by Lexy Wolfe
"Apparently, she would like us to belive otherwise." Ellis got to his feet, going over to Zoe. "I think you need to go back to the academy and get some rest. I want to stay and speak with Nolyn and the hour is already late."
"No! I can't go! Maybe the great mother will change her mind." Eyes wild with worry, she said, "And if She does, I would be here already."
"I could tell Miss Kelafy you both will be staying the night," Marcus offered. "There is plenty of room and she wouldn't mind at all, and then Zoe could be here to watch the Swordanzen train in the morning."
Zoe's distress evaporated. "See them train?! Oh, please, Ellis? Could we stay? Please?"
The man tried to portray an indecisive look, but could not for long in the face of her pleading. "Of course. It will be educational for us both." The men could not help but smile at her joy.
"Come with me, Zoe. Miss Kelafy will give you a snack before bed. She makes the best treats ever! You'll feel better after having one of her cakes, believe me." The girl nodded and took his hand, all but dragging him out.
"He is a good boy. You chose well." Nolyn made a disagreeable sound. Ellis looked at him and reassured, "You are a doing a good job, Nolyn. It has been a considerable amount of change you have had to adapt to."
Nolyn waved his hands in irritation. "How good of a job can I be doing when I nearly get myself and my apprentice killed? I should be setting a good example, not a bad one. Especially for Marcus." Groaning, he sat heavily, head in hands. "I can't remember much of what happened. But what I do remember was telling him to run and get word to you... and then I see him hurt and I remember... I keep remembering the lupine attack in Market Circle. How I failed my guards and my journeyman."
"What happened to the others with you was not your fault! Dear gods, the sacrifices all of you were willing to make! They did not die because of you, Nolyn! But they were willing to die because you were. It was your example they aspired to, and all of you saved untold lives that day."
Nolyn rubbed his face, raising his eyes. "It still hurts."
Putting his hand on the younger man's shoulder, Ellis sighed. "I know something of loss, Nolyn. It will always hurt, just not as sharply one day." Ellis looked up, staring at memories. "I miss my brother terribly at times like this. Bennu always had a sixth sense about things. Ash inherited that, thank the goddess." Glancing at the younger man when his expression turned odd, he asked, "What is it?"
"She asked what a twin was... no one had said anything about twins." He stared at Ellis. "How did Kiya even know to ask? Or know about Master Bennu?"
Ellis frowned as he saw the anomaly as well. "That is a good question. We should—" He fell silent when the door opened, both men relaxing when Kelafy entered. "Miss Kelafy, always a pleasure to see you."
The woman chuckled as she sat the new pot of tea on the table, gathering the one gone cold. "Always the charmer, Master Ellis." Once she gathered the other cups and plates, she began pouring tea, handing the first cup to Valerian. "Please don't keep Master Nolyn up too late. One night of peaceful sleep is not going to make up for weeks of nightmare ridden nights."
"I did sleep peacefully, didn't I? I didn't dream..." Standing abruptly, Nolyn started towards the door. "I need to speak to—" He froze, staring at the doorway. "...Kiya."
The slight Desanti woman smiled as she stepped inside. "We were beginning to wonder if you were ever going to stop your chattering with Master Eptina. We do not trust her."
"Who is 'we'?" Ellis asked after he found his voice after being stunned again seeing the exotic beauty.
"Grandfather and I." She tilted her head, looking to the side. "Master Ellis, Grandfather says I should tell you he is sorry for not having trusted Ash's instincts in the first place and leaving all of you too soon." All three men stared, Kelafy gasping and covering her mouth.
"Bennu...? But how is it possible? He is..." Ellis stared, staggered by Kiya's words.
Kiya crouched in front of Ellis, clasping his hands in hers tightly. "Skyfire did not speak of Su'alin because the Path of the Spirit is the most sacred order of our people, and one he feels he betrayed. He cannot speak much on it with the objectivity needed, even to our own people." Brushing her veil back from her face, her piercing gaze was the purest gold. "Su'alin are born poised on the edge of the sword between the living and the dead. Where Swordanzen meet their challenges in this world, Su'alin do battle in the other world."
"The… other world?" Valerian asked.
