by Hilary Storm
She begins to pull away and I pull her back so that our foreheads are touching again. We look at each other until we hear obnoxious noises coming from across the room. I look over and see the rest of the band enjoying their own party.
Luke is getting an ass load of attention from the girls he brought back to the room to hang with us. He is having a lot of fun, but it looks to almost be a race between Lilly and Luke to see who can get more inappropriate in front everyone. I look over at Talon and Eaven and notice that I’m not the only one seeing the show. I move to stop Lilly from getting out of control because she needs to chill the fuck out. Luke moves to Lilly before I can get there, stepping through a few girls to get to her. What ever he says pisses her off because she finds the nearest guy, grabs his waist band, and walks right out of the room with him in tow.
I move to follow her out of the room and Ivy pulls me back. “You have to let her do her thing. She doesn’t need you interfering. She is a big girl and doesn’t need a big bad cousin to twat block her.” I cringe as I think about what Ivy is saying, but I decide to back off. Lilly will always be someone we want to protect and it will take some getting used to, but I do need to let her have fun on these tours as well. I make a mental note to watch out for her without interfering in her decisions unless she gets completely out of control.
We move to our room and we aren’t even in the door before we are stripping down to our naked selves. I love to watch her being confident again. I let her control everything so that I don’t push her too far before she is ready. She drops to her knees right inside the door and I lean back against the wall while she works her magic on me. It’s not long and I have to move her to the bed to make sure I can show her pleasure before she ruins me.
I begin to travel over her body, but she rushes me to enter her. Our movements are so in sync and we look into each other’s eyes the entire time until right before we both release. I collapse onto her and pull her into my arms not letting go as I move to her side. We continue to kiss until our breathing has slowed enough to relax into each other’s arms.
I can honestly say that I have now made love for the first time in my life. I know because of the feelings that I have right now. This means something. How many times have I been in this position without any emotional connection? Every time it wasn’t with Ivy it lacked the connection we have. This brings a whole new aspect of sex that I’m prepared to explore with her as often as possible.
~Eleven~
Taron
It’s been a couple of weeks now on tour. Ivy is healing everyday and I couldn’t be happier than I am in my life right now. There is still no sign of Dylan and the cops haven’t located him.
Ivy makes everyday so eventful and our sex life is off the charts. She seems to be enjoying the lifestyle. Our show tonight is packed and I can’t help but love the spotlight when I’m out there. We don’t party every night like everyone would think. Some nights we are on the road so quickly to hit the next stop that we don’t have time to mix with the fans. We have booked some smaller venues that we are the only band going to in between the nights we have to cover for Beckoning Reality. This will help us branch out on our own. So far the venues are selling out completely when we go out on our own. I’m hoping this means we can be on our own soon..
Tonight’s show is packed and we are all pretty relaxed about our concerts now. I enjoy Ivy’s company until the last possible minute that I have to take the stage. The band right before us travels to most of the same concerts we do and it’s pretty bad ass to watch them rock out and get more attention each night just like we are.
When it’s time to make our way to the stage I leave her off the side with Eaven. I notice the girls start to move through the audience as the flash to each of their cameras flicker in the darkness. I’ve seen some of her pictures and I know she has a passion for photography and I can’t wait to see what she comes up with. She has a brilliant way of capturing us in a way that no one else has except Eaven. Those two work together to come up with all of our promotional material.
I notice her stop to talk to a guy and watch security quickly move in. She follows security back after the strange guy hands her something. I notice her stop mid step and by now I’m completely focused on her body language. She’s in shock about something and I’m glad that I know my music well enough to sing this song without thought because my mind is not in this song.
The security guard moves her back to the side stage and I finally see her face. She looks horrified. I’m near the end of the song and I can’t fucking take it anymore. I walk off stage and move through the crew until I’m standing in front of Ivy.
“What is it?” I grab her arms and snap in desperation. “What did he give you?” She hands me a small folded piece of paper. I open it and all rationality leaves my head. I wrap her in my arms and yell a demand for security to come.
“Get head of security here now. What the fuck? Why did you let him near her? Get the hell out of my sight.” I glance down at the picture of Dylan standing over my naked Ivy. He’s holding her arms behind her back and reaching for the button to his jeans. The word MINE across the bottom of the picture sends my head spinning. “Mother Fucker!” I hate this asshole.
I hear Luke and Lilly revving up the guitars to keep the crowd pleased. Talon will join in soon.
Our manager is quickly in my face. “What are you doing? Get out there, NOW.”
“Go to hell. I’m not going anywhere.”
“Do it, or this is the last show for Rebel Walking. I’ve already covered for you for two shows on this tour.”
“She needs me now.”
“I’m sure your lil honey can wait til tonight.” I fight the urge to punch him straight in the face until Ivy pulls away from me.
