by D. C. Gambel
“Night,” I replied. After a moment of silence I spoke again. “Grayson?”
“Yeah?”
“I love you.”
He sighed rubbing his thumb across my hand. “I love you too, Gaby.”
CHAPTER NINE
The next morning I heard my phone jingle. I reached over quickly silencing it and saw a recent text.
Shawn: Coffee?
Me: Sorry. I can’t leave.
A few seconds passed before it jingled again.
Shawn: Obviously. I’m outside your door. You still owe me an explanation.
I looked over at Grayson who was still fast asleep. His breathing was steady and even. I felt like I could watch him all day and then realized what a stalker I sounded like. I carefully slipped from the bed and threw on some black yoga pants and a worn out I love NY shirt. I pulled my hair up in a bun as I headed to the door. Opening it, I revealed Shawn offering me my favorite coffee, a white mocha latte, then he lifted a small cooler that I was sure contained blood bags.
“I love you,” I gratefully spouted before taking a sip of my warm drink.
“I bet you say that to all the boys.” A sad smile spread across my face. “I’m sorry, Gabs. I didn’t mean anything by that.”
I shook my head. “It’s fine. Let’s talk.” I left my phone on the night stand next to Grayson with a note saying I was having coffee with Shawn. Getting him a replacement phone was on the To Do list, along with phoning the police to call off the search, and his parents. Really the list was a mile long. On there, somewhere towards the end, was to tell Grayson about my sort of relationship with Sebastian.
We headed down to the lobby taking the stairs so we would have more time to talk.
“So…” Shawn started, “He’s alive!” He said in a mad scientist way.
“You make it sound like he’s back from the dead.”
“Isn’t he? I mean how many times is he going to die and come back? Sure, once was impressive, but now…”
“That’s a question Damien had an answer to.” I explained then took a sip of my coffee. “He says angels are nearly impossible to kill and with angel blood running through my system and Grayson being a copy of my blood, Damien thinks we’re both pretty indestructible. That didn’t mean that Grayson’s captors stopped trying.” I told Shawn about the scars over Grayson’s body and how he said they were cursed items forged by witches.
“Witches? Seriously? And how the heck is he scarred? I mean part of the vampire deal is super natural healing.”
“I don’t know.”
We talked more about Grayson’s dramatic return. How when I got back we had to make the calls to the police and his parents. Then the question I had been avoiding came up.
“What about Sebastian?”
We were walking along the streets of the city, just a few blocks from Grayson’s apartment. When Shawn asked about Sebastian, I stiffened.
“I don’t know, but I know that I love Grayson.”
“You haven’t talked to him?”
“Sebastian?” We turned back towards the apartment. I didn’t want to get too far from Grayson. Shawn nodded. “I haven’t really had the opportunity.” I told him about the night before and how I tried to seduce him.
“Really Gaby? I thought the whole point of that swimsuit was to convey that you weren’t interested.”
“I wasn’t. I’m not,” I corrected. “But I didn’t think that…”
“That Grayson was coming back?”
I nodded. “But I could never go through with it Shawn. It was like part of me knew, deep, deep down, that Grayson was alive and that’s why I couldn’t let go.”
“It was probably your mating bond to him and everyone just thought you were in denial.” We continued walking. “But you did some stuff with him, right?”
“Nothing more than kissing and light petting. It always felt like cheating after.”
“But not during?”
I shook my head. I hated that now it not only felt like cheating, but to me I had cheated and Grayson might see it the same way. “During was the only time my brain wasn’t telling me what a bad idea it was.”
Shawn led me to the entrance of the building where we said our goodbyes. When I arrived back into the apartment, I saw no signs of Grayson. I rushed to the bedroom determined to confirm that it wasn’t a dream. Grayson stood in the closet staring at clothes.
“It’s strange,” he spoke without turning around.
“What is?”
“The effort we put in to picking out clothes.” He turned to me with a grim look. “I haven’t picked out clothes in… How long has it been?”
“Two months.”
He shook his head bewildered. “Wow. It seemed longer.” He turned back to his task. “So do I wear a business suit like I used to, even though I have nowhere to go? Should I just stay like this,” he gestured to his bare chest and pajama pants, “since I don’t plan on leaving today?”
I walked into the closet and grabbed a blue button up shirt then went to his drawers and grabbed an under shirt and a pair of jeans. “I think these will do. We’ll probably have visitors today so I don’t think shirtless is the way to go; unless that’s really something you want?” The man had been held captive for two months. If he wanted to greet everyone stark naked, I’d let him. He needed to feel like he had some control and as much as I didn’t want him showing off all his glory, if that’s what he needed get his power back, I’d stand by him.
“Visitors? Did Shawn come up with you?”
“No,” I explained to Grayson the story that we concocted and that now the police needed to be informed of his return. “At the time we thought we were lying, but now it seems our story had been true.”
“And my parents?”
“We’ll call them too.”
“You mind if I take another shower?”
“Of course not.”
“Thanks. It’s the little things you miss,” he smiled sadly.
