Hayden_Four Sons Series

by J. D. Hollyfield

  “You know when I told you it took me seven days to fall in love with you? All the shit you gave me, because you knew right off the bat I was your angel sent to save you from yourself? Well…I lied. I fell in love with you the day you slipped your hand through mine. I felt it. The buzz between us. My heart grew that day because it needed more room for all the love I felt. You asked me if I believed in fate. I said yes, but I never truly told you why.” I wipe a tear from my cheek. “You always told me I saved you. But truthfully, you saved me first. My life before you, it was so lonely. I’d been falling into my own hole of depression. I never shared because I didn’t want to burden you when you were already dealing with so much. I struggled with finding purpose for myself. When Lucy left, she took any happiness and peace with her. She was my best friend. And when she left, I was alone.

  “I’ve never told anyone this, but I spent a few weeks in a facility. I told Lucy I was away on a work trip, but I checked myself in. I had a rough night and tried to commit suicide. I failed, thankfully, and the next day, I checked myself in to a clinic. I needed help in a bad way, but I didn’t want the solution to be death. A few days after I returned home was when I got the call about Lucy. I rushed to Florida, and then…I met you. It was as if you were my angel. You gave me purpose. You gave me something I feared I would never experience—a love so profound, there’s no actual word to describe it.”

  I have to stop to catch my breath. The tears are making it hard to see.

  “When I left you, it almost killed me again. I wanted nothing more than to help you. See you through your darkness just like you secretly did mine. I couldn’t see life without you in it, but I didn’t know if I was helping you or hurting you. So, I stayed away.” My cries turn into sobs. “I stayed away because I wanted you to be better. But neither of us was better. Being back here made me realize that. We are who we are. But our love is what will always guide us. I’m sorry I left. I should have stayed. I shouldn’t have let you push me away. And now, now you may leave me, and I won’t be able to survive that. I can’t have you leave me. Our story isn’t done yet. Please, please don’t leave me.”

  I sob, holding his hand, begging him to heal and come back to me. Tell me he forgives me. That he loves me. That we’re going to be okay. But he does none of the above. He just lays there, as if he’s sleeping, but in reality, he’s fighting for his life.

  Chapter Twelve

  Hayden

  I hear them all.

  Each one that comes into my room.

  I hear them.

  It’s a surreal feeling. I want to be able to talk back, and in my mind, I do, but they don’t respond to anything I say. I beg Katie to stay, but my pleas go unheard. Soon, her voice is distant, and then she’s gone.

  Time doesn’t exist where I’m at. I don’t know how long it’s been. I wonder when Katie will come back and talk to me. I have so much to say back. Camden’s voice brings me back to the surface. His voice sounds strange. He sounds upset, and I’m not sure why. I feel fine. I’ll be fine.

  “I’ve got plans. Just you wait. Big office. Big moves. You show off with running Four Fathers, just wait ‘til it’s my turn to show off. You’ll all be begging for a piece of the youngest Pearson.”

  I never expected anything less, little brother.

  “I know you doubt yourself. But you’ve been a great big brother.”

  I haven’t been. I should have been better for you.

  “…and I wouldn’t have our life any other way. Maybe not Dad’s head blown off,” he chuckles.

  I laugh with him. But then he’s not laughing anymore. Why is he crying? Don’t cry for me, Cam. I’m not worth it.

  * * *

  With every voice I hear, I begin to wonder if I died. Am I stuck in an afterlife? Why can I hear them, but they can’t hear me? Everyone sounds so sad.

  “You didn’t deserve this. The hardships your father put you through.”

  Trevor.

  “I know you have been so angry with me. You’ve had a hard life. But I never wanted anything but the best for you. All your brothers. I love you like you’re my own. That’s never changed.”

  Why is he getting so upset? He sounds like he’s crying. His voice fades in and out until I no longer hear him. He must be gone. Where is everyone going?

  “I’m sorry for being such a shitty brother. I knew you were doing the best you could. Just don’t fucking leave us, man. You’re the rock for us all. You can’t leave us.”

