Toska

by A. R. Kingston

  “No,” Victor put his head back down and smiled “I guess not.”

  We lie on the floor; our bodies entwined as we pass the new year together again for the first time in over a century. Under me, I can hear muffled voices creeping up from the bottom floor. I recognize them, but I don’t move, I don’t care to. I’m sure that Shawn and Vasily will find us eventually, for now, I just want to enjoy Victor being a free man again.

  It’s funny, on the last night of our life I would have given anything to be able to die in Victor’s arms. But, lying here like this, in his cold embrace, hearing him breathing as he strokes my hair, all I want to do is continue living. If the sentence for my sins in life is an eternal life on earth, there is no one I’d rather serve it with than Victor. I did not need to die to realize what we had was special, but dying sure did help put the importance of it into perspective. I shut my eyes to enjoy the fresh winter wind caressing our tangled bodies on the wood floor, waiting for someone to find us. The encounter with the worm is slowly fading from the forefront of my memories.

  16

  Our Absolution

  H

  ow long we lay there, sprawled out on the floor, staring up at the ceiling, I do not know. Perhaps it was only an hour, or perhaps it was more, all I know is that we were eventually found. I had just opened my eyes when I was met with a pair of chartreuse eyes staring back at me. Crouching over us was a young man in his mid-twenties with copper hair. His face lit up the moment my eyes opened, and he jumped to his feet in excitement.

  “Hey guys, guys! I found them…” he shook his head crouching back down by us, his hands resting on his knees “They seem to be okay, a bit worse for wear, but overall they appear to be fine.”

  Two sets of footsteps resounded from the hidden tunnel as the people he was yelling to made their way to the attic. In moments Father McAllister and Vasily joined the young man at staring down at the two of us. Their clothing was torn and bloodstained, Vasily still had three deep gashes on his right arm. I’m not sure what happened to them, but I am going to assume they too had a fight of their life getting here.

  “Thank God Katya,” Shawn stretched his hand down to help me up, “I thought you two were going to be dead for sure by the time we finally got here.”

  “And here I thought you had faith in me Father McAllister.” I give him a concerned look knowing that he sent me in here not thinking I could survive this, and he responded with a nervous smile. Not that they fared any better, so I won’t blame him. I turn to Vasily to look him over. “More importantly though, are you going to be alright?”

  “What? This?” He points to his mangled arm. “This is just a flesh wound; I’ll get it patched up back at headquarters. I’m just glad that we found the two of you in one piece. Good job Matroskin.” Vasily patted the young man on the back before assisting Victor back to his feet.

  I’m not sure how much I believe Vasily when he says he is alright, his arms looks to be more than just a flesh wound, and it’s still dripping blood that is saturating his gray coat. Not one to argue though, I turn to look over the new guy with a bit of suspicion. He had his hands in his jean pockets, wearing a striped wool sweater, acting as if he had belonged with this group all along. Glancing up to meet my gaze, he grinned at me, revealing a dazzling white smile. He had a mischievous look about him, almost like a child who has gotten away with something he shouldn’t have.

  “I’m sorry…” I extended my hand out to him “…I don’t think we met yet.”

  He took my hand eagerly and shook it “Oh but we have Katya, we are actually well acquainted if I may add. Though, I guess I do know Victor here a bit better, him and I have a long history together.”

  Perplexed by this strange man, I glance over at Victor who just shrugs at me in the same degree of bewilderment, he apparently has no idea what is going on either. I look back over at the young man in front of me; he giggles, seemingly amused that he knows something the rest of us don’t. Vasily walks up behind me and places a gentle hand on my shoulder, giving a reassuring squeeze to signal that the intruder is telling the truth.

  “Matroskin here…” he points to the copper-haired man “…is a changeling, a shapeshifter of sorts, and he has been keeping an eye on Victor for us since he joined the agency.”

  “Shapeshifter?” I attempt to process what he is saying. “So—he is a werewolf?”

