“Look, Adam. I brought cheese, applesauce, biscuits, and blackberry tarts.”
He sat and took the chicken thigh she held out to him. “I think I’m in heaven. Great food and beautiful company, what more could a man ask for?”
A name. My own name. The ever-present thought intruded on his happiness.
Hannah’s smile faded at his audible sigh. “What’s wrong?”
He shrugged. “I just wish I could remember something about myself. It’s so frustrating not being able to.” He stared out across the water to the trees on the far bank.
Hannah touched his arm. “I’m prayin’ for you, Adam. It will all come back one of these days. We just have to be patient. Besides, even if you did remember, you’re not ready to travel yet.”
Adam rubbed the back of his neck. He could travel if he had to, but where would his memories take him? To a family in another place? To a job? Across the ocean to England?
One thing he did know: regaining his memory would most likely take him away from Hannah. That was something he didn’t mind postponing.
Ten
Hannah watched the different expressions dancing across Adam’s face. What could he be thinking? It must be so hard not knowing who he was.
Realizing she was staring at Adam’s striking blue eyes, she looked away. Today was the first time she’d seen him in the full light of day. His eyes were bluer than the clear Carolina sky. . .and there was something—something vaguely familiar about them. The contrast of his long black lashes, which any woman would love to have, framing his azure eyes against his handsome, tanned face was more enticing than a sapphire pendant. Adam’s hair, she had discovered, was inky black, not dark brown, as she’d first thought. Hannah ducked her head when she felt her cheeks flame. Her feelings for Adam ran far deeper than was proper for a woman promised in marriage to another man. Was it merely because of the bond created from her saving his life, or because he’d been so dependent on her, or was there more depth to her attraction?
“How do you manage to spend so much time away from your home without anyone missing you?” Adam leaned back on his hands. His long legs stretched out in front of him, hanging off the edge of the blanket.
“My parents have gone to Charleston on business,” Hannah said, thankful for the distraction from her errant thoughts. “The Reeds are returning home after a long while away, so I’m seeing that everything here is clean and in order. Michael is busy with the spring planting and doesn’t care what I do as long as his meals are seen to.”
“That’s quite kind of you to take on the task of preparing this plantation house for its owners. When you marry, your future husband will certainly be blessed having such a lovely and capable woman overseeing his home.”
The skin on Hannah’s face tightened. She hadn’t mentioned to Adam that she was to marry Jamie. Had one of the servants told him, or was he speaking in generic terms?
When he didn’t question her, she assumed the latter. The longer she was around Adam, the less appealing marriage to Jamie sounded. What would Jamie expect of her? That was something she’d never considered before. Would he expect her to stick to the house and do all the domestic chores her mother did? Would he want her to travel to Charleston every time he went? Most likely he would. Her days of living mainly on the plantation could be numbered. She plucked a tiny flower and twirled it in her fingers. The truth was she knew very little about Jamie Reed other than that he was handsome and kind.
I wonder what Adam would expect of his wife. Just the thought sent her cheeks flaming again.
“So what can you do besides clean, tend the wounded, and stitch samplers?”
Hannah sat up straighter. “I can cook as well as any of the servants—my mother made sure of that. I’m an expert seamstress and have sewn clothes for our workers’ children. I know how to keep books and can play the harpsichord quite well. I don’t mind at all tending the plantation, but I can’t say I enjoy city life all that much.”
“I don’t blame you for not wanting to leave. This place is beautiful—and so peaceful.” He smiled at her, his eyes warm. “So how about another piece of that delicious chicken you spent all morning cooking?”
She handed him another thigh and took special delight at how he seemed to enjoy her cooking. He picked up the last of the chicken bones from his plate and tossed them in the bushes. “So what would you expect in a wife?”
He shrugged. “The same thing as most men, I suppose. That she be sweet and loving, a good cook, capable of caring for the home and any children we had. I also think it’s important that she be a godly woman. I’ve been reading the Bible and am certain that I believed in God before.”
