Cities of Rust

by Ariel Bonin

  "I don't know. Would you take the wheel in case we need to get out of here in a hurry?" Andrew asked the dark-haired woman.

  "Sure," she replied, getting out of the car to come around to the driver's seat.

  Andrew indicated for Lindsey and Zoey to go with him.

  "Stay close and keep your eyes open. There are a lot of blind spots so don't drop your guard," he said, more so for his daughter than Lindsey.

  When they approached the three guys from the truck, Andrew saw that Charlie was covering his eyes. Darius kept his hand on Charlie's hunched shoulder and motioned to the body setting in front of them.

  "It's Eric."

  Andrew regarded the same body that had caught his attention earlier, and the realization came like a punch in the gut. The young man was slumped over, a .45 hanging out of his limp hand, with a splash of brain matter covering the vehicle behind him.

  "What happened?" Lindsey breathed, echoing the shock they were all experiencing.

  "It looks like he got bit," Dean said, pointing to a particularly bloody spot on Eric's neck, "and then he ended it."

  Andrew glanced at Charlie. He hated to have this conversation in front of him. The man had lost his son—he probably didn't want to hear it explained in detail.

  "But how did he get all the way out here?" Lindsey continued on as she looked around.

  Darius shrugged. "If I had to guess, he got bit while escaping the school and asked to be left here before he turned."

  "Is that Jake's blanket?" Zoey asked all of a sudden.

  Andrew stepped closer to Eric's lifeless form and, under a thick layer of congealed blood, was able to recognize the yellow burp cloth adorned with baby frogs. It had been folded up and applied to the gaping wound.

  Lindsey gasped. "That was the one Nadie had on her shoulder when I went in to get Jacob!"

  Andrew's mind was racing. What did that mean? He could only assume that Nadie, Jacob, Eric, and whomever else, had made it to this point and then determined it was the end of the road for the injured man. Had the others continued on to the ranch? If so, they were heading in the right direction.

  "Dad, we need to keep going," Zoey said, her voice hopeful.

  Charlie pulled his hand away from his wet eyes and, without a word, started to retrieve a tarp from the back of his truck.

  "Lindsey, take Zoey back to the car? I'll be right along."

  She nodded and guided his daughter away from the tragic scene. He looked at Charlie as the man began to lay out the plastic material for Eric's body. Andrew sincerely hoped he wouldn't be burying his own son before the day was over.

  _____

  When they pulled into the start of the ranch's long, dusty driveway, Lindsey was in awe of the two-story, cedar-shingled farmhouse, rolling fields, and overall natural beauty around them.

  "It's still standing. That's a good start," Andrew said as he peered out the hazy windshield.

  They came around a bend in the road, revealing the dirty Camaro, which was parked by the front steps of the house. Lindsey saw the screen door open, and two figures emerged onto the front porch that spanned the length of the house. Andrew stopped next to the other car and swiftly got out, Lindsey and the others not far behind. Robert and Caren remained at the top of the steps, appearing tired and worn. A distressing hush descended upon the group.

  "Are you the only people here?" Lindsey asked, even though she didn't want to hear the answer.

  Robert glanced at his wife, who was struggling to hold it together, and then nodded.

  "Just the two of you?" Andrew rasped out as his breathing quickened. Lindsey could tell he was slipping, and she frantically grasped for a way to handle what was about to go down.

  "Just us," Robert finally said.

  Lindsey watched Andrew bring an unsteady hand to his forehead, as if he were battling to comprehend a single thought.

  "Eric?" Caren asked her father, perhaps seeing something telling in his eyes.

  Charlie's lips pressed together and his steely expression crumbled. He shook his head and Caren surged down the steps.

  "Oh, God… Dad, what happened?" she asked, her strained voice shattering the agonizing silence.

  Lindsey looked to Andrew, but he was no longer next to her. She glanced over her shoulder and saw his receding form. He didn't appear to be heading anywhere specific, just away. She was okay with giving him some space, until she saw Zoey. The girl watched her father walk off and then turned to Lindsey. Zoey's eyes pleaded with her to go after him.