  “Oh God no, not at all.” Shawn bursts out, vexed at my youthful ignorance. “Granted, we are very similar creatures, after all, werewolves are a class of shapeshifters. But the use of the term changeling has been reserved for shifters that are not bound to lupus form, and therefore are not affected by the changes in the lunar cycle. Matroskin here…” Father McAllister points to the young man leaning in closer to me, “…. was born as a typical house cat before he awakened.”

  “You can think of me as a werecat if you’d like though.” Matroskin beamed proudly, puffing out his chest. “I don’t mind.”

  Observing the man before me closer, I start to put the puzzle pieces together in my head; the hair, those eyes, it all starts to make sense to me. I do know this man, know him very well actually. I’ve let him into our house; I allowed him to watch Victor for me.

  “You are the tabby from the apartment building.”

  “That’s right Katya, and you have been feeding me for almost a month now.” He smiles warmly at me “I’ve been keeping an eye on Victor for the last fifty years though, so pretty much the whole time I’ve been with the order.”

  “Fifty years…how old are you?”

  “I am two hundred years old, but I’ve been awake since I was a year-old tomcat.”

  “Well, you look good for a man your age.”

  “Ah, thank you, dear Katya. You and Victor look good for people who are over one-hundred and seventy years old too.” He winks at me still grinning “Us supernatural beings age differently from the rest of the world, even those of us who have a mortal soul. For shifters, we age normally until we awaken the hidden powers within, after that our aging slows to that of a supernatural creature. I figure I still have well over a millennium left in this life.”

  “Fascinating…” I glance over the three men in the room, I wonder how old the other two are, but I don’t dare ask. I am more curious about my feline friend anyways. “But, if you were born a cat, who named you Matroskin?”

  “Why, I did, of course.” He looks up at me surprised. “After a few decades, I got a bit bored of being called Subject 173, so I picked a new name. There was this wonderful cartoon in the seventies that the goons over at the Order liked to watch, Three from Prostokvashino, one of the characters was a talking cat. Being a cat myself I always liked that, so I decided I wanted to be called by his name. I told Vasily this, and he was more than happy to change it for me.”

  “Sounds like you and Vasily are good friends then.” I giggled as Matroskin hugged a reluctant Vasily at my remark. “I take it, that it was you who informed the Order about Victor leaving the apartment then. Except…” I pause recalling what the man at the apartment told me before I left. “…how did you know where to find us if you never followed Victor to this place?”

  “That’s right when he stumbled out of the house at the screeching of that ugly bat; I made my way to Vasily to inform him of what happened. By the time the two of us made it to the Order’s headquarters though, Father McAllister was there waiting for us. He told us what you were going to do and where we could find you. The notion that the worm could finally break free of its chains sure send the headquarters into a panic.”

  “Yes, couldn’t have a full-blown apocalypse on our hands, now could we?” Vasily shakes his head looking around the demolished chamber. “That’s why the Order made the decision to come here and lend a hand; we needed to prevent the beast from breaking free at any cost.”

  “We would have gotten here sooner too…” Shawn pushed his glasses up and crossed his arms “…but we did not count on the oblivion spilling out over the
whole city block. We were not expecting to be swarmed by hellhounds and ghouls, or we would have come more prepared for a fight.”

  “Yep, sure was no walk in the park getting through those ruffians. Been so long since I was in my beast form that I have almost forgotten what it was like to tear things apart with my claw. But man, it sure felt good.” Matroskin rubbed the back of his head laughing “I was sure we were never going to find the two of you alive, but when the darkness started to reseed I figured you have managed to conquer the worm.”

  “I do have to ask…” Vasily looked over Victor and I in awe “…how did you pull this one off? The worm is far too ancient and powerful for a mere ghost to tackle.”

  Remembering everything that happened from the time I got here to this point, I am not sure what to tell him. I know how I sent the devil back to the hell he crawled out from, but at the same time I know it was not me who made him fall back. Honestly, I don’t think I had the power in me; I wouldn’t have even known what to do without my parents helping me out. Then there was all that history I learned, the future that was revealed; information that was not for mortal eyes to see or mortal ears to hear.

