Amish Summer of Courage: Book Six

by Samantha Jillian Bayarr

  Levi didn’t know why he was bothering to explain it to his father. He would only get drunk again and forget what he said. He stepped toward the doorway for some fresh air as he reached into his pocket and pulled out his weekly wages. As expected, Bruce snatched the money from his fingers and counted out the bills.

  Bruce snarled. “I don’t think that Amish farmer is paying you enough. You look tired from all the work. And this ain’t enough for me to live on.” He waved the bills at him.

  Levi walked out the door, and then turned to face his father. “Then I suggest you get your own job.” Levi tossed the cell phone at Bruce. “And stop calling me and texting me. You take the phone. I don’t want it, and I won’t hide it anymore. I’ll see you next Saturday.”

  Levi hopped in the pony cart and clicked to the horse. He knew it wasn’t right the way he spoke to Bruce, but he didn’t feel there was any other way to communicate with him.

  “What about my money?” Bruce called after him.

  “I’m working on it,” Levi hollered as he pushed the horse to a fast trot.

  The real Levi Schrock had told him over the past summer that he was to honor his mother and his father. How could he honor a mother who left him and a father who abused him? Bruce didn’t understand his son’s kindness—he never had. Maybe it was time for a little tough love.

  ****

  Rachel turned over the sign on the bakery door to let her customers know it was open for the day. She’d spent most of the morning making flower-shaped cookies and daydreaming about Levi. As she frosted the last batch of cookies with the variety of pastel-colored frosting, she heard the jingling of the bell on the front door. She poked her head around the side of the kitchen, surprised to see Levi entering the bakery. Her heart fluttered until she caught the expression on his face. He looked distraught; perhaps he’d received bad news from back home. She hoped whatever it was wouldn’t lead him away from the community so soon. Not when she had only begun to get to know him.

  She came around the side of the kitchen, towel in hand, as she tried to wipe frosting from her fingertips. “Gudemariye, Levi. What brings you here?”

  He looked at her cheerful face and her beautiful, smiling green eyes. That was all he needed to bring his spirit up.

  “I missed my breakfast this morning since I drove into town early. I was hoping you might have some fresh biscuits and honey. I’m starving.”

  Rachel giggled. “I hardly think you’re starving, but I’d be happy to get you something. Would you like kaffi?”

  “Jah, danki.” Levi felt awkward using the words he’d learned from the Schrock’s, but he already felt like his world was falling apart. He didn’t need to add losing Rachel too. He had to keep her suspicion of him to a minimum.

  Rachel motioned for him to sit at one of the small tables along the windows while she went into the kitchen to get the items for a small breakfast for Levi. As she poured his kaffi, she wondered what it would be like to serve him breakfast every morning as his fraa someday. Her cheeks heated. She tried to look down, but Levi had already noticed.

  He smiled. “I could get used to this.”

  His comment took her by surprise, causing her cheeks to burn with embarrassment. He took her hand in his and gave it a squeeze. A shy giggle escaped her lips, but she quickly straightened and leveled her expression.

  Rachel cleared her throat. “I don’t have any biscuits, but I have banana nut muffins. Would you like one?”

  Levi shook his head while he sipped the hot beverage. He let her hand slip from his grasp, but she allowed it to linger there. He cupped his fingers around hers again and asked her to sit with him. At her touch, his worries suddenly seemed to slip away.

  Chapter 19

  Levi felt funny sitting on the backless wooden bench during church services. It was his first one in this community, but not his first ever. Hiram had insisted Levi and Nettie bring him to the Yoder home for service, despite the doctor’s orders for him to remain in bed for another few days. Hiram had stated his case to the two of them, saying that he would take it easy after they went back home.

  Levi would never forget the day that the Schrock’s had hosted the service in their home while he was staying with them. It had intrigued him, and given him a hunger for God’s word. He’d sat on the stairs and looked over the service, witnessing how God had brought the families and friends together, and he had craved that unconditional love the Amish shared with their community.

