A Little Bit of Crazy (Little Bits)

by A. E. Murphy

  I snort and nod, “Yeah but it’s so relaxing.”

  “He’s really nice though. I mean, he barely knows you yet he came to see you.”

  “Definitely a nice guy.”

  “What are you two talking about?” we both look up at James stood in the doorway smiling at us.

  I scowl and tape my watch feigning anger, “What time do you call this?”

  His eyes widen, “I was…”

  “Don’t give me excuses, you are late! Are you fucking somebody?”

  “What?”

  “Don’t lie to me! Where the hell have you been?” he stumbles back from the anger of my tone and the glare aimed for him.

  “I was…”

  “Let me guess, in the office. Yeah sure you were,” I say but can’t keep my face straight any longer. A smile breaks through. “Hey baby good day at work?”

  He blinks a few times, “Are you… but you? Did… wait what?”

  “He’s losing his mind in his old age,” I mumble to Marie who has her face buried in a pillow, her body convulsing with laughter. “Hey baby, want to eat popcorn and watch Damon eat some people?”

  He shakes his head and kisses me on the forehead, “No, I’m going to order food. You staying for dinner Marie?”

  “Nah, I better go. Got a hot date, see you tomorrow,” she smiles and hugs me before skipping out of the room. James follows her out as I press play on the hot vampire series.

  James returns a few minutes later. I watch with drool down my chin as he strips down to his boxers and dives on the bed next to me. Reaching over with my hand I tickle his back. He peeks up at me, a crooked grin on his face and releases a relaxing sigh.

  “Is it safe to say that even though everything bad that’s happened I’m so fucking happy,” he smiles and throws his arms over my thighs. “You make me happy Maya.”

  “I’m glad,” I say so quietly he doesn’t hear. Truly I am glad, he deserves better than me and I’m hoping I’m giving him at least a small portion of that better if that makes sense. He means a lot to me, a hell of a lot and it’s sad knowing that there’s someone out there so much better for him than I am.

  “I was thinking,” he says and rests his chin on his crossed arms. “I’m going to do what you’ve done, train a couple of people up. Then I want us to go on a month long vacation. Our belated honeymoon. What you reckon?”

  “Hmm,” I say thoughtfully before smiling a little. “I think sun, sea, your golden body between my legs sounds bloody amazing.”

  He leans up and kisses me sweetly. “Thanks for trusting me. I know it can’t be easy for you but I promise to discuss anything major with you as I did before.”

  “I trust you,” I say softly.

  “I’m very grateful for that.”

  “Don’t be, you shouldn’t need to prove yourself to me. I just regret not making this decision sooner. You deserve so much more than how I’ve treat you.”

  “Does this mean I can pay you back for the apartment?”

  “Stop being an idiot, what’s mine is yours and all that. We paid for it together.”

  “If you say so,” he sighs and lifts his back a little, telling me to continue stroking him. I laugh when he purrs like a cat. Ooh a cat.

  “Can we get a kitten when we get our new place?”

  He hums, I don’t think he’s listening.

  “Can I do you up the bum with a strap on?”

  “Hmm…”

  “Can I set your hair on fire?”

  “Hmm…”

  “Is it true you used to lick willies for fun?”

  His head pops up, a mischievous grin on his face, “Who told you?” I throw my head back and laugh and slap him on the back. He grunts and reburies his head in his arm. “Keep going.” I sigh and lightly tickle his smooth back with my nails.

  The next two weeks fly by without incident. Sylvia and I have come to an understanding, we are actually getting on and speaking every couple of days. We have plans to host a charity ball when I’m feeling up to scratch.

  Our new house should be fully furnished soon, I’m feeling almost perfect. Marie and I are even closer than before whereas Jessica and I are drifting apart a little. I don’t see her much. Every free moment has been spent with my husband, Marie and Summer. It’s safe to say we are going strong. Me and James I mean. When I’m not driving him crazy with my crazy humor.

  I sit and eat my fruit and yoghurt whilst James rushes around. “Where are my damn keys?”

  “On the dresser in the bedroom,” I say around a mouth full of food.

