Awakenings - SF1

by Meagher, Susan X

  "Oh Ryan," she cried as she slumped against her friend's strong chest, sobbing once again, "you scared me," she finally said.

  "How did I scare you?" she murmured as she wrapped Jamie in her arms and began to slowly rock her.

  "I thought you were treating me like they were. Like I'm too stupid to make up my own mind about what I do and who I see," she said as she continued to cry softly.

  "I will never do that to you, Jamie," she replied solemnly as she stroked her hair. "Never! I see you as a mature woman who is very competent to make her own life decisions."

  "I know one thing for sure, Ryan," she said with determination through her tears. "If Jack Townsend thinks he can control me, he's in for a very nasty surprise."

  After Jamie had composed herself Ryan went into the kitchen to make dinner. "We've got turkey and some mashed potatoes left over from yesterday," she called into the living room. "Is that okay?"

  "That sounds great," Jamie agreed. She sat on the loveseat with Duffy and when Ryan came back a while later, Duffy immediately jumped off and took his place on the floor.

  Ryan ate in her normal hearty manner, but Jamie just picked at her plate. "I know I'm not a great cook, but it's not that bad is it?" she asked as Jamie moved the same piece of turkey around on her plate.

  "No, it's delicious, really," Jamie said as she popped the piece in her mouth. "I just get an upset stomach when I'm tense. I'm always afraid I'll throw up so I don't like to eat much."

  "You don't feel like you did at the help line do you?" Ryan asked cautiously.

  "No, I don't feel faint. I'm just a little nauseous."

  "I guarantee that you won't throw up," she said confidently. "Would you humor me and eat just a little? I bet you haven't had much today, have you?"

  "No, not really."

  "And you didn't eat much yesterday either, did you?" she said knowingly.

  "No," she admitted as she looked down at the floor.

  "Come on then," Ryan said as she took her fork and loaded it up. "Here comes the airplane into the hangar," she teased as she did a few loop-the-loops with the turkey laden fork.

  Jamie gave her a shy grin as she opened up and accepted the turkey. It really did taste a lot better now that Ryan was urging her on. They continued their little game until the plate was clean. "Good girl!" Ryan enthused as she rubbed her head, messing her blonde locks haphazardly. "Now you can have some cake for dessert!"

  After they had cleaned the kitchen they went down to Ryan's room to study. Ryan sat at her desk and wrestled with some problems that looked so complex that Jamie was unable to tell what subject they covered. She sat on the big bed and read her book until she fell asleep sitting up.

  When Ryan noticed that she was sound asleep she walked over to the bed and woke her with a light touch on her cheek. Jamie slowly batted her eyes and Ryan felt a catch in her throat at how terribly beautiful and completely vulnerable she looked. Damn you, Jack, she thought. How can you not realize what you have here? She trusts you but you kick her again and again! Your stupid insecurities are ruining your relationship, you jerk!

  "I think you'd be more comfortable in Da's room. Then you'll have your own bath." She stood and pulled Jamie up with her. "I'll go change the sheets and get it ready for you. And you go get ready for bed," she said as she gave her a little push towards the bathroom.

  Ryan brought her a new toothbrush and showed her where the towels were. "You like to wear a t-shirt to bed, right?" Jamie nodded her assent as she brushed her teeth. Ryan trotted over with two tshirts, "You can have long or short sleeved."

  "I think I'll take the long," she replied thoughtfully as she removed the garment from Ryan's hand. "Is it okay if I just wear the shirt and the boxers I bought? I don't want to scandalize Conor when he comes home."

  "I'm sure Conor will think you're seriously overdressed," she said with a smirk. "But I think it sounds appropriately modest. Do you need anything else?" Ryan inquired.

  "No, I'm fine."

  Ryan left her to change the sheets and a few minutes later Jamie walked into the room in her sleep clothes. "I'm just gonna hop in bed and try to forget about this whole day."

  "I think that is a great idea," Ryan agreed as she pulled the crisp sheet back for her. "I'll be up for a while doing some homework. Just yell downstairs if you think of anything you need." When Jamie was situated Ryan pulled the sheet up and tucked her in. She sat on the edge of the bed and leaned over to plant a kiss on Jamie's cheek. "You sleep tight tonight."