I watched him head into the bathroom. After a few moments the sound of the water running hit me and I left to head back to the living room. I went to place the blood bags that Shawn brought over into the fridge, but left them in the cooler sliding the entire thing in the fridge instead. If humans were coming around, I didn’t want to risk them seeing blood bags that I wouldn’t be able to explain away. Who would dig through someone’s cooler?
I didn’t know how long Grayson would be, so I didn’t bother heating any blood, but I did get the pot ready and have a blood bag resting on the counter when a knock came at the door. I stood there wondering who it could be. I hadn’t made the calls yet and Shawn had already come and gone. I took a few steps to the door when I felt the familiar tug that told me faster than words. Sebastian.
I moved quickly, hoping to intercept him and send him on his way before Grayson emerged from his shower. I opened the door and hastily stepped outside before closing it securely behind me.
“What are you doing here?” I hated the hostility in my voice, but I didn’t want his being there to force my hand with Grayson. I wanted to tell him about the past two months when I thought the time was right. I almost flinched at the wounded look that covered Sebastian’s face when I spoke.
“You left this.” He held up a bag. I grabbed it, looked in it and saw my swim suit. I had left it hanging it the room I changed in with every intention of going back before I left The Angelo Tower the previous night, but Grayson’s return threw me for a loop.
“Thank you,” I spoke gentler. I closed the bag and stood a little straighter. “Is that all?”
He exhaled heavily. “I wanted to tell you, Gaby, but there was a chance that Damien was wrong, and if he wasn’t, then there was still a chance that they might not get him out.”
“How long?”
“What?” he didn’t seem to understand.
“How long did you know that he might be alive?” I said through clenched teeth.
He closed his eyes and dropped his shoulders. “I didn�
�t know until right before you came over last night.”
“How can I believe you? How do I know that you haven’t known the entire time that he was alive; that you just kept it from me in hopes to get in my pants?”
“First of all, when have I lied to you?” He said angrily. “Second off, I do believe that I’ve been telling you since he disappeared that I thought it was a bad idea. I even recall last night telling you that we shouldn’t.”
“Like I had to push you so hard,” I spat snidely. “You would have fucked me right there in that pool, knowing that my fiancé was in the process of being rescued.”
“I may be an angel, Gaby, but I’m no saint. I’ve never lied about wanting you. Part of me thought that I’d rather deal with you hating me then to never know,” he lowered his voice to a whisper, “what it’s like being buried inside of you.” He took a step towards and I moved back. “To feel you wrapped around me.” He closed the distance until I was pinned between him and the door. “And to know what you look like in the middle of ecstasy.”
My eyes drooped to his lips. I hated that his words caused something to stir in me, but I drew my willpower and reminded myself that the love of my life was alive and was just behind the door.
“You would have ruined any chance for Grayson and me. That’s not what you do when you care about someone, Sebastian.”
“No, you toss them aside as soon as your number one choice comes back around even though they were there for you, comforted you, and were a shoulder to cry on. Hell, even a friend with benefits when those were needed or did you forget about your drunken escapades in the alley?” I hadn’t and was sure I never would. I remembered Sebastian’s hand on my breast, his manhood against me and me calling out Grayson’s name. I couldn’t let him know that he’d gotten to me, but I didn’t know how to respond. Sebastian saved me from it. “Have you slept with him yet?”
“How the hell is that any of your business?” I spat. “I think you should go.”
“Right,” he took a step back making me aware of how close we were until he was gone. “I don’t know why I even came.”
“Why did you?”
“Maybe I was hoping that last night I was wrong and that you would choose me.” He started down the hall. I was a little taken back he didn’t dissipate.
“I am sorry if I hurt you,” I whispered looking down at my toes.
He halted. “If?”
“That I hurt you.” I looked up at him. “He’s the love of my life.”
“I know and you’re the love of mine.”
My eyes widened, but before my lips could form a rebuttal Sebastian vanished into thin air. I stood there stunned before heading back into the apartment.
I turned from the door and saw Grayson walking into the room. He was buttoning up a shirt to cover his damp, chiseled chest. I guess he opted out of the undershirt.
“Was that Sebastian, I heard?” he asked. I knew there was no point in lying to him since he could probably smell him.
“It was.”
“What’d he want?”
I strode over to him with a smile, trying to shake the conversation I just shared with Sebastian. I still had a hard time believing that Grayson was here. I placed my hands on his chest to make sure he was real.
“He wanted to return my swimsuit and to see how you were doing?” I said, not wanting to reveal Sebastian’s true reason. Grayson looked at me with his face riddled with disbelief.
“To see how I was doing? I find that kind of hard to believe.” His eyes narrowed. “In fact, I don’t believe it. Which means you’re lying to me, but why?”
I inhaled sharply. I didn’t know what to say. I could suddenly feel my heart pound in the telltale sign of lying.
“I saw the way he looked at you last night, but I thought it was just him. Same old Sebastian coveting what doesn’t belong to him. No way that the love of my life, the woman I would die for, would move on in just two months. Tell me I’m right, Gaby? Tell me that you wouldn’t move on that quickly.”
