All But Lost (The Gifted Realm Book 6)

by Jillian Neal

  Everyone chuckled and offered the Governor their congratulations. He’d been looking rather worn as of late, between caring for Mrs. Haydenshire, Abigail, the twins, and with all of the events leading up to Emily and Rainer’s wedding.

  McCoy showed just a few minutes late. He looked morose. Everyone had been walking around Vindico on eggshells the past few days.

  Vindico ordered everyone to his office and slammed the door behind them.

  “I just got off the phone with Fitzroy. He’s got some intelligence for us. We’re going to make a show out at the O’Ryan’s today. Then we’re going to see if we can’t get some real work done. I’ve got things that need to be taken care of, and I need Wretchkinsides ended now!”

  Rainer had heard this speech on a daily basis for the last two weeks.

  “Apparently Fitz’s guy that’s imbedded in the French Interfeci found out that our pal Dominic is coming to the States. He’s due in this afternoon, but I don’t know why. We’re going out to the O’Ryan’s mansion to fake a search. I have to make it appear to Marlisa that I’m looking to put Marcus back in prison. I can’t have Nic coming in and discovering that O’Ryan’s been released. He’ll put two and two together and figure out that Mitchell’s been helping us.”

  “In other news, Fitz’s guy also found out that Clarence Pendergrath is looking to be instated in the Interfeci ranks officially. He wants to follow in his old man’s footsteps.”

  “The rules for entry are a hundred thousand dollar take or you help with a hit,” he reminded everyone. “Kid’s barely eighteen years old, and I’d like to save him from himself if we can. Unfortunately, he hasn’t done anything I can arrest him for, and just knowing he’s planning something isn’t going to cut it.”

  “Is there anything anyone needs to tell me before we head out to the O’Ryan’s and kick the door in?”

  “Yeah, I need the afternoon off. Got a few things I need to take care of.” Garrett’s voice was distant and tunneled. Rainer turned to stare at him. He sounded sick.

  He watched the entire team grimace. Asking for time off, in light of Vindico’s recent mood, seemed like an incredibly stupid thing to do.

  Vindico’s eyes narrowed as he glared at Garrett hatefully. A heated staring match ensued across the desk between the two men. But to Rainer’s shock, Vindico nodded. Bitter realization seemed to warp his chiseled features.

  “Yeah, sure, whatever you need to do.” His tone bordered on kind.

  “Thanks.” Garrett gave him a single nod.

  The entire Elite team knew something was going on that only Garrett and Vindico were aware of, but no one had any idea what it might be.

  Fionna crossed Rainer’s mind. Garrett was one of Fionna’s best friends and the Angels had the afternoon off, but Fionna would never cheat on Vindico.

  “All right, we’re leaving in five minutes for the O’Ryan’s. Make it look good. We’re conducting a search and seizure.” Vindico never dropped Garrett’s gaze. “Let’s go.” He opened the door to his office. Everyone moved out quickly.

  Tests

  ~Garrett Haydenshire~

  Dan stopped Garrett at the door. “Hey, this is no big deal. Why don’t you go on and pick her up. Just take the day.” Absolute defeat perforated his tone.

  He stared at Dan, wondering how much he’d already figured out.

  “Yeah, thanks.” He moved towards his desk, but Dan caught his arm. “I love her,” he choked out in a desperate plea.

  Fuck, fuck, fuck. How the hell did you let this happen? He wanted so badly to scream at him, but he managed a slight nod, “I know, Dan.” He grabbed his car keys and left, refusing to meet any of the curious stares he was receiving.

  “Man, who is this for?” Will’s tone held no judgment; only deep concern as he handed the drug store bag to Garrett.

  “You can’t say anything to anyone, even Brooke.” He wasn’t accustomed to keeping things from Will. He wasn’t certain he even knew how. He’d shared a room with his big brother for his entire life. They were less than a year apart, and had been inseparable since birth.

  Glancing around the parking lot they were standing in, Garrett drew a steadying breath. “It’s for Fi,” he choked, “so it’s certainly not mine if it’s positive.”

