Dying to Go Viral

by Sylvia McNicoll

  “Mmm. With your mom.” He poured himself a coffee. “You know there’s a GO Train that takes you there if you want to go with Scratch,” he suggested.

  “I wanted us to go as a family,” I told him. “Before Devon leaves.”

  “It’s too busy at work right now. Friday, maybe, I can arrange something.”

  “Niagara Falls?” I asked.

  He grinned. “No, I thought maybe…something outdoorsy. One of my clients wants me to experience their service and I’ve been trying to squeeze it in. Gotta run.” He kissed my forehead.

  “A fishing service?” I asked.

  “Not exactly. But you did say you like fish now, didn’t you? So there you go.” I couldn’t tell if he was kidding or not. “It will be a surprise. Bye.”

  “Fine, I’ll go to Niagara Falls with Scratch,” I grumbled. I called and woke Scratch to invite him.

  He didn’t answer for a few seconds. “Sure,” he finally said in a groggy voice.

  “Get up then. Don’t fall back asleep.”

  “I’m up. I’m up.” He groaned.

  “You sure your mom will like you going?”

  “Better than skateboarding. Besides she’s not going to know. She’s leaving for a temp placement in another hour.”

  I felt bad about him not telling her but I wanted his company more than his honesty. “Don’t forget to bring your pills this time,” I reminded him.

  “I won’t.”

  “Great. I’ll bring sandwiches.” I hung up and immediately grabbed a loaf of whole grain from the fridge. When I hit the cupboard for peanut butter, from out of nowhere Oreo appeared and began his slow leg swish, in and around in a figure eight. “You don’t like peanut butter, remember?” His forgetfulness might have made me sad last week before my death, but now I just smiled, scooped a little on my finger and bent over to refresh his memory.

  Oreo purred. I felt the vibration through my legs.

  His nose poked and prodded around the dab. “Scratch and I love this stuff but not you.” His pink tongue sampled in desperation.

  Mreaow! he complained.

  “I’ll get you some food you like in a minute.” In the meantime I washed the rest off my hand and began spreading some on the bread. In school, nut allergies banned our favourite lunch but today Scratch and I were both still free. No jam either—we were peanut butter purists.

  The sandwiches, some apples, and a metal bottle full of ice water went into my backpack. There were plenty of stands and restaurants in Niagara but I didn’t want to waste any time in the lines. Oreo earned another tin of tuna with all his leg swishing. Then I took my shower, got dressed, and rushed out the door so I could cash my cheque at the bank for spending money.

  Safety gear all in place, I used my skateboard to get to the bank—all downhill so it was a superfast ride. Then, money in my backpack, I skated to Scratch’s, leaving the board and gear at his house. Niagara Falls would be too crowded at this time of year to use it. We walked to the bus stop where our favourite driver picked us up immediately but took his time getting to the train station.

  “Wouldn’t it be nice to have a car,” Scratch complained as we passed by Aiden’s house with the Mustang in the driveway.

  I swallowed hard. My knees jiggled and I slapped my hands on them to make them stop.

  “You okay?” Scratch asked.

  “Sure.” What had Mom said? You make your own choices and face the consequences. It wasn’t the Mustang’s fault that I died. I was the one who made the bad decision. I snapped myself out of it and managed a smile. “Someday you’ll even get your licence. But today we have our very own chauffeur,” I said, gesturing to the bus driver.

  The bus finally arrived at the station and I bought our GO train tickets. “Let me pay for them. This was my idea.”

  Scratch didn’t argue. It was the end of the summer, so he didn’t have much money left.

  Despite everything, it felt wonderful to be going to one of my favourite spots with my childhood buddy. We climbed to the top level of the train, high above the world. I loved riding there. The sun shone and I was going to enjoy the scenery. Except that the swaying motion relaxed me, and my arms and legs felt loose. It was like being rocked in a cradle. My head slumped, my body leaned over. My eyelids drooped. A little while later someone shook my shoulder gently and I came to. I had been leaning on Scratch, head on his shoulder. His arm was behind my neck.