  Now, as Levi sat among them, he felt as though he was betraying their trust. They had taken him at his word that he was who he said he was. Would his word mean nothing to them if they found out his true identity? He had been welcomed with open arms with no questions asked. Did he deserve their trust? Did he deserve Rachel’s trust? How would she react if she knew the truth? Would she reject his feelings for her?

  Levi glanced over at Rachel, who was sitting across the set of benches from him. She locked eyes with Levi, fluttering her long, auburn lashes in a flirtatious manner. He enjoyed the attention, sending her a smile of appreciation. His heart yearned to belong here, but who was he kidding? Being deceitful was not from God.

  Lord, help me to find a way to tell these people who I really am. Help me to have the courage to be myself, even if they turn their backs on me.

  ****

  Rachel couldn’t keep her attention on the service. Thankfully, Katie, Rose, and Abby all faced forward, and had no idea what Rachel was up to. If they had, she would surely have gotten a scolding from each of them—even though they had done the same thing when they had new love interests. Rachel, however, wanted to keep her relationship with Levi a secret since he lived with her grossdaddi. Keeping her relationship a secret the way all the youth did made her feel very grown up. Since her sixteenth birthday a few weeks ago, she’d felt no difference, but the possibility of having a beau made all the difference in the world.

  Rachel fidgeted in her seat, determined to face forward and pay attention to the service. She could see out of the corner of her eye every time Levi stole a glance in her direction, and it caused her to smile. Did he like her as much as she liked him? Since she’d turned sixteen, she’d been invited to youth singings by two of the local young menner, but those dates never amounted to anything. Levi was a different story. They hadn’t attended any of the usual youth gatherings, yet they had already developed a deep friendship in such a short time.

  At the conclusion of the service, Rachel signaled Levi with her eyes so he would follow her. She ran out of the haus before her mamm could ask her to help with the meal. Her mamm had Abby and the others to help. The kitchen was always too crowded anyway, and Rachel doubted she would be missed. She entered the barn and retreated to the loft, where she often went to think. Sometimes she would sit at the pond, but she was usually spotted by someone. Today, she wanted seclusion.

  Levi climbed the ladder to the loft and sat beside her, his feet dangling over the edge. “So this is where you live?”

  “Jah, it was our turn to host services. I’m supposed to be inside “hosting”, but my familye can handle it. Was our service the same as in your community?”

  “I’ve only been a few times with my cousin, but it seemed like it was the same.”

  Levi pulled her hand into his. “Will you have time to meet me at the dock tonight? Hiram is getting better, so Nettie won’t need me after I finish the evening chores.”

  Rachel smiled. “I will need to help Abby and mamm after everyone leaves, but I’m certain I will be done in time. Should we meet at dusk?”

  Levi pulled her hand to his lips and kissed the back of it. “Sounds like a plan. Should we get back before someone comes looking for us?”

  Rachel stared at him. “Can’t we stay here until everyone leaves? I’m not up for visiting today.”

  Levi rubbed her hand across his whiskery chin and then kissed it again. “I would love to stay here all day with you, but I don’t want to get you into trouble.”

  Rach
el smiled. “If I didn’t know better, I’d think that’s exactly what you wanted to do.”

  Smiling, Levi kissed her hand once again.

  “Maybe, but we are young. We have our whole lives ahead of us. Let’s go hang out with the old people. It’s their time now.”

  Rachel wasn’t sure what he meant by that, but she had an idea he was talking about her grossdaddi’s health. She hadn’t allowed herself to think about it much for fear that she would have to face life without him. She was not ready for that. She had made light of his poor health for a while, unwilling to think about him as old and most likely nearing his end.

  Rachel tightened her grip on Levi’s hand. “I suppose you’re right. We will have plenty of time to talk at the dock later on.”

  “And I can do this.” Levi kissed her hand again.

