Say Yes to the Cowboy
Page 13
Whenever he did that, she was lost. Rational thought disappeared as elemental need took over. She moaned and clutched his shoulders as the seductive movement of his tongue reminded her of the pleasure waiting for her if she agreed to his plan. When he finally released her, she was breathing hard.
So was he. Backing up a step, he braced his hands on his hips. “Maybe...I should’ve...done that first.”
She held her arms close to her sides so she wouldn’t reach for him. “Maybe.”
“Tess, please say you’ll—”
“I’ll tell Rosie you’re ready to leave.” She wrenched open the door and ducked inside before she committed herself on the basis of one hot kiss. Everyone was still in the kitchen, laughing and talking. “Zeke’s ready to go back!” she called out and dashed for the bathroom to splash cold water on her face.
By the time she felt calm enough to emerge, the house was quiet. She walked into the kitchen, thinking she’d get a cold glass of water from the fridge, and was surprised to see Lexi sitting alone at the table, writing in a spiral notebook.
Lexi glanced up. “Here I am, lying in wait for you.”
“For me? Why?”
“I have this student who’s only seven, and she’s a challenge. Her lesson is today at two and I find myself dreading it. She pretends she knows everything and she knows nothing.”
“Usually that’s a defense mechanism.”
“I thought so, too. Her mother’s just like her. Bring up a subject, any subject, and this woman’s an expert. But how do I deal with it when obviously the daughter’s learning from the mother?”
“I have some ideas. Can I get you a glass of water?”
“Sure. Thanks.”
Tess poured two tall glasses of water and joined Lexi at the table. “First of all, chances are you can’t keep the daughter from imitating her mother, especially at seven. All you can hope for is to make your time with her more productive.”
Lexi nodded. “Agreed.”
“So maybe instead of trying to teach her something she insists she already knows, what if you forget about the riding lesson and ask her to teach you something that she’s good at? Something you need to learn for your job.”
“That would build up her confidence, make her less defensive. Great idea, but what?”
“I’m no expert on horses, so I’m not sure. Brushing the mane and tail? Little girls love to brush hair.”
“They do, but she won’t believe I don’t know how to use a brush. Hang on. I’ve got it. Braiding. She loves to braid. She has a bunch of those bracelets little girls make. She can show me how to braid the horse’s mane and tail. I’ve never been much into that, so it’s believable that I need help.” Lexi laughed. “That’s why I have short hair. Never did learn to fix it all fancy.”
“That’s perfect, then!”
“It is perfect. Thank you, Tess.”
“No guarantees, though. Kids are tricky.”
“But it’s better than what I’ve been doing, which is engaging in a power struggle with this little moppet.” Lexi sipped her water. “So the situation with you and Zeke is none of my damn business, but if you ever need to talk, let me know.”
“Thank you. It’s complicated.”
“The Thunder Mountain guys are complicated. I realize all men are, but the childhood stories of the ones who lived here would curl your hair. That adds another layer of complication. This wedding you’re coming to next month was years in the making.”
“You’ve been engaged that long?”
“We’ve only been engaged since Christmas, but I’ve known him since I was fourteen.”
Tess loved hearing about relationships with a long history. “So you’re best friends?”
“Now we are, but it’s been off and on since high school. He left for five years, worked on a ranch in Colorado, and then sailed back into town thinking I’d fall to my knees in gratitude because he’d finally decided to propose.”
“Where do guys pick up these nutty ideas?”
Lexi shrugged. “Who knows? But obviously they didn’t get the memo that a proposal doesn’t fix everything. Not anymore.”
“At least you know Cade can handle a long-term relationship. Zeke’s never had one and now he’s acting like he wants us to be a family. How can I trust that?”
“Are you asking what I think?”
Tess took a deep breath. “Yes. I’m starting to care for him. He told me about his dad, so I think he’ll do right by Heath, but as for me...”
Lexi gazed at her as if considering her words carefully. “I like Zeke a lot. But if I were you, I’d be careful. Unless he fully commits to you—and you’ll know if that happens—guard your heart.”
Tess reached over and squeezed Lexi’s arm. “Thanks. That’s what I needed to hear.”
Pushing back her chair, Lexi stood. “Just remember that everyone at Thunder Mountain is here for you.”
“I know.” Tess stood, too. “You’ve all been so welcoming. Rosie and Herb made it sound as if I could live here until the baby’s born.”
Lexi smiled. “That’s just how they are—arms open to the world. Even if you and Zeke don’t end up being a family, you still have one here. I realize you have your own parents but—”
“They’re not like this.” She swallowed a lump in her throat. “Nothing like this.”
“Then I’m glad you found us.”
“Me, too.” She gave Lexi a hug. “Me, too.”
Chapter Fifteen
Getting a ride from Rosie made Zeke feel fourteen again, except that his problems weren’t those of a fourteen-year-old. “You were right about Tess,” he said. “She’s not sure if she wants to stay with me.”
“I have a suggestion, if you want to hear it?”
“Yes, ma’am.”
