Fatal Exchange

by Harris, Lisa

  He didn’t want to be the one who put job before family, but that’s exactly what he was doing.

  22

  Emily watched as Mason pushed the button to end the call, clearly upset. He excused himself, then walked into the adjoining kitchen. Something was wrong. God, if something’s happened to Tess, I’m going to need you now more than ever, and Avery …

  Whatever it was, waiting was only going to prolong the inevitable. She had to know the truth. Mason stood in the kitchen, hands braced against the tiled countertop.

  Jaw tensed, Emily felt her heart pounding. “Mason … what happened? Did they find Tess?”

  He turned to her and shook his head. “No. It’s something … something personal.”

  “Something wrong?”

  “It’s nothing.”

  She shouldn’t push, but whatever had happened was clearly something. “I might still be in a state of shock over everything that has happened today, but your ‘it’s nothing’ doesn’t sound like nothing to me.”

  She watched his expression change as if he were trying to decide whether or not to tell her. He grabbed a mug from the counter and poured steamy hot liquid from the coffeepot.

  “I’m sorry. It’s none of my business. I shouldn’t have asked.”

  “No. It’s okay. I’m just having a hard time separating work and my personal life.”

  “And you’re surprised it doesn’t always work?” She raised her brow and shot him a grin. “They’re both a part of who you are. There’s hardly a day when I don’t come home worrying about one of my students. I worry about my mom while I’m at school … sometimes putting either side behind is impossible.”

  “It’s my father.” He traced the rim of the cup with his finger, paused, then reached for a packet of sugar. “I just got a call from my brother. My father’s dying. He’s at his home in Denver. Hospice has come in. They don’t expect him to make it much longer.”

  “Wow. I’m sorry.” She reached up to brush her fingers against his arm, then pulled back. Not enough had passed between them for her to feel familiar. Not enough to feel as if she’d known him forever and somehow understood the pain of what he was feeling, and yet that was how she felt. “I don’t remember your talking about your father.”

  Unlike her large extended family that celebrated yearly family reunions with first and second cousins, she didn’t remember Mason ever speaking about family beyond his brothers and his aunt.

  “My father’s been out of the picture for a dozen or so years, until my brother called me this past weekend. Told me my father had been diagnosed with terminal cancer six months ago and only has a short time left to live.”

  “Why just tell you now?”

  “Like I said, there really hasn’t been any contact for years. I guess things change when you’re on your deathbed. You want to suddenly make up for things you’ve neglected over the years.”

  “That makes sense. But it still hurts, I’m sure.”

  “Yeah.” He looked up at her, the pain evident in his eyes. “I didn’t expect to feel anything, which I know sounds cold, but he isn’t a part of my life anymore.”

  “I’d say your response is normal.”

  “Normal, maybe, but conflicting as well. Have you ever had something you thought you dealt with? Thought it was behind you and then, wham … you get hit up the back side of your head.”

  “Every once in a while I have those feelings about Michael’s death. I don’t have anyone to blame, which sometimes makes it even harder.”

  “That’s exactly what I mean.”

  “What about your father? Are you planning to go see him?”

  “I was scheduled to fly to Denver this morning. It was one of his deathbed wishes, to have his three boys together again. But when Rafael came to me this morning, I knew I couldn’t just walk away from him. And then … well … you know the rest of my day.”

  “So you’ve been having to choose between two crises all day today.”

  “Yeah.”

  “How long has it been since all of you were together?”

  “I see my brothers as often as I can, but with our work schedules it only works out to be once or twice a year. We talk on the phone and Skype, but it’s not as much as I’d like.”

  “And your father?”

  “He walked out of our lives a long time ago. Remarried. Twice. Moved away. It was a relationship that over the years I learned to accept I would never have.”

  “Do you want to see him again?”

  “I don’t know. In some ways it was easier when I was seven and didn’t have a choice as to who walked in and out. The choice was never up to me. But now … to be honest, I don’t know what I want.”

  “What happens if you go?’’ She’d always been one to analyze the problem. Fix it if she could. To try to let it go if she couldn’t. Not that life always fell into that simple of a package, but it was a place to start.

  “If I go? I see my brothers and my father. I find out why it was so important that I show up. And then … and then I guess it’ll be over.”

  “What happens if you don’t go?”

  “If I don’t go?” He paused. “Not going and dealing with my father would be the easy way out, but …”

  She waited for him to continue.

  “Honestly, if I don’t go, I know I’ll regret it. Regret not being there for my brothers. Maybe one day regret that I didn’t give my father one last chance.”

  “Maybe you have your answer then.”

  He chuckled. “You make it seem so simple.”

  “It’s not simple, it’s just important to look at things both ways. To try to temporarily look past the emotion of the moment that can blind us. My father always made me do that when I had a choice to make. Some situations really were simple. And others … like yours … not so much.”

