by Steph Post
They found The Palms about three miles off the highway, on the outskirts of town. It was wedged in-between two other motels and all of them looked like they housed more permanent residents than travelers. Across the road was a package lounge, an adult superstore, and a KFC with an empty parking lot at seven in the evening. When they pulled up to the motel, a domestic squabble was playing out in the doorway of one of the rooms between a fat man in a pit-stained undershirt and an emaciated Puerto Rican girl in pink high heels and a tube dress hiked awkwardly up on one thigh. James didn’t give them a second look. He didn’t care. He had given Marlena some cash, and she came back with two keys for rooms on the backside of the building, facing the tiny pool.
He had slept hard, despite the uncomfortable bed. But now he was wide-awake, listening for the nasal sound of Rabbit’s breathing from the double bed next to his. James kicked off the thin, starchy sheet and fumbled for the light switch on the wall between the beds. By the time he found it, he already knew what he was going to see: an empty bed. Rabbit was gone.
“Goddammit!”
James pushed himself out of the bed and pulled on his wadded-up jeans. He struggled into a T-shirt and grabbed his wallet and cell phone from the top of the broken TV. The bathroom was dark and the door open, but he checked just in case. A palmetto bug cowering behind the toilet was the only occupant. He took out his cell phone and called his brother, but it went straight to voicemail. He searched around for the motel key, but realized Rabbit must have taken it. Then another realization dawned on him. He pulled his wallet out of his back pocket and opened it. There had been three hundred dollars in twenties left after he had paid for the room and a bucket of fried chicken. Like Rabbit’s bed, his wallet was empty.
James kicked the wall, leaving a dark scuffmark, and then regretted it. Marlena was in the next room over. He didn’t want to wake her up if he didn’t have to. James found his duffle bag, checked to make sure that the .45 had bullets and stuffed it into the back of his jeans before pulling on his jacket. He glanced at the clock radio on the nightstand. It was just past midnight. Rabbit couldn’t have been gone for more than three hours at the most. James quietly shut the motel room door behind him and walked down the open, cement hallway, past the ice machine, to the half-empty parking lot. Fortunately, Marlena had held onto the keys and the Jeep was still there. James glanced around the parking lot, but it was deserted.
The clerk at the all-night package lounge across the street was of no help. The large, doughy man with a scraggly neck beard didn’t even look up from the newspaper he was reading when the bell on the glass door rattled. James scanned the store, bathed in blinding, flickering fluorescent light, before he approached the clerk behind the counter.
“Excuse me?”
The clerk didn’t look up.
“You believe this shit?”
He pointed to one of the personal ads in the paper.
“Single white female seeks divorced white male for long-term relationship. Enjoys shopping, sushi, and movies. Social drinker, non-smoker, refined taste.”
The clerk smacked his hand down on the paper and looked up at James.
“What’s a woman want with a divorced man? What kinda kinky routine is that? ‘Less she already wants him broke in. Probably wants him rich, too. And what the hell is sushi?”
James patiently answered.
“I think it’s some kinda fish.”
The clerk looked contemplatively back at the paper.
“Oh. Well, I been known to fish a time or two. Might have to give this one a call.”
He folded the newspaper in half and smoothed it out.
“And what’d you want, anyway? You want something from behind the counter or what?”
“I’m looking for my brother.”
The clerk stood up and made a point of surveying the store.
“You got eyes. You see somebody in here?”
James took a deep breath and tried again.
“I can see that he’s not in here right now. I’m wondering if he might of come in earlier. Maybe an hour or two ago.”
The clerk thought about it a moment.
“Real tall? Dark hair? Kinda girly looking?”
“Just the opposite.”
“Can’t help you then. That’s the only one been in here since near eight o’clock. Little fruity, if you ask me.”
James thanked the clerk, who ignored him and unfolded the newspaper again. The door slammed shut behind James and he stood in the parking lot, wondering what to do next, when a woman with a bruised cheek covered in flaking makeup walked across the road from the motel and approached him. She was disappointed that James wasn’t looking for company, but didn’t mind having a conversation with him for free.