  “We’re here.” He blinked a few times as though he’d been sleeping too. His cheeks looked flushed, not pale like Aiden’s, and he pulled his arm free.

  Another bus ride and we finally stepped off at the parkway. We could have been dropped off right at the foot of the Falls but I preferred to stroll alongside the rapids, building the anticipation. On one side, lush trees and flowers in all colours grew. A clock made out of blossoms told the time with the letters of “NIAGARA ” spelled across the top and “FALL S” across the bottom. Both hands were on the G. It was noon. Ahead, droplets of water misted the air into clouds surrounding the actual falls. We walked toward the Table Rock House for the best view. I’ve probably seen the falls a hundred times, yet the roar of the water and the people all surging around that spectacular ledge still made my heart beat double time.

  “Hurry up, Scratch!” I grabbed his arm and dragged him along faster.

  The sun sparkled in diamonds off the white and blue waves. As we drew closer, the water thundered. Wildness and energy, fury even, as 500,000 gallons of water hurled itself over the cliff every second. Forever and ever.

  And above it all, a rainbow.

  My mother’s promise again. I’m doing everything better this time, I promised her. I’m learning to make better choices.

  We ate our sandwiches on a park bench and then Scratch wanted to stroll along the tourist strip, Lundy’s Lane, which has to be the cheesiest street in the world. Against the wonder of the falls, the Ripley’s Believe it or Not and the Guinness Book of Records Museums just didn’t inspire awe. Neither did the wax museum or the horror houses or the midway rides. All the bright colours and strange statues and displays just made me want to rush back to the parkway to stare and ponder, mouth open, at all that white water crashing over a cliff.

  Still, when we turned the next corner to head back, I came across an attraction that did call my attention.

  The main building was a triangle made of hundreds of other glass triangles. To the side stood a round, white tower with a picture of a man in a blue-and-red outfit floating on it. The words immediately above read “Niagara Freefall” but at the top were the key words: Indoor Skydiving.

  “Maybe we can still do it,” I said out loud.

  “Do what?” Scratch asked.

  I pointed. “Jump out of a plane. Dad said I had to be eighteen. Come on. Let’s check it out.”

  “Whatever they call it, I’m pretty sure there’s no jumping out of a plane involved. No harm in looking.”

  As we drew closer, I could have sworn I heard the roar of a jet engine.

  We crossed the street and stepped into the reception area. There was a lineup but I snuck ahead to read the rules.

  Ask for group rates. Great for team-building.

  Scratch caught up to me.

  “Can I help you with something?” a man behind the counter asked.

  “How old do you have to be?” I asked.

  “Seven,” he answered. He pointed at Scratch’s arm. “But he can’t do it with that cast.”

  “That’s okay, you can go,” Scratch suggested. “I’ll wait.”

  “I’m not going to do it alone. I’ll call Dad and see if he and Devon can join us later. We can do it as a family.”

  We stepped outside to make sure we could get reception. I keyed in redial for Dad’s number. He picked up and I heard hurry up in his hello. So I did. I rushed out the words about how I’d found this place in Niagara Falls that would allow even me to skydive only indoors. “Remember how you couldn’t be there for me last night on my birthd
ay? Well, now you can make that all up to me if you could just come with Devon. After work, even. The whole thing only takes about…fifty minutes,” I read that part from the poster on the wall.

  “Have you heard anything I’ve said over the last few days? I’m busy. We’ve got crazy deadlines coming up. Even your brother’s working full-out to pitch in. I just don’t have time right now.”

  Chapter 12

  WHEN YOUR NUMBER'S UP

  He just didn’t have time right now. And right now was all we had. I swallowed hard and squeezed my eyes shut.

  “Look, I said I’d try to arrange for us to do something Friday.”

  “Sure, Dad.”

  “I’m sorry you’re so bored. Next summer, Jade, I swear you’re coming to the office with me.”

  “No,” I said softly, forgetting myself.

  “What?”

