Visibly Broken
Page 18
I will never be a good man. I damn sure won’t be a great man, but maybe with Lo, I can finally do something halfway right.
It starts tonight. She will see the worst side of me, no holding back. If, in the end, she can still stand by my side, then she damn sure can take all of me.
I make my way downstairs where the atmosphere immediately changes from one of working out to the adrenaline-charged, backroom fight that it is. The concrete walls aren’t painted down here like upstairs, and there are no posters or mirrors for motivation.
I go to the corner that is roped off for opponents, blowing out my breath long and hard. My lungs burn as I fight to inhale and exhale in the place. The air is damp from the lack of ventilation, and the stench of too many bodies in a small place permeates my nose.
The energy is high, the noise loud, and the space is full. The concrete is cold as I toss my shoes into my bag. I face the wall with my head covered by my hoodie, bouncing on the balls of my feet to get the blood flowing. I notice they have an octagon set up with a floor-to-ceiling cage and a proper mat under us.
I feel eyes on me and turn to the staircase to see her watching me. Her blond hair is once again shining like an angel as she descends the steps to the bottom. Her green and white top flows loosely around her with her jacket draped over her arm, and her jeans hug her hips. The knee-high black boots are sexy as fuck.
I have to stop myself from getting hard at the thought of what she has on under her clothes. I can only hope the fight amps her up, because we are going to bed when we get home, and it won’t be to sleep.
Brock guides her to me, and I immediately pull her in for a sloppy kiss. I only pull away when I know I have kissed her hard enough to leave her lips plump and aching.
“This…” she says on a whisper. “This is…” She bites her bottom lip. “I don’t know what it is, but it’s hot.”
Leaning down, I nip her earlobe. “You’re hot, Lo.” I run my hand down her back to squeeze her ass through her jeans.
“Are they usually this crowded?” she asks, looking around at all the spectators.
“Each one varies.” I keep my arms tightly around her. I should be loosening up my body, but I can’t avoid touching her when she is this close to me.
The announcer yells through a bullhorn, getting everyone’s attention, “Fighting in the yellow shorts tonight, we have Alex ‘Ripper’ Long. Fighting in the green shorts tonight, we have Jason ‘Cobra’ Stanley. This should be a great matchup, as both men are great grapplers and have equal reach.”
With a chaste kiss to Lo’s lips, I pull away to toss off my hoodie before I climb into the cage. Alex meets my eyes and stares. He should know better than to taunt a cobra.
I smack the snake tattoo on the side of my neck as we dance around each other. A beep sounds, and then we lock onto each other.
I see Brock with Lo in my peripheral vision, and I can’t help smiling. My girl, my fight—what a wonderful fucking life. The beast inside me is ready to let loose.
I dive low to take out his legs, but he moves to avoid my reach. I jab out at him as he ducks in and hits me with an uppercut. The contact feels good. The pain brings me to life. Then he goes to grab for me, and I jump back.
I see the dollar bills moving around between people outside of the cage.
I jab again and make contact under his eye. It immediately reddens and swells. With a quick left, I hit him again, breaking his nose. Blood pours out onto the mat as he shakes off the pain. He then throws a right hook at me, and I take the hit to my jaw. As he moves back, though, I take the space and hit him with a roundhouse kick.
KO. He crashes to the mat as people rush in.
The crowd is full of boos and cheers equally. I don’t give a shit. There is only one person here I need approval from, and when my green eyes lock onto her heavenly blue ones, I see pride, love, and I see happiness.
I push my way out of the cage and over to my woman. Dropping my head, I kiss her and don’t hold back as my cock comes to life, tenting my shorts. When she grabs me as hard as I am grabbing her, I can feel her energy, and it feeds the beast inside me.
I break away and growl in her ear, “I need in.”
She peeks up at me with hooded eyes. “Then what are you waiting for?”