  He disappears and I hear a jingle, “Thanks gorgeous,” he kisses me on the forehead and runs out the door faster than if the hounds of hell were snapping at his heels. I giggle and dump my empty bowl in the sink.

  I have a mission, a mission involving my supposed brother in law. My bare feet pat on the cool wood as I head to my cave, aka bedroom, where all of my stuff is located. I scan the email Phelps sent and call Marie.

  She arrives half an hour later, I fill her in on the situation. “So you’re just going to go round there and demand for him to do a DNA test? Don’t you think James should be there?”

  “No, I want him to be the guy before James knows,” I say with a small smile. “He spoke about him just last week, the private detectives he has hired are fucking morons. I found Lucas in just a few days with the help of the senator and a few ties in social services.”

  “Ok, I get that, just be careful. You don’t want to stir up something.” She says with a smile as we weave through traffic. I fluff up my hair in the mirror and apply lipgloss. I’m wearing a black business suit with a tight skirt. So I don’t seem threatening when I approach him. Damn, what am I going to say? I kind of wish I’d told James but at the same time I feel like I’m doing the right thing.

  “Remember, you need to order the DNA test, I can’t have people finding out and it getting back to James,” I say with a small smile. Marie grins wickedly, “I feel like an FBI agent. This is so cool!”

  “Turn in here,” I say as we pull into a middle class neighborhood. The houses are only two story and not very easy on the eye. I see a boy stood with five older teenagers, all of them with their hoods up and cans of beer in their hands. Kid included. “Jesus.”

  “If he is your family, let’s hope he’s not like the others round here. I’ve heard of this neighborhood, it’s really bad.”

  “I’ve not, Christ. Lock the car,” I hiss as eyes follow my fancy car down the street. There’s a white, well grey house that should be white on the end with a low chain link fence surrounding it. Marie pulls into the drive and I notice birthday banners in the window and pink balloons tied to the metal gate. There’s a pickup right ahead with my little pony stickers on the back. Definitely at the right place.

  “Let’s go,” Marie smiles.

  I shake my head, “I should do this alone.”

  “Boring,” she sighs and I notice a curtain twitch. I climb out of the car and walk across the gravel to the front door.

  As soon as I raise my hand to knock it opens. A man stands before me, he’s stunning and the double of my James. Same dark hair same shocking green eyes.

  “Can I help you?” he says, that familiar smirk on his face. I realize I’m gawking.

  “Are you Lucas Grant?” I say and he nods. “I’m Maya. Umm… can I come in for a moment?”

  “I’m not in the habit of inviting strangers inside,” he says and steps outside.

  “Right,” I inwardly cringe, I’m such an idiot. “Umm…”

  A little brown haired girl comes darting out of the house. She cuddles her father’s leg, she’s the double of him. “Daddy, who is it?” She says in the sweetest voice I’ve ever heard.

  “Amelia, this is Maya. She’s a stranger, go back in the house.”

  The girl sizes me up, “It’s my birthday. Have you got me a present?”

  “Amelia,” her father chastises.

  “Umm,” I stammer and reach into my poc
ket. I pull out a fifty dollar bill and hand it to her. “Sorry it’s not much, it’s all I have on me.”

  “Money!” she squeals as her dad looks at me like I’m crazy.

  “I’m sorry, if I’d known it was her birthday I would’ve put some in a card,” I realize I’m mumbling. The little girl thanks me and disappears inside. “Anyway. This is going to sound odd but do you remember having a younger brother? Called James?”

  “I don’t have any family, I was raised in care. Why?” he says and shuts the door. “And was that a real fifty dollar note. Normally you give five bucks or summin. Not fifty dollars.”

  “I got an apartment for my last birthday, I’m no good at this. I’m what you call a spoilt bitch,” I giggle and his lips quirk. “So you don’t remember having a brother?”

  He shakes his head, “I don’t remember much. I had a err,” he turns and shows me a half moon shaped scar hidden under his thick hair on the back of his head. “I was in an accident last year. My memories before then are a little fuzzy.