I stood there silent. How could I tell him that I hadn’t really moved on when, by all accounts it looked as if I did. If it walks like a duck…
“God damn it, Gaby!” he picked up a vase off the side table next to us and threw it across the room. I jumped as it crashed then stood motionless. I wasn’t alarmed by his anger. I full expected it, but this aggression wasn’t like him. “Two months! You couldn’t wait longer than two fucking months before you moved on and with him of all people? He’s the reason…” He didn’t finish, instead he changed his angle. “I can see just how much I really meant to you,” he spat.
“How dare you!” I spoke.
“How dare I?”
“Yes, how dare you. You have no idea what I was going through.”
“I’m sorry,” he said sarcastically, “were you tortured daily too? No? Then whatever you went through was a cake walk.”
“I watched you die!” I shouted. “I saw you take a stake to the chest. Vampires don’t survive that, Grayson. Believing that you were dead…it made me die inside. My heart felt like it had been ripped out and stomped on. I couldn’t be in our apartment. I could barely be left alone. And then one day Sebastian showed up when I was trying to run away from all the memories that were tormenting me, reminding me that you were gone. And before you say anything, he didn’t try anything. He was a friend to me when I needed one. When I was around him, the weight that bore down on me, the over powering loss I felt, would be lifted and it was so nice not to feel dead too.”
“Do you have feelings for him?”
“I don’t know,” I responded.
“Did you fuck him?”
“No,” I answered quickly and firmly.
He rubbed his hand down his face. “I don’t know if I believe you.”
“Why wouldn’t you? I can tell you every little thing that happened when you were gone and it would probably hurt you to hear it and me to say it or you can believe me when I say that I did not fuck him,” I enunciated the last few words.
“You’re being awfully careful with your words, Gaby. So my guess is that you may not have fucked him, but you did other things.”
“I never would have done anything if I had known you were still alive.”
“I was hoping you were going to argue with me and tell me I was wrong.”
“I’m sorry, but I won’t lie to you.”
“Do you want to be with him?”
“No,” I place my hands careful on the sides of his face. I didn’t want to make him angrier, but I needed him to know that it was him that I wanted.
“I know that you’d stay with me out of obligation, but I don’t want to stand in your way of being happy.” All the fight seemed to have drained from him. That one sentence showed more to me than he could ever know. Where Sebastian would have been selfish and thought about his needs and my happiness be damned, Grayson wanted my happiness above his own. “I’m not the same person I was,” he whispered.
“Neither am I.”
“I’m damaged now.”
“You’re still Grayson, and I’d choose even a sliver of you over anyone else.”
“How far did things go between you two?” He asked with pain in his eyes.
“Don’t do that,” I swallowed past the lump in my throat.
His eyes looked down. “I guess that’s my answer. If you’d only kissed him, you’d tell me.”
“Grayson,” I sighed and waited until his gray gaze returned to me. “I can tell you if you want, but all it’s going to do is hurt you.”
“You swear to me you didn’t fuck him, not that it will change things. I still want you, but,” he left out a long breathe. “I just need to know that.”
“I swear to you, I didn’t fuck him. You’re still the only one.”
He gave me a curt nod, and then placed a soft kiss on my forehead. He pushed my hands away then sidestepped around me. Before I could ask a question, Grayson disappeared through the front door. I wante
d to stop him. People didn’t know he was back, but I figured he’d need some time to himself. I just had to trust that he’d be smart.
Hours passed and Grayson didn’t return. I wanted to call, but we hadn’t gotten him a phone yet. As the evening rolled on and the night grew later, my eyes felt heavy. I walked to our room and then thought that he might need his space tonight. After changing into a t-shirt, I crawled into bed in the spare room that I had shared with Shawn. I placed my phone on the pillow next to me, just in case he might call if he found a phone. He was a resourceful man after all. It took me longer than normal, but I finally drifted off to sleep.
A bright light hit my face some time later. I winced and cracked my eyes to see what was causing the assault. The door to the room was opened and the hall light filtered in.
“Sit up,” Grayson demanded.
In my sleepy haze, I obliged slowly but without argument. Grayson ripped the covers from me then turned me to face him before grabbing me by the back of my thighs and lifting me from the bed. I wrapped my legs and arms around him instinctively. He carried me from the room and I buried my face in his neck when the hall light shined brighter. He carried me to our room, but didn’t set me down. He walked to our bed just to turn on the lamp then walked to the bathroom. He finally set me down on the counter.
His eyes blazed with anger, but confused me when his lips slammed to mine. It was the first time we’d kissed since his return. It was hard and rough, but that didn’t stop my body from responding to him. I had missed the feel of his lips on mine. He shoved his tongue in my mouth and I moaned into his as I tasted him.
Grayson pulled back to rip my shirt from my body, not over it. He fisted the fabric in both his hands and ripped it down the middle. It hung there like a jacket. His hand on the nape of my neck pulled me to his lips again. This was a different side to him. Even when he’d been rough, it had always been in a passionate way, but this raw and erotic.
He tilted my head back with his thumb until his gray gaze met mine. I could see a flicker of honey green there. He was struggling to keep his vampire nature at bay.