  Having Levi so near gave Rachel a sense of security she liked. She could be herself with him, and he understood her without much explanation. That was something she could see in her future, and it was enough encouragement to join the others—for now.

  Chapter 20

  After the shared meal following church services, Rachel was eager to get the dishes done so she could meet Levi at the dock. She hoped her aenti Bess, who’d left an hour ago would be asleep by the time she and Levi met. Her aenti had complained of a stomach ache before her husband, Jessup took her home. She claimed she intended to go to bed early, and Rachel hoped she would. Tomorrow being wash day, most of the women in the community went to bed early on Sunday evenings, but it was barely dusk and Rachel hoped the woman would be fast asleep by the time she reached the dock, especially since there weren’t currently any guests staying at the B&B.

  “Why are you in such a hurry tonight? I’ve never seen you wash dishes so fast,” Abby said.

  Rachel didn’t stop to look at her schweschder.

  “I was thinking of all I have to do tomorrow. We have a lot of wash to do before I have to go to the bakery to start Tuesday’s baking.”

  Abby snickered. “It’s going to be an even longer day if you stay out too late with Levi tonight.”

  Rachel felt her heart slam against her ribcage.

  “Levi and I are just friends.”

  “Any time someone says they are just friends with someone it means they are more than just friends.”

  Rachel pursed her lips. “That’s not always true. We are just friends.”

  Abby struggled to wipe the dishes as fast as Rachel washed them. “That’s how it started with me and Jonah.”

  Rachel broke her momentum long enough to stare her schweschder down. “That’s different. You and Jonah grew up together. Me and Levi only just met a few weeks ago.”

  Abby put the dishtowel down. “I see the way the two of you look at each other, and the way your eyes light up when he’s near.”

  Rachel narrowed her eyes. “Alright, I’ll admit I like him. But please don’t tell. Can we just keep it a secret between us?”

  Abby hugged her younger schweschder. “No one knows more than I do how important it is to keep a relationship quiet. Rumors and gossip nearly kept me and Jonah apart. I will keep your secret, if you will keep mine.”

  Rachel’s eyes widened. “What secret?”

  Abby smiled. “Jonah and I are expecting a boppli.”

  Rachel squealed.

  Abby shushed her.

  “Go and meet Levi, I’ll finish up these dishes.”

  Rachel squealed again and hugged Abby.

  “Danki. I’m happy for you and Jonah.”

  Abby smiled. “I know you are. Now go, before I change my mind.”

  “Why are you keeping the news a secret? Mamm and daed would be so happy to hear they are going to have grandkinner.”

  “We wanted to wait until the end of harvest to tell everyone so the familye won’t stop everything they’re doing to make quilts and furniture and clothes. You understand what big news this is.”

  “Jah. You’re right. Mamm won’t get any canning done because she will be too eager to start sewing. Onkel Seth will insist on making a cradle and rocking chair instead of helping with the harvest. I see what you mean. I will be happy to keep your secret, but even after you tell everyone, you still have to keep mine.”

  Abby smiled. “Of course I will.”

  Rachel wiped her hands on the dishtowel and kissed Abby on the cheek. “Danki. See you later.”

  Rachel ran upstairs to put on a clean dress and comb out her waist-length hair. The sun had lightened her auburn hair to a dark blond, and she really liked the lighter color. She was tempted to leave her hair down, but wasn’t sure she should risk getting caught with her kapp off. She knew that other girls in the community had done such a thing in private with their beaus, but she was still unsure of Levi or the rules of his community—or if he even belonged to one.

  Rachel crept down the stairs quietly, being careful to avoid the squeaky step. The sitting room was devoid of all familye, so she slipped out the front door, closing it quietly behind her. Once outside on the porch, she breathed a little easier. How did her friends manage to sneak out every night to meet their beaus? She figured they must have gotten pretty gut at it since she hadn’t seen any of them except at Sunday services all summer.

