by Ann, Natalie
She was almost sobbing with frustration when he finally undid the button on her jeans and slid his hand inside. But he only placed his hand on her hip. Not where she wanted it, but he didn’t care.
Down the zipper went, along with her jeans. The cold air in the room formed goose bumps as he removed her jeans completely. Lips and hands slowly made their way back up her legs when he continued to massage her muscles, teasing her. His tongue came out to taste her. Everything he did caused her to squirm more, bringing her closer to the edge. She was putty in his hands, and he loved every minute of it.
“Higher, Jack. Touch me,” she ordered him roughly.
With his mouth still moving around her inner thighs, he reached up and slid one finger under the edge of her panties, feeling her wetness, making her body jerk. He knew it wouldn’t take long. Not long at all.
He edged her panties down her legs slowly, like everything else he had been doing. He started with his hands on her ankles, then moved them up her calves, knees and thighs. Ending behind her legs, he pushed her thighs apart and legs up in the air, holding her high, exposing her to him. Open, just the way he wanted.
It only took one touch, one touch of his tongue to send her exploding in his mouth. He didn’t let up, only continued to devour her when the spasms racked her body. Never giving her a chance to come down, he sent her higher and higher, her cries filling the room, showing her no mercy.
Only when he knew she was on the edge a second time, did he stop, pull back and quickly shed his own clothing and ready himself.
Grabbing both her hands, he held them over her head threading his fingers through hers, holding her tight. He kept his weight on his forearms, then gradually slid inside of her, inch by agonizing inch. It was so good to feel her surrounding him.
Placing his mouth on hers, he smothered her moans with his own, and rocked against her, pulling out and sliding back in, again and again. He brought her to the brink she loved to climb, stretched it out, then pulled back and made her wait for it again. His eyes searched hers, softness bordering on possession as he started to pick up the pace.
“Now, Jack. Please, now.” She was shaking uncontrollably with passion.
He rocked and ground against her, felt her body shake even more underneath his. His only thought was to have her fly with him. He needed to feel her tremors surround him when he came. Keeping with the pace he set, he finally brought her to the verge of freedom. Finally giving her what she wanted, which gave him what he needed.
People Die
She was almost sobbing with her release when he got up to take care of the condom. Then he came back and held her close. His hands rubbed up and down her back, trying to calm the shivers her body seemed to have.
Pulling back from his chest where he was holding her close, she reached up and placed her hand against his cheek. Feeling him lean into it more, she looked into his eyes as they softened—saw what she thought were the same feelings she had felt—and before she knew it, the words were out of her mouth. “I love you.”
He stiffened. He didn’t say a word, didn’t push off, but didn’t pull her closer either. Her eyes continued to search his for anything, any sign, but nothing came. When the tears filled her eyes, she jerked back away from him. Regretting ever saying the words.
He tried to pull her back. “Cori, wait.” He grabbed for her arm when she jumped out of bed.
“No. I’m sorry. I know you don’t want to hear that,” she said, fighting through the tears that ran down her cheeks. With jerky motions she started to pull her clothes on as she found them scattered on the floor. “Don’t. Don’t try to explain. Don’t say anything. I can see it on your face,” she cried.
Pushing off the bed himself, he pulled up his underwear and grabbed for his jeans, yanking them on. “Come here, let’s talk. We need to talk.” He tried reaching for her again.
“No. I don’t want to hear it,” she said jerking away. “I can’t hear it.” She wrenched the door open intending to leave but turned, her body shaking for a whole different reason. “On second thought, you need to hear this. I love you. Yep, I said it again. You don’t want to hear it, do you? You don’t want to feel it. Maybe you don’t feel it for me; I don’t know. I thought maybe, just maybe you were feeling the same way I was.”
“Cori, I care about you.”
“Don’t insult me. And don’t pacify me,” she yelled back at him. “You know what, Jack? People get hurt, and people get sick, and people die. It happens every day. But you can’t stop living because of it. You can’t stop loving because of it. But you want to. You’re afraid to let anyone love you. You’re afraid to let me love you.”
“Don’t tell me what I’m afraid of. You don’t have a clue what I’m feeling, or what I’ve gone through,” he stated bluntly, causing her to flinch from his words.
“Yep, you’re right. Because you never tell me, you never even give me a clue. You hold back everything, only saying what you want to say. And it’s only enough to make you comfortable. Because heaven forbid you ever feel uncomfortable again.”
She had had enough and raced down the stairs, then yanked her coat on. She fumbled to get her keys out of her pocketbook, finally pulling them out. She turned and glared at him, the tears now running unchecked down her face. “You want to be alone so much? Then fine, enjoy your loneliness. I hope you and your misplaced guilt find happiness together because one of these days you’re going to look back and realize that I was exactly what you needed in your life. And you let me go.”
***
Cori drove fast through the streets to get home. Her heart was breaking. Her breath was coming so hard and fast she could barely see through the tears running down her face.
How could she have been so stupid? She could have sworn he felt the same way. The way he looked at her tonight, the way he held her, the way he made love to her—it all felt like he loved her. Or was it because she wanted it so much that she convinced herself?
