Why had Jamal brought her here? She desperately wanted to hope, to believe that this meant he cared about her. Had Fatima been right about his relationship with Yasmin? Is that what he was going to tell her tonight? Her stomach lurched a couple of times, and she prayed that she wouldn’t throw up again anytime soon. That was not how she planned on telling Jamal that she was having his baby.
Taking a breath for courage, she stepped into the tent…and found herself transported back in time. The low furniture, the pillows, the scent of incense all conspired to make her believe that past and present had somehow merged together.
She looked around the tapestry-lined tent, then settled her gaze on her husband. Jamal sat cross-legged, dressed in traditional robes and headdress. Even though she recognized him, he appeared to be a formidable stranger. A shiver of fear rippled through her. To distract herself she studied the table. It was covered with piles of papers, several boxes and a set of keys. What on earth?
“Please come sit with me, my wife,” he said formally.
As she did so, settling on a cushion across the low table from him, he lit two sticks of incense and placed each one in a tiny stand at opposite ends of the table. Then he stared at her intently.
“Tonight and for always you are my one true wife,” he intoned. “Tonight, before God and the desert and all my worldly possessions, you are my one true wife. The possessor of my heart and the mother of my children yet unborn. Tomorrow and each tomorrow hereafter, through my death and into the life beyond, you are my one true wife.”
Heidi’s breath froze in her throat. The words lingered in the stillness of the tent, bringing tears to her eyes. She recognized those ancient words, first spoken long before the birth of Christ, when El Bahar was a land of nomads and men ruled by virtue of strength rather than wisdom. They had existed long before the written word and were spoken on the monumental occasion of a man disbanding his harem and relinquishing his right to have more than one wife.
With those words a husband pledged to have one true wife, regardless of who had gone before. They promised fidelity, even through death. After making such a promise, no El Baharian man could ever marry again—even if his wife died the very next day. Even more important, those precious words promised love.
She stared at the scattering of objects on the table. She recognized the keys to his many cars, the deeds to land and horses, bank statements. They represented all his worldly possessions. The boxes would contain family jewels given to him.
Let it be true, she prayed silently. She wanted Jamal to mean all of this.
“Why are you performing the ceremony?” she asked, still afraid to hope yet unable to stop the lightness that filled her.
“Because you are my one true wife, and I didn’t know how else to make you understand that.” Jamal’s gaze was intense, his voice sincere.
The tears she’d been fighting spilled over onto her cheeks. Jamal rose and came around to her side of the table and crouched next to her.
“I will never understand women,” he said, pulling her into his arms and holding her close. “I thought this would make you happy.”
“It does,” she murmured, clinging to him. “So very happy.”
“Then why are you crying?” He brushed her lips with his. “Never mind. I doubt I would understand.”
He sat on a cushion next to her and cupped her face. “You and I have several things we need to talk about. I want you to know that I mean this.” He motioned to the table in front of them. “Everything I said was true. You are my one true wife, Heidi. I love you.”
She threw herself at him, needing to feel his warmth surrounding her. Love. He’d said the word. It wasn’t just affection or caring, but love. True love. He’d spoken the words pledging himself to her through time. Not just in this life, but in any that would follow.
He lowered her onto the cushions and stretched out beside her. Then he drew her into his arms until they were touching from shoulder to thigh. He slipped one knee between hers and smiled at her.
“By your reaction I assume you think this is good news?”
She laughed through her still-flowing tears. “Of course.” She lowered her chin slightly. “I love you, too, Jamal.”
She risked a glance at him and saw fire flare in his eyes.
“Do you? Are you sure?”
She nodded shyly. “I have for a long time. I was afraid because I didn’t think you would ever love anyone but Yasmin. That’s why I became Honey. So that I would have a better chance at winning you. I think I was in love with you even then, although I didn’t recognize it yet.”
“My sweet, innocent bride. How foolish we’ve both been,” he said as he brushed the hair from her face and rubbed his thumb against her mouth. “I want to make something very clear. I do not love Yasmin. I’ll admit that there was a time, when we were first married, that I fell in love with her, but it didn’t last long. She wasn’t a very lovable person.”
She couldn’t believe this was happening—that she was in Jamal’s arms, and he was telling her he loved her. It was as if every dream she’d ever had just came true.
“I want to tell you about Yasmin,” Jamal said. “Actually I don’t want to but I think I should.”
Heidi was suddenly afraid. She had a bad feeling she wasn’t going to like what he had to say, but she forced herself to nod slowly. “All right.”
Jamal kissed her forehead, then rolled onto his back. He stared up at the ceiling of the tent. Lanterns hanging in the four corners cast light across the square open area, but they did little to allow her to see what Jamal was thinking.
“Yasmin was very beautiful,” her husband said slowly. “When the marriage was arranged and we met, she seemed excited and happy to be marrying me. She was attentive, affectionate, everything a young man could want from his bride-to-be.”
Heidi curled her fingers toward her palms. She didn’t want to hear this, but she knew it would be better for both of them in the end. Besides, if Jamal truly loved her now, then nothing about his past could hurt her.
