MILITARY ROMANCE: The War Within Himself (Alpha Bad Boy Marine Army Seal) (Contemporary Military Suspense & Thriller Romance)

by Claire Branson

  “So what! Call him!”

  “Taylor, stop it.” She waved the thought away.

  “If you guys had a connection, then he’s thinking about you right now too. Call him!”

  Chelsea hesitated for a moment, thinking it over. “You think so? Won’t he think it’s too soon?”

  “No! Life is too short to worry about playing games. If you like him, call him.” Taylor emphasized each word as she said them.

  “Okay, okay!” she said in surrender. “I’ll text him.” She could feel a knot in her stomach just thinking about it. All of her life Chelsea had had a horrible fear of rejection, and she still couldn’t shake it. What if she scared him off? What if he wasn’t actually interested in her? It made her sick just thinking about it. She looked up to see Taylor watching her closely with excitement in her eyes. Taking a deep breath, she began to type out the message on her phone, and after backspacing everything several times, she finally settled on something simple.

  Chelsea: Hey! This is Chelsea.

  Chelsea set her phone down on the table and tried her hardest to act as if it weren’t eating her alive to not check it every five seconds. Not even a minute had passed before her phone let out a loud beep. She nearly jumped off the couch trying to get to it as fast as possible.

  Ben: Chelsea who?

  She could have cried she was so embarrassed. Taylor scooted in closer to her to read over her shoulder. She inhaled a sharp breath and gave Chelsea a look of pity. Within seconds her phone beeped again.

  Ben: I’m totally kidding. Sorry. That probably wasn’t funny. What’s up?

  Taylor let out a laugh. “Funny and cute! That’s the whole package.”

  “Not funny. He made me feel like a complete idiot.” Chelsea pretended as hard as she could to be mad, but she was so overwhelmingly relieved that she knew it wasn’t very convincing.

  Chelsea: Not too much. What about you?

  Ben: Nothing. I had a great time with you last night. I was actually just thinking about you.

  Taylor squealed so loudly that Chelsea had to cover her ears. “Can you relax?”

  “He said he was thinking about you! How are you relaxed?”

  Chelsea: I had fun too. Thanks for everything.

  Taylor smacked her arm and gave her an exasperated look. “Ask him out, you goof!”

  “What? No. If he wants to go out he’ll ask me. That’s how it works.”

  “In the fifties! Don’t play any games. Just ask him out if you want to go out.” Chelsea sat in silence and thought over the possible outcomes of the situation. On one hand, if she waited to ask him, he may lose interest and think that she didn’t want to go out again. But on the other hand, he could think she was desperate and pathetic if she asked now.

  Ben: Do you have plans tonight?

  Her heart skipped a beat. He wanted to go out with her again! She couldn’t believe that someone like him would be interested in someone like her. Chelsea began to type that she and Taylor had plans when she got slapped in the arm. “Don’t you dare turn him down! We can drink wine and sit around gossiping any night.” Biting her lip, Chelsea erased what she had previously written and tried again.

  Chelsea: Not yet.

  Ben: I thought I might show you around the city. Would you be up for it?

  Chelsea: That sounds like fun.

  Ben: Great. I’ll pick you up at 7.

  *

  “Taylor!” Chelsea yelled from the bathroom in exasperation.

  “What?” she yelled back.

  “Help me pick which earrings look best!” Within seconds Taylor came bouncing through the doorway, excited to be included. Chelsea held an earring up to each ear as Taylor looked them over thoroughly, taking her job very seriously.

  “The ones on the left,” she finally replied.

  “Are you sure? They’re not too flashy?”

  “Chelsea, it’s a first date. Flashy is what you want. Speaking of flashy, let me grab something.” As Taylor scurried off to her room, Chelsea hung the beautiful teardrop diamond earrings from her ears. After an entire day of scouring her closet, she had finally settled on a pair of jeans and a simple chiffon blouse that hung loosely from her. “Here!” Taylor exclaimed as she shoved a lipstick tube at Chelsea.

  “This is really dark,” Chelsea protested, looking at the color.