  Lindsey had made a promise. Now she needed to fulfill it.

  With a nervous sigh, she followed Andrew as he continued to move away from the house. His long strides kept him far ahead of her, but, eventually, she caught up with him.

  "Andrew! Andrew, stop! Please!" she hollered.

  He stopped next to an old shed and spun around. "Just back off, Kelly!"

  Lindsey stood, frozen, her eyes filled with pity and mouth slightly agape.

  "I mean, Lindsey. I—"

  She stepped toward him and he took a step back. "Call me whatever you want, but don't you dare shut me out," she begged. "Zoey needs you—more than ever! This is not the time to fall apart. I know you're hurting, but your daughter is, too. Jacob is her baby brother, and right now she needs her father to tell her that everything will be okay, that you'll figure something out."

  Andrew backed up against the worn shingles of the shed and slid to the ground. "I can't…I can't do that. Please, I need to be alone right now," he wept.

  Lindsey had seen him tear up over the course of their relationship, but it killed her to see the man she loved completely falling apart. She knew things were bad when a grown man showed such unrestraint.

  Struggling not to cry herself, she knelt in front of him.

  "I am so sorry, Andrew! You were counting on me and I fucked up!" she said, her voice wavering. "I screwed up, okay? But please, do not take this out on your daughter, because whether you realize it or not, that's what you're doing! If you need someone to blame or scream at, let it be me. If I'd only done what you had asked of me, we wouldn't be in this situation."

  Slowly, Andrew's watery gaze met hers. His eyes were an intense blue that matched the sky above them.

  "Don't put this on yourself, Lindsey. I know what it's like to have someone blame you for their missing child. I wouldn't wish that guilt upon anyone, least of all you," he mumbled.

  Lindsey blinked back tears, not of sadness, but relief. The guilt she felt from the fallout of her decisions was eating her alive. To know that Andrew didn't blame her for Jacob's disappearance took a huge weight off her shoulders, but it still didn't fix their current problem.

  "I promise that we'll find him. I know he's out there," Lindsey whispered as she squeezed Andrew's hand.

  "How you can be so sure?"

  "How can you not be? This is your son, Andrew! Kelly died bringing Jacob into this world. Don't let her death be meaningless. You can't give up—I won't let you."

  "Where are we supposed to look? I wouldn't even know where to start," Andrew answered. "They were supposed to be here…"

  "I know, and we'll stay here for as long as it takes."

  "Where the hell could they be?" he wondered aloud.

  Lindsey shrugged and shook her head. "Maybe something prevented Nadie from coming directly here. There's nothing that points to them being dead, Andrew."

  Andrew released a breath as he scratched his raised eyebrows, then gestured to her.

  "You- you're right. We'll keep looking," he agreed at last.

  Chapter 19

  Charlie and Robert buried Eric under a single Oak tree in the backyard. It was peaceful, a better place, away from the danger and trauma that awaited each and every one of the living.

  When Andrew and Lindsey made their way back to the house, Ana was sitting on the front steps, bow resting across her lap.

  "What's going on?" Andrew asked. "Where is everyone?"

  "Inside. They're di
scussing the game plan. You should probably get in there, boss," Ana said.

  Andrew and Lindsey exchanged an uneasy look and ascended the steps. He opened the screen door for Lindsey, allowing her to enter first. Everyone was positioned throughout the living room—some sitting, some standing. The one person Andrew wanted to see was his daughter. Zoey sat up straighter from her place on the couch, and Andrew gave the girl a reassuring smile.

  "So what's been discussed?" he inquired, directing everyone's attention to his spot by the door.

  "Not much," Charlie replied. "Robert and Caren took a walk around the property. As you'd imagine, the livestock's dead. A lot of our personal belongings and supplies are gone. I took a look at the generator—that's gonna be a project by itself. Once we get it goin', though, we should have enough fuel for everyone to take a hot shower."

  "Hell yeah," Darius said.

  "Got any ideas?" Charlie directed toward Andrew.