“Take her out to dinner tonight at Scruffy’s. I don’t know if she likes to dance but—”
“She does.” He’d always thought they’d ended up in bed because they’d turned each other on so much slow dancing in the bar where they’d first met. “That’s a great suggestion. Hey, you missed the turn.”
“No, I didn’t.”
“What do you mean? You just passed the road to Matt’s place.”
“I know. I’m taking you to Sheridan Memorial.”
“Rosie, if you’re worried about my shoulder, it’s fine.”
“This isn’t about your shoulder, although, if you want, I can have someone check it out.”
“Not necessary. So why are we going to the hospital?”
“I’m taking you to the maternity ward so you can talk to my friend Joan who’s a nurse there. Maybe you can even get a glimpse of some babies.”
“What for?”
“You’ve worked yourself into a lather about the dangers of childbirth so I plan to give you a dose of reality.”
Zeke sighed. “Rosie, you don’t have to do that.”
“Humor me.”
“You’re wasting your time.”
“I don’t happen to think so. Listen, Zeke, you’ve kept yourself locked down for years and now the thought of this baby is shaking you up. Nothing wrong with that. In fact, it’s probably long overdue. I just don’t want you scaring Tess with your out-of-control imagination.”
He knew better than to argue when Rosie took that tone. “Yes, ma’am.”
Twenty minutes later he walked into the hospital with Rosie, which was like being in a celebrity’s entourage. Everybody knew her, apparently. The maternity ward turned out to be a cheerful place and Rosie’s friend Joan was a skinny, gray-haired lady with a smile that took over her entire face. He couldn’t help but smile back.
“So you’re gonna be a daddy!” Joan said it as if he’d just won the Powerball.
“Yes, ma’am.”
“When Rosie called she said you had some concerns.”
Zeke glanced at Rosie. “You called in advance?”
“Of course. Joan is a busy lady. I wanted to make sure she’d have time to fit us in.”
“Did you tell her I was paranoid?”
Joan’s laugh was even bigger than her smile. “She did. I don’t blame you, Zeke. First-time fathers usually go into this experience knowing very little. The process seems mysterious and intimidating, so it’s easy to focus on a worst-case scenario.” She gave him her bright smile again. “Wish I could show you one of our birthing rooms but they’re all occupied.”
“That’s okay. I really hate to take up your time.”
“Nonsense. I’m more than happy to talk with you. Where’s your list?”
He fished it out of his pocket and handed it to her.
“Let’s take a look.” She moved her finger down the items. “This I’ve never seen. This has only happened once in my twenty years here and mother and baby made it through. This sometimes happens but it’s an easy fix. Never seen this. Not this, either. This one’s very rare and we have lots of advance warning.”
Zeke’s fears eased as she covered the entire list without confirming a single thing as a common issue.
Finally she gave it back. “I’m not saying none of these could ever happen, but the odds are good we won’t encounter any of them.”
“She’s not having the baby here.”
“She wants a home birth?”
“I don’t know, but she lives in Casper, so her doctor’s there.”
“She’ll be fine in Casper. Some excellent people down there. Rosie tells me she’s a smart lady in good health and she’s taking care of herself. I think you can relax, Dad. Now let’s go peek through the glass and look at babies.”
Zeke followed her down the hall to a large window and there they were. Such tiny hands and feet. Their wispy hair reminded him of the feathers on a baby bird. Some slept and others were awake and staring at their surroundings. He could just make out their noises, which sounded like a series of hiccups.
“Cute, huh?” Joan said.
“Amazing.” Zeke stood without moving, mesmerized by the newborns.
“All healthy with strong vital signs. This is the norm. Seven months ago Sophie was in this nursery. A good set of lungs on that one. She stood out because her hair was red right from the get-go.”
“I wish Heath could be born here, too.”
“I’m sure he’ll be fine in Casper. You could go visit their maternity ward. That might help.”
“It will. I’ll do that.” Zeke forced himself to leave the window because Joan must have other things to do besides escort him. If he was fascinated by babies he didn’t know, how would he react when the newborn was his? He had a hunch he’d make a pest of himself so he wouldn’t miss a single thing.
Before he and Rosie left, he thanked Joan and shook her hand. Not surprisingly, she had a firm grip. Then on the way out to the truck he thanked Rosie, who had known what she was doing all along. But then, she usually did.
They rode in silence for a few miles. He’d always been able to do that with Rosie. She respected someone’s silence.
But she did speak up as they neared the turnoff for Matt’s ranch. “Just so you know, I wish she’d have Heath here, too.”
“With Joan on duty.”
Rosie laughed. “Definitely. Anyway, if Tess’s parents lived in Casper, I’d say she needed to stay there, but they don’t and she doesn’t seem very close to them, neither emotionally nor geographically. I’m sure her friends are great, but it’s nice to have family around.”
“I plan to be there.”
“I’m glad to hear it. If she has him in January, the academy will be in full swing. I don’t know if I’ll be able to get away, but I might try.”
“I know she’d like that. She thinks the world of you.”