  CHAPTER FIFTEEN

  “I’m terribly sorry to hear that. In a way it gives me hope. James, he’s my husband.” I say and he opens the door again. With a sigh he motions for me to follow him in. I step over a Barbie car and follow him into a tiny room with little to no furniture. I sit on a wicker couch and smile at the little girl playing with a toy kitchen. “So, yeah. That’s why I’m here. He’s been looking for his brother for years.”

  “Well, I don’t have much to offer…” he starts to say but I hold my hand up.

  “Actually, he doesn’t know I’m here. I’ve been doing some searching of my own. I wanted to make sure you are the guy before telling him.”

  “You want to make sure he doesn’t get his hopes up. I get that,” he says with a nod. “So what is it you need?”

  “I was hoping you’d agree to a DNA test. To see if you are related.”

  “What’s elated?” the little girl says, standing right next to me.

  “Related, is like you and your daddy. People in your family who have the same blood. Mean related,” I try to explain. She nods and disappears into her kitchen again. I look back up at Lucas. “I would make it worth your while. For the trouble. All it would be is a swab on the inside of your mouth and a couple of weeks wait. I’ll pay for it, you wouldn’t have to do anything.”

  He sits back and steeples his fingers under his chin, “I don’t want your money. This benefits me as well. If it turns out he is my brother…”

  I grin, unable to contain my excitement, “That is absolutely fantastic. Umm… we are still waiting on the test so. Can I call you? When it arrives.”

  “Sure.”

  I hand him my card, he pulls out his phone and sends me a quick ‘hi’.

  “Do you have a picture of him?”

  I pull out my own phone and show him a picture from our wedding day. His eyebrows shoot up. “You look just like each other,” I say and he laughs whilst nodding in agreement. “Well, thank you for your time. I’ll get out of your hair now.”

  “We are doing the cake,” Amelia says and tugs on my sleeve. “Stay for the cake.”

  “It’s her birthday, you better do as she says,” he grins and I shrug, “I’m not very good with kids, I umm… never really had any kids in my family. It was just me and my dad growing up so if I mess up I apologize.”

  “Don’t worry about it,” he says and pulls the curtains closed. I send a quick text to Marie telling her to come back in a bit and I hear my car vacate the drive. “Guessing your friends gone? You could have invited her in.”

  “It’s fine, I’m already enough of an intrusion.”

  He laughs and it sounds so familiar and warm, “You’re not. I promise.”

  “Have none of her friends come?” I say as he lights four candles on a pony cake.

  “No,” he replies a little curtly. “I couldn’t afford to do food so just me and her. Her mother didn’t have any family either and we’ve never had any real friends that have been there.”

  “I know about your wife, I’m terribly sorry for your loss. It came up in the investigation,” I say quietly and touch his arm.

  He nods and his sorrowful eyes turn into smiling eyes as completes lighting the candles. “You ready baby girl?”

  “Yeah,” Amelia squeals from the front room. I’m just sad that he couldn’t even afford a buffet. It’s so sad. “Huwwy up daddy!”

  “You ready?” he says. I nod and follow him in singing happy birthday. Standing in the corner I clap and watch as the green eyed angel blows out her candles.

  When she’s done he cuts it up and I have to take a slice apparently it’s none negotiable.

  “Thanks for her, birthday money,” he says after a minutes silence.

  “Trust me, it’s nothing. Are you sure you’re ok with this? A stranger showing up demanding your DNA. How do you know I’m not going to clone you and do naughty things to your double?”

  He throws his head back and laughs, “I’d say that’s a very lucky double.”

  “Daddy, can we go to the park. Pleeease?”

  “No,” he replies and glances at me. “The park here, it’s not even a park anymore. They put new equipment in, the next day it was trashed and covered in graffiti.”

  “I tell you what,” I say and prod the kid in the stomach. “If you’re a good girl I’ll come back and if it’s ok with your daddy we’ll go to the playhouse and have some dinner.”

  “Really?”

  “Yup, but you have to ask your daddy.”

  “Daddy, can we?”

  “I don’t have a problem with it,” he gives me an appreciative smile. “We’ll have to wait though sweetie.”

