Race to Recovery (Full Throttle)

by Faust, Megan

  “I’m sorry Brant but I really don’t want to get to know you. I don’t want friends. I don’t like talking to people.”

  “Alice, wait, please.”

  She hesitated.

  “I’d really like to get to know you, at least a little. I don’t read, too much TV gives me a headache, and my brother abandoned me for the day.”

  “I wouldn’t know what to say.”

  “What do you like to read?”

  She looked around, feeling trapped, then her shoulders slumped and she sighed. “Romance, I like romance.”

  “Why?”

  “Why do you ask so many questions?”

  “They’re safe questions, right? I’m trying not to pry into your private life. I don’t want to scare you.”

  “I like happy endings,” she said. And then she turned on her heal and bolted from the room.

  Brant grinned. That’s more words at one time than every other encounter combined and every word she speaks leaves me longing for more of her voice. Even when she’s telling me she doesn’t want to talk to me she sounds beautiful. The word beautiful made him pause and a question popped into his head, unbidden.

  Do you think she’s beautiful?

  It only took a heartbeat for him to answer. Yes, she’s beautiful, maybe the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen. She’s not as curvy or elegant or confident as the other women I’ve dated but somehow something about that catches my eye and I can’t look away. I don’t want to look away. I wish she wouldn’t run away.

  Movement on the edge of his vision made Brant look out the window. Penny and one of the male patients were coming in from the garden. She was smiling like a cat that had caught a canary and he had a smug look on his face. She paused and casually dusted dirt from her pant leg, drawing Brant’s attention there. The knees of her pants were scuffed and a stubborn cedar chip clung to one leg. When she straightened she caught sight of him and her smile widened.

  He was trapped and he knew it. The only way out of the library crossed paths with the only way in from the garden. I wouldn’t even make it as far as the men’s washroom, he thought, desperately looking around. The book! He glanced down at the cop novel in his hand. If I look occupied there’s a chance he’ll leave me alone! He dashed back to his chair, opened the book to chapter one, and started reading.

  When Penny came in she breezed over and said, “Well, if it isn’t the dark and brooding Brant. Are you feeling any chattier today?”

  “I’m sorry, I’m busy at the moment,” he said.

  “You weren’t interested in dietary matters but maybe you’d be interested in this. Did you know that the wall around the garden is under surveillance? They don’t want anyone sneaking in or out and they don’t want anyone tossing in ‘care’ packages to the patients. The door has a camera too. But there are blind patches out there, places where the orderlies don’t always look when they do their rounds and where the cameras can’t see.”

  “Penny, I’m trying to read. Why would I care about cameras?” When he looked up he noted with disgust that her lipstick was smudged.

  “A little relief is all I’m offering. It’ll help take the edge off the cravings.”

  He stood, which put him toe-to-toe with her. “I’m not interested, Penny.”

  She put a hand on his chest and whispered, “Do you have a sweetheart back home? Because you can call me any name out want.”

  He shoved past her and stormed out of the library.

  She watched him leave feeling hot with rage. I’ve tried being nice, I’ve tried being sweet, so why won’t you love me? Not one of the men here has resisted, they all accept a little love from me. You’re no different, Brant, you’re no better than they are. I’ve seen you eyeing the Mouse. When she turns you down you’ll be looking for love elsewhere, and I’ll be waiting.

  * * * *

  Dr. Keaton smiled apologetically to the patient seated opposite him as the pounding on his office door continued. “Hold on, I’ll have to see who that is.”

  Brant was about to know again when the door swung inwards. “Good, you’re here. I need to talk to you.”

  “That’s not how it works, Brant. I have another patient with me right now. You can come back in twenty minutes or so ….”

  “This can’t wait,” Brant said through gritted teeth.

  “All right, let me see if Dr. Hurd is available. Please wait out here.”

  Brant stood tapping his heel, his arms crossed over his chest, until the door opened again.

  “Dr. Hurd is expecting you. He’s at the end of the hall on your right.”