No, she was right. She knew she was right. She wasn’t stupid at all. She knew what she saw tonight. If you want it bad enough, fight for it. Didn’t she tell him that when he tried to walk out the door before? And here she was, running away, when she accused him of that very thing.
Should she turn around and fight? Or should she give him a day or so to figure it out on his own? Push and fight. The two things she said she wouldn’t do to him. Or should she walk away and hope he could figure it out?
She never had a chance to make that decision.
She saw the red light ahead, had driven these roads enough and didn’t bother to slow down as she timed the color change in her head. It would turn green by time she got there. And it did, but the headlights on the side blinded her as the car coming in the other direction plowed right into her little Mini Cooper.
***
He thought about going after her. But she was fast—out the door and pulling out of his driveway while he stood there in the doorway wearing only his jeans, watching her pull away. It was better this way. Only it didn’t feel better to him at all. It felt horrible.
He had been sitting in his recliner in the dark, staring at the TV that remained off. He didn’t feel the cold leather against his back, oblivious to the fact he was only partially dressed. He felt pain, a physical ache he hadn’t felt in years, right in his chest, burning his eyes.
Dropping his head into his hands, Cori’s words echoed in his mind, slicing through him deep, increasing the pain to a greater level.
She was right. Everything she said was true. People get hurt, sick and die all the time. But he was still alive. Though he didn’t always feel that way.
He was trying to live his life. He didn’t ask for her or the complications she brought. He didn’t ask to fall in love again.
Then it hit him. He loved her. He could fight it all he wanted, and he tried. But she had wiggled her way in just the same. Somehow she had closed all those open wounds that had lingered for years. Wounds he never thought would be healed.
Doubts, grief and guilt he never thought he would be without.
And she was right. He let her go.
Roxy was pacing around him aware something was wrong, but not knowing what to do. She finally laid her head on his thigh and he absently rubbed her between her ears.
He needed to figure out how to get Cori back, how to make her believe in him. How to make her realize he did love her. He couldn’t lose this in his life again.
He didn’t know how long he’d been sitting there when he became acutely aware his phone was ringing. Fumbling in his pocket for it, he realized he left it on his bedside table. He jumped up, took the stairs three at a time, no problem for his long legs, and hoped against hope it was Cori.
But it wasn’t. It was the hospital. Great, the last thing he wanted to do right now. But he had no choice. He listened to the information being relayed. Two-car accident, three injured, woman mid-twenties severely injured with massive head trauma, prepping for surgery now. Male, early-thirties broken leg and concussion. Female mid-twenties concussion and broken wrist, prepping for surgery.
“I’m on my way,” he stated and finally realized he was only wearing his jeans. Quickly dressing, he rushed out the door and made his way to the hospital.
***
Walking into the ER to get a status update, he saw one the nurses blocking his way. He recognized her as a friend of Cori’s, someone she often had lunch with. “Dr. Reynolds, you’re on call?” the nurse asked, looking both upset and nervous at the same time.
“Yes. Now I need to find out what’s going on,” he said dismissing her.
She only sidestepped him again, then looked around him to the other nurse at the station. “Call Dr. Smith in, also. Please.”
“Excuse me,” Jack broke in, his patience running thin. “Why are you calling in Dr. Smith when I’m already here? And I need to get ready.”
“You can’t possible want to be the one doing surgery right now?” she asked surprised, her hands shaking.
“What are you talking about?”
“They didn’t tell you? No one told you? You don’t know? You don’t know who was in the accident?” she asked a series of questions, rambling.
He finally took notice of how upset she was and the shaking of her hands, the reason she wanted to have another doctor called in. He was afraid to ask. He answered all her questions with one word. “No.”
She placed her hand on his arm. “I’m sorry,” she said, her eyes filling with tears. “It’s Cori. She’s being prepped for surgery now.”
He didn’t bother to wait for more information and found himself running.
You’re Right
“Come on, Cori, honey. Wake up. You need to wake up again.” Barbara Summers gently coaxed her daughter to open her eyes.
“No, Mom. Ten more minutes,” Cori said with a whine, blinking her eyes. She watched as her mother smiled at the exact words Cori used to say every morning when she was being woken for school.
“No more sleep. Wake up,” Barbara told her, the same that she did back then.
Cori scowled at her mother and looked around the room she was in. A different room from the one she was in when her mother woke her up the last two times. She then focused on the nurse in front of her smiling, someone she had never met before.
“How many fingers am I holding up?” the young nurse asked Cori.
“Two. I know the drill. I’m fine,” she told the nurse a bit snarky. “Let me sleep.”
“Cortland Marie, stop being such a baby,” Rose Summers said, scolding her granddaughter.
Cori turned her head toward the windows. “Nana, what are you doing here? What time is it?” she asked, noticing the sun coming through those same windows.
“Early, I don’t mind saying. Earlier than my old body wanted to get up.” Rose gentled her tone, softened her eyes. “But nothing would have kept me from seeing that you were okay with my own eyes.”