  “Oh God, does Dan know?”

  “He knows something’s up. Not sure if he thinks it’s this, but he may.” Garrett held up the bag.

  “Hey, tell her if she needs anything…” Will offered instantly.

  “I will. You know I’ll take care of her.”

  “Yeah, Garrett, but you’re not the guy that she needs if that’s positive.” He gestured back to the pregnancy test he’d purchased for his brother.

  “She’s my best friend, Will. She called me crying. She’s a disaster. He’s torn up because she won’t talk to him. I’m not gonna let her shut him out and have nobody. If she needs me, then I’m there; no questions asked.”

  Will nodded his understanding. “He gave you the day off?”

  “I told you he knew I was going to get her. He knows something’s up.”

  “You want me to come with you?”

  “No.” Garrett shook his head. The last thing Fionna needed was someone else knowing that she was in a heap of trouble.

  “I’m gonna head to Alexandria, take her back to my place. Give her a little while. Maybe it’ll be negative.”

  “How late is she?” Will asked.

  “Two or three weeks. She wasn’t quite sure.”

  Will’s eyes closed in defeat. He shook his head.

  “I’ll call you later.” Garrett climbed back in the Highlander and headed to the arena.

  Regret washed through him. He felt badly having to ask Will to buy the test for him. Fionna Styler certainly couldn’t walk into a drug store and purchase a pregnancy test as that would effectively end her career.

  The entire Realm was under the impression that she was dating Garrett, so he had to play by the same rules.

  He parked around the back of the arena. He didn’t want Emily or Chloe to see that he was there or who he was picking up.

  Fionna appeared beside his truck. Her eyes were weak and heavy. Garrett was certain it was from the sheer number of tears she’d sobbed in the past few weeks whenever Dan wasn’t home with her.

  She’d tried to play it off when he was there. At least that’s what she’d told him the night before on the phone.

  Garrett hadn’t reminded her that Dan wasn’t only an Ioses Predilect, he was also a Visium Predilect, and that he knew perfectly well that she was keeping something from him.

  “Hey, baby.” He pulled Fionna into his chest, wrapping her up tightly. She began sobbing. Garrett felt the same bitter ache in his chest anytime he held Fionna tightly and let her cry.

  “Come on. Let’s go find out what we’re dealing with, okay? I’m right here.”

  A half hour later, Garrett paced outside of the master bathroom in his apartment waiting on Fionna to emerge. Will’s right. I’m not the guy that should be here for this.

  She slowly walked out of the bathroom. Garrett could see the test on the counter as he watched her crawl into his bed and curl up in her customary ball. He slid into the bathroom, quickly checking his watch. But he didn’t have to wait the recommended three minutes as the instructions had suggested. The plus sign was glowing a bright blue.

  His heart sank into his stomach as he tried to think of what to say to her. Offering up a quick prayer for help, he crawled into bed beside her.

  “Hey,” he soothed, “come here.” He unfolded her and laid her on his chest.

  Her tears fell in convulsive sheets as she sobbed against him. He let her cry, rubbed her back, and kissed her forehead. He let her hide away from the world for just a little while. He set his shield firmly around her.

  “It’s all right, Fi. I promise you,” he continually assured her.

  “It’s not all right. He’s going to go insane. And the whole freaking Realm thinks I’m dat
ing you! And I’m gonna lose my job!” She convulsed in renewed sobs.

  “Are you gonna keep it?”

  “I don’t know.” She shivered in his arms.

  Garrett wiped away another round of tears. “Fi, baby, you need to tell him.”

  “No… not yet.”

  “All right, but if you decide you don’t want it, please Fi, tell him first. Don’t do that on your own.”

  “If I do decide to not have it, will you go with me?” Her voice trembled in her tender plea.

  “Fi, baby, I will be wherever you need me to be. You know that, but,” Garrett choked, “I don’t think it’s an eitheror proposition. I know this isn’t how you and Dan planned it, but he’s not going to blame you and break up with you for this. He’s a good guy. You know that; you fell in love with him. You don’t have to decide between having him or having the baby. You can have both.” Garrett knew perfectly well that having Dan Vindico’s baby was in Fionna’s future, even if it came to pass just a little faster than they would have liked.