I toss a finger up at Brock and nod my head for him to handle the payout. Then I take her by the hand, grab my bag and hoodie, and walk barefoot up the stairs and out the door of the gym.
People pat my shoulders as we pass by, but I don’t stop. I don’t slow down until we get to my truck, and I have to reach in my bag for the keys. Putting her between me and the car, I touch my lips to hers, separating them with my tongue. I invade her mouth, unable to get enough.
With her back to my car, I fight with the button on her jeans before I can finally get my hand down her pants. Instantly, my fingers are dipping into her wet heat. I need my cock in there more than I need in my car.
When I remove my hand, she whimpers as I turn her around. Then, taking her hands in mine, I place them on the window of my truck on either side of her head.
“Don’t move them.”
She nods her head as I slide her jeans and panties down over the globes of her ass.
Seeing her skin out in the cold, Detroit air, knowing anyone could walk up on us, only has me needing inside her more.
I bite her ass cheek, and she rocks back for more.
With her soft shirt against my sweaty chest, I spread her cheeks apart as I pull my cock from my shorts and slide into her.
“Jason,” she says in a breathless whisper.
My name on her lips is all the encouragement I need as I slide in and out at a pace that leaves us both unable to catch our breaths.
A win in front of my woman and a win with my woman, this is everything I never thought I could have and more. Fuck yeah. I slide into her once again. Fuck yeah.
Chapter 25
Lo
He is inside me as he groans, “This one’s for the win. When we get home, it’s for you, it’s for me, and it’s for—”
“Us,” I say as I grind against him.
“Yes…” he hisses, thrusting harder into me.
I hold myself up against the cold metal, trying to open my legs that are trapped by my pants, as he rubs himself up and down my sensitive folds and thrusts in hard. I lose my breath momentarily, and then he pulls out.
As he rams inside me harshly, I feel my knees weaken. He senses it and wraps one arm around my waist, holding me steady as he plunges in and out of me.
“So hot, so wet…fuck,” he growls.
I close my eyes, feeling his other hand glide down my tummy before he finds my clit and starts rubbing circles on it. I arch back toward him, and he kisses the side of my neck as he fucks me hard for the win.
His growls, his pants, the manly scent of him, the feeling of his cock and his hand set me off, and I come, fighting pleasure, fighting my cries, fighting to hold back so he can come with me.
“Let go, angel,” he hisses.
“Come with me, Jason. Please!” I cry, unable to hold back anymore.
“Fuck yes,” he groans, and his thick, hot cock twitches as he fills me with a growl. Then he pulls out quickly and just in time, as people start exiting the building. He pulls up my jeans and opens the door. “Get in.”
We drive in silence. His body is still tense, even after his release. He thumps on the steering wheel with his thumb as his knee bounces impatiently. He is amped up from his win, and I’m fired up from seeing how quickly he took his opponent down.
Evidence of our lust on my panties is making me wet, making me want more. I can’t get enough of this man.
We are twenty minutes from home, but with traffic, it may take longer.
I close my eyes and picture Jason in his boxing shorts, sweat drenched, and the way he bounced before the fight began. In one swift move, he dropped his opponent to the mat and then looked at me. His nose flared, and then he quickly looked away a
s his opponent jumped to his feet. Alex, the other man in the cage, hit him hard, and I almost looked away, almost. Something stopped me, though.
His chest expanded, his eyes looked more focused, and he appeared even more ready for the fight than he did before.
When Alex swung again at Jason, my heart was in my chest. I wanted to help him, and Brock had to hold me in place.
Jason hit him not once, but twice. I knew Alex was injured and thought he wouldn’t recover. Then he swung at Jason, and Jason ducked right before his strong, muscular frame kicked up, connecting with the side of Alex’s head and knocking him to the ground.
I feel the intensity of his stare as the truck stops at a light. I look over to see he is searching my face. He is looking for answers. He’s worried.
“Tell me what you’re thinking,” he demands.