  Brock.

  Why would I leave? I own this fucking town. Brock, why would I leave? Again, his voice fades, and I’m stuck in silence. I don’t know whether it’s been seconds or days by the time the muffled sounds bring me to.

  “I always knew Eric wasn’t my father, but not a day went by I didn’t consider you my brother. We still have the same blood running through us. I’m so fucking sorry. I’m sorry for not being normal. For being so wrong in the head. I just couldn’t see you bear a mistake I made. I don’t regret what I did. And that’s what’s so fucking wrong with me. I would do it all over if given the chance. But this, I would never ask for this. If you die, I won’t last. I need you. I need you to remind me I’m going to be okay. And I will tell you that you don’t have to bear the burden of us all. We’re together. All four of us. We’re Pearsons. We don’t let one another fall. So fucking wake up. Tell me it’s going to be okay. Because if you die. It won’t be, and I don’t know what happens from there.”

  Why does Nixon sound so sad? I’m right here, brother. Don’t feel the burden of me. I’m the one who holds us all together. I’m not going anywhere. I have an empire to run. A girl to marry. A brotherhood. Why is everyone so fucking sad?

  The sounds of beeping get louder. I wish they would shut the fuck up, because I can no longer hear Nixon. I yell his name, but he doesn’t respond. The beeping becomes louder, and then it’s too many voices I hear.

  “I need a doctor!”

  “What the fuck is happening?”

  “We need a crash cart! Code blue!”

  “Hayden, NO!”

  * * *

  It feels different now.

  No more sounds or voices.

  Am I dead?

  I can see color. I wasn’t able to before. Fuck, I think I’m dead.

  No! This isn’t what I want. I need to go back.

  “You look like a lost kitten. I thought I raised you better than that.”

  I turn, a figure appearing before me. “Dad?” Oh, fuck. “Am I dead?”

  “Well, I hope fucking not. I didn’t get my head shot off and leave my legacy just to have you follow me.”

  “Then how are you here? Where am I?”

  “You’re in a place where weak people go. People who don’t fight hard enough for what they want.”

  I find that funny. “Says the man who got his head blown off for our underage neighbor.”

  “Who knew that asshole would turn out to be a motherfuckin’ psychopath. I guess no surprise there. He sure got me there. Maybe the dollhouse should have clued me in. But my seed made its mark. He’ll never get rid of me. So, in the end, I fucking won. Checkmate. Even though, it seems he didn’t make it much longer on that earth.”

  “Are you here to guide me to heaven or some shit?”

  “Fuck no, son. I’m here to tell you to stop being a pussy. I raised you to be tough. You may think the way I handled you was bullshit but look at the man you are today. A strong Pearson. Don’t prove me wrong. This isn’t your time. Go back and fight. Take what’s rightfully yours. Make me proud.”

  I feel strange.

  Can I cry where I am?

  My father looks young. Like he did when we were kids. It makes me realize how much I miss him. I want to hug him, and tell him that, but he starts to disappear. “Wait. Don’t go.”

  He doesn’t seem to hear me.

  “Dad!” I yell, but nothing comes out of my mouth.

  The damn beeping sounds again. I scream for my father to come back, b
ut the beeping is so loud.

  And suddenly, I feel like a million-pound weight is shoved into my chest.

  Chapter Thirteen

  Katie

  Four days later…

  “You ever going to go home and get a good night’s rest?”

  I lift my head to see Nixon walking in holding two coffees. “Yeah, when we’re taking him home.”

  We’re on day four.

  Hayden has been in and out. The first two days were the scariest days of all our lives.

  He flatlined twice.

  They were able to stabilize him, and we’ve been smooth sailing since. The doctor pulled him out of his induced coma yesterday, so now it’s just a waiting game. They said his body will know when it’s time and to be patient. I’ll wait forever so long as it means he will wake up.

  I take the coffee and bring it to my lips. “Thank you. The hospital coffee is shit.”

  “It’s probably what’s putting people in the hospital.”