The young nurse checking Cori’s vitals ran through the basics and left the room with a promise to bring breakfast shortly.
“I want pancakes, a double order. I work here, too, so I get special treatment,” she yelled at the young nurse’s back when she walked out of the room. Everyone else in the room laughed.
Speaking of special treatment, Cori looked around the room and realized it was a private room, not a shared room. Before she could question it though, her grandmother surprised her.
“We met your man, Cortland. Oh, and what a man he is. Now I know what you see in him.” She joked with a little wiggle of her eyebrows, so similar to Cori’s actions.
“Jack? I don’t know if he’s my man anymore,” she said, the tears starting to form in her eyes. Trying to shake them off, she asked a more important question, “When was he here?”
Rose smiled patiently. “Oh dear, I believe he is most certainly your man. At least by the way he was looking at you.”
Cori turned her head to try to get a better explanation from her mother. “Mom, when was Jack here? Why was he here?”
“I thought you said you remembered the accident when we questioned you earlier?” Barbara asked with concern.
“Yes, of course I remember it. I remember everything about last night.” Even if she didn’t want to remember the hurt and pain she felt when she drove away from Jack. Or the look in his eyes when she said she loved him and how he was shocked and horrified at once. Not to mention the dread that came over her, when she knew he was going to try to pacify her, try to tell her “it’s not you, it’s me.” She didn’t want to hear it so she got out of his house as fast as she could.
“Well, dear, Jack has been checking in on you. You’re his patient. He is the one who performed your surgery. And believe me, there was quite the scuffle going on from what I hear.” Barbara turned and smiled at her husband who had remained silent so far.
Sam Summers finally spoke up, his voice sounding proud while he explained to Cori what they heard from one of the other nurses on the night shift. “Seems the hospital refused to let Jack operate on you since you are in a personal relationship. But he fought them and threatened to quit on the spot if they didn’t let him do it.”
At her shocked expression, he went on to add, “I believe he thought you might have been the other victim who is still in ICU. She may not make it. She didn’t have her seatbelt on and suffered a lot of head trauma. Anyway, he was relieved to find out you were the one with the broken wrist. He started to prep for your surgery, but the ER doctor refused to let him operate, causing quite the scene.”
“I can’t believe it. I’ve never seen Jack really angry before. Plus, all he had to do was tell them we weren’t together anymore. I mean, I don’t think we are. I don’t know. But still, it’s so unlike him to behave that way…” She trailed off, not knowing what else to say.
“Well,” Sam went on to explain further. “I believe Jack’s boss arrived and was none too happy to be called in, but put everything to rights. He said there was no reason Jack couldn’t perform the surgery. It wasn’t life threatening and he was professional enough to handle it.”
“Oh,” Cori said lamely and remained silent.
The doctor in question chose that moment to make an appearance.
***
“I think we should give these two a bit of privacy,” Sam said, then helped his mother to her feet. “Let’s go get some breakfast ourselves. We’ll be back in a bit, dear.” He nodded his head to Jack with a stare that clearly stated, ‘Don’t hurt my little girl, or I’ll hunt you down,’ regardless of the fact he was a good foot shorter that Jack.
“You look terrible,” Cori blurted.
He knew how he looked. He had dark bags under his eyes, his hair was messed up, waves in every direction since he had been running his fingers through it. He hadn’t shaved since yesterday morning and his scrubs were completely wrinkled.
“I’m surprised the hospital is even letting you work right now.”
“You’re one to talk. Have you seen yourself?”
he replied back. The bandage above her left eye was doing little to cover the large bruise forming around the seven stitches he placed there hours before. Not wanting to trust anyone else to do a good enough job, he stitched her up himself hoping to minimize the scarring the best he could.
IV’s were hooked to her right arm, feeding pain medicine to her as needed. Her body was covered by either her hospital gown or the sheets, with the exception of her other arm that was lying on top of the sheets—covered in a half cast for the moment until he could remove the stitches in another week. Then she would be casted for at least six more weeks until the bone healed.
“I’ve been in an accident. What’s your excuse?” she asked in a snarl, all the hurt coming back to the surface, he saw.
“I’ve been caring for you all night. Not to mention the other victims of the accident. Some of us haven’t slept yet.” He stopped himself. This wasn’t what he wanted to say, not what he intended to say when he came in here. He needed to get a grip. Time to start over.
“Listen,” he said, sitting on the bed next to her. He picked up her right hand, careful of the tubes hanging close by. “Don’t talk, please?” he amended nicely. “Let me say what I need to. What I should have said last night.”
When she opened her mouth, he placed his finger over her lips. “Please? Give me a chance to make it right. It’s the least you could do since I had to spend all night caring for you.” He tried to joke, but no smile reached his eyes regardless of the twitch at his lips.
“Fine,” she said fighting back her tears.
“You’re right.” He raised his eyes to hers when she made an attempt to speak again, reminding her that it was his turn. “I was afraid. I am afraid of not being enough for someone again. Of not being around to give you what you want or what you need. Of losing you because I failed. Failed you and failed myself.”
