Hurricane Season

by BJ Phillips

  “All right then, tell me about her and explain why you’re already in some kind of trouble. And make it good. I haven’t had a good Shawn story in ages. You haven’t been much fun for a long time now.”

  Shawn stared into the fire, turning her marshmallow stick slowly. “I know, but hey, I thought Jen was ‘The One.’ Boy, was I wrong about that.”

  “Buddy, you’ve got to learn to think with something besides your crotch. Jen went after you because of who she thought you were. Everyone saw that but you. She played up to you and you went for it…hook, line, and sinker. She never really knew the real you, and didn’t care to. Unfortunately, you catered to that. You hide from almost everyone behind that author persona you’ve cultivated.”

  “I know, I know. It’s been easy to be that person. She has fun. She can’t be hurt because she doesn’t let herself care too much. Yeah, I know I’m referring to myself in the third person. But that’s what she feels like, another person. I let Jen in somewhat, and I cared. I did. I thought she loved me, but she didn’t. The pain when it ended was awful.”

  “But you didn’t die, did you? You learned something from the experience and now you move on, right?” AJ shook her head slowly, smiling. “You’re such a big mush bag inside. Sooner or later, you’ll let the right woman see that part of you, and she’ll love you for it.”

  Shawn pulled her golden-colored marshmallows from the fire just before they started to scorch. She pulled off the crispy outside layer, stuffed it into her mouth, and then reached the stick with the mushy marshmallow goo still clinging to it back toward the fire for another round. She knew AJ was eager to hear the rest of this story, and as she watched the rest of the marshmallow start to brown, she began.

  “Her name is Carrie.”

  “Carrie…nice name. Tell me more.”

  “Yeah, Carrie,” She exhaled a wistful sigh, “With golden brown hair, pretty, deep brown eyes and a body to make you sweat. She’s fun. She’s sexy as all get out in a very wholesome way. Athletic type—rides a bike every afternoon—but has curves in all the right places. She looks like some kind of competitive rider with that bike of hers. ”

  “Really. So how did you meet this nearly perfect woman?”

  “Oddly enough, she lives right down the street. We’re neighbors.”

  “What? That’s pretty handy. How come you didn’t already know her? Did she move there after you went to California?”

  “Yes she did, and no it isn’t. Think about this…we get involved, we have a breakup in six months or a year, and there she is, still living down the street from me. That could be quite uncomfortable for both of us.” Shawn pulled the last of the marshmallow off the stick, shoved it into her mouth, and licked her fingers slowly.

  “What makes you think that will happen? How far has this gone so far?”

  “Mostly just kissing. She wants more. I want more. We’ve had a few dates, and hung out at her house or mine just talking.”

  “Oh, how awful! How can you stand it?” AJ said, grinning.

  “Oh, yeah, so hard,” Shawn said, not grinning. “She’s made it clear she’s ready for this relationship to move forward.” She paused. “And I want her in the worst way.”

  “So, what’s the issue? Are you thinking she’ll be like Jen and dump you when she finds someone else who entertains her more?”

  “Kind of. Plus, get this, Carrie is a fan. She’s read all my books. She wants her life to be like one of my romance novels, with love on the beach and all that.”

  “So?”

  “So? So?” Shawn threw up her hands, jumped up, and started pacing near the fire. “I’d have to live up to one of my fictional characters. She has this vision of what it should all be like. What if I can’t deliver that?”

  “Geez, Shawn. If anyone could give her that it’d be you. You wrote the damn things. You must’ve come up with that stuff from somewhere inside you. Women eat that stuff up. That’s why we pay you to keep writing them.”

  “It’s different in person. I found that out with Jen. Jen expected me to be that way all the time, along with hanging out with friends and going to parties and, well, I ran out of juice for a while because of that. I don’t want to do that again.”

  “Has she shown any indication that’s what she has in mind?”

  “No, but in the beginning, neither did Jen.”

  “Okay, I get that. But Carrie is not Jen. They don’t sound like they’re anything alike.”