Adam’s wife will be a fortunate woman. Hannah leaned back on her hands and stared at the puffy, white clouds overhead and listened to his mellow voice. It lulled her into a relaxed, peaceful state. Her mind drifted, and she wondered what Adam’s children would look like. She envisioned cute, tiny versions of him with dark hair and remarkably blue eyes. She watched the children playing in the dirt. Three, no, four of them, two boys and two girls. One little girl with curly blond hair toddled over to Hannah, reaching short, pudgy arms up to her. Hannah smiled and looked down into the child’s sweet face. A pair of bright blue eyes stared lovingly back—eyes the same color as Adam’s. She sucked in a sharp breath.
Shaken from her daydream, her gaze darted over to him. He licked his fingers and stared at her with a strange expression. Hannah knew he couldn’t read her thoughts, but somehow she wondered if he knew she’d been thinking of children—their children. She jumped up and jogged over to the creek. Stooping down, she rinsed the chicken grease off her hands.
I feel as if I’ve betrayed Jamie. Oh God, how can I be promised to Jamie Reed in marriage and dare think about being Adam’s wife and having his children? It’s so wrong. Lord, my whole life long I’ve heard Mama’s plans about me marrying Jamie when I’m grown. I never questioned them before, so why am I now? Why did I have to find Adam? Why now, when Jamie will be returning soon? Maybe it was a mistake to take care of Adam as I have.
Instantly, she felt condemnation for her thoughts. If she hadn’t found him, he’d most likely be dead by now. The thought of Adam lying cold and dead on the Reeds’ barn floor chilled her. Hannah crossed her forearms and rubbed the goose bumps that had suddenly popped up. In a few short days, Adam had become her best friend.
What should I do, Lord? I can’t help the way I feel about him. I like everything about him. I hardly even know Jamie anymore. Please, God, couldn’t You work a miracle for me?
“Hannah, are you all right?” Adam had walked up behind her, and she hadn’t even realized it. She stood, drying her hands on her skirt, but she didn’t turn to him.
What could she say when her emotions were so raw? Adam’s fingers came to rest on her shoulders, gently kneading away the tension. “I’m sorry if I said something that upset you.”
“It’s not you,” was all she managed to squeak out.
He stepped beside her, keeping his left arm draped loosely around her shoulders. Why did that feel so right? When she leaned her head against his shoulder, he tightened his grip. She wasn’t sure how long they stood there in the quiet setting, serenaded by nature’s symphony. The gently moving stream rippled along, birds of all sorts chirped their cheerful songs, while unseen insects hummed their tunes. Hannah appreciated that Adam didn’t press her for more information. She just enjoyed the moment. . .because she knew it wouldn’t last.
❧
Hannah rocked in one of the four old wooden rockers on the front porch of her family’s home.
The barn in the distance stood out as a black silhouette against the evening sky, blazing with the brilliant pinks, oranges, and deep purples of the setting sun. Staring at the beautiful scene, Hannah raised the cup warming her hands and sipped the hot tea. The events of the past few days flashed through her mind as she rubbed the back of her neck with her free hand.
Even though Adam was
doing much better, leaving him each evening was getting harder. He had been a model patient. He’d stayed in the cramped little bed without complaining and allowed her to care for him. She smiled as she remembered the conversations they’d had about her family, the checkers games he’d trumped her at, and the times he’d rested while she’d read to him from the Bible or a novel from her father’s library. She had faithfully brought him his meals, and he’d rewarded her with his heart-stopping smile.
Hannah looked heavenward and sighed. Heavenly Father, I’m losing my heart to Adam. He’s so easy to talk to. So funny. So patient with my feeble attempts at doctoring. The way he looks at me—as if I’m the most precious thing in all of America—sends shivers through my body. I don’t care what his past is or who his family is. Oh, what am I going to do?
She stared up at the few stars bright enough to be seen in the twilight. Why had she always gone along with her mother’s plan for her to marry Jamie? Maybe because she liked him? But if the truth be known, she had always liked Cooper better. Cooper had been her buddy. He’d even written to her many times during the long years he’d been away, but Jamie had only written her a brief note a few times recently.
