Healing The Alpha Collection

by Jessica Ryan

  "Is something the matter?" Ciara asked, looking up from the television. Ever since Hawk had brought the short, fiery redhead home, she and Eva had become fast friends. So much so that Eva was pretty sure Rain had been giving them jealous looks inside the holding cell. That was such a nightmarish situation that Eva hadn't had time for Rain's childish behavior; she was just thinking about her own safety.

  "Hello?" Ciara asked again as Eva stared off into space. It had been such a stressful few weeks that she couldn't help but let her mind wander.

  "Sorry," Eva said, snapping back to attention. "That was Rowan on the phone. There's an angry mob down at City Hall demanding answers for what's happened the last two days."

  "Uhhh," Ciara said, the sound she usually made before she said something incredibly bitchy. "They were all hiding in their houses like a bunch of pussies while our men fought to save their sorry asses."

  "Eloquently put," Eva said with a giggle. She sat down in Rowan's old leather chair beside the couch and looked over at her new friend. "Aster's getting everyone together to call some meeting for something. He didn't really elaborate to Rowan, but according to Rowan he was pissed."

  "Poor guy," Ciara said. "He's been through a lot."

  "I really do feel bad for Aster in all of this," Eva said, nodding in agreement. "He was the one who had to step up and fight while the rest of us were captured. Did you know he killed over ten wolves the night he was captured? And, well, you saw what he did with Abaddon."

  "Then he had to face Leena and her demon down outside his house," Ciara said. "Hawk told me that was the place where Abaddon originally took her. Poor guy, he almost lost her again in the same spot."

  "Well, she's back," Eva said. "But that doesn't mean his duties as head alpha stop."

  "Isn't he the mayor of this town?" Ciara asked.

  "To humans, yes. But to the wolves he's head alpha."

  "To some wolves. Seems like a lot of these wolves think they're humans living in a human city."

  "Yeah," Eva said, looking at the floor. "About that."

  "What?"

  "Rowan's tired of it. He's sick and tired of all of it."

  "So is Hawk."

  "Really?" Eva asked. Maybe Ciara was her kindred spirit. They had both ended up in the exact same situation: mated to a strong alpha wolf. "What's he going to do about it?"

  "We're moving," Ciara said. "He's giving up his pack and we're moving to Stillwater so I can go back to school. He's even going to get a job."

  "Oh," Eva said, dropping her head.

  "What's wrong?" Ciara scooted to the end of the couch closest to Eva and leaned over, patting Eva on the thigh.

  "So you guys are staying in the city?"

  "Well, yeah."

  "Rowan doesn't want to do that. He wants to rediscover his roots and move back into the forest. He was talking about creating a den for us and maybe even making our own pack. I'm not sure how I feel about going all native or whatever."

  "That does sound pretty bad. You know I was attacked by a wild wolf before I met Hawk. Actually, that's how I met Hawk."

  "What? What happened?"

  "This crazy naked guy started chasing me through the forest. That's how I ended up leaving my camp behind. He came out of the woods. He was pretty dirty, and he was all about me. I ran, but he just slowly pursued me. It was like a game for him or something. Finally Hawk showed up and put an end to it, but I was terrified until he did."

  "He was wild?"

  "Yeah, according to Hawk at least. He said the guy probably lived out there with his pack."

  "I didn't know there were wild wolves out in the forest."

  "I guess there are."

  Eva covered her face and tried not to scream. "That means that Rowan will probably end up in some kind of turf war with them. I don't want to do that. I just want to be me."

  "Then tell him."

  "But he's so intent on it…"

  "He's not the only one in the relationship, dammit. I spent too long letting men walk all over me and get what they want! You're a wonderful girl, Eva, and you deserve to be happy. Let Rowan know that you don't want to live in a freaking cave! Hawk and I stayed overnight in a den while we were lost and it's not something I'd want to do every day."

  "He doesn't want to live in Bucklin anymore," Eva said, shaking her head. "He's made that pretty clear. He's tired of living around these domesticated wolves."

  "Don't these wolves have a bunch of money?"