  “His dad’s a Governor, and his mom will freak,” she reminded Garrett in a terror-ridden sob. “So I’ve pretty much ruined his life.”

  Anger timed in his rhythms. “Hey,” he raised her chin with his hand so she was looking into his eyes. “You didn’t do this by yourself, Fionna. And you haven’t ruined anything. You saved him from the hell he’s been living for the last ten years. Give Dan a little credit. He loves you, and he won’t give a damn what his parents think. You are all that matters to him. Do you hear what I’m saying to you?” His voice rose in accordance with his fervor.

  “And what about Wretchkinsides? I thought if he knew I was with Dan, he’d kill me just like he killed Amelia.”

  Tension clenched his jaw. He had no answer for that. Dan was right. He would kill her. And this was effectively a disaster.

  “Just hold me, please.” Her chin trembled as another round of tears cascaded down her beautiful face.

  “Fi, baby, I will lay here and hold you for as long as you want. You mean the world to me. You’re my best friend, but Fionna, I’m not the guy that should be here right now.” Garrett wrapped her back up in his arms, cradling her tenderly until she cried herself to sleep.

  ~Dan Vindico~

  It was almost eight and Fionna still wasn’t home. She was with Garrett. She was safe, but her pulling away from him hurt far worse than the terror of her being pregnant with his child. He prayed that she still loved him and that she was just afraid to tell him.

  He moved around their home, desperate for something, anything that might give him some semblance of hope. His hands gently touched the perfume bottles on the dresser. He opened the drawer and let the silky undergarments slip through his fingers.

  Without thought, he walked to the bathroom but left the room darkened. He could see by the moon alone. He lifted the brown glass bottle of kukui and coconut oil, sent to her by her grandmother. Pulling the stopper, he inhaled deeply of the scent of her, but that wasn’t quite right.

  Not stopping long enough to consider the fact that he was probably losing his mind from fear and lack of sleep, he carried the bottle to the hamper, lifted the panties she’d worn the night before, and inhaled the perfumes together.

  The scent clawed at his throat. The need to hold her, to tell her that he’d figure something out, that he would make this right, ate at him.

  He returned the bottle and the panties and moved to the bedside table. He pulled the Browning .22 from the drawer and affixed the silencer. He slid into his jacket and pulled a baseball cap low over his eyes before he climbed back in the Ferrari.

  He stood against a massive oak keeping the gun down. The lights were on at the O’Ryan’s. Wretchkinsides’ Vanquish, the same one Pendergrath drove when he was in the States, was parked in the driveway. Dan waited. He’d texted Garrett and informed him that he was working all night. He knew Fionna would stay there. She didn’t want to see him anyway. He had all night.

  The front door opened at ten. Dan’s heart timed itself to his breaths. One by one. He could do this. He slid to the side and watched while keeping himself hidden in the shadows.

  Marlisa stood on the front porch with her father.

  “I’ve missed you, Daddy. Why can’t I go with you?”

  “Marlisa,” Wretchkinsides tsked as if her missing him was ridiculous. “I have work to do. This is quite an undertaking, dear. Stay here. I’ll get you when we’ve taken care of everything.”

  She shrugged and returned to the house. This was his chance. Dan raised the gun, but Fionna’s beautiful face swam in the tears in his eyes. Dan, don’t. Not like this.

  ~Rainer Lawson~

  Feeling Emily move beside him, Rainer grinned. “Hey there, baby,” he yawned and pulled her back onto his chest.

  “Ugh, this is going to be such a pain.”

  Chuckling, Rainer hated to agree. The Saturday that the Haydenshires were hosting a huge gala for Rainer and Emily had finally arrived. Most of the Senate was attending, along with all of the Angels and the owners.

  “The Angels will be there,” he offered her hopefully.

  “Yeah, but so will the owners and all the Governors, so we all have to behave.”

  Laughing at her outright, Rainer kissed her forehead. “I like it better when you don’t behave.”