“What, that jumpy little fella? You two related? You don’t look like you related.”
“Unfortunately, we are. So you’ve seen him?”
The woman unashamedly picked at her underwear through the back of her see-through dress and nodded.
“Sure. He come down here maybe an hour ago. Real high-strung, that one, huh? I’m just saying, he looked like he could use a cold shower or something. Speaking ‘bout a mile a minute, too. I could hardly hear what he was talking ‘bout.”
“But you did?”
“Yeah, finally. Wanted pills, you know. I sent him down the road to Bodie’s place. Well, it’s his sister Oveta’s place really, but the way you hear him tell it, he owns the whole damn street. Acts like he’s some kinda gangster, but I swear, that man can hardly button his own pants up. You think a girl looks like me should have to put up with that shit?”
“I try to stay out of other’s relationships. You said he went down the road?”
“Yeah. It ain’t far at all. Which is another thing Bodie ain’t got going for him. Got no incentive to get off his lazy ass and get me a car, so I’m stuck in this dump all day and night. Ain’t exactly the Taj Mahal.”
James didn’t even try to look sympathetic. She finally gave up and pointed at the road running alongside the motel, perpendicular to the highway.
“Just go on that way. Can’t be more’n three quarters of a mile. There’s a couple houses down there, but look for the one that got Christmas lights still on it. Oveta’s so dumb she don’t even know you supposed to take ‘em down, or at least turn ‘em off, by the end of January. She got lit up reindeer still in the yard and everything. I don’t know which one’s more retarded, her or Bodie.”
James nodded and thanked her. She called after him as he was walking away.
“And you tell that dumbass man of mine he better show back up here with something I don’t gotta smoke. He knows I got asthma problems, but he acts like he’s too stupid to remember. Keeps showing up with that weed when he’s sitting back at his sister’s on a pile of pills he don’t want to share. Just selfish.”
James kept walking, but gave her a thumbs-up sign over his head. There were no streetlights on the road, but the moon was half-full and bright overhead. James followed the broken yellow line down the middle of the asphalt and looked up at the crisp stars. He wondered what Marlena thought about when she stood out in the dewy grass at night and watched the sky whirl above her. When she had told him about doing that, he could imagine the edges of her face in the starlight. He wondered if she stood with her arms at her side or held out, as he had often done when he was a child looking up into the cosmos. He wanted to watch her watch the night.
~ ~ ~
Rudolph wasn’t the only lawn ornament glowing in the darkness. There was a snowman lying on its side, but still lit up, and a plastic Santa Claus that had been kicked in the face. They looked like they had been there for a while, not just since Christmas. A string of colored lights blinked on and off along the railing of the sagging front porch. From the street, James could hear thrash metal playing inside. There were no cars parked in the yard, though, so James didn’t think it was a party. It was just a weeknight at the fun house. A ragged cat hissed at him and ran
around the side of the house as he stepped onto the porch. He felt the pressing weight of the gun against the small of his back as he knocked on the door.
After a dozen knocks that turned into bangs, the music turned down slightly and the door opened a crack. A man’s face appeared, with long hair halfway covering the one eye that James could see.
“Are you Bodie?”
“No. Who the hell are you?”
James ignored the question.
“It don’t matter if you’re Bodie or not. I’m looking for my brother.”
“Haven’t seen him.”
James held out his hand to measure Rabbit’s height.
“He’s ‘bout this tall. Blond hair, blue eyes. Twitchy. Someone told me I could find him here. He was probably looking to buy some oxy.”
“How I know you ain’t no cop? Or one of Redford’s boys trying to steal our score again?”
James had a feeling that the man behind the door had a gun in the hand he couldn’t see.
“First of all, I have no idea who Redford is. I’m not even from ‘round here, just passing through. Second, I look like a cop to you?”