  Her gaze flicked past Mason to the window overlooking the backyard, where another inch of snow had fallen in the past hour. She’d had to ask herself the same questions before calling off her wedding with Charlie, and had discovered that the price to marry him was far greater than she was willing to pay. Life’s choices were rarely completely black and white, and it wasn’t always easy to follow through once a decision was made.

  “Did your father teach you how to forgive as well?” he asked.

  “That’s another issue I struggle with at times.”

  “I think my not being able to—or wanting to—forgive my dad is the real barrier to my going. It’s something I’ve had to face since giving my life to Christ. I know I’ve been forgiven, but learning to forgive someone who spent his entire life ignoring me … that’s tough.”

  “What kind of memories do you have of him?”

  “Most are better off forgotten. The last good memory I have is of him taking me and my brothers to a baseball game when I was seven. I was so excited. He’d just gotten a good-paying job—jobs were few and far between—so he bought hot dogs, popcorn, cotton candy … anything we wanted.”

  “That’s why saving Rafael was so important to you.”

  His eyes narrowed. “Yeah. Rafael grew up a lot like I did. Single parent, few options to get ahead.”

  He was giving her a chance to understand him on a deeper level. Allowing her to see a side of him she’d missed all these years. “What happened today wasn’t your fault. You did everything you could to stop it.”

  “But what about the next Rafael? Sons need their fathers. They need that relationship with them.”

  Emily mulled over his question. There simply weren’t any easy answers. “I’m not the cop here, but I know with my own job it didn’t take me long to figure out that I can’t save them all. No matter how hard I try, no matter what I do, there are going to be some who walk away and leave me feeling as if I’ve failed to make the impact I wanted to make.”

  “Maybe that’s why I was always a bit envious of Michael’s relationship with your father.”

  “Trust me, our family is far from perfect, but I
hope I never take for granted what I have, because I know it’s becoming more and more of a rare thing.”

  “To come from a two-parent family was almost unheard of when I was growing up. You grew up fast. Learned to make it on your own.” He leaned back against the kitchen counter, hands in his jacket pockets. “I’m not sure I can forgive him.”

  “I think you underestimate yourself.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “Not having a father has allowed you to minister to boys like Rafael. You know what it’s like to lose a father, to grow up in a single-parent home, to have to grow up fast, take the responsibility of a family before you’re really ready. And in the end, not forgiving only hurts yourself.”

  “You sound like your father now.”

  “Usually any advice I hand out is advice I need to hear as well.”

  “So what is your advice this time, Counselor?”

  His smile brought with it that unexpected flutter in her stomach. “I have a feeling you’ve already made your decision.”

  “The next flight I can catch is in the morning.”

  His phone rang, reminding her once again why they were there.

  “Did they find her?” she asked as soon as he’d hung up.

  “Not yet, but that was the captain. He needs me to go to the station. Ben Jacobs, the man who broke into both your sister’s house and Rafael’s apartment, has apparently had a change of heart. He’s ready to talk.”

  23

  Emily watched Mason leave through the front door of the safe house. Somehow, he’d become the anchor in today’s storm. But while she couldn’t dismiss the attraction brewing between them, at the moment there was something far more serious to consider. Her niece’s life was still in danger, and her sitting here in the house while the rest of them tracked down her abductor wasn’t going to help.

  “Mason … wait.” She followed him out onto the front porch, her insides brimming with frustration. She needed to do something or she was going to go crazy.

  He turned to face her at the top of the porch stairs while she paused, suddenly unsure of what she wanted to say. She resisted the urge to reach out and smooth his unruly lock of hair back into place, wishing he could stay with her.

  She pressed her lips together and tried to shake off the distraction of his nearness. “I need to be out there doing something to find Tess, not cooped up here in this house being babysat by some government official.”

  He shot her a smile. “You sound like your sister. It must run in the family. That stubborn streak, and always needing to be in the middle of things.”

  “I’m serious, Mason. Let me come to the precinct with you. I’ll do anything.”

  His smile faded. “I need you to stay. Please. Primarily because it’s my job to make sure you’re safe. I promised your father I would look after you, and I can’t do that if you’re not somewhere safe.”

  “But—”

  He took a step forward and pressed his index finger lightly against her lips. “Second of all, Rafael knows you. He’s scared and needs someone familiar with him. You can be that for him.”

  Emily tried to ignore what his touch was doing to her, while feeling a stab of disappointment at his reasoning.

  There had to be something more. “It’s not that I don’t believe what you’re saying is true, but I’m not buying that this is all about Rafael. He doesn’t really need me here. What haven’t you told me?”

  He looked away as if he had something to hide.

  “Mason, what is it?”

  “I’ve already told you that the captain and your father are afraid that Tess’s abduction has something to do with your family. That it wasn’t just a random abduction, but that they’re targeting your family specifically.”

  “You don’t really think that’s true, do you?”

  “There’s no way to know at this point, but until we know what’s going on, it makes sense to take extra precautions. Your father made me promise that I would have you stay here, just in case.”

  “What about my mother?”

  “She’s safe. She’s at the hospital with your sister where there are two uniforms right outside the door. Your minister’s wife is there as well.”

