That was a huge mental shift for him and, even through her heartbreak, she perceived that. But she felt like screaming at him. She didn’t, though, because he wouldn’t understand why she was so upset.
He didn’t realize that a marriage of convenience without love, which was basically what he was suggesting, would slowly kill her spirit. That certainly wouldn’t be a healthy atmosphere for little Heath. She couldn’t explain any of that to Zeke. It wasn’t his fault that he wasn’t capable of giving her the love she needed or accepting the love she had to give.
She drew in a shaky breath. “I’m not going to marry you.”
“Why not?” He looked confused. “We get along great. I know you enjoy the sex and I sure as hell do. Moving over here would be a pain, but in the long run it would be so much better for us, for Heath and even for my family.”
She noticed he wasn’t inserting the word foster in front of family anymore, either. He was changing, opening up. Rosie and Herb might eventually become Mom and Dad. He was doing it for the baby, just as he was determined to marry her for the sake of the baby.
She looked into his eyes. “I’m sorry, Zeke. More sorry than you know. But marrying you wouldn’t work for me.” She pushed back her chair. “I need to get going.”
“Going? Where?”
“Back to Casper.”
“Tonight? Are you crazy?”
She shook her head. “On the contrary. I’ve never felt more sane.”
Chapter Nineteen
Zeke followed Tess into the living room where she began gathering up her clothes. He couldn’t take back what he’d said because he believed it was the right course of action. But he was willing to compromise. “Let’s forget about getting married.”
“Never considered it in the first place.” She grabbed the last of her clothes and headed to the bedroom.
“Will you at least think about moving here?”
“No, I won’t.” She walked into the bedroom and shut the door on him.
“Tess!” He had his hand on the doorknob when he heard the lock click into place. “Oh, for God’s sake. You don’t have to lock me out. What do you imagine I’ll do?”
“Nothing.” Her voice was muffled. “I just don’t want you watching me get dressed.”
“What? I’ve seen every beautiful inch of you, touched every inch, kissed every—”
“Shut up, Zeke.”
“And you liked it when I did!” His frustration grew. “If you moved here, you could stay with me until you found a place. We could be together. I could give you back rubs. I read in the book that backaches are common, especially in the later months when the baby’s heavier. I could—”
“No.” The door opened and she came out fully dressed. “That wouldn’t work for me.” She moved past him and down the hall to the living room.
“I don’t get it.” He trailed after her. “I don’t understand why you’d rather stay in Casper by yourself when we could be enjoying each other over here.”
“I know you don’t.” She picked up her purse and turned to gaze at him. Pain turned her blue eyes gray but her jaw was tight with resolution.
“Explain it to me.”
“Can’t.”
“This makes no sense!”
“But it’s what I have to do. I’ve been debating how to handle our physical relationship as we go forward. Obviously we’ll be seeing each other whenever you interact with Heath.”
His heart began to pound. He had a premonition he would hate what she was about to say.
“But we won’t be having sex anymore, Zeke.”
He felt as if he’d been gutted. He had trouble getting his breath. “Why?”
“It’s how it has to be. I’ll ask you to please respect that. I’ll be in touch.” She turned and opened the front door.
“Wait!” He almost grabbed her arm but at the last minute stopped himself.
She glanced over her shoulder. “Why?”
“It’s still raining. I don’t trust that road.”
“I noticed somebody dumped gravel in the bad spot. It should be fine.”
“Or not. You could get stuck.” He picked up his keys from the floor where he’d dropped them so they could race to the bedroom. That moment seemed years ago. “I’ll follow you at least that far.”
“Up to you.” She started out the door.
“Hang on. I think there’s an umbrella around here somewhere. Let me go find it so you won’t get soaked.”
“No, thank you.” And she walked out on the porch.
Muttering several choice words, he stepped outside and turned to lock the front door. By the time he was down the steps she’d already disappeared around the side of the house. Cold rain hit his bare arms and shoulders as he clutched his keys and followed her. A car door slammed and the engine started.
He jogged to his truck and climbed in as she backed out, going fast. He yelled at her to slow down but doubted she heard him. He reversed the truck and went after her.
Now that he thought about the gravel he’d had put down this afternoon, he wished he hadn’t done it. He’d meant to smooth her way in. Instead he’d made it easier for her to leave.
Clearly he’d spooked her with his suggestion, but what was he supposed to do, just let her go ahead and set up her business in Casper? Then she’d be really entrenched. He could see why she wouldn’t want to go through the trouble of selling one place and buying another, but he wanted her out of that house.
He hadn’t been straight with her about why, either, for fear he’d look like a jealous bastard. She’d shared the place with Jared, the creep who’d rejected her because she couldn’t have a baby. She didn’t belong in that house with whatever memories lingered there. She needed to start over. With him.
The possibility of that was fading as fast as the glow of her taillights through the rain. He had to step on it to keep up with her. She really should slow down.
She did put on the brakes as she approached the gravel section. If she got stuck he’d pull her out, and maybe that would give her time to reconsider leaving. He had to believe if they talked it out, if he could just hold her, this awful situation would improve.