  “No, they aren’t. Hell, Carrie can even cook! She made chocolate pie for me. Oh, my God to die for chocolate pie. I could’ve plunged face first into that pie, but of course I held back and ate a piece like a normal human. Jen never did anything remotely like that.”

  “All right, besides being a good cook, how else is she different?”

  “She doesn’t look anything like her. She rides her bike every day. Jen wouldn’t have been caught dead on a bicycle or running. She was a tennis player who was mostly into it for the cute outfits.”

  “So…Carrie doesn’t look like Jen. She doesn’t act like Jen. What’s the issue here? Just because Jen turned into a jerk, do you think every other woman in the world is going to be one, too? If so, you’re looking at a long, lonely life my friend.” AJ pulled off her marshmallows and popped them into her mouth.

  Shawn sat back down and stared at her empty beer bottle.

  “What’re you thinking?” AJ strung two more marshmallows onto her stick and held them to the fire.

  “I’m thinking I’ve been an idiot. I did something stupid.”

  “You mean something else stupid?”

  “Yes, I mean something else. I couldn’t sleep with Carrie. I was afraid of what it’d mean if we did. I mean, you don’t just jump into bed with someone like her and have it mean nothing other than a romp.”

  “Okay, so what did you do?” AJ took the empty bottle from Shawn and handed her a full one. “This is getting good!”

  “Oh, no, it’s not. It’s getting awful.”

  “I’m waiting. Spill it.” AJ wiggled her eyebrows.

  “A friend of a friend. Tracy. She’s a photographer. She’s cute and very sexy and she came on to me. She said she wanted to talk about collaborating on a book she wants to do. Anyway, she invited me over.”

  “Wait. This is after you’ve been out with Carrie?” AJ pulled her nearly burned marshmallows out of the fire and blew on them. She popped them into her mouth and tossed her stick back into the fire staring at Shawn the whole time.

  “Actually, after we had double dated.”

  “Oh, good grief.” AJ took a sip out of her beer and leaned back in her chair, but her eyes were still glued to Shawn’s face.

  “Yeah, well, she gave me her business card, wrote her cell number on it and a note that made it clear she was interested.”

  “And…”

  “And I called her a couple of days before I left. I told myself I was going there to talk business.”

  “Uh, huh…and did you?”

  “Talk business? Yes, well, sort of. For about ten minutes, maybe. Then we had a couple of drinks and dinner.”

  “So far, nothing wrong.”

  “Then we had a couple more drinks.”

  “Uh, oh…” AJ leaned forward in her chair.

  “Yeah, well, then I told her how nice the view is from her patio and she said something about the view being even prettier from upstairs. Once I got up there, I found she meant the view from her bedroom. The whole outside wall of her bedroom is one huge window.”

  “Oh…boy…” AJ shook her head slowly.

  “Oh boy is right. Well, the view from the second floor really is astounding, especially in the evening with the lights from across the river reflecting on the water and all that. We stood there in the dark enjoying the view. The next thing I know, she’s really coming on to me…you know, the whole ‘it would be so much nicer to enjoy with someone here all night’ and that kind of stuff. Her hands are roaming all over and my God it had be
en so long, and well, I sort of remember being led to the bed. The next thing I remember is waking up in her bed nearly naked with her draped over me, completely naked.”

  “Are you telling me you had a hot night with that woman and don’t remember a thing?”

  Shawn nodded slowly. “Pretty much. I felt awful the next morning. She seemed pretty happy, so I guess it wasn’t bad. She made me breakfast, but I didn’t feel much like eating anything. Between the headache and just plain feeling stupid, I really just wanted to go home.”

  “Seriously, you don’t remember anything about what you two did?”

  “No, but it’s pretty clear something did happen. We were both in her bed, naked, and she was cuddled up to me, like I said. Doesn’t that suggest that we…”

  “Yeah, I’d say that was pretty suggestive. But doesn’t prove anything. Still, if you did sleep with her when you were stuck on Carrie, that doesn’t sound good. Carrie doesn’t know, does she?”

  Shawn sighed. “I didn’t tell her, if that’s what you’re asking. I wasn’t that stupid. I called you the same morning and asked to come up.”