  Emily closed her eyes for a moment, trying to sort through her feelings. She knew her father wanted what was best for her … that both he and Mason wanted what was best for her, but all this did was make it more important that she help find her niece. “So I sit here and do nothing, while you’re out trying to find Tess.”

  “Trust me. You won’t be doing nothing. I still believe there’s a chance that Rafael knows something about whoever took Tess—even if it isn’t something he’s consciously aware of. If you can, help him remember something. Anything. Sometimes even the smallest details are all we need to close a case.”

  “And if you don’t find her in time?”

  “We’re not going to go there. Not now. Not ever.” He took her hands and rubbed his thumbs across the back of them. “Listen, I know you’re scared. This entire situation has been extremely personal for you, from Rafael’s involvement this morning to everything that’s happened since then. But I really do need you to trust me on this one. Your father’s right. Stay here, see if you can help Rafael remember something, and stay safe.”

  “What about you?”

  “Are you worried about me?” He shot her a broad smile that shouldn’t make her stomach dive, but it did.

  “From what I know about you, you can take care of yourself, but … yeah. I’m worried about you.”

  He drew her against him and wrapped his arms around her. The gesture was surprising and unexpected. Just like her reaction. She melted into his embrace. He made her feel secure. Protected.

  He pulled back and caught her gaze. “I want to make sure you’re safe as well.”

  “I understand, but just because I’m not a cop doesn’t mean that I can’t do something. I really do want to be out there looking for Tess.”

  “And I truly believe that one of the keys for ending this lies with Rafael. He was set up by whoever is behind all of this. Anything you discover could help us find Tess.”

  “I still think you’re trying to placate me.”

  He let his hands rest on her shoulders, then pushed her hair back. “No … well … maybe a little. I really do want to make sure you’re okay. Since we don’t know who is behind this, I’m simply not willing to take any chances. Just promise you’ll stay here.”

  “Fine.” She shot him a half smile. “But note that I’m a conscientious objector.”

  “Your complaints are duly noted, Miss Hunt.”

  She laughed softly, wishing he didn’t make her heart race so quickly. There were a million reasons why she couldn’t fall for him. It was too much like a rebound. She was too emotional after everything that had happened today. And then there was her “no cops” rule …

  “Emily?”

  Despite her shaky resolve, she couldn’t help but smile up at him, wondering if he was feeling the same, crazy, jumbled, and unexpected feelings she was.

  She swallowed hard. “I’ll be fine as soon as we find Tess and all of this is over.”

  What would happen then? The only thing she knew at this moment was that she didn’t want him to simply walk out of her life.

  He tilted her chin up and looked into her eyes. Intense … safe … mesmerizing. He wasn’t playing fair. And the fact that he was a cop wasn’t helping either. That thought alone terrified her. Her fears were based on reality. Avery had lost her husband. They’d both lost Michael. Taking a chance on an adrenaline junkie wasn’t something she intended to sign up for. Even Charlie had made her realize that. She might not have lost him, but the demands of his job had always come before her and her needs. It hadn’t taken too long to figure that out. But Mason wasn’t Charlie.

  Mason’s face hovered above hers.

  Her chest heaved as she breathed in the combination of tangy citrus and sandalwood. “Is this how you treat
all the females in your protective custody?”

  “Only ones with bright eyes who manage to make my heart race.”

  She felt her cheeks blush. She shouldn’t be standing here, lingering with him. There was too much to do. But her heart had gone from pure terror to somehow feeling safe. Today had changed her in ways she wasn’t even sure of at this point. And Mason Taylor was the one person helping her hold it all together.

  Until she was certain he was going to kiss her.

  She tried not to panic. She wasn’t ready for this. Not today. Not when her heart was about to explode with pent-up emotions. Distraction or not, she needed to protect her heart. She’d been down this road before with Charlie, the irresistible charmer who’d swept her off her feet until she’d realized she was about to make a mistake. She wasn’t going to do that again.

  She took a step back. “I’m sorry.”

  “No, I’m sorry.” Mason cleared his throat and fished his car keys out of his jacket pocket. “You’re right. I’m taking advantage of the situation. We’re both barely hanging on to our emotions after today.”

  Which meant what? That tomorrow morning when she woke up with Tess safe and her sister home from the hospital, she was going to forget Mason Taylor and how he’d managed to break down the walls around her heart.

  Except she wasn’t sure that was true.

  “What happens when this is over and our emotions are back to normal?” She asked the question before she had time to think about the consequences. Didn’t she already know the answer? When all of this was over and things were back to normal, she’d go back to lectures on early modern Europe and American history, and he’d go back to chasing down the bad guys. They lived in two different worlds and there was no reason they ever had to cross again. “I’m sorry. I don’t know why I asked that.”

  His smile was back. “I’m not opposed to waiting and finding out.”

  She looked up at him, regretting for a moment she hadn’t given in to his kiss.

  He smiled, then took the steps two at a time as he headed toward his car in the driveway.