Witness

by Mandasue Heller

  Josie started mumbling. Unable to make out the words, Holly touched her arm, and said, ‘Mum . . .? Are you awake?’

  ‘No . . .’ Josie croaked, her eyes still closed.

  Thinking it was a reply to her question, Holly said, ‘I’m going to get you a drink; won’t be a sec.’

  ‘No!’ Josie said again, more forcefully. ‘You can’t have her, she’s mine! Leave us alone . . . !’

  Holly gazed down at her and wondered if she was dreaming or delirious. She was shivering, even though she was still sweating, and a small patch of what looked like fresh blood had appeared on the side of the gown – the side she’d kept clutching at earlier. Curious to see where it was coming from in case it needed attention, Holly tentatively lifted the gown to take a look. A square dressing had been applied to the skin above her mum’s hip, but one of the pieces of tape holding it in place had come loose, and she could see a small wound beneath it. Blood and pus had oozed out, but it didn’t appear to be bleeding now, so she carefully pushed the tape back down before laying the quilt over her mum.

  She placed a glass of water on the bedside cabinet. Then, drained and in need of sleep herself, she took the bottle of vodka into her room and stashed it in her underwear drawer before climbing into bed – leaving the door open so she would hear if her mum started moving around in the night.

  24

  Suzie had gone straight to bed after leaving Holly’s flat for the second time, but as tired as she was her brain refused to switch off. Instead she found herself staring at the silhouettes of the bottles of perfume, hairbrushes and assorted tubes of make-up on the dressing table as she thought about everything that had happened tonight.

  She wasn’t sure why Josie had taken such an instant dislike to her, but it was clear from the things Holly had said after her mum collapsed that Josie wasn’t in her right mind. All that stuff about them having to leave because someone was coming to kill them both was bizarre. And that – added to her controlling behaviour in not allowing Holly to talk to their neighbours, go out, or even answer the door – made Suzie wonder if Josie was bipolar, like her own mum. That level of paranoia wasn’t normal, so something was definitely wrong with her, and Suzie pitied Holly for having to deal with it. The poor girl had enough problems at school, where even her so-called friends looked down their noses at her. Home was supposed to be a safe haven away from all those outside pressures, but that flat was no haven for Holly. It was a prison.

  The doorbell rang, and Suzie frowned when she glanced at the clock and saw that it was almost 2 a.m. She had told Holly to ring if anything happened, but there were no missed calls on her phone. Hoping it wasn’t something serious, because she wasn’t sure how much more she could cope with tonight, she got up and pulled her dressing gown on before making her way down the stairs.

  She’d been sure that it would be Holly, so it was a shock to see Rob on the step when she peeped through the spyhole. It had been almost three weeks since she’d seen or heard from him, and she wondered if he had been laying low on purpose, lulling her into a false sense of security before turning up to finish what he’d started the last time he was here. But why would he knock if that was his intention? Wouldn’t he be worried that she would call the police as soon as she saw him?

  Still mulling this over, she jumped when Rob turned his head and stared straight at the spyhole. He gave a tentative smile which told her that he knew she was there, and said, ‘You not going to open it?’

  ‘What do you want?’ she called through the wood.

  ‘To talk,’ he said.

  ‘About what?’

  ‘If you open up, I’ll tell you. I won’t keep you long, I promise.’

  He smiled again, and Suzie tutted softly before unlocking the door and peering out at him.

  ‘What are you doing here, Rob? It’s late.’

  ‘Sorry.’ Rob’s smile morphed into the puppy-dog look that had always melted her heart. ‘I just wanted to see you.’

  Irritated when her stomach gave an involuntary flutter, Suzie folded her arms defensively. She’d forgotten how handsome he was, and her head was still swimming at the unexpected sight of him.

  ‘I’ve missed you,’ he went on wistfully.

  ‘Well, I haven’t missed you,’ she lied, determined not to let him sweet-talk her. ‘And you got me out of bed, so . . .’

  ‘Don’t be like that,’ Rob sighed.

  ‘Like what?’ she shot back. ‘You didn’t seriously think you could turn up in the middle of the night and I’d welcome you back with open arms, did you?’

  ‘A man can hope, can’t he?’

  ‘You nearly killed me, Rob.’

