Fading to Light

by Sarah Cole

I want to look cute, but still be comfortable so I shimmy into a tight pair of black moto leggings, a long sleeved black and white striped tee and some cheetah print booties. I decide to do my usual smoky eye and loose waves and top the look off with the beautiful jewelry Andrew got for me.

  I’m lounging on the couch scrolling through my Instagram and responding to comments when my Mom calls to me from the other room.

  “Charlie! Can you go out and help your Dad?”

  I set my phone on the coffee table and make my way towards the door.

  “Nope, honey, they’re out back!” my Mom stops me with a goofy look on her face. “Oh and grab your jacket, its cold out!”

  I roll my eyes, and grab my black wool trench coat. As I step out onto the back porch, my eyes are first drawn to the hundreds of candles and glass lanterns creating a path into the backyard, then on the beautiful mix of rose petals scattered on the ground in the center of that path that leads straight to Andrew with an acoustic guitar strapped on.

  Every time I see him he takes my breath away and butterflies form in my chest. Everything about him sets me on fire; from that perfectly messed up dark hair, the tattoos peeking out from under his rolled up sweater sleeves and the way those jeans fit on those hips, to the bright blue eyes and white smile that are so soft and full of love when he looks at me.

  My legs carry me towards him automatically, and as I move he begins strumming the guitar to a song I know by heart. I come to stand right before him, his smile shining bright. When he sings the first words to Ed Sheeran’s, Thinking out Loud, I completely lose it with tears flowing freely down my face. Gosh, my man can play… and sing.

  Then I start to notice that the yard is starting to fill up around us. What is going on? My parents, grandparents, Kate, Alec, Andrew’s parents, Cami, Abby’s parents, Laney, Jay and the guys… I lose track because I’m so lost in Andrew. God he is amazing, and he is so solely focused on me that I feel like the song was written for us, about us. And he’s singing to me in front of everyone I love. My heart could explode.

  His eyes are shining with tears by the time the song is complete, and he hands the guitar off to Jay. Taking me by the hand, he pulls me into an embrace and I can feel that he’s shaking.

  “Why are you nervous?” my voice cracks, and it’s a replay of the scene in the car yesterday.

  “I’m not nervous baby. I told you, I’m excited.” He chuckles, reaching up to my cheek to swipe a tear with his thumb, and I do the same for him and laugh. We’re just two peas in a pod.

  “Charlie,” he starts and my heart starts thumping wildly because I feel like I know where this is going, “From the moment I first laid eyes on you my heart beat a little bit faster in my chest, and I knew you were something spectacular. Then I found you on that beach, and I swear to God, I think I loved you then; from our very first conversation. You light up every dark part in my world, put my broken pieces back together. You are beautiful, intelligent, kind, and so loving, Charlie. You are my entire world, my reason for breathing, my everything and I swear I will love you with everything I am until my very last breath and beyond.” He shifts to reach into his back pocket as he begins to lower himself down on one knee, and I’m shaking so hard I think my knees may give out.

  “Charlotte Lynn Adams, please let me love you forever. Please let me be the man, husband, and best friend you deserve. Please marry me?”

  I just nod and fall to my knees in front of him, clinging to him for dear life. This man is my home, my forever, my love and I know I will never get enough.

  “Babe… you’re killing me here. Was that a yes? Charlie, please say yes.” He pleads.

  “Yes! I love you so much, Andrew. Of course I’ll marry you. I’ll marry you a billion times.” I cry as he crushes his mouth to mine.

  “I love you too baby, so fucking much. I’m never letting go. You and me.” he says bringing our foreheads together. He has tears streaming down his face as he slides the most beautiful ring onto my finger. It’s simple yet stunning with a three carat cushion cut stone mounted on a super thin rose gold diamond band in a halo setting.

  Andrew pulls me to him and kisses me deeply once again. We only break apart when we hear cheering, having completely forgotten that our family is standing a few feet away. Our family and friends quickly surround us giving hugs, kisses and congratulations. We move the party inside where we spend the night singing Christmas carols, eating and spreading love.

  “So I guess I know where you were all day.” I say and he chuckles.

  “Oh my goodness we’re all spending Christmas together!” I squeal as Andrew pulls me into him and lifting me off the ground, laughing and spinning me in circles.

  “This one and every one after that!” he says.

  “Yep, you’re stuck with me now!” I tease.

  “And I wouldn’t have it any other way.” He says placing a soft kiss on my lips.

  I know sometimes life doesn’t go according to the plans you’ve mapped out for yourself, but the one thing I have learned is even though I have felt this crushing pain in my life, it helps me love so much harder. I am so beyond thankful for getting to live this life with the people that love me by my side. My heart has never been so full, knowing that I get to spend the rest of my life with my light, my love and my best friend, forever being my biggest fan.

  Epilogue

  Three months later…

  Charlie:

  I look at myself in the mirror, smoothing down my dress one last time smiling to myself at what’s hidden beneath the layers of silk and lace.

  “There aren’t even words for how stunning you look, Annie says as she and my Mom, work to clip my veil into my loose waves as my sister, Laney and Cami straighten out the length of my train.

  “I still can’t believe this is the dress. I don’t know how you guys managed to pull it off, but I can’t thank you enough.” I say marveling at my wedding dress.

  Shortly after our engagement, Cami showed up while Andrew was at work with the same dress I tried on when we went shopping. Evidently Cami put the dress on hold that day and then she and Annie had worked with my Mom to surprise me without even knowing. Sneaky girls.