“Go Taron. We’ll deal with this when you’re done.”
By this time Eaven is pushing her way through. She stops when she sees my face. Her look changes instantly and she rushes to enclose Ivy in her arms. I’m struggling right now. How do I walk away from her? How do I let my band down? I pull the two of them in tight and whisper to Ivy. “I’ll be right there. Don’t move from this spot. Eaven, stay with her.” I turn to meet face to face with the head of security.
“Don’t let them out of YOUR fucking sight. NO ONE gets near them. Do you understand these rules? Someone needs to call the police.” His nod doesn’t appease me.
I hold the picture in my hand and turn to the stage. Luke and Lilly look at me and there’s no doubt I wear my emotions in my face. They know I’m pissed off.
I sing the rest of the songs for our show. I watch Ivy try real hard to compose herself, but how can she? How can she get over something like this? The instant the last song is over, I rush to Ivy. Here I find myself wanting to take away her hurt and I can’t do anything to comfort her.
There’s mass confusion after the concert and I just want to get her out of here. The police arrive and we move to a room to get privacy. They take our information and I hand over the fucking picture that will be forever burned in my head. MINE.
The security guards had retained the guy who gave her the picture. We find out that he is an idiot who agreed to deliver it for five hundred dollars and a promise of another payment after he delivered. He won’t be getting his money because he’s going in to lock up for delivering it. The scene was obviously a forced sexual situation and Ivy withers away the more she has to relive it. It’s bad enough that she has to tell the entire story again so that these officers can get the history, but now she has a visual of what the scene looked like.
We finally finish with our statements and get security to escort us to the bus. Our tour requires us to drive overnight to another show tomorrow night. I walk with her tucked in my arm until we reach the room I’ve claimed in the back of the bus. I hold her. I don’t know what else to do, but hold her. I can’t stand the fact that there is nothing I can do to help her. I silently vow to find him and remove this threat to her. I ease us over to the bed and slid
e back until I have her cradled. Her tears haven’t stopped, but I’ll be here when they do.
Ivy
What is happening? How did he know where to find me? He must know that I’m on tour with Taron. Dylan is obviously not going to give up. I can’t stay on tour and be a constant distraction to Taron. My mind can’t comprehend a different plan right now though.
I can’t get over the picture that guy handed to me. It’s not as if the picture in my head isn’t enough. Now I have a visual memory of what it looked like to someone else.
I feel myself slipping further into numbness. It’s easier to be numb than to feel like the filth I feel like right now. My tears don’t quit falling until sometime in the darkness of the night.
His arms are still squeezing me tight. I know he’s awake because of the kisses he places on my head every once in a while. He’s officially seen me at my worst. In the most horrible moment in my life and the one moment where I had zero control of what was happening. How can I get over this?
Thoughts of his manager yelling at him remind me how much he has to lose with me being here. I can’t be the reason he walks away from his future. Who can I turn to? Who else can help me? Aiden is the only person that comes to mind outside of Eaven.
I know Taron won’t let me go easily. I’m going to have to force him to let me go. This will be ugly, but I need to cut him free.
I ease out of bed and stumble to the bathroom. I pull my cell phone out and text the only person I can think of to help.
Ivy: I need you.
Aiden: What’s wrong?
Ivy: Dylan made contact. I need to leave Taron. Can you come get me?
Aiden: On my way.
Ivy: Thx
Aiden: Always
I brace myself for this day. It’s still dark, but it won’t be for long. I know what I have to do.
I open the door and come face to face with the man I love. The man I love enough to walk away from before I drag him down.
“You ok?”
“I’m better.” I walk into his arms because I want to cherish these last few hours. Tears fill my eyes thinking about how much this will hurt him. I know I’ll break my own heart in the process, but I have to do this. He has a future with no boundaries and if I stay here, he will ruin it all.
“We’ll find him. I’m going to talk to Holden to see if he can get some of his friends to help with security. I want to know that you’re safe at all times.” I let him talk and plan. I don’t have the energy to stop him. He would unleash his stubbornness on me and I can’t fight with him right now.
The stress of everything has me feeling nauseated. I try to retain it, but hell has no sympathy for me. I rush to the tiny bathroom and fall to my knees. I feel him behind me and hear the water running. He gathers my hair and places a cold rag on my neck. He kneels beside me, holding my hair, until I finish.
It’s going to kill this guy when I walk away. It’s going to kill me.
I use the extra wash cloth to wipe my face and begin to get up. “You need to rest.”
We climb back into bed and we instantly fit up against each other. His arms protect me and remind me what I’m walking away from. My tears from earlier were because Dylan. These tears are for a completely different reason, my broken heart.
I wake in the bed alone.
I must have finally dozed off from exhaustion. I have no concept of time right now, but I notice the bus is stopped. I sit up and fight off the sick feeling once again. I need to eat something. I make my way out of the room and hear Taron talking to Holden.
