad.

  "So, Erika," Jack says. "Do you miss us? Be honest. We were your favorite class ever, right? I mean, just look at the amount of awesome in this group. It's off the charts."

  Erika smiles. "You were certainly one of my most challenging classes, Mr. Avery, that's for sure. However, between the bickering, Ethan and Cassie's relationship dramas, Zoe's constant requests for bigger roles, and your propensity to leave whoopee cushions on random chairs every second day, I admit that the lack of hijinks in subsequent classes has been ... nice."

  Connor pushes his cowboy hat farther back on his head. "Yeah, but nice boring, though, right? It's safe and forgettable. Like me. But you'll sure as hell remember Ethan Holt, because he was a giant pain in your ass."

  We all laugh, but I don't miss Cassie's confused expression.

  "It's true," Erika says. "I've yet to meet a student quite as volatile and opinionated as Mr. Holt, but lucky for him, being a pain in the ass can sometimes be endearing."

  Ethan gives a shrug. "Lovable asshole. That's me."

  "Well, you've got the asshole part right," Connor mumbles under his breath.

  Damn, son ...

  Thank God Ethan's too busy bantering with Erika to hear it. I can't imagine he'd need much of an excuse to start pounding on the
dude who spent a significant amount of time between his beloved wife's legs. Or maybe that's just me. I've yet to meet one of Angel's ex-lovers, but I can't imagine it would be a pleasant experience.

  "Holy shit." Ava stares open mouthed as Liam joins the group. He greets Erika then puts his arm around Elissa and kisses her cheek.

  "Is that Liam Quinn?" Ava says, star struck. "No way."

  "Yes, way," I say. "The Stallion, in the flesh. But with clothes on."

  She's not the only one who does a double take. Jack goes as white as a sheet, and Zoe looks like she's about three seconds away from a full-on head explosion.

  Man, did they really not see him at the wedding? Maybe my dad's right. Our generation does need to look up from our cell phones every now and then.

  Elissa introduces Liam to everyone, and it could be my imagination, but I swear he winces a little as he shakes their hands. The big lug probably pulled something lifting me. I did warn him.

  "So, Jack," I say, never one to miss an opportunity to stir the pot. "Why don't you tell everyone who you've come as tonight?"

  Jack glances at Liam and gives a nervous chuckle. "'Come as'. I see what you did there. But, nah, I'm good. Thanks."

  "Oh, come on," Elissa says, looking him up and down. "I was wondering what you were. Ooh, I've got it. You're a Fun Guy!" Everyone looks confused. She points to his hat. "Mushroom? Fungi? Get it?" When everyone groans, she gestures to the waiter for more drinks. "Man, you guys are lame. Shots, please."

  "Actually," I say, "he's a giant dick. See, the mushroom hat is the head, his body's the shaft, and the fuzzy slippers are the balls. Clever, right?" I nudge Elissa. "Out of everyone, you should recognize exactly what he is. God knows, you see it enough."

  Jack swallows as Elissa stares at him with dawning horror. "Oh, no, Jack Avery, you did not come as Liam's dick."

  Jack giggles. "Well, not yet, but play your cards right—"

  "Jack!" She slaps his arm. Hard.

  I cover my smile with my hand. Lissa's kind of adorable when she's tipsy and pissed. I think Liam's of the same opinion, because he doesn't seem the least bit upset. Instead, he's watching enthralled as his woman fixes Jack with her most withering gaze.

  "Now, Elissa, calm down ..." Jack says, trying to laugh it off. "No need to get testes."

  Connor snorts and takes another swig of beer. "Testes. Good one."

  Liam clears his throat and attempts to look angry. "She has every right to be pissed, dude. That costume's not cool with me, either. You're way too small to play my dick."

  Zoe snorts. "At least he didn't come dressed as your girlfriend's boobs. God knows he's gawked at those pictures enough to draw them from memory."

  Now Liam does look angry. He scowls at Jack. "Dude!"

  Jack throws up his hands. "It's not true! I've told Zoe a million times, I was reading the articles." He whispers to Zoe, "And even if I was looking at her boobs, you have no reason to be jealous. You have great tits, too."

  "Ha!" Zoe says. "As if I'd ever be jealous over you, Jack."

  Ethan steps away from Erika and holds up his hands. "Hey, guys. Let's just cool it, okay?"

  "That's right, Holt," Jack says. "If you tell her to calm down, she'll listen. After all, she thinks you're God's freaking gift, even though you've shown zero interest in her since day one."

  "Not true," Zoe says. "Holt's kissed me seven times."

  Cassie's face turns read. "Only in acting class. Or in shows. Never because he chose to."

  Jack crosses his arms. "I rest my case."

  Zoe slaps his arm. "Shut up, Jack!"

  "You're lucky he never showed interest in you," Connor mutters. "It's worse when you get to have them, only to find they don't want you back."

  All of a sudden, all eyes are on Cassie. She throws up her hands. "Connor, what the hell?"

  "Don't you dare speak to him like that," Ava says. "He loved you, and you destroyed him to go back to a guy who'd dumped you, twice. That's insane."

  "Ava, that's enough." Connor looks horrified, but he started it.

  I have no goddamn clue what happening right now.

  Jack looks between Cassie and Ava and rubs his hands together. "Ladies, if you want to settle this, I can get a kiddy pool filled with jello here within the hour."

  "Shhh," Zoe hisses. "Let Ava talk. Cassie's finally getting roasted for hogging the two hottest guys in our class."

