“Sorry,” I say, trying to snap out of it. “I’m still in a state of shock. It’s you. It’s really you.”
I swing my legs around the side, holding out my arms and falling into him. He helps me out, his arms encasing me in a bear-like hug.
“I think I’m in shock too,” he mumbles, holding me tighter against his toned torso. “I was always prepared to do whatever it took to find you, but nothing could ever have prepared me for how I feel right now. Having you here with me.”
Tilting my head back, I look up, my eyelashes fluttering, matching the feeling deep inside my stomach.
“Fuck,” he groans, never breaking his intense stare. “I want to kiss you so fucking bad, but I also don’t want to rush this.”
I press up on my tiptoes, my nose touching his. “I want to feel again, Brax. With you.”
He opens his mouth like he’s about to say something, only to clamp it shut. I gape at him, waiting for something, for his response. Our eyes are locked and our breathing speeds up, but we are frozen. I guess it’s a combination of nerves and excitement. I reach up, clutching his hair with my hands. His head slowly moves closer to me, his lips grazing mine, stirring a feeling I’ve only ever felt with Brax. Lifting up, I ache to deepen the kiss, but he pulls back, his eyes meeting mine once more, both of our breaths shaky.
“Are you sure about this?” he asks, his voice low and husky, eyes full of concern.
“Kiss me,” I whisper, and he complies. Gently, his warm lips work against mine and a thousand memories of my life, before being nothing more than a captor, come flooding back. He holds the back of my head as he pulls me deeper into a slow and soft, comforting kiss. The tenderness of his contact comforts me in a way words never could. He’s consuming every part of me. My mind is racing with nothing but thoughts of him and how I’d only ever dreamed of this moment. My body aches for his touch, for the need for him to be the one to repair the damage.
His thumb caresses my cheek. “Izzy,” he whispers slowly, prolonging each letter as if to savor them. My heart pounds, the fluttering in my stomach makes me smile. A genuine, heartfelt smile. Something I haven’t done in a long time.
“So fucking long I’ve ached to kiss these lips,” he says, his chest heaving as he tries to steady his erratic breaths, his thumb sliding across my bottom lip.
“Brax,” an unfamiliar deep voice calls, causing me to jolt back.
“Carter,” he says, his eyes not leaving mine.
“Where are we?” I whisper, looking around at the large, unrecognizable house.
“Carter’s. He’s my boss and my closest friend,” he offers with a smile, reaching for my hand. Closing the door to the trunk, I take it and allow him to lead me to the door where I see the dark-haired guy standing.
“So, this must be Isabelle,” Carter says with a huge smile, holding his hand out to me. I look up at Brax nervously but he lets me know it’s okay, giving me a little nod.
“Hi,” I say nervously, dropping the tips of my fingers into his open palm. He grasps them, pulling them toward his mouth and kissing the back of my hand.
“So, this is the three million dollar girl,” he says with a smirk as he slowly releases my hand.
“I’m, uh, I’m sorry about that,” I stutter my reply.
“Let’s go inside.” He says with a nod, his eyes darting toward Brax, before turning his back and sauntering inside the house.
“I promise it will be just us. I have to take care of this right now. But after that, it’s just you and me, baby.” His breath against my ear causes me to tingle inside and I pull in the corner of my lip.
“Can’t wait.” I say with a smile, letting him lead me inside. I inhale a deep, unsteady breath as my eyes roam the impressive home.
“Your office. Carter, really?”
“So,” he says with a lift of his shoulders.
“So, make this quick. I need to get Izzy home; she’s had a traumatic time.”
“Oh, fuck, I’m sorry.” He laughs nervously. “Can I get you anything, a drink, some food maybe?”
“Just a glass of water, please,” I mumble nervously sitting on the seat beside Brax. Something about Carter and his demeanor makes me nervous. He sits on the desk in front of me, one hand resting on his lap, the other picks up the phone, securing it between his ear and his shoulder.
“Yeah, glass of water,” he barks down the receiver before slamming it back down, causing me to jump.
