by Mary Calmes
I shivered. "You know I love you, right?"
"Yes, J, I know."
I took in a deep breath and closed my eyes.
"I love you, Jory."
I could have died happy right then and there.
* * * *
We decided that, since we were at his place, he would pack a bag and we would drive to my apartment and he would leave from there in the morning. He had offered to just throw me over his back and carry me, but I was determined to get the crutches he had loaned me to work. They were slightly too big even though he had shortened them to the smallest they could go, but he assured me they were workable. So I was making my way to my building with him beside me, yawning dramatically.
"Could you stop that?" I groused at him.
"What?" he teased me.
I tried to scowl but he looked so good with the smile in his eyes, the way his lip curled up in the corner, the day-old stubble, and his hair sticking up in places. He was rumpled and tousled from being in bed with me, having proven to me that he could be careful when he made love to me. He had wrapped my legs around his waist and supported my weight in his lap without once touching my ankle. I had insisted that we consummate our back-together status, over his objections.
"I don't wanna hurt you," he said when I had slid down so my head was in his lap.
"You won't," I said, reaching up to touch his face, my fingers sliding over his jaw. "But I gotta have you."
"Oh yeah?"
"Please."
"Okay, baby," he said, his voice low and husky.
I let him ease me out of his lap and watched as he unwrapped my ankle, releasing me from the machine. He had an Ace bandage and he was methodical when he put it on, checking to make sure it wasn't too tight, massaging the cramp from my other calf, working his strong hands up both legs to my thighs. When I lifted up off the couch, my back bowed for him, he picked me up and carried me to his bed. I was pinned under him and when he kissed me, I moaned loudly.
"I wore a condom with Maggie, J, I swear I did."
I smiled up into the eyes now dark with passion. "And so what?"
"I went and got tested after and I know it doesn't show up that fast but I'm clean and—"
"And so what?" I repeated. "You just want me to let you—"
"Yes—please... let me."
I stared up into his eyes and I saw his jaw clenching, heard the shaky breath, saw the hard swallow.
"Baby, I swear I—"
"I don't trust anyone like I trust you, Sam."
The look on his face that I had never seen before, the look of love—surrender and aching and happiness all at the same time—I was so pleased with him, with the man I would spend the rest of my life with.
"I'm gonna be so gentle, baby."
"Don't be that gentle," I teased him.
And the kiss I got curled my toes, it went through me so fast and so hard, racing heat that made me cry out.
"The sounds you make when you're happy," he growled against my mouth. "You kill me."
I was burned up with my desire for him and him for me.
Impossible to deny the connection between us, as tangible as it was. His skin on mine was scorching.
"Hello."
My head snapped up and I realized I had been daydreaming.
"I'm gonna grab you if you don't hurry the fuck up," he threatened me, his brows furrowing. "It's freezing out here, J."
I tried not to smile as I hobbled passed him.
"I hope you have something to eat up there, because I'm starving."
"I don't, actually. Why don't you run and get some Cuban food and meet me upstairs. Gimme the bag."
He snorted out a laugh. "Yeah right, like you can use crutches and carry a bag. I'll meet you up there. Whaddya want?"
"Just rice and some chicken is good."
"Okay," he said, leaning forward, kissing my forehead before he left.
At the stairs I realized that Sam carrying me was probably the best-case scenario. It looked like Everest instead of the two flights that it was. I was resting at the top of the first flight when I heard Sam whistling behind me.
"Need help yet?"
"Screw you, Kage."
He walked around in front of me, dropped his shoulder, and threw me over his back.
"Sam!" I complained as he did what he always did and slapped my ass hard. "Put me down. The blood is rushing to—"
"Nope," he cut me off, bouncing me on his shoulder to prove his dominance, carrying me and my crutches up the next flight of stairs. When he deposited me in front of my door, I immediately reached up and wrapped my arms around his neck to draw him down to me.
He deepened the kiss, having his way with me, completely in control. I knew he loved that I was submissive, intoxicated with wielding his power over me. It was the role he understood and why we fit together so well. The essential makeup of the man I was not asking to change. He was the dominant partner, the alpha male; I was his mate, simple as that.
"What're you thinking about?"
"Where's my food?" I teased him, hugging him tight.
He clutched me close, one hand in my hair, holding me against him, the other running up and down my back. The contented sigh was long, like he could finally breathe.
"The place is closed on Sundays. We'll have to scrounge up some food. I'll cook you something."
I grunted and he pinched my ass.
"Open the door."
When the door swung open it took me a minute to realize what I was looking at. I had only ever seen an apartment ransacked in movies. I never imagined what it would look like in real life.
"Oh shit," Sam breathed out and his gun was in his hand before I was even aware that he was carrying one. "Stay here while I check the rest of it, J."
"No, just—" I reached for him but he slipped into the dark apartment and down the short hall to my bedroom. I leaned inside and flipped on the lights, illuminating the living room and kitchen as he came out, replacing the gun in the holster under his leather jacket. Funny that it had taken him only seconds to check the entire apartment; there was no getting around the fact that it was tiny.
"It's all clear," he told me. "Whoever was here is long gone."