  “I get it. But didn’t you say anything to Carrie before you left?”

  “I saw Carrie that night, though I didn’t tell her anything about seeing Tracy. She had made a chocolate pie. Do you believe that? No way could she know that’s my favorite, but it is. Every time I’m near her I can feel something between us. Something more than just a few kisses. I feel like I might be falling in love with her. But I’m so afraid of going through the same thing again. I was really stuck on Jen, too.”

  “Let’s go through this again. Jen and Carrie do not sound like they’re anything alike. Carrie, on the other hand, sounds like someone who’d be very good for you. She obviously likes you very much. You care about her. What’s wrong? She doesn’t have a former lover who is twice your size and lives a few more houses away, does she?”

  Shawn laughed softly. “No. Nothing like that.”

  “Well, what then? Why on God’s green earth are you doing this to yourself and to her?”

  “I guess I just don’t want to be hurt again.” AJ kicked Shawn in the foot. “Ow! Yeah, I know, I should be a little more thick-skinned, but I‘m not.”

  “Maybe, just maybe, that’s one of the things that makes you a really good writer.”

  “What, that I’m some kind of romantic idiot?” Shawn stared at AJ.

  “No, that you feel things a little more than some people. That you care about hurting Carrie as well. Have you called her since you left?”

  “I did. I called her the night I got to your place. Then the next day I sent her some flowers. Nothing big, just a little ‘thinking of you’ present.”

  “Good start. Sounds to me like you need to make a new beginning with Carrie. Just start over again when you get back. That's if she’ll go for that.”

  Shawn sighed again, leaned back in the chair, and stared at the stars. “Funny, that thing with Tracy was so easy, but felt so wrong. Several times with Carrie, I wanted to make love to her so very much, but just couldn’t. I knew that with Carrie, it meant something. With Tracy, it meant nothing really…just a good time for an evening. I want it to mean something. I want to make love, not just have sex. Not that there’s anything wrong with that, either. Hell, Carrie even told me the night before I left that she wanted me. She does things to me just by being in the room. The smell of her shampoo makes me nuts.”

  AJ smiled and shook her head. “You have it bad. Just give in, buddy. Look, no one can say that anything will last forever. Wouldn’t you rather take a chance with Carrie and enjoy whatever happens, rather than running away and never knowing how happy you could be with her?”

  Shawn stared into the fire. “I’m beginning to think so. I think I needed to talk this out with you, knowing that you’d probably kick my butt. I also think that you’re the best kind of friend anyone could have.”

  “Yeah, I love you, too.”

  “But not like that!” they said together, laughing.

  “All right, here’s a plan. Tomorrow, we’ll go into the village. And while we’re there, you need to call Carrie. Even if you just talk to her for a few minutes, you need to talk to her. It’s up to you whether you tell her what you did, but if I were you, I’d tell her.”

  “Really? Are you sure?” Shawn looked stricken, her stomach suddenly turned to a hard knot.

  “Really. Think about it. There’s a chance she’ll find out anyway. Wouldn’t you rather she heard it from you than from someone else? Besides, how do you know she hasn’t already heard? Better you bring it up and tell her your version of the story than for her to bring it up and you spend a lot of time backpedaling, trying to explain.”

  “I guess so,” Shawn said. “Besides, if she is mad at me, she can’t throw anything at me through the phone. Seriously, that could be the make or break of this whole thing. What if she hates me and never wants to see me again?”

  “You’re the romance writer. Write yourself a great scene. Write yourself the grand gesture. Write yourself a better ending than that. Come on, you can do it. Fight for what you want. Carrie sounds like she’s worth fighting for.”

  “She is.” Shawn leaned forward with her elbows on her knees, her chin cradled in her hands, once more staring into the fire. “She definitely is.”

  Chapter Twenty-nine

  IT HAD BEEN A few days since Carrie had received the flowers from Shawn. There had been no further contact, and she wondered what Shawn was doing. She was wondering whether she’d hear from her again before she just turned up again at her house, when her phone rang and she saw Shawn’s name in the Caller ID.

  “Hi. Hope I’m not interrupting anything uninterruptable,” Shawn said.