Hannah sighed and sipped her tea. She’d kept up with Jamie through the letters her mama had received from Heather Reed and with visits when she was home at Reed Springs. Once she had even asked her mother why she had to marry Jamie instead of Cooper. Mama’s response was, “He’s the oldest, and the oldest marries first.” Hannah let the comment resting on the tip of her tongue slide off unsaid. If the oldest is supposed to get married first, then why do I have to get married before Michael?
Wasn’t there a story in the Bible like that? Who was it? Joseph? No, it was Jacob. Jacob traveled to the land of his forefathers in search of a woman to marry. He found Rachel and fell in love. But after Jacob had worked for seven years for her hand in marriage, Rachel’s father tricked Jacob, and he ended up marrying Rachel’s older sister, Leah. Laban had insisted Leah must marry first since she was the oldest.
Rachel must have been heartbroken to have her sister marry her beau. Hannah shook her head. Too bad Jane hadn’t married Jamie, then maybe she and Adam would have a chance at a life together.
Rather than dwelling on things beyond her control, Hannah shifted her focus to a happy memory. A smile tilted her lips as she remembered Cooper’s youthful gallantry. On the day he left to go to sea as a cabin boy on one of his father’s ships, Cooper had handed her a wilted daisy and told her that he would marry her when he grew up if Jamie didn’t want to. They had been best friends. Why was it that the people she grew closest to were the ones to leave? First Cooper left—and now he’d never return—and it was only a matter of time until Adam was well enough to move on, too.
The door banged as Chesny walked out onto the porch. Hannah turned her face away and wiped the tears stinging her eyes. Chesny dropped down in the rocker next to hers.
“Tomorrow is the day yo’ mama say we oughta take her weddin’ dress out of the trunk. The Reeds, they be back soon and yo’ mama say they want to have the weddin’ right away. With a few adjus’ments, that gown should fit you jes’ fine.”
Hannah blew out a loud breath.
“Somethin’ wrong?” Chesny’s chair creaked a steady rhythm as she moved back and forth.
“What if—what if—”
“You ain’t havin’ second thoughts, are you?”
Hannah huffed out a laugh. “Second and thirds and fourths.”
Chesny’s chair halted, and she turned toward Hannah. “When’d that start?”
“I don’t know. Before Adam came, if that’s what you’re wondering.”
“Humph. I’ma thinkin’ that boy is a big part of yo’ doubts.”
She leaned forward and put her face in her hands. “I don’t know what to do. If I don’t go through with the wedding, I’ll disappoint everyone—Mama, Heather, Jamie—and they’re already distraught over Cooper’s disappearance.”
Chesny patted her back. “Now, now, it ain’t all that bad.”
“Yes, it is.”
“What you need to do is pray about this and talk to the good Lord. He wouldn’t have you marry a man that you’d be miser’ble with.”
Wiping her face, Hannah sat up. “You’re right. I do need to pray more.” She’d been so tired each night that she’d almost fallen asleep at supper, and in the mornings, she’d been so anxious to get over to Reed Springs to see how Adam had fared that she hadn’t had her normal prayer and Bible reading time in the mornings. That needed to change. She could hardly expect God to speak to her if she wasn’t seeking Him each day.
Eleven
Hannah pushed open the door to the secret room, her other hand pressed against her stomach, trying to squelch the tingly sensation. She felt as if a passel of lightning bugs danced in her stomach. In her devotional time this morning, she had spent a half hour in prayer, and her desire to see Adam again hadn’t lessened one iota, not even after she pleaded with God to remove the desire if it wasn’t His will.
When Adam didn’t respond, she knocked harder and walked halfway down the stairs. Israel had said Adam hadn’t slept well the night before, so perhaps he’d fallen asleep after breakfast. “Adam, are you awake?”
When no answer came and her eyes had adjusted to the dim lighting, she continued down the stairs, her excitement waning, replaced by concern. Had yesterday’s outing been too much too soon?