I nodded, shivering hard.
He wrapped me up in his arms and pressed me against his big, hard body. "It's okay, baby, you just won't be staying here. Let's get your stuff packed up, okay?"
"No, Sam, I can't just let somebody scare me out of my—"
"Yes, you can," he said, tipping my chin up so he could look down into my eyes. "I won't allow you to be here. It's not an option. Besides, I would've been moving you in tomorrow anyway. I don't plan to sleep without you, ever."
"But, Sam, it's too soon. We need time to—"
"No, we don't, J. You aren't gettin' any time, so do whatever you hafta do in your head 'cause you live with me starting now."
"But—"
"I'm gonna pack up your shit then I'm gonna call it in. Sit down while I do that."
"Sam—"
"There," he pointed at the loveseat. "Sit down and look pretty."
"Sam—"
"It's a furnished apartment, J. What do you even have here that you'd need to move?"
"That's not the point. I—"
"I can put you in the seat if you'd prefer."
I went and sat down as he walked back to my bedroom.
"Lucky you picked me up at the pier, huh?" I asked the empty room, raising my voice so he could hear me. "What if I'd been home?"
"Yeah, well, ya weren't," he called out from the other room.
"Yeah, but what if I was?" I yelled back.
"But ya weren't!" he shouted and I could hear that he was verging on a roar. I understood where the anger came from.
He was terrified of losing me.
I was content even as I sat in the middle of my gutted apartment. He loved me. I was good.
* * * *
He ended up taking me to get a steak because he said I nee
ded the iron. I looked pale, he told me, and so I was fed a fillet and a loaded baked potato with a Greek salad on the side. I had Key lime pie for dessert and a cappuccino and was promised all sorts of carnal pleasures when he got home. I took issue with the end of the sentence, when he got home, but wasn't allowed to argue with him as he tucked me into his bed with the remote for the TV and a hot cup of chamomile tea. He had to go supervise the crime scene and explain why my clothes had been removed, along with my laptop and my books. No amount of whining or cajoling or begging was going to keep him from being there while the crime scene guys went through my place. I wanted him home with me and he wanted to know who had been in my apartment. He changed the subject by telling me how smart I had been not to buy a real bed. Now I had nothing to put into storage or sell or give away. I didn't realize until I had all my things back at Sam's that I had never put any money into the apartment.
It was a place to live and as much as I loved it, as happy as I had been to be there, it was still just a stop on the tour. My place was with Sam and his apartment felt like going home.
He was right—I belonged there.
I got a long, hot kiss before he left and he propped up my ankle and hooked me back up to the ice machine. He showed me how to turn it off after an hour and unwrap my ankle.
He'd wrapped it back up in the Ace bandage when he got home. I argued that he should stay with me and he ordered me not to open the door for anybody. Period.
"What about your mom?"
"What?" He stopped at the door to look at me, clearly annoyed.
"Can I open the door for your mom?"
"Yes," he said quickly, turning to go.
"How about Dane?"
"Oh for crissakes, Jory, you know what the fuck I mean!"
I chuckled and he shot me a look before he stalked down the hall.
"Bye!" I called out to him.
He came back and leaned down and kissed me, this time tenderly, slowly, breathing me in. When he pulled back, I leaned with him as far as I could.
"Just sit here and rest. Stop bein' a brat."
I scowled at him and he left. I heard the front door shut and then the clicking of several locks. He wasn't taking any chances. My phone rang seconds later.
"Hi." I sighed, nestling down into the bed.
"I'm gonna drive you to work in the morning and pick you up after. From now on you go nowhere without me. You understand?"
"I understand," I sighed. I loved it when he was possessive and told me what to do. Nobody else had ever cared, besides Dane. The two men in my life who—"Oh shit."
"Oh shit what?"
"I gotta tell Dane about you."
"And that's bad?"
"It's kinda bad."
"Why?"
"He thinks I'm wasting my time with you."
"I'll talk to him. Gimme his number."
"Are you kidding?"
He laughed softly. "Baby, I know you're afraid of Dane Harcourt but believe me—I'm not."
I wasn't convinced of his sanity. Not afraid of Dane?
"Okay."
He repeated the number back to me and told me to watch TV or start my novel.
"You're hysterical," I grumbled. "Just come back soon."
"I will, baby. I love you."
Words so casually spoken that tore right through me. "I love you too."
And when he hung up I closed my eyes and grabbed his pillow. It smelled like him and I was content to lie there in the warm apartment and wait for my man to come home.
* * * *
I woke up and realized the room was dark. I was under the covers and when I shifted I hit a mass of solid heat. Sam was beside me, sleeping soundly on his stomach. I rolled over, draping my good leg over the back of his thighs and read the digital display on his nightstand. It was just after four in the morning. I had no idea how long he'd been in bed, but from the chill in his legs I couldn't imagine long. He had to be exhausted. He usually slept in pajama bottoms but he was naked. I couldn't keep my hands off him.
"I'm glad you're home," I whispered before I kissed the spot between his shoulder blades.
He grunted but didn't move.