  “Oh, nothing. I was talking to Scratch.” I’d nearly said I wouldn’t be here next summer. I’d never have the chance to work side by side with Dad. It might have been nice. “I’m not bored, Dad. I just thought that us as a family making some kind of big leap together would be…healing. We never do anything exciting together.”

  “Some other time. Just not today. This week has been awful.”

  If only I could tell him, if only he knew—we had less than six days left together. “Okay, Dad. Bye.” I hesitated a moment. The biggest leap we could take with each other was expressing some kind of emotion. “I love you.”

  “I love you, too.”

  I pressed end and swallowed a lump of ache in my throat. I knew he loved me and he had to know that I loved him back.

  Scratch looked me in the eyes. “When my cast comes off, I’ll go with you.”

  “That’s okay,” I said.

  “No, really. Indoor skydiving sounds great. Not something parents like but still.” He took my elbow. “Come on, let’s walk back.”

  Would Dad really plan something for Friday? Or would some other thing come up? Some meeting or catastrophe only he could handle.

  A couple passed us, pushing a stroller with a cute little girl in it. I smiled at her. I would have liked to have kids one day.

  No children, no wedding, none of the normal happy things of life for me. I looked up to the cloud of mist to get my good mood back. I searched for the rainbow. My skin felt the mist before I saw it.

  Then in front of us, all those colours arced against the water. There are still many wonders for us to explore. My mother’s words were comforting—still I was pretty sure those wonders didn’t included childbirth and raising children.

  We crossed the street back to the Table Rock. A bus stopped right in front of us.

  “Do you want to catch this one?” Scratch asked.

  “No.” I sighed. “Let’s just go back and look at the water a while longer.”

  “Okay. Another hour and then we’ll have to catch the train.”

  We found a bench and sat down, tired from walking up the hill and down. I put my legs up across Scratch’s lap. All that water rushing, so many people from different countries who had watched it just like us. There were lots more people who would never get this opportunity.

  This was nice, me and Scratch, two best friends sharing one of the wonders of the world. In some ways, I really was lucky.

  Later, on the bus ride home, I made Scratch promise to tell his mother they were going to the teacher/student barbecue on Thursday.

  “Do you really think your dad and my mom will hit it off?” Scratch asked.

  “Why not? What do you think it takes for two older people to fall for each other?”

  “I don’t know. Desperation?” He chuckled.

  I frowned at him. “My father’s not desperate.”

  “No. Of course not. He’s got a lot going for him. Sorry, it’s just—well, she’s my mother. I just can’t imagine any guy wanting to date her.”

  “I like your mom. Better than some unknown person who calls herself The Lyrical One. You should be nicer to her.” Careful, I told myself. This wouldn’t be something the old Jade would say. But it was based on something I’d always known even before my death. So saying it should be safe. If I couldn’t save Dad from himself, maybe I could get Scratch to appreciate his mother; a small improvement in the cosmos.

  Scratch rooted in his pocket and fished out his vial of pills. He popped open the top, shook out a couple and dry swallowed them.

  “Does it hurt much?” I asked.

  “Not really. That’s just so when Mom asks whether I took my painkillers I can say yes. Here’s my stop. Coming to get your skateboard?”

  I shook my head. “I’ll pick it up tomorrow. I just want to get home now. Bye.”

  He waved to me as he stood up. When he passed the bus outside, we waved at each other again.

  I got off at my stop. No jeep in the driveway, I thought, as I walked up the sidewalk to our house. Why would Dad come home on time today? He’d been busy at work the whole week before my death last time. But I kind of expected him because he knew he had disappointed me over the sky jump.

  I had to use my keys to get in. “Devon, Devon?”

  Mreow! The cat tiptoed stiffly towards me, his back legs lame from sleeping all day. I patted his head and listened to more complaints. Then I let him out.

  No Devon. Right! Tuesday. He’d worked full-out today, Dad had said. I frowned for a second thinking again about how I’d never get to do that. Then I pulled my list from my back pocket, ducked into Dad’s office, and grabbed a pen from the desk. I sat down and added:

  Work with Dad. Even if it’s just for a day. I dialed him at Brilliant Graphics.