  ‘I know, and I’ll never forgive myself for that,’ Rob said, contrite now. ‘It probably won’t make any difference, but I’ve been working on my temper while I’ve been staying at my mum’s. I’ve done an anger-management course and it’s made me see things differently.’

  ‘Really?’ Suzie rolled her eyes.

  ‘On my life,’ he insisted. ‘That’s why it’s taken so long for me to come round. My mentor said I needed to sort my head out before I spoke to you.’

  ‘And what makes you think I want to speak to you?’

  ‘Well, you opened the door, and you haven’t slammed it in my face yet, so that’s a good start.’

  ‘That can easily be rectified.’ Suzie placed her hand on the wood.

  ‘OK, I get it, you’re not interested,’ Rob said. ‘I only came round to apologize, but you don’t have to worry about me bothering you again, ’cos I’m moving to Scotland.’

  ‘At this time of night?’ Suzie asked, noticing the heavy-looking rucksack over his shoulder for the first time. ‘I didn’t think trains ran this late.’

  ‘I’m going tomorrow,’ Rob said. ‘But I needed to get out of my mum’s place, ’cos it’s getting a bit . . .’ He paused and narrowed his eyes, as if searching for the right word. Then, shrugging, he said, ‘Let’s just say I’m not her favourite person right now.’

  ‘Why, what’ve you done?’

  ‘Nothing. I’ve been good as gold.’

  Suzie snorted her disbelief. ‘If that was true, you’d be home in bed now, not standing on my doorstep at two in the morning in the freezing cold.’

  ‘Scout’s honour.’ Rob held up two fingers. ‘It’s not me, it’s her new bloke. The guy’s a total bell-end; sits around all day in his vest and boxers, drinking cider and ordering her about like some kind of skivvy. I pulled him up about it earlier and he squared up to me, so I had to have a word.’

  ‘You mean you went for him?’

  ‘No, I didn’t touch him – I warned him. The daft cow thinks she’s in love, so she took his side and now I’m the bad guy. But I swear I didn’t hit him. I’d have been out of there in a few hours anyway, so I thought I might as well save myself the aggro and leave early.’

  He sounded sincere, but Suzie wasn’t sure if she believed him. She knew from bitter experience how fast he could snap, and she couldn’t see him backing down if someone fronted up to him – especially someone who was supposedly treating his mum like crap.

  Watching her face as the thoughts went through her mind, Rob said, ‘It wasn’t easy to walk away, but I did it, and I’m proud of myself for that. I don’t expect you to believe me, but I wanted you to know that I’ve changed – even if it’s too late to make a difference for us. Anyway . . .’ He hefted the strap of his rucksack higher on his shoulder. ‘I’ll get out of your hair and let you get back to bed. Take care, yeah?’

  He tugged his collar up around his throat and walked up the path. It had started to rain while they were talking, and the wind was whipping rubbish around the road behind him as he stepped out onto the pavement and pulled the gate shut.

  Shivering in the doorway, Suzie said, ‘Where are you going to sleep if you can’t go back to your mum’s?’

  ‘I’ll find a bench to kip on,’ Rob said, squinting at her through the raindrops clinging to his eyelashes.
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  ‘In this?’ Suzie pulled a face. ‘Haven’t you got any friends who’ll put you up?’

  ‘Nah, I don’t want to be bothering anyone at this time of night.’

  ‘You weren’t worried about bothering me,’ she snorted.

  ‘Yeah, sorry about that,’ he apologized. ‘I wanted to see you, but it was selfish. I shouldn’t have come.’

  Sighing, Suzie said, ‘You’re here now, and I’m awake, so you might as well come in and have a brew while you wait for this to die down.’

  ‘It’s all right, I’ll get something at the station,’ Rob said. ‘Thanks for caring, though.’

  ‘I didn’t say I cared,’ she replied, irritated to realize that she did. Then, before she knew she had even thought it, she heard herself saying, ‘And I suppose you could sleep on the sofa tonight if you’ve really got nowhere else to go.’

  ‘Cheers, but I don’t think that’s a very good idea,’ said Rob. ‘I don’t want you thinking I’m taking advantage of you.’

  ‘I offered,’ Suzie reminded him, unsure why she was trying to persuade him to stay when she ought to be glad to see the back of him.