The Desanti woman turned her eerie gaze to the Vodani man. "The twilight world between the mortal realm and the realm of the dead."
"But… but that is the river of time! How can you—?"
Nolyn sat heavily. "Master Bennu..."
Kiya looked at Nolyn sadly then moved to sit on the table in front of him. "Edai Magus Nolyn Lirai, you suffer nightmares because a su'dinnais has attached itself to you. They are like dinnais that feed on the terrors, fears, and hatreds of their victims. But they remain in the spirit realm, out of the reach of the Swordanzen who protect us. They leech the life force until their victims can no longer endure and go mad or simply die."
She looked down. "I sensed traces of the su'dinnais in your touch when we first met, and when I woke you. But when you awoke, it became aware of my presence and retreated from my reach from here. When you broke the connection Journeyman Tobias had to you while healing, you spared him the same fate. But it wounded his spirit." She looked up at Valerian. "It seemed strange to me that a Guardian would be unaware of such shadows. However, the spirits have told me that few of Her mortal servants even believe they can enter the other realm. I am sorry, Unsvet Guardian, for my disapproval of your handling of Healer Tobias. But he is still your responsibility, now that he has begun actively touching time."
Eyes shut, Nolyn asked dully, "Can you... help me?" He shivered when he felt her delicate hand touch his cheek.
"If you trust me," Kiya replied softly. She met his eyes, earnestly hopeful. "If I could have caught it before you awoke the last time, you would have been free before. But this one is unlike others I have faced. It is aware of me even while you are awake. I need your help to defeat it."
"My help?!" Nolyn got to his feet, pacing away from the woman seated on the edge of the low table. "What in the hells can I do? I have never even heard of this... su'dinnais?"
She followed him, cupping his face in her hands. Kiya looked into his eyes. "When a victim of su'dinnais sleeps, their spirit steps into the spirit world, and the su'dinnais is vulnerable in this one. This one is different. Stronger than most. For me to face your tormentor, I must enter the spirit world and face it in the other realm." She paused to whisper, "Through you. Given its strength and how long you have suffered, the risk of death is... high."
"Wait one minute," Ellis demanded. "You want to go into his mind? And it may kill him?! No! I will not permit you to risk Nolyn's life!"
They all flinched in shock and surprise at Kiya's tangible fury when she turned. Her brilliant gold gaze flashed in the light. "Foolish treewalker! He is already condemned to death! A long, tortuous death as he loses not only his mind but his soul! At least if we die, he will be able to live again. Better a good death than a dead soul!"
Kiya looked down sharply then up to meet Nolyn's eyes when he caught her hand. "'We'? Your life would be at risk?" He shook his head. "No. I can't have you risk your life for m—" Without warning, Kiya slapped Nolyn jarringly. Even Valerian winced in sympathy. "What the hells was that for?"
"You think you are the only one who can risk his life for others?" Kiya demanded. "Or that you are not worthy of living, even when others give their lives to save yours? I did not leave Desantiva only to find the Githalin Swordanzen. I came to find the star-warrior." Grabbing his right hand, she held it up to show him the star-shaped scar in his palm. "I came to find you!"
"Me?" Startled, he looked into her eyes.
Fuming, Kiya stated, "Do you want to risk living, Edai Magus Nolyn Lirai?" She pushed him b
ack until he sat on the couch. "Then trust me. Please."
Taking her hands in his, Nolyn managed a small smile, kissing hers knuckles. "I trust you." He blinked when she sat straddling his lap, her arms around his neck. He gasped when the world vanished in a blinding burst of light when their foreheads touched.
Chapter 42
Nolyn blinked at the surreal landscape he found himself in. At once both familiar and alien, he felt a surge of panic when the howls of lupines filled the air. "Goddess, no," he whispered, unable to move as three drooling lupine with eyes like glowing red coals were about to converge on him.
A small figure jumped between him and the giant wolves, slicing the air and cutting down two of the beasts, their forms evaporating in a black cloud. Kiya fixed a hard look on the remaining beast, wielding two single-edged blades of silver light. The woman and beast clashed again, trading blows until her weapon impaled its heart. It fell, going still before vanishing.