  Jack's face turns serious. "That's bullshit, Zoe, and you know it. After me, Holt and Baine are second and third hottest, at best."

  Cassie's about to say something when she notices Erika watching them with tears in her eyes.

  "Erika?" Cassie goes over to her, but Erika waves her off. "Hey, what's wrong?"

  In a second, all the petty squabbles are forgotten, and everyone is united in checking to see if Erika's okay. When she notices the attention, she laughs. "I'm sorry. This is silly."

  "What is it?" Jack asks, sincerely concerned. "Did we say something to offend you?"

  "I'm fine. I've just ..." She looks at her ex-students and smiles. "I've just missed you all so damn much. It's fantastic to see you bunch of drama queens again."

  ···

  As the group around Erika continues to reminisce about their time at The Grove, I tune out and wonder if I can sneak away to call my girl. I feel like an outsider listening to their shared experiences, and I'd rather find a quiet corner and talk to Angel. Of course, finding a quiet corner around here might be a challenge.

  As I glance around the huge room, my gaze involuntarily lands on the girl in the Star Trek uniform again.

  Seriously, Kane? You mentally freak out over your girlfriend spending time with her co-star, and then you have the balls to lust after a stranger because she's wearing a short skirt?

  Lame.

  When I see who's standing next to Sexy Uhura, I stop dead in my tracks.

  I nudge Elissa. "Hey, look." I point to the guy wearing a slick dinner suit. "Isn't that Daniel Eastman?"

  Elissa follows my gaze. "Holy shit! What's he doing here? I didn't realize Marco knew him."

  Before Liam Quinn claimed the title of King of the Hollywood hunks, Daniel Eastman held the crown. He became a huge star playing an international spy in the Edward Stiles movies when he was younger, and even now he's still a major box office draw. Sure, he has a few more wrinkles these days and is sporting some grey around his temples, but even I can objectively say he's an attractive dude.

  Elissa grabs my arm. "Marco's bringing him over. God, Liam is going to lose his shit. Eastman is his idol."

  "Everyone," Marco says, as he arrives at our little group. "I have a special guest for you all to meet, and I'm sure I don't need to introduce him."

  When they see who he's talking about, their jaws hit the floor. Daniel stands next to Erika and smiles at us. "Evening, all. Sorry about the formal wear. Just came from a stuffy dinner. Having a good time?"

  "My God," Jack whispers. "It's actually him. A bonafide living legend in our midst."

  Daniel holds out his hand, and we all just stare, too intimidated to move. "I won't bite, you know."

  That breaks the ice, and we all nearly fall over ourselves trying to say hello. Liam is extra enthusiastic.

  "It's an honor," he says as Daniel shakes his hand. "You're the reason I wanted to become an actor. I've watched all your movies dozens of times. You're the master."

  "Ditto to that," Ethan says. "My favorite is Twice Dead. Total classic."

  As everyone breaks into excited chatter about their favorite Eastman movies, Marco turns to Erika, who seems shocked into silence.

  "Darling," Marco says. "You remember Daniel, don't you?"

  She flashes Marco a look before holding her hand out to Daniel. "Of course. How are you?"

  Daniel brings her hand up to his mouth and kisses it. Wow, this dude is smooth.

  "Better for seeing you," he says, standing close to her. "You look ... breathtaking."

  They stare at each other
for a few seconds, and it's clear there's a truckload of sexual tension parked between them.

  Interesting.

  Erika's the first to break eye contact, and after she pulls her hand back, she takes in a shaky breath. "If you'll excuse me, I see someone I must speak with."

  Daniel seems to deflate as she leaves.

  Okay, this is intriguing. Why am I the only one taking notice?

  A few months ago, Daniel was involved in a messy divorce from his wife of twenty years. It was all over the papers. Insiders said his wife took him to the cleaners, and Daniel just rolled over and took it. There were whispers of infidelity with some of his younger co-stars, but judging from this exchange, I wonder if his mistress might have been someone closer to his age.

  "Danny," Marco says. "You don't seem to have a drink. Let me remedy that. What will you have?"

  Daniel keeps his eyes on Erika until she disappears into the long hallway on the other side of the room. "I don't care what you give me, but make it a double."

  FOUR

  Green-Eyed Monster

  As the clock ticks closer to midnight, the party buzzes with excited energy. People are laughing, drinks are flowing, and even though no one is sloppy drunk, we're all at the stage where our inhibitions are fading, and our verbal filters have gone home for the night.

  "I mean, you've seen the guy, right?" I say to Elissa as we sit side by side on a long, leather couch. "Do you think I'm crazy being paranoid about him?"

  She nods. "Yes."

  "Like, is it crazy to think they might be rehearsing a sex scene in her apartment one night, and OOPS, all of their clothes fall off, and they accidentally fuck?"

  "Yes, it's crazy," she says emphatically. "That would never happen."

  "How do you know?"

  "Because I know Angel. And she's so nutso in love with you, she'd never even look at another guy." Her phone dings, and she checks the screen. "Well, speak of the devil. Here." She passes me the phone. "She's sent you pics."

  I smile as I see her stunning face on the screen. Her smile is so dazzling, it could light up Manhattan.

  She's taken a selfie with the Sydney Opera House in the background, and she wasn't lying when she said it was a gorgeous day down under. The sky is clear blue, and from what I can see of the yacht, it's one of those luxury jobs with all the bells and whistles.