The door opened wider. James could see that the man with the stringy hair in his face was indeed holding a gun in his other hand. James could also see that his hand was shaking and covered with what looked like scratches from a cat. One of his eyes was slightly off, straying a little to the left, and both were bloodshot with swollen lids. A woman came up behind him and leaned over the man’s shoulder to see what was going on.
“Well, hey there, baby. You looking to have a good time?”
She stepped in front of the man and pushed the door open all the way, inviting James in. He stepped past the man into the living room.
“No. I’m just looking for my brother, that’s all.”
The woman was tall and looked anemic. Her tight tube top outlined her ribs more than her breasts and her shoulder length hair was dirty blond and greasy. Even from two feet away, James could tell that it needed to be washed. A noxious odor was coming off her, a combination of stale menthol and fermenting armpits. She reached out and brushed something invisible from James’ jacket. She let her fingers linger there and James tried not to recoil.
“I got a brother. Not good for much, but if you need him, you can have him.”
Her eyes rolled slightly back and she had to keep shaking her head to stay focused on James. She pointed over at the man who had opened the door. James saw that he had put his gun away and was now busy digging a long, brown fingernail around the bottom of an empty plastic sandwich bag. James stepped back from the woman.
“Are you Oveta?”
“You got it, baby.”
She swayed as she smiled at him. Both of her canine teeth were missing and one of the front ones was gray. James swallowed and tried to keep his cool.
“Well listen, Oveta, I’m only looking to get my brother, and then I’ll get outta your hair. Is he here?”
Oveta gave him a dumb cow look for a moment and then she brightened up.
“Small dude? Pale all over, kinda? Looks almost like some kinda Disney animal or something?”
“Well, I don’t know ‘bout that. But yeah, sounds like Rabbit.”
“Rabbit!”
She snapped her fingers and then pointed them in James face.
“That’s exactly what he looks like. Just like a little bunny rabbit. Kinda like you might want to pet him or something.”
Oveta swayed again and grabbed onto James’ arm for balance.
“You know, like that bunny in that one Disney movie. The one ‘bout the deer. Bodie, what was that bunny’s name? Thumpy? Thumper?”
James shook her off. He was losing patience.
“Is he here or not?”
Oveta stared at the wall behind James and thought about it a moment. Finally, she jerked her head toward a hallway leading out of the living room.
“I think he’s in the back. Come on, I’ll show you.”
She went to grab his hand, but James moved quickly and strode down the dim hallway with Oveta trailing behind him. Olive green wallpaper peeled from the walls, and the first two rooms he passed were dark and empty. Oveta came up close behind him, her cracked lips almost on his neck.
“That last one there. That’s the party room. I ain’t seen him come out since he been here, so he must be having himself a right good time.”
The door was halfway open, but James kicked it so that it banged against the wall and reverberated. The room was lit only by a lamp on the floor in the corner with a dim bulb and no shade. Like the rest of the house, the floor was only rough boards and the walls were covered in the same ripped wallpaper as the hallway. It looked like someone had tried to remove it from one wall, but never finished. Two couches were pushed up against the walls, and one had recently been puked on. A girl, whose pink wig was slipping from her forehead, lay curled up on the couch next to the puddle of vomit, one arm dangling down to the floor. Rabbit, sitting upright, but with his head down on his chest, occupied a corner of the other couch. He raised his head when the doorknob smashed into the wall, and it took him a second for his eyes to focus on James. He grinned and then, realizing the situation, his eyes went so wide they seemed to bug out of his head.
“James! What’re you doing here?”
James stomped over to him and grabbed his brother by the arm.
“Getting your sorry ass outta here.”
Rabbit tried to pull away as James yanked him to his feet. Oveta stood in the doorway, trying to process what was going on.
“Now, just hold your horses a hot minute.”
Rabbit pulled away from James and stood up, holding onto the arm of the couch. James stood squarely in front of him, clenching and unclenching his fists. Oveta piped up from the doorway.
“Is something wrong?”