  “My treat,” I add and pull my phone out. I have two missed calls from James, I ignore them for now. “So, what is it you do for a living? You’re in construction?”

  He shakes his head, “No, I lost my job last month. Company went bust. Now I’m working at Walmart. Stocking shelves, it’s a glorious job. What about you?”

  Christ, this family is breaking my heart. “I own Johnson’s pharmaceutical company. We make…”

  “No shit, I knew I recognized you,” he lets out a laugh and shakes his head before reaching under the couch and pulling out Gossip magazine. He flips a few pages, looks at the pictures and then up at me, back to the pictures. “Maya Johnson partying it up in Vegas with unknown males two months after getting married and a month after burying her father.”

  “The males were there because I was winning,” I grumble suddenly embarrassed by my actions. “And I was in Vegas to take my mind off things.”

  “I’m sorry to hear about your father,” he says softly. I nod and smile. “Did you win much?”

  “Huh?”

  “Vegas, did you win?”

  “Six million… or was it seven,” I say absentmindedly. He chokes on air, I laugh when Amelia goes over and pats his back.

  “Fuck me,” he gasps catching his breath.

  “Fuck me,” Amelia mirrors and I snort laugh, it’s totally unattractive and is what I imagine a pig would do when finding something funny.

  “I’ll give you another fifty dollars when we go to dinner if you never say that again,” I say with a playful stern face. “Now slap daddy’s hand. Tell him not to say those words.”

  “Ok,” she grins and slaps her fathers hand. Her face scrunches up in anger. “Don’t never say dose words again!”

  “Sorry baby,” he grunts and kisses her rosy cheek. “Go play.”

  I text Marie. “I should go, I’ve taken enough of your time. I’m working tomorrow. We’re moving into our new apartment but I’m free the next day. Call me.”

  It’s only a few minutes before Marie pulls up. I turn to Lucas, “If you need anything at all. Please don’t hesitate to call ok?”

  “We don’t take charity,” he grumbles looking annoyed and proud.

  “I’m not saying you do. We could be family and if we’re not I’m now friends with
Amelia. I look after my friends and family,” I give him a pointed look. “Anything at all. Just call.”

  He nods but says nothing as I walk away.

  As soon as I get in the car I call James, “Hey baby.”

  “What’s going on? Where are you?”

  “I’m with Marie. Coming home now.”

  “You didn’t think to let me know? I’ve been worried sick. What if something…” I cut him off with a sigh.

  We argue for about ten minutes, him moaning that he was worried and stuff. He lets it go in the end and allows me to hang up.

  “How’d it go?” Marie asks as soon as I hang up.

  I shake my head, “Awful. He was lovely, the kid was lovely. And they’ve been dealt a very shitty hand. He won’t take money for my rude interruption in his life. Says if he has a brother I’ll be doing him a favor.”

  I tell her everything that was said, and about the birthday cake and how apparently five dollars is a normal amount. She reacted like I did, her face wide with shock. We go through the drive through of McDonald’s and treat ourselves before heading to mine. Marie as usual drops me off and robs my car for the rest of the day.

  James is sat on the couch drinking beer and watching TV when I get in. He pulls me onto his lap and hugs me tight.

  “What did you and Marie get up to?”

  “Just went to Starbucks and McDonald’s and to see if her car is fixed yet,” I lie hoping he doesn’t see right through me.

  He nods seeming satisfied but there’s a glint behind his eyes. A spark of mistrust. “Is it fixed?”

  I shake my head, “Nope, so she’s taken mine.”

  “Ok, you looking forward to the big move tomorrow?”

  I grin and kiss his lips, “So totally excited!”

  “Are we just keeping this place as it is?”

  “Yeah, it can be a guest house. For family out of town or something. I don’t want to part with it.”

  “Yeah, me too,” he smiles and wraps his hands around my boobs. I sag into him and we lay on the couch until we’re both nodding off. As usual he carries me to bed and snuggles up to me, effectively pinning me in his strong arms. “I love you,” are his last words before sleep claims us.