  Andrew shifted his weight and rested a hand on his gun belt. "I want to keep lookin' for Jacob," he announced, locking eyes with his daughter. "I believe he's still out there with Nadie. We should stay put for a while in case they show up. Winter's comin'—it might be a good idea to fortify ourselves here."

  "If that's the plan, then we gotta find more supplies," Charlie said, sighing, "and I know just the place."

  "Where's that?" Robert asked from the armchair.

  "The school," he answered.

  Robert looked at him like he was crazy.

  "Think what you want, but we ain't gonna last long with what we have. We take the truck, fill up on supplies, keep an eye out for Nadie and Jacob…that should cover everything."

  "When do you suggest we do this?" Darius asked.

  "I say we leave tomorrow mornin' at first light. It's a long haul, but we could do it in a day. The majority of the horde should be cleared out by then. We shouldn't let those supplies sit. The place may not be livable anymore, but the inside is a goldmine," Charlie said.

  Andrew rubbed the stubble on his jaw. "He's right. We'll get things running here, and then take a small group in the morning." He glanced at Lindsey out of the corner of his eye and was not at all surprised by her worried expression.

  "What's the sleeping situation?" Darius asked Caren.

  "Well, Robert and I will take my old room. Zoey, you can have the guest room. Ana and Darius could take Eric's..." Caren faltered and took a second to collect herself.

  "I don't mind takin' the couch," Charlie said as he fiddled with the strap of his rifle. Andrew knew what Charlie was going to say to him before he even opened his mouth. "I want you and Lindsey to take my room. I don't need that much space. It makes the most sense."

  Andrew gave him a grateful nod.

  "Thank you," Lindsey whispered with the utmost sincerity.

  "The only bed left is the ranch hand's bunk," Caren said to Dean, her face apologetic.

  "We're gonna need someone on watch at all times. I just need a place to sleep," Dean said, shrugging, as he pushed away from where he'd been leaning against the mantel.

  "Let me know when you need a break and I'll take the other shift," Darius offered.

  "That works for me."

  "All right, if everyone is set on the plan, I want to get started on that generator." Andrew waited, but no one spoke up. "Okay. Darius, could you give me and Charlie a hand?"

  "Sure thing, boss."

  Andrew wasn't sure how he felt about everyone calling him "boss," but there were worse things they could call him, so he'd roll with it.

  _____

  Later on, Andrew went upstairs to Charlie's room. Everything was as the man had left it, a spot frozen in time. There was even a small basket of clean laundry on the floor, waiting to be hung up or put into drawers. Andrew sat on the edge of the bed and tugged off his boots. His eyes continued to scan the room as sadness washed over him. He was so goddamned tired of being sad. The emotion was wearing on him, aging him basically overnight.

  Attempting to clear his mind of depressing thoughts, he glanced at the plaid bedspread under his rough hand. Even though he was happy to be able to sleep in the same bed as Lindsey now, he'd already told himself that they wouldn't have sex in Charlie's bed. To him, it felt like it would be in bad taste. On the other hand, while he strived to be respectful, he knew he was no saint.

  The sound of the shower turning on grabbed his attention. Lindsey's bag rested against the wall by the bathroom door. An idea sparked in his mind. He was desperate to feel her soft skin and heat around him. Although it occurred to him that he was essentially using her for his own benefit, all he could think about was the solace she could bring him with just her touch.

  _____

  Lindsey heard a creak as the bathroom door opened. She'd been trying her best to avoid a pathetic "Herbal Essences moment" since she had stood under the steamy spray. Her last hot shower had been months ago, maybe even a year. This moment was pure ecstasy, and she never wanted it to end.

  Unsure who else could be coming into the bathroom without knocking, she poked her head out past the curtain and gave Andrew a coy smile. "Hey."

  She was surprised to see him this early in the evening. The guys had been working hard to get everything in order, and she didn't think they would have been done anytime soon.

  Andrew simply looked at her as he began to take off his clothes. Once undressed, he pushed back the curtain and stepped into the steady stream of water. His eyes closed as the warmth spread over his skin, easing the stiffness in his neck and shoulders. When he opened them, he took in the sight of Lindsey with her wet hair and slick body.