  “Oh, no, just working at my desk. No one’s in the office but me today. How are you doing?” Carrie tried to sound nonchalant.

  “We’re fine. Camping out in the Smokies at an old cabin AJ has. We had to come back into civilization for more ice and some other stuff.”

  “I see. Having fun?”

  “Yeah, just chilling, mostly. We’ve done a little hiking but mostly it’s been just communing with nature and relaxing. It’s very nice here, with all the trees and quiet. Uh, I was thinking you might enjoy coming up here some time.”

  “It sounds like a great place. I used to camp with my grandparents, but that was a long time ago,” Carrie said. “You and your friend staying out of trouble?”

  “Oh yeah. Not much to get into trouble with, around here. It’s pretty far out into the boonies. There’s not even a phone signal unless you come closer to town, so that rules out e-mails and texting, too.”

  “No pretty girls up there bothering you guys?”

  “Not unless some of these pesky squirrels are girls. We haven’t even seen a bear yet, either, but believe me, I’m good with that. Speaking of pesky girls, I need to talk to you about something.”

  Carrie took a deep breath. Here it comes, whatever it is. “Okay.”

  “I did something I’m not proud of. I did something I shouldn’t have, and before I tell you what it is, I’m going to tell you I’m sorry up front.”

  Carrie almost started to laugh. Shawn really doesn’t know what happened with Tracy. Serious, Carrie, be serious. “Okay. What did you do that you think you need to apologize to me for? We didn’t do anything for you to be sorry for.” She tried to focus on restacking some papers on her desk, but it wasn’t working.

  “I know. We didn’t do anything. I did something,” Shawn took a deep breath. “I slept with Tracy. Now, before you get angry and hang up, I want you to know I was drunk, and I don’t remember anything about it. That’s no excuse, but I wanted to tell you before you heard it from Tracy or Kelly. I’m so sorry.”

  Carrie had to put her hand over her mouth to keep from giggling into the phone. Poor Shawn, she really is feeling awful about this. As well she should. Maybe she should suffer just a bit longer.

  “Look, you and I don’t
have an exclusive relationship. How do you know I didn’t sleep with someone else after we started seeing each other?”

  “Did you?” Shawn’s voice was just above a whisper.

  Carrie made her wait as she paused for effect. “No, I didn’t. I could’ve, though, since I don’t have a claim on you or you on me other than good friends, right?” She could feel Shawn squirm on the other end.

  “Uh, no, I guess not. I guess I sort of thought…”

  “What did you sort of think?” Carrie asked softly.

  “Well, I guess from things you said…”

  Time to give it up, Carrie thought. “Shawn, I haven’t been with anyone since we met. Except you. You’re still the one I want.”

  “You do? Even after what I told you? Are you sure?”

  “Yes, I do. I can’t wait forever for you to figure out when you’ll be ready to move on to something more with me. I’m hoping you’ll get your issues, whatever they are, worked out up there in the woods. Maybe the higher altitude will help.”

  “My head is feeling clearer already. Then you forgive me for what I did?”

  “If that’s what you need from me, yes. I forgive you for what you did. By the way, I had Kelly over a couple of days ago.”

  “Kelly? Really?”

  “Yes, really. I made lunch for her. We had a great time. Tracy has a new girlfriend, some sculptor from Fort Myers Beach named Chris. Nice, but not my type.”

  “You met Tracy’s new girlfriend?”

  “Oh yeah, didn’t I tell you? I was at Kelly’s for a cookout. Let’s see, there was me, Kelly, Tracy and Chris. It was fun. Tracy made a point of chatting me up about you when we were alone for a few minutes. I hope you don’t mind that I told them you’re out of town.”

  “No, that was okay. I didn’t tell them. They probably wondered where I am, right?”

  “Pretty much, yeah.”

  “Anything else happen?” Carrie could almost hear Shawn holding her breath.

  Carrie was ready to drop the bomb. “Tracy told me you spent the night with her.”

  There was silence from the other end for a few seconds, before Shawn said softly, “Well, I guess you’ve got the story from both ends now. I’m glad you aren’t mad at me.”