  "I'll try," she agreed. "Thanks for being there for me Ryan," she said as she looked up into those deep blue eyes.

  "I'm always here for you, Jamie. I'm really glad you called me today," she replied as she ruffled her hair.

  Around 10 o'clock Ryan heard Jamie get up. She listened for a minute and decided that she must just be going to the bathroom. After a moment she returned to her chemistry problem. She was sitting at her desk wearing her standard study outfit--her underwear. Her hair was pulled straight back into a tight ponytail with just a wisp or two sneaking out of the band and dangling around her face. Small, round silver wire rimmed glasses wrapped around her ears, giving her a very serious, almost professorial look that even the underwear didn't diminish.

  She was slightly startled when she heard Jamie's soft voice right behind her. "Ryan?" she said softly.

  "Hi, what's up?" she replied as she turned around in her chair. "Having trouble sleeping?"

  "Yeah, I guess I am," she said as she looked down at the floor.

  "Tell me what's wrong, Jamie," Ryan said as she stood and faced her friend.

  You mean besides the fact that you're in your underwear? "I woke up a while ago, and I can't get back to sleep," she admitted, still looking down at the floor. "I saw your

  light on so I came down." The floor was still holding her interest. "But I don't want to disturb you. I mean you're in your... pajamas and all," she said to the carpet.

  "You're not disturbing me, Jamie. I was just studying a little." She lifted Jamie's head up to look her in the eyes, "I'm planning on being up for another couple of hours. Would you like to stay down here with me?"

  "I don't want to invade your privacy," she said as she shot an awkward glance at Ryan's outfit.

  "Does it bother you that I'm in my underwear?" she finally caught on.

  "Um, that's underwear?" she asked sheepishly.

  "Yeah," she said a little defensively. "Haven't you ever seen these?" Jamie studied her outfit closely. Ryan was wearing a gray ribbed tank top that fit like second skin. The tank top just covered the waistband of matching cotton knit gray boxers. Boxers?

  "These are regulation women's underwear I'll have you know. I don't borrow my brothers' or anything," she teased as she made her way over to her built in dresser. "When I started working out at the gym I began to wear Lycra shorts. I really liked them and got used to not having elastic around my upper legs. I found these Calvin Klein women's boxers a short time later and I never plan on going back. They never ride up and you don't get the dreaded VPL."

  "VPL?" Jamie asked.

  "Visible panty line, of course. It's the scourge of womankind," she laughed as she pulled a pair of navy blue sweat pants out of a drawer and slipped them on. Next she found the T-shirt she had been wearing earlier and pulled that over her head.

  "You don't have to get dressed just because of me," Jamie said weakly.

  "It's okay, Jamie. I want you to feel comfortable around me," she said as she gave her a reassuring pat. "Now, what would you like to do? Do you feel like talking, or do you want to lie down while I study?"

  "I think I'll just lie down here if you don't mind," she replied as she flopped down on the bed. "I'm really tired, but I just can't relax."

  "Why don't you let me help you relax?" Ryan said as she sat down next to her. She opened a bedside drawer and pulled out a bottle of herbal scented massage lotion that she held up invitingly in front of Jamie. "Can I tempt you?"

  Jamie
flopped over onto her stomach with her arms stretched straight out at her sides. "If you must," she said with mock resignation.

  "Do you mind taking this off?" Ryan asked as she tugged on the hem of the oversized T-shirt.

  Jamie felt just a touch of embarrassment as she sat up slightly and pulled the shirt over her head. She dropped it right above her head and lay back down immediately.

  Ryan swung her legs up on the bed and scooted over until she was right next to Jamie. She swung one knee over and straddled her slim hips. Thank you Jesus, for making her put on sweats.

  Ryan poured a generous amount of lotion onto her hands and then rubbed them together briskly to warm it. She placed those strong hands gently on Jamie's shoulders and softly asked, "Ready?"