I rolled off him, onto my back, and stared at the ceiling in the darkness, trying to make my body calm down. I wanted him but he was tired and I had to kill my motor. When he shifted, turning toward me, his hand going to my abdomen, I froze under his touch. I had butterflies in my stomach along with the familiar tensing, heat was racing through me. It was his fault. I craved him.
"Why are you awake?" he asked softly, his hand sliding down my bare skin, slipping under the waistband of my sweats, inside my briefs to touch me, wrap his fingers around me.
I groaned, arching up into his hand.
"Your skin is so hot, J."
"Please," I begged him, moving, sliding in and out of his fist. "Please, baby."
He rolled off the bed and I heard him fumbling around as I pulled off my clothes, stripping naked as fast as I could. A drawer opened, there was the pop of a cap and then his hand on my thigh, dragging me forward, my bent legs resting on his arms, his lubed fingers slipping inside me gently as his other hand closed around my cock.
"You missed me."
I moaned out his name and I felt him tense before he slid deep inside my body. I wasn't prepared for the laughter that came instantly.
"Why're you—"
"You just feel so good. I'm such an idiot."
"Sam?"
He pushed in again, burying himself in me, and I cried out, clutching at him, wanting him closer, deeper, the sensations exquisite and wanted.
"God, J, why would I ever be so stupid to let you go when I love you so goddamn much, and it feels like this being in bed with you? Jesus, I'm an idiot."
I pulled him down for a kiss as my orgasm built.
"You're in love with the village idiot," he breathed against my mouth.
"You're not an idiot anymore," I assured him, my back bowed, barely breathing as I quaked and bucked under him.
I felt his hand slide over my stomach, touch the muscles clenching there.
"No, I'm not," he agreed, setting a pounding pace that brought gasps from me instead of words. "Everybody's gonna know you're mine."
Which was all I ever wanted.
"I missed you so bad."
When I moaned, he clutched me tight and I thought, just for a second, that I'd died. Surely it wasn't possible to feel that good and still be alive. He told me I needed to get used to it. He wasn't going anywhere and making love to him was going to be exhausting.
I was ready for the challenge.
Chapter Eight
He had called me and told me to wait at work for him, so I was still there at seven-thirty when he walked in and collapsed onto the overstuffed loveseat in the corner of my office. I stood there looking at him, watching as he raked his hands through his hair and slowly let his head roll to the side to look at me.
"Talk to me," I said gently, walking around my desk to sit on the edge of it.
"Jesus, what a weird day."
I was reverent because I knew what he had been up against, the end of his partnership. "It was hard, huh?"
"You could say that," he breathed out. "And you could say surreal instead if you wanted to."
I stared at him. "Can you explain that?"
Heavy sigh as he stretched out his long body, his fingers laced behind his head, his feet out in front of him. "Well, for starters, this morning I went right in to talk to my captain and ask him for a new partner, but before I could even explain why, before I can even get out a word about you, he makes a call and I have to go meet with IAD."
"What's—"
"Internal Affairs Division, they check out cops. That's their deal."
"Okay. So what'd they want with you? Surely Dom didn't tell them about—"
He shook his head. "No, baby. They weren't interested in me. They wanted to know about Dom."
I stared at him.
"Remember when yo
u said his place was really nice... well I guess I didn't know, but it actually is. Turns out he's been on the take since like day one. He's the leak in the department. He's the one that told Roman where to find Brian. He's the one that told them where to find you."
"Oh shit."
"Oh yeah." He gave me a hint of a smile. "That little home invasion he had, you remember, you were there? Well, it turns out that that was the work of one of the guys who pays Dom off, wanting to send him a message."
"By doing what? Killing him?"
"I have no idea. I just know now, from meeting with IAD, who they were."
"Is Dom still working?"
"No, he's got put on leave pending a full-scale investigation."
"What did your captain say?"
He exhaled deeply, closing his eyes for a long minute before opening them, only to stare at the ceiling "It was so weird... I mean, he was just so thrilled I asked for a new partner today. I guess he's been telling IAD I was clean, but because of Dom they would have gone on investigating me too, but since I... it makes me look like I'm innocent and—"
"But you are."
"Yeah, but it could've been so bad. And it still is 'cause now that I'm basically on the outside and I can't talk to Dom... he's under investigation and they pulled him in so he knows, and Jesus, what a day."
"Did everyone look at you like you were a narc?"
"No. I was his partner, everybody's lookin' at me like I knew he was dirty but I was loyal to him. They figure it finally got to be too much so I requested the change, nothing else.
Everybody figures I was good for keeping his secret, just wanting out, ya know? I'm getting hero treatment."
"So where does that leave you?"
"That leaves me pretty well off. Anything Dominic says about me nobody'll believe, and tomorrow I get my new partner, Ricky de Silva. He's moving over from homicide."
"You know him?"
"I know of him and he's a good cop. We talked today and he said he's excited to work with me. I'll bring him by here tomorrow to meet you."
"Why?"
"'Cause if he's got a problem I need to know right off,
'cause ya hafta be a hundred percent honest with your partner. I made the mistake of not telling Dom what was going on with me. I won't do that again."