  “Fine.” Brant stormed off. He was about to pound on Dr. Hurd’s door when it swung open and Dr. Hurd ushered him in. “Have a seat, Brant, and we’ll talk about what’s bothering you.”

  “I don’t want to sit and have a polite chat about my feelings! I was just offered a blow job by one of the most abrasive people I’ve ever met.”

  “You know,” Dr. Hurd said as he perched on the arm rest of one of the comfortable looking chairs. “Most men are politely flattered by such a proposition, even if they fully intend to decline.”

  “Sure, if some woman in a bar or coffee shop were to offer me a blow job over the course of polite conversation I’d be flattered but she was coming in from the garden with the last guy she’d serviced, her knees were still dirty and her make-up hadn’t been touched up, nothing! If there had been no cameras in the library she’d have been on her knees trying to get my jeans undone. She was that persistent!”

  “And exactly who was this?”

  “Penny! My first morning here she gave me some line, ‘I’m Penny but I’m not cheap’,” he mimicked. “She wasn’t joking, apparently she’s free!”

  “Brant, I understand you’re upset but …”

  “Damn right I’m upset! You told me there was a strict ‘no harassment’ policy here. Well, I’m being harassed! I’ve made it very clear I’m not interested in talking to her and I definitely don’t want any sexual favours from her.”

  “Just like Alice made it clear she didn’t want to talk to you?”

  “That’s different,” he grumbled.

  “I don’t see how.”

  “I’m being polite! I haven’t said anything rude or offensive. I’m just making small talk when I see her.”

  “I see. Well, I’ll put your complaint on record and we’ll ask around, see if anyone else is having a problem with her.”

  “Problem? They’re all getting blow jobs from her so of course they don’t have a problem.”

  “Brant, you don’t know that it’s more than one patient involved in this.”

  “How come you aren’t kicking her out? She’s broken two of your policies.”

  “If she does it again to you she will be removed. If other patients report harassment she will be removed.”

  “If I had walked up to her and said, ‘hey Sweets, give me a blow job,’ I’d be out on my ass and you know it.”

  “Since we have more experience with that situation than I would care to admit, you’re probably right. And you’re right, it is a double standard. We men usually have a desire to protect women while believing both that men do not need protecting, and that women are incapable or unwilling to do us harm.”

  “Damn you head doctors like to talk. Can you just shut up with the shrink nonsense and do something about her?”

  “I’ll do a little poking around and I’ll speak to Penny.”

  “That’s it? Fat lot of good it does telling you anything.” He stormed out, slamming the door hard enough to rattle the glass window.

  * * * *

  Alice sat staring out the window in her bedroom. I’m bored, but I don’t want to go down and get a book if Brant is still camped out in the library. I’ve updated my journal and reread all the entries since I got here and there’s nothing to look at outside.

  The rooms were decently sound proof but Alice could still hear someone stomping down the hallway and the slamming of a do
or nearby. Cautious she came out of her room to find the hallway deserted. “It could have been anyone,” she whispered. There are so many men here and all of them bigger than me, I just can’t handle being around them, especially when they’re angry. It made her shake just to think about it. She had cut more than one meal short when one of them started yelling in the dining room.

  “I need a book.” She stepped out and turned to lock the door. When she turned around again Penny was at the top of the stairs.

  Penny smiled radiantly and purred, “Oh, hello Alice. I was just looking for Brant, have you seen him?”

  “No, I haven’t,” Alice mumbled, her eyes on the floor. “Excuse me, I have somewhere to be.”

  “Is Dr. Keaton expecting another payment?” Penny asked too sweetly.

  Alice struggled to hold back the tears. She rushed past Penny and down the stairs where she collided with Dr. Hurd. He caught her before she could fall.

  “Alice, are you okay?”

  She shook her head, ‘no’.

  “Has Brant been harassing you again?”