“I don’t want any fuck ups. I need her safe at all times. Bring in everyone it takes to make sure he can’t get to her.”
He pauses for a little bit, but starts back just as I’m about to step forward.
“Holden, I fucking love this girl. I’m going crazy wishing I could take away her pain. He’s a monster and I can’t let him near her. I’ll walk away from all of this if I don’t know she’s safe.”
Shit he just said love. It melts my heart, but solidifies my decision.
“Brother, I promise. I’ll do everything in my power to protect her. Give me some time to round up the guys, and I’ll organize the best security team you’ve ever seen.”
I pull the door closed until it latches hoping to draw attention to myself. It works because Taron is on his feet heading in my direction immediately.
“Hey,” he says as he approaches me and leans in for a kiss. I turn slightly so he hits my cheek. I’m not really loving the vomit feeling I have right now.
“Where is everyone?”
“We’re stopped at a restaurant to get some lunch. I asked Ev to get us something. Are you hungry?”
“Yea. I need some food.” I make my way to the couch and reach for a blanket to cover with. Eaven and Talon walk in just as I sit.
“Hey! I got you the special. I hope it works! Roast beef, mashed potatoes, green beans, and a salad.” This sounds perfect.
“The plan is for both of you to be safe. We are working on a team of security that will ensure that. I need you both to coordinate with me any time you do anything. This team will report to me.” Holden starts demanding orders. I let him continue as I enjoy my lunch.
I’m going to miss these people. I need to talk to Eaven today. I need her to believe my story or come up with something so she can understand why I need to leave. I watch Taron walk to the back of the bus.
“How much further?”
“One hour and we’ll be on location.” Holden’s quick response makes me smile. He’d make a perfect head of security.
I need to check my phone to see if Aiden has sent a text. I walk into the room and find Taron on the edge of the bed, holding my phone. From the look on his face, he’s seen the text.
“What are you doing with my phone?” He won’t even look at me. His hand is fisted at his side as he moves his finger to scroll through my phone.
“Taron! What the hell are you doing looking at my phone?”
“Just texting that fucking cowboy.” Shit. Here is the fight that I’m not ready for.
“What did you say to him?”
“I told him to turn his fucking horse around and head back home.”
“Taron, I can’t stay here.”
“Yes you can. I’m not letting you out of my sight. Shit Ivy, there is a rapist after you.” I know this is going to hurt. I know I’ll have to be the best liar to pull this over. I hope I can pick up the pieces of my heart once I’ve blown it to shreds.
“I can’t be with you, because I love Aiden. I refuse to fight with you any longer.”
“Bullshit Ivy. You’re fucking lying right now.” I fight back the lump in my throat and speak around my heart trying to pound out of my chest.
“Taron, I love Aiden. I wanted it to be you so I could come on tour to escape, but I can’t live without him. I miss him.”
“You’re out of your mind. I’m not letting you leave.”
“Yes you are! You can focus on your tour because I won’t be here to distract you.”
“Did you ever think that maybe I prefer the distraction? That maybe I don’t care about this fucking tour?”
“You don’t mean that.”
“Ivy, I can’t believe that you want him. I know you’re just saying that, but why? Why are you doing this?” He moves in so close to me. I know I need to move or he’ll break me down.
“Don’t touch me. I’m leaving with Aiden tonight because I love him. I wish you the best.”
“The best? Are you kidding me right now? Don’t you know that’s you? You’re the only thing I think about. You consume my every thought. I’m always thinking about your pain, your safety, your skin, your body, your lips, your eyes, your feisty fucking mouth… this list could go on forever. Don’t you know what I wish for involves you? If you aren’t involved, then I don’t want it.”
How do I walk away from this? How do I speak after that? I know I have no choice but to leave, but my heart wants to stay
so badly. What can I say to make him stop?
“I’m sorry. I don’t feel the same way. I could never love you. I don’t trust you to be faithful. I know that I’m just another piece of ass to you. I’m leaving tonight with Aiden. Get over it!” I manage to say it without a tear, but any second and I’m going to lose it.
His stare pierces right through me. The anger in his eyes almost makes me look away. I hold his glare and fight the urge to wrap my arms around him and take it all back. Take back all of the words that are breaking us.
“I love you, Ivy. I want you to be happy, and if that means you leave me for cowboy, then I’ll let you go. Just know that I’m fucking dying right now.”
“Thank you.” That’s all I can say. The lump in my throat won’t let me say anything else.
“Can I send Holden with you? I don’t want Dylan near you.”
I shake my head because if I talk, it’s over. No.
“I’m sending Holden whether you agree or not. Dylan WILL NOT get near you.” I think about his demand. I just broke his heart and he still wants to protect me. Why does this have to happen?