  And what of the people in my vision, all of them looked so familiar, I knew them somehow, but I did not know how. I don’t think there is a way for me to explain something I have no answer to. Then again, even if I did have the answer, I don’t think it is one I wished to share with the Order. A voice hidden inside me pleaded with me not to reveal everything I knew about the worm, the world was not ready for it yet, it was a voice I felt compelled to listen to. There were secrets yet to be revealed, important secrets, ones I needed to protect at any cost.

  “I guess he just lost his grip on the physical plane when I killed his link to the city.” I shrugged. It’s not that I did not trust him, but, this was as much as I was going to tell him, at least for now.

  Vasily nodded his head, seemingly satisfied with the answer he got and looked over at Shawn. “Think it’s gone for good Father?”

  “Not a chance. All Katya did was delay the worm’s inevitable manifestation in the physical plane. There is something here the worm wants, what, I can’t say for certain. All my people know is that the coming of the worm signals the end of the Fifth World. So, I’m afraid one day the battle will have to be waged in our world, but it seems for now, the world is safe once again.”

  “Just as I feared.” Vasily sighed, reaching into his coat pocket he pulled out a pack of cigarettes and a lighter. He lit one of the cigarettes. He offered one up to Victor, but he refused. Shrugging, he slid the pack back into his pocket. “Oh well, guess it's back to the Order for me. No rest for the weary, huh?”

  “Say…” Matroskin leaned back stretching out his arms. “…there is still one thing I don’t get.”

  “And what’s that?” Vasily took a drag of his cigarette.

  “Well, if Katya turned into a ghost after her murder, shouldn’t avenging her death have set her free? Yet, Nadia is dead, and Katya still remains amongst the living. Why hasn’t she crossed over yet?”

  “Astounding…” Vasily chuckles as he exhales the smoke from his lungs. “…you have been on this earth a century longer than I have, and yet you still don’t get the simplest of human emotions, do you?” He slaps Matroskin on the back as he continues to laugh at the question. “Tell you what puss, I’ll give you a hint. Maybe the thing that keeps her here is not revenge but something entirely different?”

  “What?” Matroskin looks over at Victor with wide eyes. “You can’t possibly mean that old Asian legend is true, do you? It’s only a fairy tale left over from the first settlers on Earth.”

  “I’m standing here talking to the cat for Pete’s sake. Is a shifter really going to question an old Chinese legend?”

  “Well—I suppose not, after all, stranger things have happened.”

  “Alright…” Vasily tossed his cigarette on the floor and put it out. He slung Victor's arm over his shoulder, and Matroskin joined him on the other side “…let’s get the two of you out of here before the sun comes up, or worse before the gawkers start to filter in. The last thing we need is some civilian news crew to capture a bunch of supernatural critters on tape. Bet that would go over well with the Order, they tend to make elephants out of flies. I’m sure this would at least warrant a code orange.”

  The two men started for the stairs, assisting Victor as he was still not able to walk on his own. I trail behind them with Shawn keeping a hand around my elbow to make sure I don’t fall. My head is still swimming, but without the darkness choking me I begin to feel better. It feels like a pile of rocks has been lifted off my chest. Walking out of Nadia’s apartment I see nothing that happened upstairs caused any damage to the second floor, the plaster was un-cracked, and the building remained structurally sound.

  Our small group did not stop to rest or look around; we just continued to walk down the grand staircase. This one was a lot easier to maneuver on as it was wider and I had a banister I could lean my weight on to prevent myself from tipping. At the bottom of the entryway, the place is swarming with police officers. There is police tape plastered over the windows and doors; the whole perimeter appears to be blocked off. A portly police chief approached our group, looking over Victor and I with a keen eye.