“It was quicker than I thought,” I answer.
His face scrunches up. “Angel, I said I’d make it up to you. Have I ever lied to you?”
It takes a minute before I realize he is talking about sex, and I bite my lip to stop myself from laughing.
“You came,” he says smugly, then looks away.
Now I laugh out loud, and he shakes his head as he hits the accelerator.
“Don’t poke the snake, angel. I will make you sorry you did.”
I laugh again. “I was talking about the fight, but if you want to make me sorry, I can pretend I was talking about what just happened between us. You know, the one for the win.”
He smirks then shakes his head. I hear a low chuckle, and then he says, “Sorry, I’m a little off.”
“If it’s any consolation, champ, I think you were pretty right on. A knockout.” I smile.
He laughs and grabs my hand, placing it on his shorts. “You do remember I can go more than one round, don’t you?”
I grip him hard, and he groans.
“I’m counting on it.”
—
“I need a fucking shower,” he declares, pushing up off the bed. “You wanna join me?”
I cross my legs without thinking, and he laughs.
“I promise to leave you alone…for a little while, anyway.” He grabs my hand and pulls me up.
My legs are shaking, almost rubber-like, and he notices.
He bends down and swoops me up. “Let’s take a bath.”
“Sounds perfect,” I say, scratching my nails up his neck, causing him to shiver.
“You better not do that again,” he grumbles.
I shriek when my ass hits the cold countertop he sets me on.
He chuckles. “Did you hear that sizzle?”
“Hear it? I felt it,” I answer, allowing myself to sink into the coolness.
He starts the water then walks back over to me, looking over my shoulder into the mirror. He lifts his chin and rolls his eyes.
“He looked worse than you.”
“Always do.” He sighs.
“Not true.”
He grabs me around the hips and spins around before setting me in the bathtub. “That night was an exception. But I would get my ass kicked again if it landed me at your feet once more,” he says, stepping in the tub and settling in.
I can’t stop the smile that spreads across my face. “You mean it?”
His eyes narrow as he looks me over. “Do you really have to ask?”
I shake my head.
A smile plays on his lips as he pulls me by my ankles toward him. “Good. Now I need to ask, was tonight awful? Is that side of me too ugly? Can you handle—”
I take his face and hold it between my hands as I pull myself onto his lap. “I have never felt happier or safer than I do when I’m with you, regardless of whether I am in this bath or in the basement of a building with a hundred people.” I lean in and whisper, “It was incredibly hot, too.”
—
The past week has been amazing with Jason. I told him that I am considering leaving the hospital, that both Dr. Bennetts make me think of the past, and I am ready to move forward. He sends me ads and links he finds for registered nurse positions elsewhere. All are weekends off, all are nine-to-five jobs, and all are in offices. All of them sound like a dream compared to what I am doing now.
I walk out of the lounge and see Ryan walking toward me. I look around and see his father watching us.
“You are really considering leaving here?” Ryan asks once he is within a foot of me.
“It’s a good career move for me,” I answer with a smile.
“It’s him, isn’t it?” He looks somber.
“No, I needed a change, and Jason is being very supportive,” I reply, walking past him.
“Lorraine.”
I stop and turn around.
“I want you to be happy.”
“Thank you.” I nod. “He makes me happy.”
—
I wake up to find Jason is not in bed. I’m not afraid, though. I know he would never leave me without telling me he was stepping out.
I get up and walk out into the living room, where I find Jason with his hands clasped behind his neck as he stares at the laptop sitting on his legs.
“Fuck,” he sputters, and my chest tightens. “There has to be something somewhere.” He rolls his neck and sighs. “Come on; let me find a connection. Let me see it. Let me see you, motherfucker.”
“Jason,” I say as I walk up and put my hands on his shoulders.
He looks up. “You should be sleeping. You have to work tomorrow.”
“So do you.” I walk around and sit beside him. “Talk to me.”
