Ghost Club 1

by Deborah Abela

‘Were they both ghosts?’

  ‘The biscuit-stealing possum was real and very terrified,’ Angeline said. ‘The dalmatian was a ghost and a very good guard dog.’

  ‘On occasion, ghosts can’t be seen but will emit a smell.’ Grandma Rose winced. ‘Pleasant or otherwise. They can stomp around, open doors and windows, sing, throw stuff. Sometimes they can even change form. In fact, I remember when –’

  ‘Why are they here?’ Dylan interrupted. ‘I mean, there are lots of people who have died throughout history, but not everyone comes back as a ghost.’

  Grandma Rose shook her head. ‘That, Master Dylan, is a hotly debated question. There are, of course, those who don’t believe in ghosts, so to them the answer’s simple; but after years of ghost sightings and catchings, we believe that some people who have died simply lose their way, are curious or just want to cause trouble. But most are here because they need to resolve an issue: find a lost love, fulfil an unrequited romance, give a message to a loved one or even right a wrong.’

  ‘So most of this trouble is because of love?’

  ‘I think you’ll find love solves more troubles than it causes,’ whispered a man’s voice, deep and rich.

  Dylan turned to the right – where a moment ago there was no one. And now there was someone. A great, big, hulking someone who was almost transparent, glowing slightly and barely inches away from him.

  Dylan tried to speak. Tried to move. Tried to run for his life.

  ‘So you’re the new recruit,’ the man continued. ‘Welcome to the dead zone.’

  Dylan stared at the ghoulishly smiling face of a ghost with its withered, bloodless skin, unkempt hair and wild, piercing eyes. He could have run, he could have called for help, he could have tried to defend himself, but all he managed was . . .

  ‘Aaaahhh!’

  ‘What is it?’ Grandma Rose peered down the row of chairs through the dark. ‘Is it that mouse again? I’ve been having trouble with –’

  ‘Aaaahhh!’ Dylan’s face shifted between several different shades of terror.

  Angeline and Edgar craned their heads to see past Dylan. ‘Grandpa Huffman!’

  ‘I should have known.’ Grandma Rose stomped down the aisle. ‘Huffman Usher, what are you doing here?’

  ‘I wanted to meet the newest recruit. Be part of the official welcoming committee.’

  ‘You weren’t invited to be part of the welcoming committee. This is Dylan’s first day. At least wait until he gets used to everything before you scare him with that crotchety old face of yours.’

  ‘What better way to get used to being a ghost-catcher than by meeting the world’s most charming ghost?’

  Grandpa Huffman tousled the boy’s hair, which gave Dylan the eerie feeling of an icy breeze blowing through it. The newest catcher pulled his jacket across his chest and buttoned it up.

  ‘I’m not so sure about the charming bit,’ Grandma Rose crossed her arms and glared at Grandpa Huffman, ‘but you’re certainly an expert on being annoying.’

  ‘She doesn’t mean it,’ Angeline whispered to Dylan. ‘They’re mad about each other, always have been. She just doesn’t like to show it.’

  ‘Come here and give your old flame a kiss.’ Grandpa Huffman drifted out of his seat, closing his eyes and puckering up before Grandma Rose.

  ‘I’ll give you much more than a kiss if you don’t let me get back to my demonstration.’

  He floated back into his seat like an obedient puppy. ‘It’s true love. There’s no denying it.’

  ‘Sorry about that, Dylan.’ Grandma Rose raised an eyebrow. ‘Did I mention that some of the ghosts you meet will be a pain in the rear end?’

  ‘What part are you up to?’ Grandpa asked, nodding towards the screen.

  ‘We just finished with the classification of ghosts,’ Angeline said. ‘Where have you been?’

  ‘Paid a visit to the fifteenth century,’ he said. ‘It was fascinating but a little gruesome. Found myself in a town square about to witness an execution. Grisly things, so I got out of there quick smart.’

  ‘Did you know executions used to be like circus attractions?’ Edgar asked.

  ‘It certainly felt like that.’ Grandpa shivered. ‘But without the fun. There was even –’

  Grandma Rose cut in. ‘Before we’re interrupted any longer, it’s time to show Dylan the Ghost Club equipment.’ She led the way out of the cinema.

  Angeline jumped up from her seat. ‘This is my favourite part about being a catcher.’

  ‘Technology is very fascinating.’ Edgar followed next.

  Dylan went to stand but felt a cold sensation settle on his arm.

  ‘And that means entering . . .’ Grandpa Huffman paused for effect, his voice low and rumbly. ‘The Ghost Vault.’

  Dylan sprang from his seat and hurried after the others.

  At the back of Grandma Rose’s office, past a collection of buckets and several pairs of gumboots, was a ceiling-high shelf overflowing with books, small figurines and photo frames of her beloved grandchildren.

  Only it wasn’t a real bookshelf. It was the entrance to the Ghost Vault.

  After Grandma Rose pulled out a specific combination of books, the shelf moved like a revolving door, revealing a stone cavern tucked behind. Beneath a dome-shaped glass roof was the entire collection of ghost-catching equipment. If the office was chaos, the vault was not. Positioned on polished shelves, metal devices sparkled under small overhead lights, beside other shelves of photographic equipment, video cameras and sound recording devices. Along one wall, neatly pressed black coats with hoods hung in a tidy row, and leather satchels dangled from long straps. In the centre of the room was a shiny metal workbench.

