Love's Destiny (Love Trilogy #2)

by Tracey Smith

  I followed Uncle Mike up the stairs and we said goodnight at the top of the landing. I looked toward Destiny’s door as I headed to my room and again tried to convince myself that it was relief I felt at not seeing her tonight.

  The next morning like a coward I hid in my room until she was gone again. I knew I’d have to face her soon, but I was trying to put it off as long as I could. I needed time to prepare so that I could act indifferent when she told me all about her wonderful boyfriend. I was dreading that conversation.

  I spent the day job hunting, but was sure to make it home in time for dinner this time. Of course that meant I would have to face Destiny tonight, but I wouldn’t make Aunt Katherine worry again.

  I set my keys on the table in the foyer and followed the sound of voices into the kitchen. Destiny was there, perched on a stool at the counter watching her parents while they cooked. She turned and faced me as soon as I entered the room. I avoided eye contact.

  “Hey Ty, just in time for supper.” Aunt Katherine said cheerfully.

  “Great. I’m starving.” I tried to sound enthusiastic.

  “Can you set the table Destiny?” Aunt Katherine asked and it took a great deal of effort for me not to look over toward Destiny at the sound of her name.

  “So what were you up to today?” Uncle Mike asked as we all moved to the kitchen table for dinner.

  “Job hunting.” I said as I took a seat still keeping my eyes averted. I knew she was looking at me, I could feel it.

  “Really?” Aunt Katherine said sounding startled. “You don’t have to do that Tyler, if you need anything…”

  “I think it’s a great idea.” Uncle Mike interrupted. “Better than sitting around the house all the time.”

  I smiled at him for the support. He understood that what I needed most right now was to keep busy.

  “Well I guess that’s true.” Aunt Katherine conceded

  “So where did you apply?” Destiny spoke up and involuntarily I raised my eyes to look at her. My breath caught in my throat but I struggled to keep my face impassive.

  “All over.” I replied looking back down at my plate.

  She didn’t say anything else and neither did I. Uncle Mike started talking about some property he was scouting for his new art gallery and I was grateful that the attention had shifted from me.

  After dinner I made a quick escape and didn’t come back out of my room all night. Destiny didn’t come to my door.

  The following morning, I didn’t hide in my room. I came downstairs and ran into Destiny in the kitchen. She was perched on a stool eating some scrambled eggs and talking with Aunt Katherine.

  “Morning Tyler.” Aunt Katherine smiled brightly “Hungry?” she asked already scooping some eggs onto a plate for me.

  “Sure.” I said and pulled up a stool right next to Destiny.

  I didn’t look at her. I ate my eggs in silence and so did she. Aunt Katherine left the kitchen, maybe she sensed the tension and thought we needed some privacy. I wished she hadn’t. The silence was heavy in the air.

  I gobbled down my eggs as quickly as possible and then left without a word. I thought I heard Destiny huff behind me as I left the room.

  Again I devoted my day to job hunting. This time I got lucky and found a hardware store that was looking for a stock boy. The hours would work with my school schedule and I’d make enough to keep gas in the truck.

  Destiny was waiting for me on the front steps when I got home that night.

  “What’s your problem?” she demanded as soon as I stepped out of the truck.

  “Don’t have a problem.” I said coolly

  “Then why won’t you talk to me?” she asked anger still in her voice

  “We’re talking now.” I retorted

  “That’s not what I mean, and you know it.” her voice a little softer now.

  I wished she’d stay angry. Angry was easier to handle than sad.

  “If you’re itching for conversation why don’t you just call Blake?”

  “That’s not fair.” She whispered looking hurt.

  “Life isn’t fair.” I snarled as I pushed past her and walked for the door.

  If I had to look at those sad eyes another moment the façade would crack. I wouldn’t let her see the emotions that were rumbling inside me. I wouldn’t let her know how much she’d hurt me again. She’d only feel sorry for me, and I didn’t need her pity.