  ‘I know, and I appreciate it, but I think I’d rather sleep on a bench.’

  ‘Charming!’ Suzie was offended and it showed.

  ‘I didn’t mean that the way it sounded.’ Rob chuckled. ‘Truth is, it’d be hard sleeping under the same roof, knowing I’ve blown it with you. Best I save you the aggro and me the regret, and walk away while it’s good, eh?’

  ‘Stop playing the bloody martyr and come in,’ Suzie said brusquely. ‘Now, before I change my mind.’

  Rob tilted his head to one side. ‘Are you sure?’

  ‘Yes,’ she said, already wishing she’d kept her mouth shut. She hadn’t had sex since they’d broken up, and he had a way of getting under her skin like no man before him ever had, so she probably wouldn’t sleep a wink knowing he was in the house.

  Rob put his hand on the gate latch, and a panicked voice in Suzie’s head hissed, What are you doing, you idiot? Tell him you’ve changed your mind! Quick, before—

  ‘OK, if you really don’t mind.’ He pushed the gate open. ‘But I’ll be gone first thing.’

  ‘Mmmm hmmm,’ she murmured, closing her eyes when he brushed past her and the combined scents of his aftershave and personal musk enveloped her.

  About to follow him inside, she hesitated when someone called, ‘Excuse me . . .’ and she looked out across the road and saw Holly’s neighbour, Gee, climbing out of the back of a taxi.

  ‘How’s the girl?’ he asked, pulling his hood up and jogging over to her. ‘Sorry, I don’t know her name.’

  ‘It’s Holly, and she’s OK,’ Suzie told him, conscious of Rob standing in the hallway behind her, his eyes burning into her neck. Her talking to another man – especially one as good-looking as Gee was close up, with his warm eyes, his beautifully shaped mouth and chiselled cheekbones – was exactly the kind of thing that made him see red in the past. But if he dared try any of that shit on her tonight, she would kick his arse out so fast his head would spin.

  ‘That’s good,’ Gee said, stuffing his hands into his pockets and hunching his shoulders against the wind. ‘She was in a bit of a state when I saw her earlier. Something about her mum getting attacked?’

  ‘Yeah, but it wasn’t as bad as we thought. And her mum’s home now, so it’s all good.’

  ‘Cool. I’m glad it worked out for her.’

  ‘Me, too,’ Suzie said, thinking what a genuinely nice guy he was to take the time to check on Holly like this when he barely knew her.

  ‘Night, then,’ Gee said, smiling as he backed away. ‘Tell Holly I said hi.’

  ‘Will do. Night.’

  Turning when he’d gone, Suzie looked at Rob and raised an eyebrow when she saw an all-too-familiar glint in his eyes. ‘What?’ she asked, staying put in the doorway in case she had to make a run for it.

  The glint disappeared as fast as it had appeared, and Rob smiled, all innocence and light again. ‘You mentioned a drink?’

  Eyeing him warily for a second and deciding that she had probably imagined the glimpse of the old him, Suzie said, ‘I’ll put the kettle on.’

  ‘I’d rather have beer, if you’ve got any?’ Rob said, following her into the kitchen and looking around when she went over to the fridge. ‘It’s funny how much you can miss a place when you haven’t been there for a while, isn’t it?’ he said, running his hand over the back of a chair. ‘I used to love eating in here with you.’

  Giving him a look as if to say, You’re the one who got yourself thrown out, Suzie passed a can of lager to him – quickly snatching her hand back when his fingertips brushed her flesh and her stomach tingled.

  ‘So what was that about just now?’ Rob asked, peeling the tab off the can. ‘Who’s Holly?’

  ‘The girl you nearly went for when you got back from the police station the other week,’ Suzie said, flapping her hand at him to move so she could take a clean glass out of the cupboard.

  ‘The one from the flats?’ Rob took a seat at the table and eyed her over the rim of the can as he sucked the froth off the beer. ‘Why’s he asking you about her?’

  ‘Her mum got attacked in the alley and rushed to hospital,’ Suzie explained, pouring a glass of wine for herself. ‘She was in a state, so I offered to stay with her. I would have brought her here, but the police wouldn’t let me,’ she added, frowning when she remembered that he was the reason for that.