  "That's what Rain told me."

  "So why don't you guys buy some land? You can have a normal house, and he can have some wilderness to shift and go run in. It's perfect!"

  "You know," Eva said, nodding her head, "that's not such a bad idea. I wonder if he'll go for it?"

  "Well, you'll never know until you try."

  Eva sat back and smiled. Ciara was a pretty sharp girl. When Eva had heard the story of her drug- and alcohol-fueled past, she had been a little shocked. Ciara seemed like a bright young girl who had her head on straight. You would never know she had had such a past until she told you. Although she was pretty damn good about putting it behind her, apparently. Eva was jealous of her strength, but now she was going to steal just a little of it to stand up to Rowan and let him know what she thought.

  I didn't have this problem when I first met Rowan, she thought. I was sassy and just fine with telling him what I thought. Why am I so afraid to now?

  Ciara was staring at Eva, studying her intently. "What's wrong?"

  "I'm just afraid to talk to him for some reason."

  "Are you afraid he'll leave you?" Ciara asked cautiously.

  Eva shook her head, trying not to even consider the possibility, but it was right there. What if he did leave her? Slowly she nodded her head.

  "Don't worry about that at all, Eva. He's not going to leave you. You're goddamn sexy and he's lucky to have you! Besides, these wolves mate for life. There's no way in hell he'd leave you over something like this."

  "I hope you're right," Eva said. "I'll talk to him about it tonight."

  "After the meeting?" Ciara asked.

  "It'll have to be," Eva said, remembering something from her phone conversation with Rowan. "Aster decreed that no humans would be allowed at the meeting."

  "Seriously? What's he got against us?"

  "I don't know. Guess he wants it to be wolves only."

  "That bastard. He doesn't have a human mate like our men. He probably thinks we're less than him or something."

  "Well, Rowan's told me he's arrogant before. Although he sure didn't seem like it yesterday."

  "No he didn't. He seemed pretty strong and in control of himself."

  "Can you imagine losing Hawk for ten years?" Eva asked.

  "No," Ciara said, shaking her head. "It's funny. I've only known him for a few days, but it feels like an eternity. I don't think I can ever be with someone else. Hawk's going to be the only man for me the rest of my life."

  "I know what you mean," Eva said, smiling. "When I first met Rowan it was because he had rescued me. Then he held me here against my will. I was sure I was going to die or be raped or something equally horrible. I wanted to get the hell out of here, but there was nowhere to go. It didn't take long, but I finally warmed up to Rowan and wanted nothing but him. Isn't that strange?"

  "Do you think it's some kind of wolf mind control?"

  Eva shook her head quickly. "What? No! That's crazy. They're not psychic or anything. They're just, well…they're perfect. They're everything you dream about in a man when you're growing up."

  "Everything I've dreamed about in bed," Ciara said as she snorted.

  "That's for damn sure," Eva said, holding up her hand for a high five. Like two teenage boys they shared a high five before exploding with laughter.

  "It's more than sex," Ciara finally said after they calmed down. "I know that. If only all men could be like a werewolf."

  "They're stron
g, loyal, compassionate and caring," Eva said. "It's almost too good to be true."

  "But you know it's not," Ciara said.

  "It might be," Eva said, feeling the wave of depression roll over her again. "It'll be too good to be true if he doesn't listen to me. I can't live in a cave. I'm not an animal."

  "He won't expect you to," Ciara said. "You're worrying too much, girl. It'll turn out great for you. Rowan cares and he'll listen."

  "You're probably right," Eva said, forcing a weak smile. "I'm worrying about nothing."

  I hope I'm worrying about nothing, she thought as she slunk down in her chair and watched TV. The only thing that kept her going was the thought of waking up next to Rowan every day. Hopefully the thought of being with her kept him going the same.

  Chapter 21

  "Are you going to come to the meeting tonight?" Rain asked.

  Beorn looked up from the spot he was occupying by the wall. Somehow he'd been dragged down to City Hall by Rain while she went about her daily work duties. They'd all known the night before that today would be hairy after the events of the weekend, but no one had expected an angry mob to show up at their doorstep.