James didn’t look at her, but spoke over his shoulder. His eyes bored into Rabbit.
“No. We’re just leaving.”
Rabbit felt around the side of the couch for his jacket. James never took his eyes off him. He wanted to kick him while he was down, kick him right in the ribs, so he turned and pushed past Oveta before he hurt his brother. He could hear Rabbit scrambling after him, bumping into the doorjamb and cursing as he pinballed down the hallway. James was at the front door when he heard the woman’s voice calling after them.
“Wait! I thought you was gonna buy a whole bottle. That’s what you said when you come in here.”
Rabbit caught up to James, zipping his jacket and stumbling over a cat that had twisted its way around his legs. Rabbit started to speak to Oveta, but James cut him off.
“Did he pay for what he already took?”
Oveta pursed her lips, annoyed.
“Yeah. But he said he was gonna buy a whole bottle ‘fore he left. That’s what he said.”
James grabbed Rabbit by the shoulder and pushed him out the front door ahead of him.
“Well, I’m sorry, but he lied.”
They could hear the woman calling them assholes as she slammed the door behind them. James held on to Rabbit’s shoulder until they got out of the yard. He was walking so fast it was hard for Rabbit to stay with him. He kept tripping over chunks of broken asphalt as he struggled to keep up. James was using his legs so he wouldn’t use his fists. Rabbit finally ran and caught up with him, wheezing in-between words.
“You could at least let me buy a couple more.”
James kept his head straight, his eyes glued to the yellow line down the center of the road. He couldn’t look at his brother.
“What, with my money?”
“I was gonna pay you back. Here, here’s what I got left.”
Rabbit held out a wad of crumpled bills in his sweaty fist. James grabbed the money without looking at it and stuffed it into his pocket. He still hadn’t slowed down. Rabbit stopped in the middle of the road, bent over with his hands on his thighs. He sucked in mouthfuls of air, waiting for James to stop and turn around.
“You think maybe we could walk just a little bit slower? I don’t see where the fire is.”
James turned and walked back to Rabbit, his fist raised. Rabbit flinched, but James didn’t hit him. Instead, he grabbed Rabbit’s jaw and drew his head up so he could see Rabbit’s eyes. They were bloodshot and wild, darting back and forth.
“Is this all some kinda game to you? You think we’re in some kinda movie or something? Marlena’s back at the motel alone.”
“She’s a big girl. She can take care of herself.”
Rabbit jerked away from James’ grasp and started walking again. James fell in beside him, going slower this time.
“Rabbit? Why the hell you think we’re out here?”
“On the street?”
“No, dumbass. In the goddamn panhandle of the state. Because of you. You and your mindless, brainless idea of getting involved in some kinda make-it-rich crime scheme. You, with your ideas of cash and your drugs and your wannabe gangster attitude. Jesus Christ, I must be outta my mind for helping you.”
Rabbit kicked at a shard of broken glass.
“It ain’t just me.”
“Oh really? So I’m out here with you because this is my idea of a vacation or something?”
“It’s Marlena, too.”
James stopped walking.
“What did you say?”
Rabbit kept going, forcing James to follow him.
“It’s her daddy that screwed everything up by taking that money in the first place. If you weren’t trying to score with her, you’d see that.”
James swung in front of Rabbit and grabbed him with one hand by the collar of his shirt. He pulled Rabbit in close to him.
“You disrespect her again and, so help me God, I will personally deliver your ass to those alligator, or crocodile, or whatever they want to call themselves, idiots. Do you understand me?”
Rabbit nodded, looking as far in the opposite direction as he could. James could feel the sweat from Rabbit’s shirt against his fingers. He let go and pushed Rabbit away from him. They walked in angry silence back to The Palms. When they turned the corner at the ice machine, James saw Marlena leaning in the doorway of her room, smoking a cigarette. She didn’t say anything, just blew a stream of smoke out of the corner of her mouth. When they reached her, Rabbit dug the key out of his pocket and fumbled with the door to their room.