"Kiya?" he whispered. The golden-eyed woman turned sharply at the sound of her name. He touched bleeding scratches tentatively. "You are hurt."
"You are aware of me? Of this place? Su'alin are almost never seen by others, even when we walk through their dreamscape." She smiled, a glimmer of tears in her eyes. "Grandfather said you had a strong mind and spirit. I did not dare believe..." She sheathed the swords and took his hands in hers. "I promise you. This will be the last nightmare you have. When I free you, you will not remember any of this."
"I would never call seeing you a nightmare, Kiya na'Citali." He looked at her left shoulder where a white tattoo of a winged snake coiled. "A Swordanzen mark?"
"It is the mark of the Su'alin. All Su'alin bear this symbol of Citali's blessing. Citali is the Totani of death, and his image reflects his ability to cross the blade between life and death without harm. All of us can choose to cross the blade and be able to return. With training, we can fight the su'dinnais by slaying them on this side of the blade, or crossing the blade and confronting them there." She began to turn away, drawing her swords again..
Nolyn grabbed her and turned her back. "I remember how the Desanti speak of death. You can't die, Kiya." When she scowled, he said, "It isn't about my worth. It is about yours." He shook her shoulders. "My gods, Kiya, you are the most beautiful, amazing woman I have ever known in my life and I have barely had the chance to get to know you. I don't want to lose you now."
Kiya sheathed her blades across her back and embraced Nolyn. "I am Su'alin. I can cross the blade and return by choice through Citali's blessing. You... you cannot, Nolyn. Those I have loved and who have died in my life I know will be reborn. It is never the same, but at least they will return one day." She looked up at him and caressed his cheek. "If the hold the su'dinnais has on you is not broken, your soul will never return. I would never have the chance to know you in this life or any other. Please, let me go."
"This is... this is my life you fight for. Let me go with you," Nolyn begged. "I want to be present for this fight, even if I can do nothing but watch."
Kiya nodded, her reluctance unmistakable. "You can come to the edge of the blade, but you must not cross it. No matter what happens." She held the front of his tunic fiercely tight. "Promise me. You will not cross the blade. Even if I cannot return." Before he could respond, she demanded, "Promise me! I must know that you will live."
Nolyn sighed and nodded. "I promise."
Satisfied, Kiya turned on her heel and walked into the darkness. Nolyn hurried to catch up. The dark forest disappeared into a misty formless grey landscape. The further they went, the more cold fear seemed to close around his heart. He almost didn't notice when Kiya had stopped moving until she blocked him firmly. "This is where you must wait, Nolyn Lirai," Kiya stated.
"How can you tell? It all looks the same to me. Grey nothingness."
"That is because your have your eyes closed," she pointed out.
He frowned. "I have my eyes open. I can see you!"
She shook her head impatiently. "That is because you have already seen me in the living world. Here." She turned to him and covered his eyes for a moment. When she moved her hands away and he opened his eyes, he blinked in awe. "I have cleared your soul's eyes. Now you can see as a Su'alin sees." The grey mist had coalesced into an unreal landscape, twisted, ominous trees and jagged rocks jutting out of the ground. The ground ended in open space.
"How did you...? Is it a type of spirit magic you used to change my vision?"
"No. Any could learn to spiritwalk as a Su'alin, but usually those who have come close to the blade's edge," she indicated the cliff they stood at, "develop a natural affinity for this land between the living and the dead. Among my people, spiritwalking is not as strange as it is here. We do not fear death as northborn do. But not all open their eyes to see beyond their own dreamscape."
"Vivid dreams, as Valerian spoke of," Nolyn said slowly.
"Perhaps. Spiritwalking is done consciously, though. Dreams are different. They are…" She frowned. "They are like when I meditate, most especially when I focus on the sacred flame or another element. I can see images out of time, but it is difficult to know if they are a past truth or a future possibility."
He took her hands in his. "Su'alin Kiya na'Citali, would you teach me more of the Path of the Spirit?"
She smiled a little up at him. "You are a true son of your great mother, ever wanting to learn. If Citali approves, I will teach you about the Path. But all this will mean nothing if I cannot free you from that." At first, Nolyn saw nothing. Then as he focused, he saw a looming shape even darker than the sky around it with tentacles that stretched out and wrapped around his chest. While they did not pull, he could not break their hold on him.