  For anything, Jamie thought dreamily as she struggled to stay lucid. Ryan's hands were works of art as they worked over her tense muscles. There's no way those hands have ever forced a woman to do anything against her will, she decided. Although who would be crazy enough to refuse this touch is beyond me, she thought dreamily. They pushed and pulled and prodded each muscle in turn until Jamie was a quivering mass of relaxed flesh. Jamie could feel Ryan's powerful thighs flex and move against her as her friend leaned over to reach more distant muscles. She could feel the heat radiating from Ryan's body through hers as the massage grew more strenuous.

  After a few minutes of very deep muscle work Jamie felt the intensity begin to wane. She felt her body grow heavy and sluggish and as Ryan continued to work she felt herself struggle to remain awake. Ryan obviously felt this too, as she continued to stroke her lightly, finally ending with a feather light touch all over her neck, shoulders and back.

  Jamie was vaguely aware of Ryan's efforts to place her t-shirt over her head again and pull her arms through the long sleeves. She felt a soft blanket settle over her and then a tender kiss on her cheek. She allowed herself to take in the peaceful feeling and she quickly drifted off to sleep.

  When Ryan was certain that Jamie was asleep she got up from the bed gingerly and returned to her desk. I cannot study with clothes on, she decided as she shucked her pants and T-shirt and settled down with her chemistry problems.

  After another 2 hours of struggling with her studies Ryan heard Conor come home. She checked on Jamie to be sure she was warm, turned off her computer and put her pants back on. She climbed the stairs and greeted Conor just as he was about to go up to his room.

  "Hey," he said when he spied her emerge from the staircase. "What are you still doing up?"

  "I've been studying," she said through a yawn. "Oh, Jamie's downstairs. She had some boyfriend trouble. She's going to sleep in my room. I'll take Da's," she said as she fought another yawn.

  "Is she okay?" he asked with true concern.

  "I think she'll be fine. She just had a really tough day."

  "What do you think of this boyfriend, anyway?" Conor asked, a bit too casually.

  "I don't know him very well," she replied. "He doesn't care for me much. That's part of the problem," she said simply.

  "Why wouldn't he like you?" Conor asked with a sharp tone.

  "He doesn't think Jamie should spend so much of her time with a lesbian," she replied, just a bit embarrassed.

  "Oh please!" Conor said, truly agitated. "What does he think you'll do to her? I'd like to give that jerk a piece of my mind," he added as an afterthought.

  "All I can guess is that he thinks I'll seduce her," she replied.

  "Riiight" he said knowingly. "What Mr. Preppy doesn't get is that if you wanted to seduce her she would already be seduced," he said as he wrapped his elbow around her neck and gave her a gentle tap on the chin with his fist. "No woman is safe when my baby sister sets her trap," he teased.

  "That's the stupid thing, Conor. I don't feel that way about Jamie. She's my friend and it infuriates me that he can't recognize that. Plus it's a terrible insult to her. She's totally faithful to him and to assume she would have sex with me is just rude."

  "You really don't have any romantic feelings about her?" Conor asked. "You could do a lot worse you know," he said a little defensively.

  "No, I don't have those kind of thoughts about her. I feel very close to her, and kind of protective, but not romantic," she shrugged a bit. "If she was single and interested I'm sure that would change, though," she added with a little leer. "She is quite a catch."

  "We are in complete agreement, little sister," he said as he placed an arm around her shoulders and escorted her to their father's room.

  Jamie woke with a start as she felt a wet nose and a warm tongue nuzzle her face. She blinked her eyes open and saw a smiling Ryan and a panting Duffy watching her. Ryan was obviously just back from a morning workout. She wore a gold turtleneck covered by a navy blue short sleeved t-shirt. Her legs were covered by black Lycra pants. Black and electric blue roller blades covered her feet. Her hair was styled in a loose braid and the few wispy bangs she normally wore were covered in perspiration. Her cheeks were very pink and her blue eyes were bright and mischievous.

  "Duffy insisted on seeing you this morning, and I just could not refuse," she said as she shrugged her shoulders helplessly.

  "Can he get on the bed?" she asked.

  "If you don't mind, I don't mind," was the reply.