  "Andrew?" she whispered. He still hadn't said anything to her, but the darkness in his eyes told her he was up to something.

  "I don't want to talk right now," he murmured as he slid his hands over her hips and pulled her flush against him. His hard length pressed into her belly and she felt stupid for not knowing what he had wanted sooner.

  One of Andrew's hands moved to her backside, then lower. He remembered the bold statement she'd made back at the school, and, when he found it to be true, fought to remain in control of himself. He wanted her to enjoy this as much as he was going to, but when she released an achingly sweet sigh next to his ear, he knew he was a goner.

  Lindsey let out a squeak of surprise when Andrew suddenly scooped his hands under her thighs and backed her against the wall of the shower. Without warning, he pushed into her, filling her completely. She gasped and let out a moan as he sank even deeper.

  Andrew cursed himself for losing his cool, but the instant he felt her heat surrounding him, he only thought of himself. He needed this—he needed her—and she seemed more than willing to comply.

  Water cascaded over their bodies, creating an erotic, slippery friction between them as he drove for fulfillment. Lindsey ran her fingers through his hair and brought his head forward, placing her open mouth over his. She kissed him feverishly, savoring the taste of him on her tongue. The combined sensations assaulted her body and she wasn't sure how much more she could take.

  As Andrew thrust inside her one last time, Lindsey bit back her release, whimpering instead, as she gripped his solid shoulders. He spilled himself into her and groaned harshly against her damp hair.

  Eventually, he set her down, keeping his hands on her waist to help support her weak legs. Lindsey framed his face with her hands and leaned into him as she placed a soft kiss on his parted lips. When she pulled away, she saw that he was smiling.

  "I'd say we've wasted enough hot water. Maybe we should use it for what it was actually intended for…"

  Lindsey bit her lip and gazed at him with sparkling eyes. "I don't think that was a waste at all. Hmm?"

  Andrew had to agree with her. It'd been worth every single drop.

  It wasn't until late in the evening, when Lindsey was lying in bed, that she realized the mistake they'd made.

  _____

  Lindsey was awake before the first traces of light filled their dar
k bedroom. Even as Andrew stirred next to her, she continued to stare at the ceiling as she had for the past hour. She may have appeared calm and unmoving on the outside, but inside, a storm was raging. How could they have been so careless? Especially considering what was going on with Jacob. There was no way Andrew would have made such a lapse of judgment on purpose. Did he even realize what they'd done? She felt like she was suffocating.

  As she kicked her legs over the side of the bed, Andrew stroked his hand across her lower back. She hesitated before looking over her shoulder at him. When she met his deep cobalt eyes, she saw no traces of regret or apprehension. Clearly, he did not realize what they'd done.

  "Where are you going?" he asked, his voice heavy with sleep.

  "I was going to get some air," she answered, giving him the truth.

  Andrew adjusted his head on the pillow as his brows drew together. "Is everything okay?"

  Lindsey chewed the inside of her cheek and swallowed the words she sought to say aloud. Forcing a weak smile, she said, "I'm just worried about your run to the school—and Jacob, of course."

  "Come here," Andrew whispered as he grasped her hand and pulled her toward him. He enclosed her in his arms, lifting her hair away from her neck and smoothing it down her back. "Please don't worry about the run. Zoey is staying here with you. I want her to be your main focus. You're so good with her," he said, his gaze softening.

  Suddenly, Lindsey's mind imagined the tiny life that could be starting to form inside her—a baby, their baby. Conflicting emotions flowed through her and she fought to keep her face neutral. Goosebumps broke out across her skin, drawing Andrew's attention away from her face. He rubbed his hand over her arm and pulled her closer.

  "You cold?"

  Lindsey nodded and dipped her head into the crook of his neck. She was on the verge of tears and did not want him to see them. He needed to be focused during his trip to the school. Surely, news of a possible pregnancy would distract him. He had to be sharp in order to watch the others' backs, including his own.

  They heard the reverberation of a truck door closing outside.