He turned to look at her and smiled ruefully. “Unlike you, who announced at our first meeting that you were not interested in marrying me.”
Heidi felt herself flush. “I didn’t mean it in a bad way.”
“I know. And I’m not complaining. You’ve been honest about your feelings from the beginning. I never doubted where I stood. But Yasmin was different. Everything she said was a lie. She didn’t want to be married, although that is what she pretended. She had no interest in me. She wanted the title, the money and the position. After we had been married a few weeks, she revealed her true nature to me. Part of that was to make it clear she was not interested in having me in her bed.”
He stopped talking and looked away. Heidi sensed that this was difficult for him, and she touched his arm. “I understand.”
“No, you don’t,” he told her without looking at her. “You can’t. You’re too innocent, too good a person. She didn’t take lovers. In her way, she was faithful. But only because the thought of being intimate with anyone was repugnant. She wasn’t interested in having children, and she made it clear that she would prefer I never touched her again.”
His mouth twisted in a grimace. “The irony is that over those first few weeks, when she’d been living her lie, I’d made the mistake of falling in love with her. Once I realized the truth, I grew to hate her. By the time she died, I no longer cared about her at all.”
Heidi struggled to absorb all that she’d heard. She sensed that there was much more to the story than he was telling her and that eventually Jamal would confide in her more. But for now she knew enough to understand that her rejection of him on their wedding night must have sent him back to his time with Yasmin.
“No wonder you weren’t happy about me wanting a mental and spiritual marriage,” she said slowly.
He looked at her and smiled. “I wasn’t thrilled,” he agreed. “But you’ve since proven that your animal nature is as well
developed as your intellect. It is one of your most charming features.”
She moved close so that she could cuddle against him again. He was right about her innocence. She couldn’t begin to know what that time had been like for him, nor did she have any idea about what it cost him to confess it all now. But she did know that telling her was an act of faith on his part.
“I love you,” she said, resting her head on his shoulder and sliding her leg over his. “I love you, and I want you. Always.”
Jamal wrapped his arms around her and pulled her on top of him. He cupped her face. “Stay,” he murmured. “Stay with me. Let me love you and love me in return. For always. Have my children. Share my life as I want to share yours. We can be wonderful together.”
Somewhere in the middle of his telling her about his past her tears had stopped. She felt the burning again and tried to blink them back.
“I’ll stay forever,” she promised. “I was so convinced you were still in love with Yasmin. Somehow when we talked about her the first time, everything got mixed up. I thought you were saying you were still mourning her and you thought…”
“I thought you were tolerating me to get what you wanted. The way she had.” He tucked her hair behind her ears and smiled at her. “That’s why I was so charmed by you being Honey. At that point you’d already married me, so you had the money and the title and the position. The only thing left to win was my heart. You made me very happy by wanting that as well. That was the reason I played along. Not because I wanted to make a fool of you. I never thought you were anything but wonderful, Heidi. You are my life. I would move the world for you if I could.”
Her heart was so full of love and happiness, she thought she might burst. “I actually like the world where it is, but thank you for asking.”
“You’re welcome.” His gaze sharpened. “I thought we might end our discussion by making love. We never did have a wedding night in a tent. What do you think? I took a chance and chilled a bottle of champagne for us.”
She shifted, moving a little lower until she felt the hardness of his arousal pressing against her. He wanted her. Jamal Khan, Prince of El Bahar, both loved and wanted her. She had never thought her life could be so incredibly wonderful.
“Yes,” she whispered as she pressed kisses against his mouth. “I want to make love with you now and as often as possible. I want to feel your body pressed against mine, and I want to feel you inside me. One of these days, if you’re very lucky, I might even perform that silly dance again.”
He smiled a satisfied, male smile. “I’d like that. Hold on while I get the champagne.”
He started to move, but she stopped him with a shake of her head. “I can’t have any.”
“Why? Are you ill?”
She grinned. “Not exactly. I feel fine most of the time. However, I’m going to put on a lot of weight and get thick ankles and maybe even be crabby. You think you’ll still love me then?”
She was trembling by the time she finished her speech. It probably wasn’t the best way to tell Jamal she was pregnant, but she wanted him to know, and she hoped he would be happy and—
He rolled her onto her back, then jumped to his feet and pulled her up with him. He clasped her around the waist and swung her up in his arms, spinning them both until the tent was a blur.
“You’re pregnant!” he announced. “You’re going to have our baby.”
“There’s nothing wrong with your brain,” she said, laughing. “I’m smart, you’re smart. This bodes well for the gene pool.”
“Heidi. Thank you.” He let her slide down until her feet touched the carpeted floor, then he pulled her close and kissed her. “A baby. That’s wonderful. You’ll be an amazing mother.”
“And you’ll be the perfect father. I think we’re going to be very happy together,” she told him.
Jamal stared into her eyes and smiled. “We already are, my love. We already are.”
The Sheik's Arranged Marriage Page 21