Adam lay scrunched up on the narrow cot, a pile of quilts on the floor. She picked up the covers and laid one over him, then folded the rest and set them on the table. He stirred slightly but didn’t awaken. She retrieved his cup from the table, filled it with water from the pitcher, and set it down again.
She had worried about him all night. He had been holding his side ever since she played that snake joke on him. That had been such a foolish act on her part, and she sorely regretted it. She allowed herself a moment to study his sleeping form. His large frame was much too big for the cot. Over six feet tall, he towered over her by a half foot. She remembered the day she’d massaged his neck and shoulders. His build was lean but muscular, the kind of muscles earned by hard work—and that work must have been done outside, for no man with a desk job would have such sun-kissed skin. She touched her warm cheeks, remembering the pleasantness of his strong arms around her that day the three men came to the house.
Would she feel the same inner delight if Jamie held her? She wished he was still in England—and that thought took her by surprise. When had she started dreading Jamie’s return to Reed Springs? She dropped onto one of the chairs and propped her chin up with her hand. Dare she call off the wedding? Her mother and Heather Reed would be so disappointed. And what about Jamie? Did he truly want to marry her?
He was twenty-nine now and surely ready to marry and start a family. She would be hard-pressed to find a man as good and responsible as he. And he was a godly man. But was he the right man?
Adam murmured something unintelligible in his sleep, drawing her gaze to his face. The bruises and cuts were pressed against the bed, leaving his handsome side showing. His chin was fresh-shaven and his hair gleamed like a raven’s wing from yesterday’s scrubbing. He was a fine-looking man with eyes that reached clear to her soul, but that wasn’t what drew her to him. He needed her—and a part of her needed him. She loved his quiet, teasing nature and ached for him to be reunited with his memories.
Reaching down, ever so gently, she brushed a lock of dark hair away from his face. The lantern light danced against his cheek. She stood next to him, admiring his tanned face and his thick, ebony lashes that lay in a half moon against his cheek. Hannah’s gaze wandered down to his healed lips.
Adam jerked his head sideways and moaned. “No, not again.” He rolled onto his back, his head tossing to one side and then the other. “Won’t tell you where it is.”
Hannah leaned forward to hear better. He suddenly cast the quilt aside and sat up, and his rock-hard grasp clamped
onto her wrist. Stunned, she yelped and attempted to jerk away, but instead of getting free, he pulled her toward him, and she fell across his lap.
With her cheek pressed hard against Adam’s stomach, held there by his strong arm, she gazed up at him with fear in her heart for the first time since she’d discovered him in the barn. The disheveled mess of his long, dark hair added to his frightening countenance. The relentless pounding of her heart abruptly stopped at the angry glint in his eyes and snarl on his lips.
❧
Adam held tight to the man who had attacked him. The relentless trio had chased him all the way from Charleston. They meant to take him back—or worse. He had to get away—had some vital information they wanted. He fought the fog threatening to suck him under and forced his eyes open. What he saw drove away all hint of sleepiness. Hannah was crushed against him, held there by his iron-hard grasp. “Hannah?”
“Y–yes, it’s m–me.”
“My apologies. I didn’t realize it was you.” He blinked his eyes and squeezed his forehead, trying to understand what was real and what he’d dreamed. “I thought those men were attacking me.”
“I can assure you, I have no plans to harm you.”
Regret washed over him as he realized he still held her in his tight grip. He gazed down at her and brushed her hair back from her forehead. A smile tugged at his lips. “The thought of you attacking me isn’t altogether unpleasant.”
For nearly a week, he’d wondered what her hair would feel like. He must have knocked off the linen cap she wore when cleaning. Hannah’s wavy mass of hair filled his lap and flowed over the side of the cot. He pick up a strand of pure gold and rubbed it between his fingers. “So soft. So lovely.”
He could feel her fervent heartbeat pounding against his thigh.
He loved her. He was certain.
Had he ever been in love before?
Secrets of the Heart Page 8