But she drove through the gravel with no problem and continued down the road. He had no more reason to follow her except...she really was going too fast. Knowing she was so eager to get away from him cut like a knife.
Maybe once she’d driven for a while she’d settle down and reduce her speed. She wouldn’t like it, but he’d follow her a little longer. He hoped he wouldn’t push her to go faster.
But, damn it, the blacktop got slick as glass at times like this. She’d admitted that she wasn’t used to the country. She lived in town, worked in town, probably didn’t get out on the open road except to visit her folks in Laramie. He doubted she’d ever driven through a rainstorm at night.
Because he sat up higher than her sedan, he had a good view of the stretch of highway going past his turnoff. It was deserted. She braked the car again at the end of his road.
He wished she’d turn left, head back toward Thunder Mountain and spend the night there. If she did, he’d swing around and go back to Matt’s. She’d be safe with Rosie and Herb.
Instead she turned right, toward the interstate. She sent up a spray of mud as she pulled onto the blacktop. He figured the mud had been aimed at him.
He wasn’t close enough to get hit with it, but the gesture had been symbolic. She was done with him, completely done, and damned if he could figure out why. Her reaction to what he considered a reasonable suggestion was out of proportion.
That worried him more than anything. She’d pretended to be in control when she’d put on her clothes and left the house, but now that he thought about it, she’d been trembling. Her sudden decision to light out of the
re had thrown him for a loop and he hadn’t paid as much attention as he should have.
Cautious behavior was her normal setting, but she wasn’t being cautious tonight. As he kept up with her, he checked his speedometer. Holy moly. His truck was heavy enough that it wouldn’t easily hydroplane, but her little sedan was—oh, God!
He jammed on the brakes and yelled as her car skidded off the road. His truck went into a spin, throwing him against the seat belt and coming to rest on the opposite shoulder. Leaping out, he ran across the empty two-lane highway.
Her car sat in a gully running thigh-deep with rain. His heartbeat was so loud he could barely hear the dark water churning past, but he could see it. His first instinct was to go down there, but he’d been in hard-rushing water before. He’d be no help to her if he got knocked off his feet first thing, and he would be.
He thought of the ropes in his truck. If he drove the truck over here, he could tie himself to the truck and work his way to her. Then she rolled down her window and he nearly passed out from relief. She hadn’t been knocked unconscious by the impact...or worse.
He made a megaphone of his hands. “Are you okay?”
“Yes!” Her voice cracked a little but she didn’t sound dazed. Scared, though. Real scared.
He decided on a different, quicker plan. “I’ll get my rope!” He ran back across the highway. If a vehicle had come by, he’d have flagged it down, but it was late and nobody was out in this weather.
In his haste, he’d left his phone at home. Besides, by the time either of them called for help, he could have her out of there. He wasn’t about to leave her sitting in that car any longer than necessary. The water could rise. A flash flood could come along.
A coil of rope over his shoulder and a pair of gloves in his back pocket, he dashed back to peer down at Tess. She faced him, her hands clutching the car door. He figured she was on her knees on the seat.
His vision narrowed until she was the only one in the frame. Tess. His Tess. He wouldn’t let anything happen to her. Not as long as he had breath in his body. She was his joy.
The rain had let up a little so he didn’t have to shout as loud. “I need you to climb out and straddle the window. Then I’ll toss you this rope and you’re going to tighten it around your ribs and ease into the water. Then I’ll pull you up the bank. Got it?”
She nodded. Her face was white as she gazed at him. She took a deep breath and hoisted herself out the window.
“Hold up one arm. I’ll aim for that.” He’d never roped in the rain, but he figured if he threw fast and hard, that would help. He built the loop. He’d done it millions of times, but this was the one that mattered. “Coming at you.”
The rope seemed to sail out in slow motion and he stopped breathing as he watched it rise up and settle down...right over her upheld arm. He sucked in a lungful of air and reached for the gloves in his back pocket. “Okay. Now secure it under your arms and tighten it real good.”
She followed his instructions, although her movements were jerky and once she wobbled as if she might fall.
He broke out in a cold sweat. “Grip the door with your legs as if you’re riding a horse.”
She nodded. After what seemed like forever, she had the rope fastened under her arms. “Now what?”
“Bring your other leg out and slide down with your back to me so you can hold on to the car as long as possible. Then you’ll have to let go and grab the rope as you turn around. I’ll keep it taut and gradually pull you out of the water and up the bank. I’ll go slow so I don’t jerk you off your feet.”
“Zeke, what about your shoulder?”
“Lady, I don’t give a damn about my shoulder. Ready?”
“Ready.”
He forced himself to breathe while she eased into the water. Before she turned around, he braced himself with both gloved hands on the rope. The rain had nearly stopped but the rope was still wet.
She stumbled once and he gasped. Then she got both hands on the rope and leaned back to snug up the line.