“Sorry,” he throws me a sympathetic look, stroking the top of my arm. I pull away, leaning into Brax.
“So,” he says with a lift of his brow. “What happened? Is the sick fuck dead?”
“I didn’t stay around to find out. Fuck, Carter. Why are we even dealing with a guy like Alvrez?”
“It was a risk,” he says, pushing himself off the desk and pacing back and forth.
“Well, that fucking risk didn’t pay off.”
“Well, it would have, Brax. But you let your dick think first,” he roars, the veins in his neck swell and his jaw tightens.
“I’m fucking outta here,” Brax says, jumping up and grabbing my hand, pulling me from my seat.
“You owe me, Braxton. Big fucking time,” he shouts, his finger pointing angrily towards Brax.
“I’ll speak to you when you’re being less of a fucking prick.”
Braxton storms out, dragging me behind him, knocking straight into a woman with a glass of water. The glass drops to the floor, glass shattering and water spilling everywhere. But he doesn’t stop and I’m tripping over my own feet trying to keep up with him. I look apologetically to the middle-aged woman who stands dumbfounded, hands in the air.
As soon as we are outside, he points to the truck, “Get in. Time to go home.”
“What about Mom?” I ask as I reach for the belt.
“I don’t want you going there alone.”
“What? Why would you say that?” I furrow my brows in confusion.
“Let’s call her,” he says avoiding my initial question. “She should know you are okay.” He digs in his pocket, handing me the cell phone.
“But I need to see her, Brax. She’s my mom.”
He sighs heavily allowing his head to drop a little. “Tomorrow. I promise we’ll go see her tomorrow. I just want to get you home, you need to rest, babe.”
We drive down the roads that look so familiar, the roads that have barely changed over time. My eyes are glued to looking out of the window, a huge part of my life comes flashing back to me.
“Not changed much, huh?”
I shake my head. “Nope,” I answer, looking at his beautiful, chiseled face. “It feels good to be back.” I say with a twitch of a smile. “Wait, where are you living?”
“I had my old house demolished and a new one built as soon as my mother died,” he mumbles, his jaw tight, his teeth clenched together.
“Oh, Brax, I’m sorry to hear about your Mom.”
“Don’t. You know what a bitch she was to me, how she let that fucking boyfriend of hers hurt me. Over and over.”
I see the pain written on his face and realize how stupid my apology sounds now. His mom made his life miserable. She was the main reason he never wanted to go. Why we spent so much time together. The three of us.
“I’m sorry,” I say, scrunching up my face.
“You have no reason to apologize. It’s a lot for you to take in. So many things have changed around here without you.”
“It’ll take time for me to adjust,” I say honestly. “I have to find my feet, find the real me again. I’m just so glad I have you here with me.”
“Always,” he answers with a wink and a tooth revealing smile.
I have no idea at this point what the future holds, all I know is that it will involve this man. The man that was once a boy, a boy that made me fall in love and showed me the true meaning of love in its entirety. And after all this time, he didn’t move on. He didn’t forget about me after all. And in a messed up mind like mine, it’s
almost all I need. I sit in his truck, hopeful that this can be the start of the rest of our lives, one I never thought I’d experience. And it’s the little things that I look forward to. The familiar smell of the fields as I walk in the sunshine. The heat against my skin. The leaves falling from the trees when the weather changes. Waking every day without fear of being abused or hurt mentally. Making friends, eating food I choose, hell, being able to make my own choices. I’ve been suffocated for so long that freedom is what I crave.
So much has happened in such a short space of time that I struggle to wrap my head around everything. I had totally forgotten about Tara when I told Izzy we should go home.
It’s such a mess, and someone is going to get hurt. Something I never set out to do.
“This is it,” I say pulling up on the driveway.
“Wow, Brax, it looks so different.”
“Different good or different bad?”
“Neither,” she replies with the cutest little giggle. “Just different. But I like it.”
“So, you should know before we go inside that I have someone staying with me right now.”
“Okay.”