“I’m not getting any closer,” he grumbles.
“You’ve narrowed it down,” I say, trying to ease his angst. He looks down. “Jason, what if I was wrong this whole time? What if—”
“Then I’ll make damn sure there is no doubt, and then I will push to reopen their case until we find out who did it. Fuck!” He stands up and sets his laptop on the coffee table. “I hate the cops.”
I stand up, shut his laptop, and take his hand. “I want to go to bed in the arms of the man who makes me feel safe.”
He falls asleep before I do, and I watch him.
It scares me to think I may never find out who killed my family, but it scares me more to think that, if I am wrong, I am pushing him too hard. But what terrifies me most is the thought I could push him completely away.
I can’t do that.
—
I feel my phone vibrate in my pocket as I put back the medical chart. I pull it out of my pocket and sneak into the bathroom.
“Hey, there.” I smile as I answer.
“You wanna turn up the heat tonight?” Jason asks.
“Do you really have to ask?” I whisper.
“It’s fight night, angel.” His voice is gravelly.
“Oh,” I say, not knowing if he hears me.
“You sure you’re up for it?” he questions.
“Yes.” I close my eyes as soon as I realize how throaty I sound.
“You just made me hard,” he whispers.
“The next four hours are going to be hell.”
“You wet?”
“Jason,” I scold lightly.
He laughs. “I’ll take that as a yes.”
“I can’t wait.”
The rest of the night is quiet, which makes the time go by even more slowly. I am nearly out of my mind in anticipation of fight night, taking one for the win, one for him, one for me, one for us. I should feel anxious, nervous, worried, but I’m not. I know he will win. I know he will fight hard to get to me. And I will be standing in his corner, just like he is in mine.
I walk out into the cool night air and look around for the black Chevy. I spot lights in the distance and almost run toward them.
Chapter 26
Jason
“You’re off your game tonight, Cobra,” Chainz says as I take the hit to my gut.
Where the fuck is she? I keep looking around for Lo, but she’s not here. Brock is waiting outside for her,
so I have no one in my corner. My head isn’t in the fight. For once, my need to beat the shit out of something, out of someone, is gone. My only concern is for her. Where the fuck is she?
“Guess my boys didn’t need to step in last time,” Chainz goads.
I need him to shut the hell up. I need this fight to be over so I can find Lo.
My insides twist and turn, knotting up as the adrenaline pumps through my system. My nostrils flare as I fight to breathe. My lungs burn as I take his hits.
Backing up, I get the space I need to see clearly. Waiting as I duck and dodge, I find my opening. With a left uppercut, I hit the sweet spot, and down he goes.
His crew rushes the cage, and I ready myself. I will beat the fuck out of every one of them to get to her if need be. Thankfully, they are too concerned over Chainz’s unconscious state to bother with me.
I bolt out and grab my bag. Once again, I don’t bother to cover up or put on shoes. I find Brock right out front, still waiting.
“Handle the shit,” I say, taking off to my car.
He can keep the money for all I care right now. I need to get to Lo. I need to feel her, touch her, hold her, and breathe her in. I need to know she’s okay. She is everything right in my world of wrong.
I call, getting no answer repeatedly. Her voicemail driving me crazy, I drive straight to the hospital. I don’t bother to look for her car. She has to be pulling a double shift. It happens in her line of work. Not often, but it does happen.
When I don’t find her in the emergency department, I ask the receptionist, and she pages. No response.
She dials the nurses’ station. The brown eyes of the woman meet my cold, green stare, and I fight inside to hold it together when she speaks.
“Lorraine is off for the evening, sir.”
I slam my fist down on the countertop before taking off out the automatic doors, rushing back to my truck.
I drive absently, calling her over and over with no answer. My panic only rises.
I call the front desk of my complex. She hasn’t been seen coming or going since she left for work this morning.
I keep driving and calling and driving. It’s not until I stop in the driveway I realize where I have carried myself.