  “I see you located them.” The chief glance over at Vasily and Matroskin with an approving nod. “Good thing too, dawn is about to break. Get them into the police van out back and get them the hell out of here before some onlooker catches them. It will take you to headquarters; you can brief them once you get there.”

  “Understood sir.”

  Victor and I are ushered outside and into the back of a windowless police van. Matroskin and Shawn sit at the back with us, while Vasily climbs in through the front. With the hum of an old diesel engine, the van sets off down the street, headed in some direction that I can’t make out. I sit with my hands in my lap, Victor’s head is leaning on my shoulder, he has dozed off from the night's festivities.

  “Where are we going?” I ask quietly without looking up, afraid of the answer, even if I know what’s coming.

  “Headquarters, like the chief said.”

  “Who’s headquarters? The police, KGB…” my voice trails off, I can’t bring myself to say the last few words.

  “The Order of the Shadows” Matroskin confirms my worst fears.

  “What will become of us?”

  “Nothing really…” Matroskin shrugs across from me “…you’ll have to stay there while they process and catalog you. If you wish to leave, you will be offered to join the Order. I recommend you take them up on it; they’ll keep less tabs on you that way. There will have to be a quick cover up to explain the events of the night. Once the excitement has died down in the media, they will put in the formal paperwork to have you relocated. When the approval has been made, and a new, suitable location found, you will be granted an official release.”

  “So, you’re not going to kill us.”

  “Of course not,” Matroskin chuckles, “don’t be silly. The Order doesn’t get involved in the killing of supernatural beings, if it did I’d be dead a long time ago, and so would Father McAllister. Their philosophy is that supernatural beings and humans can coexist and maintain a symbiotic relationship. The primary goal of the Order is re-education and relocation of the supernatural; they only kill as a last resort. It’s more of a watchdog organization, keeping both humans and creatures safe while ensuring the worm does not make it into the physical realm and kicks off the apocalypse.”

  My head bobs up and down silently, as I take in everything he tells me. In part, I understand what he is saying if the Order wanted Victor dead they would never have helped me to begin with. Leaning my head on top on Victor’s, I am relieved that nothing bad will happen to him, even if our future remains uncertain. Is the Order really going to let us go? And what is all this talk of being held at headquarters and relocation, where would we go?

  Our fate is in the h
ands of the Order now. As much as I dislike the notion, I have no choice but to comply. I accepted the inevitable the moment I got in the car. The van we’re in turns and slows down to a stop, I can hear voices coming from the front cab. After a brief moment, the van begins to roll slowly, making a couple more turns before coming to a complete stop. The engine cuts off, and two doors slam at the front. I wait for the doors at the back to fling open and release us. When they finally do, Vasily beckons us to follow.

  Waking Victor up, Matroskin and Shawn assist him out of the back, he is finally starting to regain his normal vigor. We find ourselves inside a dimly lit, concrete box with fluorescent lights casting their yellow glow from above our heads. The space is sparsely covered with cars, each parked in a designated spot throughout the gray interior. This has to be one of the underground parking garages that have sprung up in the last decade or two, but which one this is I cannot tell.

  “What is this place?” I whisper, afraid of my voice carrying inside the hallowed chamber.

  “Parking garage for the Crowne Plaza Hotel,” Vasily answers so casually that I let my guard down at his nonchalant attitude.

  I know the building that he is talking of well, it has been one of my favorite buildings in the city since the day it was built. On the outside, it looks like a plain old hotel, a modern glass box of windows with its name in glowing red letters on the side. But it’s the inside that contains all the marvels which can spark a young girls fancy, or I suppose in my case the imagination of a youthful specter.

  The spacious, open lobby of the Crowne Plaza is a sight to behold for anyone, living or dead. It’s a fusion of modern and classic that blends into a timeless setting which can be enjoyed by anyone regardless of age or ethnicity. Living plants are spread around the interior, going as far as hanging off the ceiling in the pool room. At an occasional fountain, you will be delighted to discover koi fish swimming around, their bright colors complimenting the decor.