  “No. Brant has been very polite,” she said with uncharacteristic force. “But Penny keeps suggesting that I’m a whore, when she’s not sneering at me or belittling me.”

  “How long has this been going on?”

  She seemed to shrink as the anger began to leave her. “Since I arrived, I guess. I don’t like causing trouble or calling attention to myself so I didn’t make a big deal out of it. If you tell on them it only makes it worse. I’m sorry, I was just angry.” She forced herself to look up, meet his eyes, and smile.

  “It was no trouble at all, Alice. In fact it was exactly what I needed to hear since Brant also lodged a very serious complaint against Penny today.” He sighed. “Alice, there may be a bit of a scene in a short while and I know raised voices make you nervous …”

  “Thank you,” she said. She slipped away from him, making herself smaller as she crossed the room.

  Dr. Hurd found Penny in the hallway rapping her knuckles against door 16, Brant Bye’s room. He could hear her saying, “Brant, are you in there? Brant, answer me, please. I’m sorry I upset you, can’t we talk?”

  “I don’t think anybody is home.”

  Penny froze with her hand in mid-air. “Oh, Dr. Hurd, hello. I guess you’re right. I’ll have to talk to him later.” She tried to walk past him but he stopped her with a gentle hand on her arm.

  “Penny, Brant has made it very clear that he’s not interested in talking to you, or in any other attention or service you may have offered.”

  “Services? You make it sound like I offered to wash his socks.” She tried to laugh it off.

  “That’s not the offer he told me about. You know the rules, no harassing other patients and no sexual involvement.”

  “I did not have sex with Brant.”

  She sounded like a pouting child and the half pouty-half seductive pose did not go unnoticed by Dr. Hurd. He sighed. “We consider both sexual intercourse and oral sex to be sexual involvement, Penny.”

  “I’ve never given Brant a blow job.” She had gone from pouty to desperate. “The rest was just a misunderstanding. I’ll leave him alone now, I promise, not another word. He didn’t have to go and tell on me just because of a misunderstanding.”

  “I’m sorry Penny but this has gone past apologies and misunderstandings.”

  “But Brant doesn’t like me! He doesn’t like anyone, not even his brother. They had a huge fight this morning at breakfast. He’s angry and he’s blowing this all out of proportion. You aren’t really going to kick me out because of a misunderstanding between me and one patient who has an obvious grudge, are you?” She smiled sweetly but Dr. Hurd was unmoved. “Please, Dr. Keaton says I have at least two more weeks before he can clear me for release. I can’t sleep without shaking. I throw up every day. You can’t kick me out, I’m not better yet. It’s not fair.”

  “Penny, Brant’s not the only one to lodge a complaint against you. I wish we could let you stay until you had completed your recovery but you’re impeding the healing process for other patients and we cannot allow that. Please pack up your belongings. Mr. Everett will come up to help you with your bags. And Penny, he has the master key.”

  “Then I’ll bar the damn door!” she shrieked. “I’m not leaving!” She raced into her room and slammed the door.

  It only got noisier after that. Brant hear Penny shrieking and swearing from his room down the hall. There were several thuds and Brant couldn’t decide if Penny was throwing things or kicking the walls as they tried to carry her out. There were masculine voices as well, softer, coaxing. The shrieking got louder as they brought her into the hallway and Brant could hear the words now.

  “I’m going to kill that little son of a bitch. Where the hell is he? You can’t throw me out! I’m not healed, I’m not better yet. I’ll use again! Where is that bastard? He ruined my life! I’ll kill him; I swear to god, he’s dead. Brant is so dead!”

  Dr. Hurd and Dr. Keaton stood in the hallway at the foot of the stairs, out of the way and mostly out of sight but near enough to be of assistance should the need arise. Dr. Keaton sighed and shook his head as the orderlies carried Penny down the stairs, still screaming.

  “I should have seen this, Clyde, I’m sorry. Penny was dependent on more than just the drugs, she craved affection. I guess she started seducing other patients as a way to fill that need. She seemed to be more stable, I thought she was getting better, but she was just using in a different way.”