Rosie smiled. “Does she? That’s nice to know. I’m quite fond of her, too.”
“Rosie, can I ask you something?”
“Anything.”
“I’ve never stuck with a girlfriend for very long. Two weeks might be the most time I’ve spent with one woman. Do you think I’m capable of hanging in there for the duration?”
“That depends. Why were your other relationships so short?”
“I’d get restless and call it quits.”
“Restless or nervous?”
“Nervous about what?”
“That you’d get attached to her and she’d leave or die.”
Her words sucker punched him. He had to catch his breath.
“Sorry, son. I know that was brutal but Tess isn’t just another girlfriend. She’s carrying your child. These are good questions you’re asking and you deserve good answers because the stakes are high.”
He leaned his head against the seat and closed his eyes. “Tell me about it.”
“Do I think you can commit to a woman and love her through thick and thin? Absolutely. I don’t see Tess leaving you, but stuff happens. I can’t guarantee she won’t die.”
“Women die in childbirth.”
“I know, but I seriously doubt Tess is at risk. Can you handle a relationship? It all boils down to whether you can live with the possibility that she’ll be taken from you. Or that the baby will be. We can do our best to keep our loved ones safe, being careful not to smother them in the process. After that, we have to let it go.”
He allowed that to sink in as the tires hummed along the road. “How do you stand it, Rosie?”
“Stand what?”
“You love so many people—Herb, plus all your boys. Then there’s Lexi, Phil and the other wives. The rest of us have started bringing more people for you to love, and now grandchildren are being added to the mix. Anything can happen to anyone. How do you deal with that?”
She pulled up beside Matt’s house. “I accept the risk in exchange for joy.”
As he absorbed her short but powerful answer, he met her gaze. “I don’t know if I’m willing to make that bargain.”
“That’s up to you. But I promise you it’s worth it. Now let’s go in. I want to see the window and I need some Sophie kisses.”
Zeke was glad of that. He could use the time she spent entertaining Sophie to get himself together before taking charge of the little girl. He’d been kidding himself that babysitting while Phil and Damon worked was no big deal. By November he’d be back on the circuit and he’d figured the excitement of the arena would take his mind off Sophie.
That was a big fat lie. He’d miss her like crazy. He could imagine himself scheduling more trips to Thunder Mountain so he could see how she was doing. He’d want to be here for her first birthday.
He hadn’t meant to let her penetrate his defenses but she had. Still, he didn’t love her with the intensity Rosie did. That bond was precious and much stronger than anything he’d formed with the little girl. But when Heath came along...
Rosie had implied he had a choice whether to surrender his heart and soul. But he’d seen those vulnerable little newborns. He wouldn’t have a choice with his son.
So he already had one hostage to fate, as he’d heard it described. He could either try to contain the damage or surrender his heart and soul to his child’s mother, creating two hostages to fate. Every instinct warned him against it.
He’d known guys on the circuit who weren’t with the mothers of their children. They maintained a cordial but distant relationship with the women so they could see their kids. These unattached guys were free to enjoy the charms of any ladies they met as they moved from town to town.
Zeke could probably work the same program. It would be similar to how he used to live and he’d been happy with that routine. So why di
d it seem so depressing now? The thought of hitting on some attractive woman in a bar left him cold.
Yet when he imagined dancing with Tess at Scruffy’s tonight, he perked right up. He hadn’t danced with anybody since that weekend with Tess. It just hadn’t appealed to him.
He grabbed his phone and walked outside so he’d have a little privacy for calling her.
“Hi, Zeke.” She sounded wary.
He understood. He’d left the ball in her court and she might think he was becoming a pest. “Sorry to bother you, but Rosie had a suggestion and I wanted to run it past you.” He’d considered claiming the idea as his own but at the last minute he’d decided attaching Rosie’s name to it might be better.
“All right.”
“There’s a friendly bar in town called Scruffy’s. They serve dinner and they have live music and a dance floor. Would you like to go tonight?”
“I would.” She sounded happy, too. “That’s a great idea. Thank you and thank Rosie. I haven’t been dancing since...well, since Texas.”
“Neither have I. So how about I pick you up at six? And if you’ve decided to stay with me, I can take your suitcase then.”
Dead silence.
“I see that last suggestion went over like a lead balloon.”
“Was that part of Rosie’s idea, that you could scoop up my suitcase at the same time you picked me up for dinner and dancing?”
“No. That was my addition to the plan. So scratch that. I’ll pick you up at six.”
“Or I can meet you at Scruffy’s.”
Just like that, the wheels were coming off his romantic evening. But he’d take what he could get. “If you want to. Although I feel obliged to point out that meeting a date at the venue is not the cowboy way.”
“I get that, Zeke. As I’ve said before, you have beautiful manners. But I’m not sure yet whether moving my things over there is the right thing to do. Plus, not having my car would feel claustrophobic.”
Looking at it from her perspective, he could see why. “That’s fair. I don’t like being stuck without transportation, either.”
“I’ll follow you back in any case. I know myself. After dancing with you I’ll be ready to follow you anywhere.”