  Rain was forbidding him from leaving and it was out of respect for her that Beorn stayed put, but he wanted nothing more than to burst out the door and begin cracking wolf skulls. Even after helping save their sorry asses and choosing one as a mate, he was still unhappy overall with the disgusting little animals.

  "No," he said, leaning back and crossing his arms defiantly. "Why the hell would I do that? I'm not a resident of this town."

  "Don't you want to hear what Aster has to say?" she said, getting up from her desk and walking over to him. Others were beginning to stare after Beorn's loud voice caught their attention, but as usual he didn't give two flying shits.

  "Why?"

  "Because it could affect everyone."

  "Except me."

  "Why are you acting like this?"

  "Acting like what? I'm just telling you how I feel. You're asking questions and I'm answering."

  "You're acting like a jerk," Rain said, stomping her foot and balling her fists up.

  "And you're acting like a child," he responded. As soon as the words left his mouth he knew that was the wrong thing to say, but it was too late.

  "What did you say to me?" she asked, leaning forward and giving him what could only be described as "the look."

  "Nothing," he said, trying to shield his eyes from ball-crushing look she was giving him.

  "That's what I thought," she said.

  Inwardly he let out a sigh of relief. Perhaps she was willing to drop it and move on. As she prepared to speak again, he knew that what was coming was so much worse. Even though he was the grumpiest and toughest bear he knew, he was powerless in front of the 105-pound female wolf who stood before him. He still wore the pants in this relationship, but they were attached by a leash to Rain's firm hand.

  "I'm still a wolf," she said. He thought he saw steam shooting from her ears, but maybe it was nothing. "And you're mated to me. That means what happens with the wolves is important to you, buddy."

  He winced. Buddy was such a derogatory term; it was so impersonal and biting. She was really hacked.

  "On top of that," she continued, barely taking any time to breathe. "You live in the forest outside of this town. What happens with the wolves affects you. You've already lost your goddamn cabin because of it. You have an entire pack of wolves willing to die for you because they think you're their alpha. You don't know if Aster is going to want to punish them or make an example of them yet. They all want to return to the wild, by the way. Are you going to let them follow you? Are we going to live in a cave with a bunch of Oakdale pack members following us around and bowing to you as alpha?"

  Beorn waited for several seconds to make sure she was done. She continued to stare at him with a fire in her eyes that he hadn't seen since they met. Clearly the pressure of the weekend had gotten to her. When he was sure she wasn't going to speak again, he stood up and walked over, putting his hands on her shoulders and rubbing them gently to try and calm her down.

  "I understand your frustration," Beorn said, trying to remain calm. It was tough for him to show compassion to another living creature, but Rain was too good of a thing for him to just give up because of his attitude. She was the only person who would ever get this kind of treatment from him. "I'm sorry that I reacted that way. It'll be okay. I'll go with you tonight and we'll hear what Aster has to say."

  "Thank you," she said, burying her face in his chest. "I'm just so worried about what's going to happen."

  "I understand," he said, now rubbing one giant paw up and down her back. "It's not fun. Things are going to change."

  "I know," she said. "I'm scared of change."

  "You can't be. Change is part of life. Speaking of change, where's my pack?"

  Rain looked up at him with a sarcastic glint in her eyes. "So they're your pack now?"

  "For now," he said, smiling. Never in a million years would Beorn have thought he'd end up as alpha of a werewolf pack, but these guys really stuck to the old ways.

  "They're in the cafeteria," she answered, pointing to a large oak door beside the stairs. "Go down that hallway and turn right. You can't miss it."

  "I need to go have a chat with them."

  "I need to work," she said sadly.

  "Hey," he said, putting his thumb under her chin and stealing a quick kiss. "I still owe you a shifted date, remember? We'll catch those trout together."

  "That sounds wonderful, babe," she said, smiling for the first time since this ordeal had begun.

  Beorn walked past Rowan, who gave him a strange look before glancing back at Rain. He studied her for a second before a content smile finally crossed his face. "I've never seen anyone calm her down that quickly before."