  I turn back to Hayden. He looks better. His color is returning and he’s not so swollen. They took him off the drip this morning.

  “Any changes?” he asks, pulling a chair up to the other side of the bed.

  “No. I swear he squeezed my hand back in the middle of the night, but when I flagged down a nurse, she said it’s probably just muscle spasms.”

  Nixon nods, taking in his brother. Everyone’s been here every day. Nixon the most. Officer Forbes has checked in, hoping to get a statement, but it’s been a wasted trip.

  “Speaking of taking care of ourselves, you eat anything lately? You’re looking a bit slim these days.”

  He growls and takes a large sip of his coffee. “You sound like Rowan. I’m fucking eating. Erica feeds me those nasty cheddar puffs all day long.”

  I laugh. “I mean real food. You’re doing no one any good by running yourself down.”

  “Look who’s talking,” he says. “Why don’t you agree to leave this room and I’ll agree to eat something and we head down to the—”

  “Katie…”

  We both jump.

  My eyes whip to his.

  “Hayden?”

  Nixon is up and out of his chair, running out and yelling for a nurse.

  “Oh god, you’re awake!” Tears instantly build.

  “Katie,” he says again, grabbing at his throat.

  “Shhh, don’t talk. You’ve had a breathing tube in. They took it out, but you’re gonna be sore.” I stand and lean over him. His hand is trying to lift, but he’s struggling. “What? What is it?”

  “Mine,” he croaks.

  I choke on my own sobs. “Yes, I’m yours. Always yours.”

  * * *

  Hayden

  Two day later...

  “I’m fine. I don’t need it,” I growl at the nurse trying to drug me up. They put me fucking out and I need to be alert. Focused. I worry if I fall asleep, I won’t wake up.

  “Mr. Pearson, you were shot. The medication is only going to help you stay comfortable.”

  “Don’t fucking care. Get that shit away from me.”

  “He giving you trouble again?” She’s back, thank god. I get anxious whenever she leaves. Her smile is the only drug I need.

  “He won’t take the pain meds. I keep telling him trying to tough out a gunshot wound is not the definition of bravery.”

  Katie laughs, and I swear I feel better already. “Such a big, bad man.” That’s fucking right. Before she went to get coffee, I had her gather all my brothers. I needed to know what really happened. Nixon told me the story I had to tell the cops as soon as I was coherent enough to understand. It also meant Katie was left in the dark.

  Nixon was short when explaining no one knew the truth. But it was time. No more secrets.

  Just as Katie takes her seat next to my bed, the door opens, and everyone piles in, including Trevor. Once the door is shut, I waste no time getting to business.

  “I want to know what happened. And I want to know everything.” I don’t remember getting shot. I remember walking into the cottage and trying to talk to Nixon. They went down, and then things went dark for me.

  Everyone looks around on who should talk, when Nixon steps forward.

  “The day I stormed out of Eric’s house, I left. I took Rowan and Erica home, and I did some digging of my own. I knew Eric had cameras all over the outside for security. Not knowing if they were still running, I went back later to find out they were. Seems he had them on motion detectors. They turn on whenever there’s movement. Since we had been there, they’d been running. It allowed me to get Jameson’s license plate, which later led me to his house.”

  I remember going to his place, and the recording.

  “He seemed to be ready and waiting. But I didn’t realize he was expecting you. He was just as surprised to see me as I was when he mentioned you. I knew you were going to try to do something dumb. So, I just did it first. I brought him to the cottage, knowing it was the last place anyone would suspect. No one really knew about the place. I was going to make my problem go away. But then you showed up.”

  “What happened to Jameson,” I ask calmly. I can’t have another death on my brother’s hands.

  “I took care of him,” Trevor steps forward.

  Shock hits me. “You killed him?”

  “No. I told you, killing wasn’t the answer. But we made sure he would never be blackmailing anyone again.”

  I’m confused. “Explain, now,” I snap.

  This time, it’s Brock who speaks up. “We made sure to get rid of the video first and foremost. He had one copy hidden in the house and one on his phone. Both have been destroyed.”