  “Tyler.” I heard her call after me, but I ignored her and went straight to my room.

  The silence continued between us. She didn’t try to talk to me again. I tried to convince myself it was for the best. No sense in making a fool of myself confessing feelings that would not be returned.

  The night before she left for New York she came to my room and knocked on the door. I hadn’t expected it to be her. I smiled instinctively at her before locking down my feelings and putting on the mask I’d been wearing the last several days.

  “I just wanted to say goodbye.” She told me.

  My heart ached and my stomach tensed.

  “Goodbye.” I said not able to hide the emotion in my voice this time.

  “I’ll miss you.” She whispered.

  “I’ll miss you too.” I conceded trying to smother the hope that was blooming inside me. I tried to remind myself that she’d miss me just like she’d miss her brother.

  “I’ll be back for Thanksgiving.” She told me

  “I’ll be here.” I said regaining my indifference

  She stared into my eyes for a moment and I had to look away. I couldn’t look into those beautiful blue eyes and keep my cool.

  I did look at her, however when I felt her place her hand against my cheek. My eyes met hers and I could see the turmoil there.

  “I’ll miss you.” She said again and then turned and walked away.

  Chapter 13: Juilliard

  Mom came with me to New York City to help me get settled in. Since the residence rooms come fully furnished I had packed lightly. Mom thought it would be fun to go shopping once in New York City to get the linens and accessories that I would need for my room. I definitely agreed. I was so excited to finally be arriving in New York. I’d dreamt of this day for years.

  Although I’d spent countless hours imagining the splendor of New York City nothing could have prepared me for the vibrant energy of the bustling city. I loved it! I loved the crowded streets and bright lights, the energy, the people, the noise, I loved it all. I couldn’t blink as we drove down 65th street toward Lincoln Center and the Juilliard School. I tried to absorb every sight every sound with my face practically pressed to the glass of the taxi window.

  I already had my dorm assignment. My room was on the 18th floor of the Rose Building. Mom and I carried my bags through the entrance and checked in with security before taking the elevators up to the main residence floor. The halls were crowded with students and parents, carrying luggage and searching for room numbers. Some students lounged on the couches watching the big screen TV or playing pool. Obviously they were the returning students who were already settled in. It was easy to pick out the first year students like myself, we were all scrambling around with varying expressions of fear and excitement.

  We made our way up to the 18th floor and easily found the suite that contained my room. There were four suites on each floor. Each suite contained a communal living room, 2 soundproof practice rooms, 3 double bedrooms and 2 single bedrooms with 2 1/2 bathrooms.

  The single rooms were reserved for returning students. I would be sharing my double room with a dance major from Oklahoma City named Carrie. I had been given her contact information when I received my room assignment and she and I had emailed each other a few times over the last week. She hadn’t arrived yet.

  “So what’s first?” Mom asked excitedly as she helped me unpack “Dinner or shopping?”

  “I’m starving!” I replied laughing at her exuberance

  “We really should have brought your Aunt Amy along.” Mom sighed,
“She would love to have free reign to decorate this room.”

  “I think we’ll manage.” I said putting my arm around my mom “I’m really glad you came with me.”

  “I couldn’t send my baby off to New York City all alone.” Mom said squeezing me “I’m still not sure how I’m going to leave.”

  I kissed her temple and turned away to finish filling the small dresser and closet with the clothes I’d brought. I didn’t want to clutter the bathroom with my personal items, so I left them in my travel bag on top of the dresser. I looked around at the room and took inventory of what I needed. Bedding was definitely top of the list if I planned on sleeping.

  “Ok, dinner first and then shopping.” I said and Mom nodded in agreement.

  We walked along 65th Street taking in the sights and sounds as the sun set and the city came alive. We ate at a small bistro and then easily found a large department store that had everything we needed. All I had planned on buying was a bedding set and pillows, but Mom was an unstoppable force.