  I look at my bridesmaids in their varying blush and gold sequined gowns. Kate’s baby bump just starting to pop out. She and Alec announced their news on Christmas morning, and our family couldn’t possibly be more thrilled at its growing numbers.

  My Dad knocks and peeks his head through the door of my parents’ master bedroom. Yes, we decided to get married on my parents’ property; a small, intimate, glam rustic wedding, but its everything we wanted and needed with all of the people we love by our sides.

  “You ladies about ready?” he asks stepping through the door before setting eyes on me.

  “Charlie girl, you look absolutely gorgeous. He’s one lucky guy, but I will say this Charlotte. Even though I’m having a hard time letting you go, I know there is no better man out there for you and I have no doubts in my mind that he will keep you safe, love you and treat you with the respect you deserve.” He says, his eyes getting glassy.

  “I love you Daddy.”

  “I love you more, munchkin. Now let’s go get your guy.” He says with a wink.

  My Mom gives me a kiss on the cheek as she hands me my bouquet of blush peonies, white roses and dusty miller. Looping my arm through my Dad’s, we make our way down the aisle to where my future awaits.

  He looks so handsome in a perfectly tailored charcoal suit, crisp white shirt and tie. Ethan, Parker and Jay are all alongside him looking dapper as well, but my sites are set on only one guy who has a huge smile on his face and is waiting just for me.

  Andrew:

  The French doors open at the back of the house as the music changes and everyone stands from their seats on the lawn, turning to see Laney, Cami and Kate begin to file out, but me? My eyes are glued to the most beautiful site I’ve ever seen.

  Charlie in an elegant long sleeved lace gown. It’s so conserv
ative, but sexy as her dark hair falls in waves around her. When our eyes meet and she smiles, and it takes my breath away, and I know without a doubt I’m the luckiest son of a bitch in the whole world. I know they say that no one is perfect, but I swear she is perfect to me.

  Richard places Charlie’s hand in mine and I don’t care that it’s technically against the rules, I pull her into me so I can wrap my arms around her and breathe her in.

  “You are absolutely breathtaking baby.” I whisper into her hair.

  “You’re not so bad yourself handsome.” She replies, leaning back to see me.

  The ceremony is beautiful as we recite our written vows to each other, merging our lives together permanently Charlie’s vows are actually a song that she wrote and composed, and she promises to play for me later. I find myself crying in happiness along with Charlie during our vows, but what can I say? I’m certainly not ashamed of the love I feel for my wife. My wife. I never thought about love or marriage much. Not until Charlie, then it’s all I could think about. Loving her has been and will continue to be the biggest privilege and honor of my life.

  I pull Charlie to an empty table in the large white tent. We are taking a break from dancing when I look down and notice a rolled up slip of paper tucked into Charlie’s bouquet amongst the flowers.

  “Baby, what’s this?” I ask, tugging on it. She smiles the sweetest smile I have ever known, when she pulls it out and hands it to me.

  “This is our future.” She says, with her beautiful green eyes sparkling.

  As I unroll the small slick piece of paper, I am slightly confused at first, but then I see the name in the corner and my eyes widen with surprise.

  “This is our baby?” I say, happiness filling me, and I’m rocked with more love than I have ever felt in my entire life for anything.

  “Surprise! I was going to wait, but I just couldn’t. You’re going to be a Daddy!” She cries. I know Charlie always wanted children, and since the crash it has weighed so heavily on her, the fact that she would have difficulty. I want to beat my chest with pride knowing I made it happen for her, for us.

  “Oh sweetheart,” I say pulling her face to mine, as tears fill my eyes yet again. “You have no idea how happy you make me.” I say sliding my hands down her trim waist to rest on her belly where our baby is growing. I can’t wait to see it grow, to feel our baby moving inside of her.

  “I love you so much, Andrew. Thank you. Thank you for giving me this gift. Thank you for loving me the way you do.” she says, peppering my face with sweet kisses.

  “Mrs. Montgomery, I will love you and this little peanut to the end of forever.” And with that I kiss my wife, and pull her and our growing baby close, never willing to let go.

  The End

  Playlist

  Don’t pray for me – Asking Alexandria

  Now you Know – Icon for Hire

  Thinking Out Loud – Ed Sheeran

  When You Can’t Sleep at Night – Of Mice & Men

  Sick Like me – In this Moment

  Failure – Breaking Benjamin

  My Understandings – Of Mice & Men

  All Time Low - A Love Like War (Feat. Vic Fuentes)

  Give me a Sign – Breaking Benjamin

  Coma – Issues

  Me Myself and Hyde – Ice Nine Kills

  No Ordinary Love – Memphis May Fire

  Feels Like Forever – Of Mice & Men

  Never Giving up – Of Mice & Men

  Coming Down – Five Finger Death Punch

  Bones Exposed – Of Mice & Men

  Breaking Benjamin – Without You

  What’s Left of me - Blessthefall

  In The End – Black Veil Brides

  Before I Forget – Slipknot

  Duality - Slipknot

  I Will Not Bow – Breaking Benjamin

  Stellar – Incubus

  Hold On- All that Remains

  Blue and Yellow – The Used

  I caught Fire – The Used

  Through Glass – Stone Sour

  Ashes of Eden – Breaking Benjamin

  Another You – Of Mice & Men

  O.G. Loko – Of Mice & Men

  The Black – Asking Alexandria

  Pain – Of Mice & Men

  Fade Away – Breaking Benjamin