“Her name is Tara, and she’s Carter’s cousin. Some shit went down the other weekend and let’s just say I got caught in the middle. I said she could stay with me. Carter wanted me to protect her.”
“So, you’re her protector, is that it?”
“Steady, Izzy, you sound kinda jealous.” I joke, but once the words leave my mouth, I realize how fucking lame it sounds.
“I am not,” she says, hitting me playfully with the back of her hand, and I love it.
“Let me speak to her, explain a little about what has happened, okay,” I say, dipping my head, looking her straight in the eyes.
“I wish it was just the two of us.”
“It will be, baby,” I say, jumping from the truck and racing around to help her out. “She just needed somewhere to stay for a while. I’m sure she’ll be ready to go home soon.” I know it’s not exactly the whole truth, and it will never be my intention to lie to her. But it’s early days. I’m scared I might screw things up before I get a chance with her. I can’t afford to do anything that might push her away.
“I’m sorry, I must sound like a selfish bitch, but I can’t help wanting you all to myself, after all this time.” Her smile is wide and I can’t fight the one that creeps across my face. My eyes are drawn to a scar on her collarbone, one I hadn’t noticed until just now.
“What the fuck!” I growl, reaching up to take a closer inspection.
“Don’t,” she snaps, stepping away from my touch, tears clouding her eyes. I reach for the back of her neck, pulling her back toward me.
“Why?” I ask, my voice low and deep. “Tell me,” I almost whisper. “Tell me what he did to you.”
“He cut me,” she sniffles, reaching up and pulling the material away from the wound. “He branded me, Brax, told me everyone needed to know that I belonged to him.” Her tears flow faster and harder, her chest heaves as she cries uncontrollably. I reach below her leg, scooping her up in my arms, taking her inside the house. She rests her head against my chest as she lets it all out. Each tear is a representation of the pain, yet I’m not sure how bad things were for her. My blood boils every fucking time my mind races with the lurid thoughts of what he did to her, what she was subjected to.
Bounding inside, Tara jumps up from the couch racing over to me with wide eyes.
“Brax, what’s happened?” she gasps. “Oh my god, can I get anything for you?” she asks with a genuine sound of concern.
“I got it,” I say sharply as I make my way up to the stairs. “She needs to rest. We need to talk.”
She looks at me with bleak eyes, an unsmiling stare, her index finger resting on her lip. Just the look on her face makes me feel like shit, but Izzy is my priority now. I was a fucking fool for giving into any dick twitch I felt for Tara.
I exhale slowly, putting one heavy foot in front of the other as I carry a sobbing Izzy into the bedroom. I scan the room quickly, hoping that Tara didn’t leave any of her clothes or girly shit in here. There is so much going on right now that explaining whatever happened between us would only hurt an already confused and broken Izzy.
“I’m… I’m sorry…” she chokes out, fisting my t-shirt.
“You have no need to apologize.”
Resting a bent knee on the bed, I lean forward, placing her down gently. Our gazes lock and my heart beats a little faster. Her beautiful blue eyes narrow in on me, the redness around her eyes still doesn’t distract from just how stunning this girl is.
“You should sleep,” I say, pulling the blanket over her. “You must be exhausted.”
“Hmmm,” she replies, pulling the blanket under her chin.
“I’ll go get you some water,” I murmur, leaning down and kissing her on the forehead. As I make my way downstairs, thoughts flick through my mind about what the fuck I’m going to say to Tara.
“How is she?” her voice sounds gentle but her glare is anything but. I frown in reaction to her harsh eyes on me.
“Isabelle is okay,” I say, slowly walking toward her. She’s leaning back on the counter, sipping from the mug of coffee in her hand. I rest back, standing beside her. “Listen, I guess this has come as a bit of a shock. Fuck, I’m more shocked than anyone. I never expected to find her when doing business. But you have to understand what she means to me.”
“I know,” she sighs, resting her hand on my arm. “I’ve seen the tattoo. I know what you told me about her but I can’t help wonder about what could have been between us.”