  By the time we’d left the store I not only had a bedding set being delivered but also a small stereo system, television, phone, microwave and lap top computer. Mom ignored my insistence that all this stuff wasn’t necessary and finally I stopped resisting and allowed her to splurge. She seemed to be having just as much fun as I was.

  On return to the residence hall we stopped off at the 11th floor Residence Life Office and rented a small refrigerator for the room as well. Mom oversaw the delivery of everything we’d purchased, helping me set up the small kitchenette with the microwave and rented refrigerator.

  “You need a coffee pot.” Mom frowned as if frustrated that she hadn’t already thought of it.

  “I’ll manage.” I assured her “There are plenty of coffee shops nearby”

  She ignored me as she moved to my room and straightened the deep purple comforter over the bed again, adjusting and readjusting the gold trimmed throw pillows. I watched her from the door of the room smiling at how reluctant she was to admit that I had what I needed and her job was done.

  We set up the TV in the communal living area and the laptop and phone on the desk in my room. I placed a small picture that I’d brought of our family on top of the dresser and smiled at how that one small addition made me feel at home.

  Other students were bustling in and out of the suite now, unpacking and settling in. Mom looked around one last time, I could see the desperate need to find something else to do. Any excuse to stay a little longer. We both walked over to the large windows overlooking the Hudson River. The view was magnificent.

  “Your father would love to paint this.” Mom commented looking out over the moonlit view. I nodded silently.

  The room was crowded now and Mom reluctantly turned away from the window and looked into my eyes.

  “You’re going to be ok.” It wasn’t a question but a statement.

  “I know.”

  “I expect you to write.”

  “I will.”

  “And you’ll be home for the holidays. No excuses.”

  “Of course.” My throat was getting tight in anticipation of the inevitable goodbye.

  “I love you.” Mom whispered as she pulled me close for one last hug

  “I love you too.” I said as I buried my face in her hair the way I’d often done as a child. I absorbed her scent and committed it to memory.

  “Okay then.” She said cheerfully pulling back and holding me at arm’s length for one last look. Mom took a deep breath and I could see the tears she was holding back.

  “You’ll write and call.” She said again.

  “I can’t if you don’t leave.” I laughed back the tears that were threatening to spill over.

  “Okay then.” She said again nodding briskly. “Talk to you soon.”

  “Talk to you soon.” I repeated, it was easier than goodbye.

  I stood with my back to the window and watched my mom walk out of the room. She glanced back once at the door and I smiled at her for support. As she disappeared from view I felt a mixture of sadness and exhilaration. I was on my own.

  I walked into my room and sat on the edge of the bed. Looking around at the small space that was my new home.

  “Oh my gosh!” a southern tinted voice squealed from the doorway.

  I turned to see a cute little strawberry blonde with big blue eyes and pixie like features, she was tiny and delicate and her face held the innocence of a child.

  “Isn’t this amazing? This is just amazing!” She drawled in that southern accent with a huge smile spreading from ear to ear. She walked into the room and spun in a circle giggling. I sat on the edge of the bed watching her in amusement. I wasn’t sure if she’d even noticed me sitting here yet.

  “Oh! You must be Destiny!” she exclaimed when she finally stopped spinning and took notice of me.

  I smiled and stood to extend my hand, I was a good six inches taller than her, she couldn’t be more than five foot tall.

  “Carrie Anne Moss.” She introduced herself with that adorable southern drawl shaking my hand.

  “Destiny Carter.” I replied. “It’s nice to finally meet you in person.”

  “It is isn’t it? I mean this is all just so amazing! Have you ever seen anything so amazing? I’ve never been anywhere so amazing!” She was bubbling with excitement

  “Amazing.” I agreed and we both laughed.

  I helped Carrie unpack while she told me all about her family back in Oklahoma. She was the middle child of 6 siblings. Her family had a farm in a rural area just outside Oklahoma City. She had been taking dance lessons since childhood and had worked as a carhop at a 50’s style diner all through high school in addition to babysitting every weekend to save up enough money to come to Juilliard.