  “Come on. It’ll look great on you. Plus, you need to spice up your boring outfit.”

  “Hey now!” Chelsea laughed in fake offense. “I was trying to go more casual.”

  “I’m just kidding. You look great.” A loud knock came from the front door, causing Chelsea’s stomach to drop. “I’ll get the door. Hurry! Put that on.” Taylor rushed off to open the door while Chelsea quickly applied the lipstick. Taylor was right, it did look really good on her. She could hear her dad in the back of her mind reminding her that only women of the night wore lipstick like that. Chelsea quickly pushed the thought from her head. She would not allow his opinions to make her feel less about herself. “Just one minute!” she heard Taylor yell.

  Taylor came quickly back into the bathroom and dramatically mouthed, “Oh my god.”

  “Right? Isn’t he cute?”

  “Sexy is more like it! Hurry up. You don’t want to keep him waiting,” Taylor whispered. Looking herself over one more time in mirror, Chelsea made her way into the front room to see Ben sitting on her couch. He was even cuter than she had remembered.

  Quickly standing when she walked in the room, he said, “Wow. You look great.”

  “Thank you. You do too.”

  “You kids have fun now. Don’t keep her out too late!” Taylor said as they walked out the door of their apartment. “I have an app that tracks her phone! Keep that in mind!” she yelled down the hall behind them.

  Chelsea let out a bashful laugh. “She’s kidding, by the way…. Not about the app—we really do have that—but about her implying you were going to kill me and ditch my dead body…” The words fell from her mouth like vomit despite how hard she tried to hold them back. She silently cursed herself for being so awkward.

  “You’re cute when you’re nervous.” Ben laughed. “She would be right to imply it though…” He gave her a devilish grin. “Only kidding. I promise not to murder you…or at least not to ditch your body somewhere…”

  His light sense of humor made her relax and feel more at ease. She knew he was being sincere when he told her that he thought her nervousness was cute, but she still felt stupid. It was one thing she was always extremely self-conscious about: word vomiting when she got anxious.

  Once they got out onto the street, Ben walked straight to a motorcycle parked by the curb and handed her one of the helmets off the back of it. “Wait. We’re riding this?”

  “Yeah. It’s a lot easier to store a bike in the city than a car.” He could see the nervous look in Chelsea’s eyes as she looked over the machine in front of her. “Wait. You’ve never ridden one ’fore?” She shook her head no, looking ashamed. “It’s not as scary as it seems. Promise.”

  She still hadn’t moved from the sidewalk as she weighed it over in her mind. “You trust me?” Ben asked her. Without needing to think, she nodded yes. “Give me your hand.” Chelsea obliged by putting her hand in his and allowing him to pull her closer to the motorcycle. “Just swing your leg over the edge here.” It warmed her heart to see how gently he was guiding her through learning something new. “Ya got it! Now just put your arms around my waist. You can squeeze me as tight as you need to. You ready?”

  Hesitantly, Chelsea nodded, and when she realized he couldn’t see her behind him, she said, “I think so!”

  “All right then. Hold on.” With that they were off and whipping through traffic. She clung tightly to him and tucked her face into his shoulder to avoid the cold wind. They only drove for a few minutes before they pulled into an alley and he cut the engine. “We’re here.”

  “Where is here? Where you’re going to leave my body?” she asked jokingly as she
looked up and down the dark, abandoned alley.

  “I have a surprise for ya. You’ll live through it, don’t worry.” He helped her off the bike and opened the back door to a building that lined the alley with a key he pulled from his pocket.

  “What is this place?” she asked as he hit the light switch and things slowly became visible. It was a small, dark space with pub tables shoved against the walls.

  “It used to be an old bar.”

  “Why do you have a key to it?” she asked quizzically.

  Ben looked around the room and smiled. “Because I own it.”

  Chelsea looked at him with confusion. “What?”

  “It went into foreclosure a few months ago, and I bought it. Just closed on it a week ago. You’re the first person I’ve brought here actually.”

  “Wow.” A large smile covered Chelsea’s face. “That’s so great. What are you going to do with it?”