  ‘You don’t even know her, so why would you put yourself out like that?’ Rob asked.

  ‘Actually, I’ve spent a lot of time with her since you left,’ Suzie informed him. ‘She’s nice, and I was glad of the company,’ she added, deciding not to mention what she and Holly had been doing. He’d belittled her when she had told him her plans to start the agency a few months back, asking why any girl with half an ounce of what it took to be a model would want her for an agent when she’d never even managed to land a major campaign for herself. Anyway, if she told him about the photo sessions, he’d ask to see the pictures, and she wasn’t sure she wanted him to see the ones Holly had taken of her in her lingerie. It might be ridiculous, since he had already seen every inch of her body in intimate detail. But that was when they’d been a couple. And now they weren’t, it didn’t feel right.

  ‘Hey, it’s your business who you hang out with,’ Rob said, smiling slyly as he added: ‘As long as it’s a girl and not some hunky dude.’

  Aware that he was talking about Gee, Suzie gave him a stern look. ‘He was asking about Holly, not me. They’re neighbours and he was concerned about her.’

  ‘Sorry,’ Rob apologized. ‘It was meant to be a joke. Like I said, none of my business.’

  Unused to him apologizing before a fight, because he usually reserved that for after, Suzie said, ‘It’s freezing in here. Why don’t you go and turn the fire on while I get the spare quilt? And, here, take this.’ She handed her wine glass to him.

  Standing up when she headed upstairs, Rob went to the living room and turned on the lamp and the fire. Then, kicking off his trainers, he sprawled on the sofa and put his feet up on the coffee table.

  ‘Make yourself comfortable, why don’t you?’ Suzie muttered when she came in, flashing a look at his feet as she placed the bedding she’d brought down for him onto the armchair.

  ‘Sorry.’ He quickly sat up and dropped his feet to the floor. ‘Keep forgetting I don’t live here any more.’

  ‘No, I’m sorry,’ Suzie sighed, flopping down at the other end of the sofa and reaching for her wine. ‘It’s been a long day; didn’t mean to be narky.’

  ‘You look wiped,’ Rob said, lighting two cigarettes and passing one to her.

  Thanking him, Suzie took a drag and then a swig of wine before resting her head back against the cushion. ‘I haven’t been sleeping very well,’ she admitted. ‘That’s why I answered the door so fast when you rang.’

  ‘Haven’t yo
u got any of those tablets the doctor gave you last time?’

  ‘No, I ran out. But it’s OK. It usually only lasts a few nights.’

  ‘You work too hard.’ Rob placed an ashtray on the cushion between them. ‘How many bookings have you had this week?’

  ‘A couple,’ Suzie lied, embarrassed to admit that she hadn’t had a single one since he’d left – and her agent hadn’t replied to any of her calls, so she doubted she’d be getting any in the foreseeable future. She had to face facts: she’d hit the top of the mythical hill and was well and truly on the slide down the other side. That was why she desperately needed to get her agency up and running: before her savings ran out and she ended up homeless as well as jobless.

  Rob settled back in his seat and looked around as the heat from the fire lifted the chill off the room.

  ‘It’s so peaceful in here,’ he sighed, resting the beer can on his stomach. ‘I’m grateful my mum let me stay at hers, but she’s so stuck in the past it was like being trapped in a coffin at times.’

  ‘Don’t talk about her like that,’ Suzie chided. ‘She’s nice.’

  ‘She says the same about you,’ Rob said – lying through his teeth, because his mum had done nothing but slag Suzie off since finding out she’d had him arrested.

  ‘Really?’ Suzie was surprised. ‘I always got the impression she didn’t like me.’

  ‘Are you kidding me?’ Rob laughed. ‘If she had her way, we’d be married with a house full of kids by now. But you’d have to be the barefoot-and-chained-to-the-cooker type wife, or she’d be round here every day training you how to show proper respect to your man.’

  He grinned and Suzie gave an exaggerated shudder. ‘God forbid,’ she muttered, gulping her wine.

  ‘Have you ever thought about it?’ Rob asked, propping his elbow on the back of the sofa and resting his cheek on his hand. ‘What our kids might look like if we’d stuck it out, I mean?’