“Good! That’s great. Just start walking as I pull you forward.” He started the hand-over-hand motion in time with her steps and felt as if someone had jabbed a red-hot poker into his shoulder. Yep, he’d reinjured it. Oh, well.
He locked his gaze with hers and ignored the pain in his shoulder. “That’s it. We’re getting close. Watch out. Really slippery right there. Easy does it. Atta girl. A little more...little more...gotcha!” He pulled her into his arms and buried his face in her wet hair.
She clung to him and shook. “I thought...I might...die.”
He hugged her tighter. “Not on my watch.”
“Thank you, Zeke.”
“You’re welcome. Now, come on. Let’s get you over to my truck.” Moments later he sat in the passenger seat with Tess in his lap wrapped in a blanket he kept in the back of his cab. He’d turned the engine on and had the heat on low. He’d figure out what to do in a minute, but first he needed to just hold her.
She sighed and nestled against him. “Oh, Zeke, if you hadn’t been here...”
“But I was. I had to be. I couldn’t let anything happen to you.”
“Or the baby.”
That stunned him. “My God. I forgot all about the baby.”
She lifted her head. The dim light from the dash revealed that her eyes were wide with surprise. “You forgot about the baby?”
“I know. Terrible, right? Probably wipes out all the points I’ve made so far regarding this kid.”
“I didn’t say that.”
“No, but you could be thinking it.” He sighed. “Tess, I can’t deny it. When I saw you trapped in the car, I didn’t think of anything but getting you to safety. I forgot you were pregnant. I forgot you hated my guts. Nothing mattered but saving you.”
“I see.” For some odd reason she was smiling.
That beautiful smile loosened his tongue some more. “You’re my joy, Tess. The baby’s wonderful, but when it comes right down to it, you’re the one I...” He finally had to quit talking because his throat was becoming clogged.
Her voice was as soft as a caress. “The one you what, Zeke?”
He looked into eyes warm with happiness and shiny with tears. The words that had been lodged in his throat popped out. “I love you.”
She burst into tears, but since she was hugging him like she’d never let him go, he thought her tears might not be a bad thing.
“Oh, Zeke,” she wailed, her face pressed against his bare shoulder, the good one, fortunately. “I thought I’d never hear you say that.”
He was shocked that he had. But those three words felt more right than any he’d ever spoken. He held her close and combed her wet hair with his fingers. “I’m not exactly used to saying it, to be honest. Matter of fact, I’ve never said that to another lady, not even Rosie.”
Her words were thick with tears. “I had a hunch.”
“But I can see now that it’s the only thing that fits the situation. I love you. And if you have to live in Casper, okay, but please sell the house you used to live in with your ex.”
She sniffed and looked up at him, her face damp from crying. “That bothers you?”
“Yes, ma’am.”
“You know what? That house has never felt right to me but I hung on to it like a trophy and it really is perfect for a day care.”
“But not the only one in the world, I’ll bet.”
“Definitely not. On the market it goes and, if I’m selling it, I might as well move to Sheridan.”
He smiled with relief. “Thank you, sweet lady. You’ll make lots of people happy with that decision, me included. Rosie and Herb will—” He caught himself. “Mom and Dad will love hearing it.”
“I’m sure they will.” The happy glow in her eyes told him that she rea
lized what his slight correction meant.
Everything was going so well that he shouldn’t push his luck, but then again, maybe this was the time to get it all out in the open. “As long as we’re clearing the air, there’s one more issue.”
“Let me guess. You want us to get married.”
“Yes, I surely do. I know it’s a touchy subject but I need to give you fair warning. I’ll probably keep asking even if it makes you mad.”
“You could try asking me again right now.”
“Yeah?”
She nodded.
His pulse rate kicked up a notch. “Well, then. Tess, will you marry me?”
“Yes.”
“You will?” He could barely believe it. “Why?”
“Because I love you so much and finally, finally, I know that you love me back. If I had to end up in a ditch full of raging water before you could say it, then it was worth every terrifying second. I’d do it all again.”
“Oh, God, don’t say that.” He cupped her cheek in one hand. “I hope I never go through another experience like that one.”
She wrapped her arms around his neck and held his gaze. “I hate to break it to you, but loving someone means you probably will.”
He sighed. “Then I hope it’s a very long time before I go through such a moment again.”
“I can’t even promise you that much. Want to reconsider?”
“Not a chance.” As he kissed her, he understood the full meaning of what his mom had told him. Exchanging risk for joy created a path to love. Because of Tess, he was the lucky guy who’d travel that path for the rest of his life.
Epilogue
The early morning flight from Auckland to LAX took eleven hours, so Austin Teague had booked an aisle seat to accommodate his six-foot, three-inch frame. He’d also managed to snag a spot in the two-seat section that ran along each side of the jumbo jet. Although he was still in economy, having only one other person sharing his space made it feel almost like business class.
He’d arrived first and, not long after, a pleasant-faced woman who looked to be in her sixties stopped in the aisle beside his seat. Her blond hair and rounded figure reminded him of his foster mom.
Say Yes to the Cowboy Page 17