"How can you fight that?" he whispered in horrified shock. "It is huge! A monster!"
"Do not allow its visual appearance to deceive you. Souls are not bound to the shapes of our bodies," Kiya replied with a small smile. "If we wish to live, we cannot keep our mortal appearance when crossing the blade, we must embrace another unearthly form. Though many Su'alin choose forms that are familiar to them or to others." She closed her eyes and stepped into the void. Her body shifted to a more ethereal, gossamer form, angelic wings unfolding from her back. Despite her scars from other encounters, Nolyn could not help but stare at the beauty of her spirit. Drawing her blades again, the Su'alin advanced on the dark form. The dream world solidified as she stepped into it, brightening the darkness where she stood.
The monstrosity in the darkness hissed threateningly as it turned its awareness on the small bright figure approaching it. It lashed out, the Desanti woman dodging out of the way and slicing the black wall. Shrieks deafened Nolyn; Kiya was undeterred.
Nolyn grunted as the battle commenced, each blow tugging at him. He collapsed to his knees, unable to catch his breath. Weakening, he struggled to continue to follow the battle when suddenly something snapped, the tentacles withered and vanished, and the draw on his life force stopped. The black form retreated, leaving an echoing emptiness behind.
"Kiya, you did it! Goddess bless, thank you." He frowned, unable to see her for a short moment. "Kiya?"
After long, heart stopping minutes, he finally spotted her. Her glow dimmed, her movements were weak. Weaving on her feet as she staggered back towards Nolyn, she collapsed to her knees. She reached out to him, her expression one of resignation. "Forgive me," she whispered.
"Kiya?" Nolyn leaned out as far as he could as she neared, trying to reach her. "Kiya! Come on, you can't give up now." He strained, reaching beyond the border. "Just get a little closer and I'll pull you back!"
Glassy-eyed, she said, "Stay... You promised..." Closing her eyes, she crumpled, her wings sagging.
"Kiya!" In growing panic, feeling himself being drawn back to his body, he looked for anything that could help him, but she was beyond his reach. "Ash held Storm to life. How did he...?" He looked at the scar in his palm and took a deep breath. "It is about what we can see that lets us manipulate it
. See the fabric of the heart, see the fabric of life." He looked up. "See the fabric of death." He held his hand out, murmuring a spell under his breath with urgency as he fought waking up, drawing her closer to his reaching hand. He grabbed her limp hand the moment she was close enough and pulled her towards him just as he awoke.
Chapter 43
Valerian, Ellis and Kelafy sat vigil over the pair locked in a battle none could see. Valerian could not help but stare, pale under the olive complexion of his people. "I do not know what she is doing, but I sense… something." He made a pained noise, grabbing his head.
At that exact moment, Nolyn was suddenly awake. He tightened his arms around Kiya as the slight Desanti woman went limp. "Kiya!" Disoriented, he flailed trying to sit up.
Ellis went to his side, helping keep Nolyn from dropping the unconscious woman. "Nolyn, are you all right? What happened?" He looked up when the study door opened.
Nolyn shook his head, ignoring Ellis and Kelafy. He patted Kiya's cheek, calling to her urgently. He tried to hold onto her as another started to lift her from his embrace. Seeker met the mage's eyes, the outright fear in the desert warrior's normally hard expression unhidden.
Seeker said in a low voice, "Edai Magus, give me my sister. Please."
"Sister?" he whispered in a daze, not noticing Ellis prying his arms from around the unconscious Su'alin.
"We will watch over her," the Swordanzen man said in a low voice. "She fought for you. Recover your strength. For her." Gathering the fragile-seeming woman in his arms, Seeker turned and strode out of the study.
Wild-eyed in panic, Nolyn reached out futilely. "No! Wait—!" Without warning, his eyes rolled back and he sagged unconscious.
"Master Ellis," Kelafy said weakly. "What do you... what do you need me to do?"
Ellis looked up. "Do you have any of that gypsy brew handy?" Kelafy nodded and hurried to retrieve the drink. Ellis looked down at Nolyn, brushing the younger man's hair as a father would his son's. "Bennu, I wish you were here."