  "What can I say," Beorn said, shrugging. "I have the magic touch."

  "Where are you going?" Rowan asked. Even though Aster was in charge, Rowan was running the show. Aster gave the orders and Rowan made them happen.

  "To see my pack," Beorn said. He tried to maintain a complete stone face as he looked at Rowan, but it was hard not to smile when he talked about them.

  "Your pack?" Rowan asked. "So you're seriously going to take that responsibility on?"

  "Hell no, Rowan. You know me better than that. I could give a pocketful about most wolves, especially them."

  "A pocketful of what?"

  "Fucks."

  "You're truly a wordsmith, sir."

  "It comes from my mother's side. Anyway, I need to go tell these nut-huggers to get lost and get a life."

  "We're not going to let them leave this place, Beorn," Rowan said. "Not until Aster has decided what he wants to do with them. They did betray us."

  "Okay, that's great," Beorn said. "Then you can come with me and tell them that after I tell them to quit sucking on my teat."

  "What's gotten into you?" Rowan asked. "I've never heard you speak like this before."

  "I guess your daughter has gotten into me," Beorn said. "She makes me feel ten years younger."

  "Yeah," Rowan said, rolling his eyes as they both began to walk towards the cafeteria. "At least she makes you feel younger; she makes me feel twenty years older."

  "That's the difference between a father and a lover."

  Rowan stopped and turned, giving Beorn a look that would curdle blood in any normal man.

  What is with these wolves and their looks today? Beorn thought. All bluster, no action. Just like a wolf.

  The hallway leading to the cafeteria looked old, much older than any other part of the building. The floor was white tile, but it had yellowed with age, as had the walls. There were notices and city ordinances tacked on the walls and pipes ran overhead. Beorn suddenly felt claustrophobic and trapped in this place. He almost had to duck to miss some of the lower-hanging pipes as they walked. How could anyone live o
r work in a place like this? It was too sterile, too human. He felt like he was being swallowed up by the bureaucracy—a bureaucracy that had already swallowed up most of the wolves in Bucklin and turned them into an angry mob demanding justice for not defending themselves.

  What were those idiots even protesting? Beorn wasn't really sure what the problem was. Were they mad that the fight had come to their doorstep? Were they angry at their own inability to fight? Or were they just mad at the world and trying to find an outlet to vent their frustration?

  "Those wolves wouldn't be so angry if they just shifted and acted like a wolf sometimes," Beorn said as they reached the cafeteria door.

  Rowan stopped and turned back to him, a thoughtful look on his face. "You think that's the key? Eva kind of said the same thing."

  "The human is smart," Beorn said. "You deny your nature for too long and you end up losing your mind, doing things that don't make sense to anyone."

  "Like going feral?" Rowan looked disgusted at the mere thought.

  "Maybe, or maybe not. Maybe your wolf forces a shift. Or maybe, like in Rain's case, it affects your emotions to the point you can't control them. Or maybe, in your case, it affects you to the point you can't control your anger and you have to kill without thinking rationally about it."

  "Rain told you about the sheriff and the deputy?"

  "Yes. It was an unfortunate situation. I'm not sure they didn't get what they deserved. If we were living by the old ways, their lives would have meant nothing. But it's a different day and we can't just kill every human who pisses us off. Live and learn, though, right?"

  Rowan studied Beorn, his eyes travelling over the bear's bearded face like he was looking for some kind of hidden treasure. Finally he regarded Beorn with a smile while shaking his head. "I don't know how you have it so figured out, Beorn. You've always seemed to have a grasp on what you are and what you want to do. How?"

  "Simple," Beorn said, pushing past him to open the cafeteria door. "I never moved to the city and tried to be a human."

  Rowan stood behind him, dumbfounded by his comments, before finally following him into the cafeteria. There were at least twenty-five wolves sitting around in the cafeteria. Half of them were shifted while the other half were barely dressed. When they saw their new alpha walk in with the sheriff they all immediately came to attention and moved into a huddled group.