  He looked so proud of himself that it made her heart melt. Maybe he wasn’t as wild as she had thought; buying a business was a hugely responsible thing. Here he was sharing a huge part of himself with her, opening up. “I’m going to turn it into a biker bar. Nothing fancy, just beer and pub foods. But it’ll be mine, ya know?”

  “That’s awesome. What about wine?” she teased.

  “I think I could keep a bottle or two behind the bar for you.” Taking a few steps toward her, he put his hands on her waist and pulled her against him. “Want to see the best part?”

  “Well of course.” He grabbed her hand and pulled her through the small kitchen to a staircase in the back.

  “This will all be storage up here. Maybe eventually I’ll turn it into an apartment, but just storage for now,” he explained as they walked through a large empty room and up another staircase. “But this…this is the best part. You ready?” She nodded happily.

  When he swung the door to the roof open, her breath escaped her. He had hung strings of lights all over. In the middle of all of it was a little pub table set for two with a picnic basket beside it. “Wow,” she said quietly as she took it all in.

  “Look at the view,” he said with excitement. Walking over to the rooftop ledge together, they took in a wonderful view of the skyline that seemed to go on for miles.

  “It’s so beautiful.”

  “A beautiful night with a beautiful woman.” Ben turned to her, smiling, and leaned down to ever so gently plant a kiss on her lips. As he pulled back, he left her wanting for more.

  “This is all so great. Thank you.”

  “Don’t thank me yet.” He laughed. “You haven’t seen the piss-poor excuse I brought for dinner.” They enjoyed different types of cheese and wine while overlooking a once-in-a-lifetime view. Hours went by while they told stories and learned more and more about each other. They learned about each other’s pasts and their goals for the future. It was as if they had known each other their entire lives.

  Just like all good things, the night had to come to an end. Walking Chelsea to her door, Ben said, “I have something to confess.” Great. He’s married or something. I knew it was too good to be true.

  “What is it?”

  “I actually know an editor at Trend.”

  “Trend, as in the magazine?” she asked in disbelief. Trend was the largest fashion magazine in the US, one that she had been an avid reader of since she was in junior high.

  “Yeah. I didn’t want to tell you earlier because I didn’t want you to think I was trying to like bribe you or something.” He looked her in the eyes with a charming smile. “But I did get an appointment for you to meet with her tomorrow morning. Only if you want to.”

  “If I want to? Of course I want to!” she exclaimed. She jumped off the ground, wrapping her legs around him, and kissed him forcefully. “Thank you so much! You have no idea how much this means to me!”

  Ben let out a laugh. “Glad you want to go. I didn’t want it to be weird or anything.”

  “No, not at all. Thank you so much, Ben! And thank you for everything tonight too.”

  Smiling from ear to ear, Ben planted another kiss on her lips and said, “Not a problem. I’ll drop by tomorrow afternoon to see how it went.” Chelsea watched him disappear down the hall before finally going inside. She leaned against the door as it shut behind her and slid down to the ground. It had all been like a dream come true.

  Sitting in the large modern lobby, Chelsea could not have been more nervous. The receptionist across the room cleared her throat, and when Chelsea looked up at her, she was staring at her shaking foot, which was tapping on the ground. “Sorry,” Chelsea said uncomfortably.

  As the phone on her desk beeped, she picked it up and listened intently to what was being said on the other end. “Ms. White will see you now,” the receptionist said as she placed the phone back on its receiver. She stood and gestured for Chelsea to follow her down a wide hallway lined with glass offices. Stopping at the very end of the hall, the receptionist opened a door to a large office space that was impeccably decorated.

  “Good morning, darling,” an elegant woman said from across her huge desk.

  “Good morning, Miss White.” Chelsea extended her hand to shake hers, but she showed no interest.

  “Chelsea, was it?”

  “Yes, ma’am.”

  “Please, just call me Jessica.” Although everything she was saying was nice, she had a rude, fake tone in her voice that put Chelsea instantly on edge.