  “Jesus, what did you do?”

  A smile creeps up his face. He takes a quick glance at Nixon, then Cam, who wear matching smirks. “Well, we burnt his shack down. Easy too. It was old, and they concluded it was caused by bad wiring.”

  “Jesus,” I sigh. What were they thinking? Arson is just as big of a felony. “And his phone? What did you do to be sure he won’t go to the cops or try to exploit us?”

  The three of them begin to laugh. “Let’s just say Ethan has a buddie who’s into some sick shit and was willing to help us out. For a small price, we did a little blackmailing of our own. If Jameson Vincent ever tries to return to Tampa, blackmail us, or even thinks about talking, a certain video with him, a horse, and a few dudes will surface. He was A-okay with taking the deal.”

  I can’t do anything but shake my head. Then I join them in laughing. Fucking Pearsons. Everyone starts to settle, and Nixon grabs his phone from the table.

  “Gonna let you get some rest. We’ll see you when you get released tomorrow.”

  I reach out and grab his forearm. He stops and our eyes collide.

  “We’re together. All four of us. We’re Pearsons.”

  There’s recognition in his eyes. He doesn’t hide the tear that falls. He nods, knowing we’re all going to be okay.

  “Now, you can all get the fuck out so I can see about some hospital sex.”

  Epilogue

  Hayden

  Two months later…

  “Cannon ball!” Brock yells and jumps into the pool, sending a wave of water toward Rowan and Erica. I laugh at Trevor, who looks murderous for waking up a sleeping Eva nuzzled in her carrier in the shade.

  Taking another sip of my beer, my eyes lock on the sliding glass door Lucy and Katie disappeared through. Katie left the condo in a rush this morning, saying she had a quick errand to run. She’s been acting weird all morning, and I’m worried it’s something I’ve done.

  It’s been two months since I knocked on Death’s door and told him to fuck off. The conversations I heard still sit heavy in my mind. Mainly the one with my father. To this day, I wonder if he was real or just a dream.

  The day I was released, I made a promise to myself to make a lot of changes. Life didn’t owe me anything, and after almost losing mine, I realized I had so much to live for. My brothers, Katie, t
o see through the legacy of my father’s company. I vowed to shape the fuck up. Be more responsible at work. Be less of an asshole. Basically, ditch the lifelong chip on my shoulder.

  I’ve come to terms with the responsibilities in my life. I’m more thankful for my support system. I’m not angry for the weight I hold of trying to keep our family together. I’m grateful for it. Despite how we all felt about our father and mother, they gave us each other. We’ll always have one another. Even if some of us cannot agree at times.

  The fact will always remain.

  We are Pearsons.

  I don’t deserve her, but Katie stayed. I worried she made her decision because of what happened. I won’t deny I had a few bad days where I reverted to my old self. But this time, she did what she swore she wouldn’t do the second time around and didn’t allow me to push her away.

  Being shot and near death does something to a person. The first couple weeks, a cloud of depression set in. I wanted to blame myself for everything. Be angry at how I let things get so out of hand. But Katie. God, my Katie was there by my side every step of the way. She knew how to handle me. And that she did. She shut down all my craziness. She talked to me. She held me at some low moments. And in the end, I came out stronger. We came out stronger.

  The last thing I wanted was for her to stay for the wrong reasons.

  She told me she was staying because fate doesn’t come around three times.

  I agreed.

  “Everything okay?”

  Breaking from my thoughts, I turn to my right and notice Trevor has taken up the lawn chair next to me. “Why you ask that?”

  “A lot of changes here to come. Not to mention you’ve been staring at that door for the past twenty minutes.”

  I pull my eyes away and take another swig of my beer. “Nah, it’s all good. It’s time.” And it is. I finally made a decision on the house. I’m signing it over to Nixon. He wants to have ours and the Wheeler house demolished, and something built here to replace it. I’m all for his decision. I couldn’t imagine another family living in this house with all the memories—good and bad.