  "C'mon Duffy, boy," Jamie said as she patted the mattress. Duffy did not need to be asked twice. He jumped up and began to lick every exposed inch of skin that was available to his bubblegum pink tongue. Jamie giggled helplessly as she tried to protect her mouth and eyes from the assault.

  "I'm going to jump in the shower while you two cuddle," Ryan said as she stripped off her skates. She stopped at the dresser and chose clean underwear, a T-shirt and a pair of jeans which she took into the bathroom with her.

  Jamie heard the shower start up and after a minute Duffy calmed down and nestled up alongside her. After a few moments spent idly rubbing his head she heard a light knock on the door. "Come in," she called out.

  Conor's dark head poked in the door. "Are you ladies decent?" he asked.

  "Ryan's in the shower, but I'm pretty decent," she answered with a grin.

  He entered the room and shook his finger at Duffy. "Why do you always get to sleep with the pretty girls?" he said as he sat on the edge of the bed and ruffled his coat.

  Jamie looked Conor over as he played with the dog. He was dressed in a bright white T-shirt covered by a deep red and black flannel shirt. The sleeves were rolled up to expose his very muscular forearms that were surprisingly covered with very light blonde down. Faded jeans and heavy work boots completed his outfit. His hair was still damp from the shower and he smelled great. He smells just the way I like a man to smell, she thought as she sniffed reflectively, nothing but soap.

  "Ryan says you had a tough day yesterday" he said after a bit. "Are you feeling better?"

  "Yeah, I am. Thanks for caring about me, Conor," she said shyly.

  "You've been adopted by the whole clan, Jamie. We all care about you," he said as he stood to go. "If that ex-con gives you any more trouble, he's gonna have to answer to me," he said with a mock glower.

  "I'll keep that in mind," she said with a grin. "Boy, would that ever be an unfair fight. I wasn't sure he could beat up Ryan," she admitted. "He wouldn't last a second with you."

  "That's where you're wrong, Jamie. Ryan's the one you need to be careful of in this family." Jamie was just about to ask what he meant by that when the door to the bathroom opened and Ryan called out, "Quit harassing the half naked women, Conor."

  "Now you tell me she's half naked," he whined. "I never have any luck," he said as he gave Jamie a little wave and left the room.

  "He's the sweetest man," Jamie said in wonder as she walked over to the bathroom.

  "No, Brendan is the sweetest man. Conor is the most charming man," she said with a knowing smile.

  "Well, I think he's sweet and charming," she said as she folded her arms in a defiant stance.

  "No, that's me," Ryan sa
id with a twinkle as she stepped out of the steamy room. Her hair was very damp and combed straight back off her face. Every strong plane of that face was emphasized by the style and Jamie realized again how incredibly beautiful her friend was.

  "I can't argue with that," she said fondly as she surprised Ryan with a very fierce hug. "I'm feeling a lot better today," she supplied. "I think a marvelous massage had a lot to do with it though."

  "I'm only too happy to oblige. I don't give a lot of massages anymore, and I kind of miss it," she admitted.

  "I will gratefully accept any time you feel the need. Remember, I am a certified pleasure hound," she grinned as she stepped into the warm room.

  The trip to Berkeley was quick even in the heavy traffic. Jamie loved the freedom of being able to sail along between the slow moving lanes on the big bike. They were even allowed to use the express lane on the bridge which saved 15 minutes. As they approached Jamie's house Ryan slowed down and pulled to the curb. "Do you want me to let you off here in case your roommates are home?"

  Jamie thought for a minute and finally nodded her head. "No sense in making matters worse than they already are," she said sadly. She hopped off and handed Ryan the helmet. Then she leaned over and gave her a big hug and a kiss on the cheek. "This meant an awful lot to me Ryan. I just want you to know how thankful I am that you're my friend."

  Ryan blushed just a little and returned the hug. "It's my pleasure," she said sincerely.

  There were 10 messages from Jack, 2 from her father and 1 from Mia when she checked the answering machine in the empty house. She had turned off her cell phone the day before to avoid being harassed, and this was the obvious result. She dialed her father's office and left a message on his private line. "Hi, Daddy. Don't worry about me. I'm sure this will all blow over. Sorry about yesterday. I'll call later."