  “When are you coming home?” I asked. “It’s six thirty already.”

  “Oh, jeez. You’re right.” Dad sounded flustered. “I’ve got another couple hours before I get that print job back. Then we’ll come home. You go ahead and order some food for yourself. Ask Hailey over.”

  “Hailey’s in Magog for two weeks, remember?”

  “Right, I forgot.” Silence, maybe some guilt, Dad just sighed.

  I swallowed and asked him what I wanted to know. “Dad, can I come in and work with you tomorrow?”

  “I don’t think that’s such a great idea. I don’t have time to show you things.”

  “I can proofread text. You know I’m great at that.”

  He chuckled. “Yeah, you would have caught that missing apostrophe in the flyer and we wouldn’t still be here.”

  “Does that mean yes?”

  “Your last week before school starts and you want to work at Brilliant Graphics?” Dad was smiling—I could hear it in the way he spoke.

  “My last six days. And yes, I would like to be with you while you’re designing on one of those days, if possible.”

  The doorbell rang. I walked through the hall, phone still at my ear, but froze when I saw the blue Mustang through the front window.

  “You there, Jade?” Dad asked. “Did you hear me? I said sure, you can come in to work tomorrow.”

  “Great, Dad. I’ll see you later.” I took a few deep breaths. Things were going my way. I didn’t need to be afraid of that car. I pictured the rainbow in my head again and opened the door.

  Chapter 13

  DROP DEAD GORGEOUS

  “Hey, it’s Jade, right?”

  I nodded and smiled. “Hi, Aiden.” I straightened my shoulders and stood tall to make sure I looked old enough.

  “Devon back yet?”

  I shook my head and stared at his lips. The bottom one made his mouth look pouty.

  “Do you know how long he’ll be?” Aiden’s eyes didn’t move from my face. His pale skin and dark eyes made his stare seem more intense.

  I flipped my hair back over my shoulders. “He’s going to be late. Maybe a couple of hours. Have you eaten yet?”

  “Yeah, why?”

  I smiled and shrugged. “It’s just that I have a craving for French fries on the beach but no way of getting there.”

 
“I’ll take you, kid, no problem. I’m always up for Hutch’s.”

  When someone calls you kid, you know he’s not thinking of you as girlfriend material. Still, he had just offered to take me to Hutch’s which was a ’50s style restaurant on the Hamilton side of the bay. Best I’d hoped for was the little stand where I’d bought ice cream the other day. From the Hamilton beach we could watch the sun set together. Over the lake. That could be pretty romantic. The drive over would take at least twenty minutes and I could sit in the front seat, finally. “Come on in. I’ll just get my things together.”

  He stepped into the entrance hall and I motioned to the living room.

  “Make yourself at home. I’ll only be a few minutes.” In case he was watching, I forced myself to calmly stroll to the bathroom where I put some makeup on for the second time this summer. The eyeliner went on straight only because I put it on quickly, before my hands could start to shake. When my nerves did catch up to my movements, I missed my lashes with the mascara wand and had to wipe the smudge off my lid with my baby finger.

  I smothered my lips with balm, hopefully making them look oh-so-kissable. Then I brushed my teeth, just in case, which was stupid because I had to reapply the balm. I stacked my hair up loosely with clasps again, and this time I got a scarf from a drawer to tie around my head. I threw on some sunglasses, too. Deep breaths, in, out, in out. Again I forced myself to walk slowly to the door.

  “Hey!” Aiden pointed to my head. “Love the Audrey Hepburn look.”

  “Who?” I asked.

  “You don’t know Audrey H? She’s only one of the top actresses of all time. From the ’50s.”

  “No.” I resisted browsing the Internet for her on my phone. Later. “How old is she?”

  “Well, she’s dead now. Probably in her late twenties when she did Breakfast at Tiffany’s.”

  I grinned. Looking like someone in her late 20s was way better than being called kid. I grabbed my bag, locked the door, and waited till Aiden opened the passenger side of his Mustang.

  “You in a hurry?” he asked as he started the engine.