I pull in a swift intake of breath, my eyes focusing on the floor. “Fuck, I don’t know what you want me to say that will make this any better. I’m sorry, but she’s my girl. The part of me that was missing for so long. I can’t and won’t give up on that because you thought something might develop between us.”
“So, what?” She pushes herself away from the counter, standing in front of me. “I’m nothing to you?”
I roll my eyes, the drama with the girl almost has my blood boiling. “You’re Carter’s cousin. I said I’d watch over you, and I will continue to do so. I’m not an asshole.”
“Really?” she says ruefully, lifting one eyebrow.
“Come on, Tara. Give me a break. I’m still here for you. Just as… well, friends, I guess.”
“Jesus,” she exclaims. “You’re friend-zoning me?”
I shove a hand through my hair before turning and reaching for a glass in the cupboard. I step over to the sink, running the water and filling it.
“Don’t make this awkward.” I frown at her, hoping the girl can take a hint. “You are free to stay here, but in the spare room. Or the sofa. There’s always the sofa.”
“It’s fine,” she snaps, “I’ll move back home. I can tell when I’m not wanted.” She folds her arms across her chest sullenly, walking off and jogging lightly up the stairs.
I look at the glass in my hand, shaking my head with frustration. I barrel up the stairs, making my way into my bedroom and slowly closing the door behind me.
I look over to a peaceful looking Izzy, setting the drink on the nightstand beside her. I kick off my boots, walking around the bed; I lay behind her, resting my arm across her body. Izzy jolts upright, her eyes frantically searching the bedroom.
“Baby, it’s me,” I soothe, guiding her face in my direction.
“Shit,” she breathes, her chest heaving. I can’t help but look at the red scar just above her chest. The letters scratched so painfully in her skin. “Stop,” she remarks noticing my eyes on the one constant reminder of what that sick bastard did to her. “Why don’t you help me out of this dress? I hate it, I’d much rather be wearing something of yours,” she shoots me a sad smile.
“Sure.”
Turning onto her stomach she points to the zip on the back of the dress. I reach up; my hand starts to shake violently. I can’t believe I’m getting to und
ress the girl I’ve dreamed about a thousand times. Only, in my dreams she wasn’t anywhere near as beautiful as she is here, lying in my bed.
She trembles as my finger trails down her spine, my hands twitching to touch her, to make her mine and only mine, despite that motherfucking scar. I pull on the material of her dress and she lifts her waist, allowing me to remove it completely. My eyes take in the beauty of her body. She’s perfect, albeit a little on the thin side. My heart flares with annoyance at the many bruises that cover her skin. “Fuck,” I breathe, my hand grazing over the bruises hidden by the dress. “I wish I could heal you, make all the scars and memories fade.”
I clamp my eyes shut, forcing away the thoughts of hatred, hoping to calm myself, inhaling a deep breath. I can’t let the anger control me. I have to stay calm, be the guy that she so desperately needs.
She turns completely, facing me in the bed. Her chest is bare, and all she has on are her panties.
“You can,” she whispers, her hand gently touching the side of my face. “The external scars may never completely disappear, but the ones in here,” she points to the side of her head, “you can take them away. The memories, the fear, you can make them disappear.”
“I’m glad you have so much faith in me,” I say with a nervous chuckle.
“Not in you, Brax. In us.”
I crash my mouth against hers, desperate to pour every emotion into this kiss. Our fingers tangle together joining our hands as one. Her smaller, much tinier hand fits perfectly in mine.
“You were all I thought about.” She moans against my lips and I can’t calm my fucking dick. It’s hard and I know I want her, only it feels so wrong.
I need her, and I can’t deny it. I’d saved myself for this girl, never allowing myself to get attached emotionally to anyone else. And here she is. All perfect and so worth the fucking wait.
She pulls back, her eyes full of what looks like desire. She guides my hands to her breast. “Touch me, Brax. I need to feel your hands on me. I need to erase every memory of his touch. I need to know that I can be loved and made love to.”
The scars of you (The scars series Book 1) Page 17