  ****

  Levi’s palms became sweaty as he paced the length of the dock over and again. What was he thinking getting involved with Rachel while he was there to do a job and get out of the community? The last thing he wanted to do was hurt her, and if she learned why he was really there, it might ruin things between them. He wondered if he should just do his job, get on with his life, and leave her behind where she would always be safe, or if he should take his chances and tell her the truth.

  Either way, she’s going to get hurt. So why not stick it out and try to help her through it—if she’ll let me.

  Rachel stepped onto the dock with bare feet. The smell of honeysuckle filled the humid air, and the crickets quieted their song at her presence. Fireflies hovered around the large oak tree beside the dock, and an occasional mosquito buzzed her ear. She must have missed that spot with Mamm’s herbal repellant. She’d been in too big a hurry to get out of the haus before she was caught to worry about getting every prime spot that the annoying bugs like to attack. Now she wished she’d taken the time to douse every inch. She hated the thought of swatting at bugs while trying to have what she hoped would be a romantic evening.

  Levi approached her. “Mosquitoes bothering you?”

  Rachel sighed. “Jah. I neglected to put Mamm’s herbal repellant everywhere. I was in a hurry and must have missed a few spots.”

  Levi chuckled. “I may have a little too much on. Come here and I will hide you from them for a minute until they get the hint and fly away.”

  Rachel wasn’t sure what his meaning was, but she stepped closer to him anyway. Suddenly, he scooped her up in his arms and buried his face in the crook of her neck. Instinctively, she wrapped her arms around his waist. It was nice being in his arms. She felt safe and loved.

  Levi sucked in a deep breath. “You smell very nice.”

  “That’s Mamm’s herbs from her garden.” With her face buried in his chest, her words came out muffled.

  Levi snuggled her closer. “I don’t smell any herbs; I think it’s just the way you smell. It’s beautiful—like you.”

  Rachel’s heart fluttered. Was she falling in love with Levi already?

  Chapter 21

  There was no telling how long Levi had held Rachel in his arms before a sudden splash in the water broke the spell between them. Levi looked out toward the water in time to see a family of ducks swimming into the center of the pond.

  Rachel giggled. “That scared me. I thought there was someone out here.”

  Levi took her hand and led her to the end of the dock. “Maybe we shouldn’t stand here like this in case someone does come along. I wouldn’t want anyone to misunderstand.”

  Rachel allowed him to steer her like a horse to the end of the dock
, where they sat down, letting their feet dangle in the water. What had he meant by his statement? Had she been the only one enjoying their embrace?

  Once they were settled, Levi lifted her hand in his and pressed the back of it to his lips. “Don’t get me wrong; I would love to stand there and hold you for the rest of the night, but I wouldn’t want to get you into any trouble.”

  Rachel nudged him with her hip. “We’re in our rumspringa, Levi; we won’t be accountable until we are baptized.”

  Levi cleared his throat. “I-uh-I know that.”

  “Has it been hard for you not being part of the community while you were growing up?”

  How could he answer her without giving himself away for the fraud he was?

  “I don’t know as much as I should about the rules of the ordnung. I only know what my cousin has told me while I visited him.”

  Rachel looked at him. “That might explain a few things.”

  Levi raised an eyebrow. “Such as?”

  Rachel’s eyes softened. “Why you stumble over your words, and why you don’t know how to do some things that most of us as Amish take for granted.”

  Levi nodded agreement.

  Rachel rested her head on his shoulder. “Your mamm…she was an Englischer?”

  “Jah.”

  It wasn’t exactly a lie. Just because he and Bruce were Englischers too, didn’t mean he wasn’t telling her the truth.

  “That might explain why she didn’t stay with you. She might not have wanted to adhere to the ordnung. Many Englischers can’t. They say they want to at first, but they find it is too difficult to give up the modern conveniences of the world.”

  Levi thought he could give up everything except air and food to be with Rachel. He wanted no part of the world he’d been raised in or the harshness that came with it.