  “Thank you, Jessica, for meeting with me. I really appreciate your time. I have been sending stories in to y’all for years now. This really is a dream—” Before she could finish, Jessica interrupted her with a mocking tone.

  “Y’all? Where are you from, sweetie?”

  “Kansas.”

  “Ah. I assumed the Midwest or the South but couldn’t place the accent.” Jessica strolled around her desk confidently and sat on the edge of it. “He did always like the new innocent ones.”

  “Excuse me?” Chelsea asked in confusion.

  “I was new to town when we met too, you know? Can I be honest with you about something? Girl to girl?”

  Trying to ignore the sinking feeling in her stomach, she said, “Okay.”

  “He’s using you.”

  Chelsea thought she might throw up.

  “I mean, don’t get me wrong.” Jessica laughed. “He’s a great guy. He just knows how to get what he wants by giving you what you want. It’s classic Ben.”

  Swallowing down the bile that rose in her throat, Chelsea quickly moved from her chair toward the door. “Thank you for your time.” She barely made it to the street before the sobs overtook her. She couldn’t believe she had been so stupid to think that this woman actually cared to see her work. All she cared about was scaring her away from Ben. Could the things Jessica said about Ben really be true? She couldn’t believe that she had allowed herself to be used yet again.

  *

  Ben had to knock several times on the door before it slowly creaked open and Taylor stuck her head out. “Go away!” she growled.

  “What?”

  “She doesn’t want to see you.”

  “Taylor, what is going on?” he asked in utter confusion.

  “You know what!”

  “What is going on? Is she okay?” Ben didn’t wait for her to answer before he pushed his way into their apartment.

  “Hey!” Taylor yelled, and she tried her best to push back against his force. Eventually she gave up and allowed him to enter. “I’m sorry,” she said to Chelsea, who was sitting on the couch with a bottle of wine. “I tried to keep him out. Do you want me to call the police?”

  “No. It’s okay.” Chelsea stood up and turned to face him.

  Seeing her bloodshot and puffy eyes made his stomach drop. “Chelsea, can you please tell me what is going on? Are you okay? I’ve been trying to call you all day.”

  “Why don’t you ask Jessica how I am?” She spat the words like fire off her tongue, fueled by the wine running through her vein
s. Her head felt heavy, her judgement clouded.

  “You didn’t get the job?” Ben asked, sympathy heavy in his voice.

  Chelsea let out a forced laugh and took another sip of wine. “Oh, no. But don’t worry, I wasn’t expecting to anyway.” She tried her hardest to make it sound light and casual even though she had been crying about it all day.

  “Then why are you upset?”

  “Because Jessica shed a little more light on who you are. She let me in on your little game you play with girls who are new to the city. Well, I won’t be a pawn in your game! I’m not that type of girl. I can’t believe I was so stupid to fall for all your lines!” she yelled through the tears that poured down her cheeks.

  Ben was genuinely confused about where she was coming from. “What are you talking about? What did Jessica say about me?”

  “That you were giving me what I wanted so that you could get what you wanted. She told me you do it with all the new ‘innocent’ girls you meet. Hell, she said you did it to her. Do you know how stupid that made me feel?!” She couldn’t control the anger that flooded over her. “She didn’t even care to see my work. She only gave me an interview to scare me away from you. Do you know how awful that feels?”

  Chelsea felt the tears beginning to well up in her eyes again. She could never put into words how crushed she was after having her hopes so high for the interview. She felt so stupid for thinking someone at Trend would actually care to see her work.

  “Stop!” Ben yelled, getting her attention. Very slowly he reached over and grabbed the wine glass from her hand, setting it down on the table. Although she tried to pull away, he took her hands in his and looked deep into her eyes. “I’m so sorry, Chelsea. I should have never sent you there.”

  “Why? So I would have never caught on to your little game?”

  “Because I knew she still had feelings for me. I should have known she would do something like this if she thought it would be one less obstacle between us.” Chelsea tried to pull away again, tired of hearing it, but Ben held her hands firmly in his. “We used to have something. That part was true, but none of the rest of it is. You have to believe me.”