  “We can’t always see everything, Sebastian. These people have a lot of experience hiding their symptoms, and their addictions, from the people closest to them.”

  “Still, it was my job. I could have prevented this.”

  “I don’t think you could have. She would have kept this up until someone like Brant decided not to stand for it. Come on, there’s a lot a paperwork to do now.”

  From the library Alice could hear the yelling as they brought Penny down the stairs. She stood with her back against the wall just inside the door where no one could see her. She squeezed her eyes shut and focused on her breathing but still Penny’s voice seemed to change into a deeper voice, one that yelled insults at her from across deep in her own mind. It was all over quickly but Alice was shaking and tears streamed down her face. She peeked around the door frame then made a break for her room before the gawkers came out to gossip about the drama.

  * * * *

  Alice ate lunch slowly, looking up hopefully every time someone walked in to the dining room. Every time it wasn’t Brant she sighed and took another bite of food. Brant never did show at lunch, or at dinner. After dinner Alice paused at number sixteen and stared at the door for a long time.

  Speaking to him in the dining room or library was one thing, but actually seeking him out was a different matter altogether. Her throat was dry and she swallowed hard, squeezing her eyes shut.

  He fought with Penny so there’s no telling what mood he might be in. He yelled at his own brother this morning. He wouldn’t think twice about yelling at me just for knocking on the door. Shaking, she retreated to her own room and her romance novels.

  Chapter Four

  Seth pulled into the lot at eight am on the nose. He turned off the car and sat staring at the traffic beyond the thick bushes. He couldn’t hear the hum of the other cars, except when a large truck rumbled past, and if he closed his eyes it was almost like being back on the farm.

  Except that here I’m the only target for Brant’s bitching and I don’t have the privacy of my garage to putter in.

  He sighed and headed for the visitor’s door. He had read the stack of papers from Dr. Keaton over and over again and he knew he had to let go of any fights he’d had with Brant. Dwelling on disagreements could make a patient resentful and resistant to help. There was a time and place to air dirty laundry but that time wasn’t during the recovery process.

  Besides, if I’m not there to help keep his temper in chec
k he’ll get himself kicked out. The orderly on duty searched his pockets and let him through the secure door into the Common Room.

  Everything looked the same but Seth could feel more tension in the air, could see it in the body language of the men who were coming down for breakfast. Worried now, he hurried to the dining room. Brant wasn’t there but for a moment his gaze met the quiet blonde’s. She was staring at him and it looked like she was debating something with herself. They hesitated in that moment and then her cheeks flushed making her hair look even lighter and she looked back down at her breakfast.

  Seth turned away and went upstairs. He knocked on his brother’s door. There was no answer and Seth frowned. “Brant? Open up, it’s me.”

  The lock clicked and the door opened. “Where did you go yesterday?” Brant growled, filling the doorway.

  So much for letting things slide, he thought. “Are we going to do this in the hallway?”

  Brant stepped back, still looking surly, and closed the door behind his brother. “Are you planning on abandoning me here every day?”

  “Are you planning on locking me out of your room every day? One of the orderlies asked me to either join you or leave and since you wouldn’t let me in I had no choice.”

  “You don’t know what I went through yesterday. And all because you weren’t here! Thank god they got rid of that bitch.”

  Seth opted to leave off the argument of whose fault his absence really was and pursue this new turn of events. “Slow down, Brant, what happened yesterday?”

  Brant settled and said, “I went down to the library to talk to Alice and …”

  “The blonde with the frightened eyes?”

  “Yeah, why?”

  “Brant, don’t you know anything about body language? That girl is clearly a victim. You should leave her alone before you terrify her.”

  “Look, this isn’t about Alice, okay? Now do you want to hear about yesterday or do you want to lecture me some more?”

  Seth was taken about by Brant’s sudden return to enraged. “By all means, continue. What happened yesterday?”