  Emily grinned and nuzzled her head against him. “I can’t believe in just a few weeks I get to be Mrs. Rainer Lawson. It’s what I’ve wanted since I was four years old.”

  Rainer’s heart skipped a beat as he thought about the wedding and then about the wedding night. “I can’t wait.” He let his hands travel down her chest and across her stomach.

  “Once you marry me, then I get to boss you around for real.”

  Rainer cracked up. “Oh, so the last seventeen years have just been for practice?”

  “Yes,” she assured him through her hysterical giggling.

  In a quick move, Rainer turned and pulled Emily underneath him. He moved up her body until his erection was braced against her mound.

  She stopped laughing as a broad grin formed on her face.

  “You know, if you ever want to boss me around in bed, I would really enjoy that.” His voice turned low and thrumming.

  “Is that so?”

  “Oh yeah, baby.”

  “You know, when we were little and I made Logan marry us and made you give me a Ring Pop, we never played pretend honeymoon.”

  “Yeah, I’m pretty sure if we had, your dad would’ve put a stop to all of the play weddings.”

  “I know. So I was thinking we should play honeymoon now.”

  Rainer moaned. He felt himself pulse against her. “That what you want, baby?”

  Emily gave him a heavy nod, and his pulse raced.

  “We can play, Em, but I’ll tell you this much, if you want to play now, it’ll have to be quick, sweetheart, because we’re supposed to be at your parents in an hour. But our wedding night is gonna be nice and slow. I plan to see just how many times and how many ways I can make you come undone for me before I lay you down and make you my wife.”

  Emily panted. Her pulse raced as she trembled beneath him. “Rainer, I don’t want to go today. I just want to be your wife. I don’t want to wait anymore.”

  Swallowing down his own deep desires, he nodded his understanding. They’d been attending shower after endless shower given in their honor. It seemed each wedding gift was attached to advice that had been heaped on them in heavy doses.

  The press was relentless. They couldn’t seem to escape. They’d given up on even going to see their new home because they were constantly followed.

  News vans had shown up at the tux shop when Rainer and all of his groomsmen were there for the final fittings. They’d gotten shots of the tuxes. Emily had been devastated.

  Rainer and Emily had both seriously considered just going to one of the other Realm Governors like Patrick and Lucy. They could sneak out one night. All Rainer wanted was to be mar
ried to her, but every time he thought of all of the planning Emily had done and of her dreaming about their wedding since she was a little girl, he’d talked her out of going.

  “I tell you what. Let’s get ready to go, but tonight, I’ll bring you back here, tuck you up in our bed, and make you forget every hug, and piece of advice, and pleasantry we’ve had to endure all day.”

  Peaceful calm washed through Emily’s energy. “That sounds perfect. And after the wedding you’re taking me away for two weeks where no one knows where we are, right?”

  “Oh, yeah, baby. I’m taking you away from everything and everyone. Two whole weeks just you and me.”

  “I can’t wait!”

  “Me either,” he assured her.

  Thinking about hiding Emily away in the lap of luxury for two entire weeks all alone had been how Rainer had gotten through the Press’s relentless quest to find out everything they could about the wedding, and how he’d gotten through Vindico’s horrendous moods that only seemed to worsen with each passing day.

  Capture Time

  After Rainer had assisted Emily’s brothers in hoisting numerous tents up in the Haydenshires’ backfields and had watched the teams of caterers set up for the shower, he was being slapped on the back by Gentry Livingston.

  He’d been an acquaintance of Rainer’s grandfather. He still considered himself to be a major player in the Senate, though he’d retired from Iodex long before Rainer’s father had become Crown Governor and the constitution had been rewritten.

  Adjusting his collar and tie again, Rainer tried not to roll his eyes.

  “You’re making a huge mistake there, Richard.” Gentry wheezed and coughed all over Rainer’s plate of finger sandwiches and fruit salad.

  Deciding not to correct Mr. Livingston on his name for the third time, Rainer glanced around for Emily, who was giggling with her mother and Adeline as they watched him.