  Dancing was the only thing she’d ever wanted to do and she overflowed with excitement at finally making it to New York to realize her dreams. Her enthusiasm was contagious.

  “So what about you?” she asked as she plopped down on the homemade patchwork quilt that covered her bed. “You’re from San Diego, right?”

  “Yeah, my dad’s an artist and my mom’s a chef.” I told her feeling like it was my turn to share. She’d already told me so much about herself.

  “I have a little brother named Chance who is 8 and can already charm the pants off anyone.” I laughed.

  I told her about San Diego, about the school I’d attended, the violin lessons I’d taken since childhood. I told her about everything back home, except Tyler. He was in my mind, but for some reason I didn’t talk about him. My memories of Tyler were too personal, too painful to share.

  Carrie and I stayed up late into the night, sharing and talking about our lives. I could tell already that we were going to be great friends. Finally we decided we should get some sleep before the sun came up and we both settled into bed.

  With the lights out and the room quiet the one thing I’d been avoiding thinking about all night came to the forefront of my mind. Tyler. As I lay in bed trying to fall asleep I wondered what he was doing, how he was doing, I wondered if he was thinking about me.

  Chapter 14: New Friends

  The big house seemed strangely empty with Destiny gone. I tried not to think about her too much, but she was always in the back of my mind. When Chance did something funny, I imagined how she would have laughed or what she would have said. When I passed the corridor that led to her rooms on the second floor I tried not to look towards them, but I always did as if I expected her to materialize even though I knew she was thousands of miles away in New York.

  In addition to working a few days a week at the hardware store I also ran deliveries for Aunt Katherine’s bakery. Whenever I came by the shop I always looked for Destiny behind the register knowing she wouldn’t be there. Uncle Mike had just opened his art gallery and Chance and I spent a lot of time there helping with painting the walls or arranging the displays. I imagined how proud Destiny would’ve been of her father’s gallery. Even though I stayed
very busy, I took her with me wherever I went.

  My junior year of high school was off to a good start. My teachers had no idea about the trouble I’d been in back in LA. I had a fresh start. I studied hard and got good grades, school had never been easy for me but when I applied myself I did well. I figured I owed it to Uncle Mike and Aunt Katherine for giving me a second chance. I didn’t take anything for granted anymore.

  “I think your dad needs some help at the gallery today.” I told Chance as I drove him to school. “He’s supposed to be getting a big delivery this afternoon and he’ll need help uncrating it all.”

  “Okay, but I have baseball tryouts at 6. Can you take me?”

  “Sure kid. We’ll put in a couple hours at the gallery and then I’ll take you to the ball fields.”

  “Dad said you used to play.”

  “Yeah”

  “How come you stopped?”

  “I don’t know.” I answered, not sure how to explain to an 8 year old the complexities of the situation. “But I wish I never had. I loved baseball.” That much was true.

  “Me too! I hope I make the team.” He said excitedly. It reminded me of how I was when I was his age.

  “We’ll have to start practicing.” I told him and he beamed at me.

  “Really? You’ll practice with me?” he was bouncing in the seat.

  “Sure kid.” I ruffled his hair as I pulled to a stop in front of his school.

  “Thanks Tyler, see you after school.” He shouted back as he climbed out of the truck.

  As I drove a few more blocks to my school I thought about what it had been like to be 8. Inevitably it made me think of Destiny, she had been a big part of my childhood. I parked the truck and walked into the building trying to push her out of my mind.

  I didn’t even notice the group of girls huddled near my locker until one of them broke away and approached me.

  “Hi Tyler.” I heard a shy voice say and I peered around the locker door to see a timid brunette looking up at me with wide scared eyes. I heard her friends giggling behind her and looked over her shoulder at the group of girls.