  Edgar took a deep breath. ‘The beautiful smell of science.’

  ‘We’ve been gathering ghost-catching equipment from all over the world, and believe we have one of the finest collections for ridding unwanted supernatural pests.’

  ‘Have I missed anything?’ Grandpa Huffman appeared beside Dylan.

  ‘Aaaahhh!’

  ‘Speaking of supernatural pests,’ Grandma grumbled but then seemed to change her mind. ‘Actually, you could come in very handy for this part of our training. Come stand by me.’

  Grandpa Huffman sidled up beside her. ‘I knew you wouldn’t be able to resist me much longer.’

  Grandma Rose pretended she hadn’t heard and continued. ‘Some ghosts don’t always want to be found, especially the ones making mischief, so we need a few devices to make it easier to see and hear them.’

  She opened a drawer in the workbench and pulled out a small, rectangular device. ‘This will be one of your most important pieces of equipment. It’s called the Ghost Tracker, or Tracker for short. It’s fingerprint-sensitive and opens only for the owner. This one has been created from the fingerprint you supplied on your entrance papers.’ Grandma handed over the Tracker. ‘Press your thumb on the screen.’

  Dylan did so and the screen came to life with the message, ‘Welcome, Dylan.’

  ‘Now hold it up and scan the room. What do you see?’

  At first there was a blank screen until Dylan came across a red, human-shaped figure, who was waving at him.

  ‘Are you getting my good side?’ Grandpa gave him a cheesy grin.

  ‘It has a built-in Spectro-Thermal Scanner that measures the temperature in a room. If the temperature in one part of the room is significantly lower than the rest, or it drops suddenly, it may indicate the presence of ghostly activity. The Tracker displays that presence by emitting a red glow.’

  ‘It also works by measuring electromagnetic radiation flux density,’ Edgar explained. ‘AC fields, which are from sources such as electrical wiring, and DC fields that occur naturally in Earth’s geomagnetic field. But, most importantly, it measures c
hanges on the spectral field, which is outside the human energy spectrum.’

  Dylan frowned.

  ‘He means . . .’ Angeline began. ‘Actually, I don’t know what he means. I just know that the Tracker helps you find ghosts.’

  ‘Is that why it’s so cold in here?’ Dylan put the Tracker in his pocket and rubbed his hands.

  ‘Sorry about that,’ Grandpa Huffman said. ‘That’d be my fault. Some of us ghosts are lots of fun but we do tend to cool things down.’

  ‘The Tracker also functions as a ghost camera that records spectral energies other cameras can’t detect, and a GPS that gives you your location and creates 3-D diagrams of sites you are investigating. It’s a communication device, allowing instant access to all key members of the club by voice, text and face-to-face interconnectivity.’

  Grandma Rose’s face swept into an even wider smile as she opened a cabinet and retrieved a tray of water-pistol-shaped metallic devices. ‘But these are what I am most proud of . . . my Atomisers.’

  ‘Grandma invented these herself,’ Edgar said. ‘They really are quite an achievement.’

  ‘She even won an award for them at the Annual Ghost Club Convention in ’95,’ Angeline said.

  ‘She’s smart and beautiful,’ Grandpa Huffman added. ‘What more could a man want?’

  ‘I was pretty chuffed.’ Grandma Rose blushed. She chose a shiny blue Atomiser and handed it to Dylan. ‘These are especially good for eliminating pesky poltergeists or bad-tempered ghosts who won’t listen to reason and are only interested in visiting the human world to cause chaos and trouble.’

  Dylan turned the Atomiser in his hands. ‘This little thing can get rid of ghosts? How does it work?’

  Edgar’s eyes widened. ‘It releases a high concentration of subatomic particles that operate against the structural integrity of the spectral vision.’

  Dylan looked to Angeline, who shrugged and didn’t even bother to translate. ‘He’s very smart, so you just have to trust he knows what he’s talking about.’

  Grandma Rose smiled. ‘All you have to do is aim, pull the trigger and a blast of atomising energy will do the rest. It’s quick, fast and effective.’

  ‘It’s really quite something to see,’ Angeline said.

  ‘Does it hurt?’

  ‘No,’ Grandma Rose shook her head. ‘Oh, some of them complain and tell you it does. They leave with a scream that could tear your ears off, but we’d never do anything that hurts. It simply sends them back to the spectral realm where they came from.’

  She looked up with a sugary smile on her face. ‘Huffman, are you willing to be our test bunny?’

  ‘Maybe for a small kiss, my bundle of love.’

  The look on Grandma Rose’s face made her anything but a bundle of love and convinced Grandpa to stop puckering. ‘Maybe I’ll just stand over there.’ He moved in front of a bare stone wall.

  ‘Aim at Huffman and pull the trigger,’ Grandma Rose instructed.

  Dylan’s face was etched with worry. ‘You want me to shoot him?’

  ‘We don’t say shoot.’ Angeline shook her head. ‘We say atomise.’

  ‘And, yes,’ Grandma Rose said, ‘I do.’

  Dylan stayed where he was, unmoving.

  ‘You don’t have to worry,’ Grandma said. ‘It’s on the lowest setting so it won’t send him too far away. Just far enough that we can get on with the rest of our demonstration in peace.’

  Dylan turned towards Grandpa Huffman. ‘Sorry about this.’

  ‘Don’t apologise, young lad.’ He stood tall. ‘It’s all part of being a ghost catcher.’

  Dylan’s hand trembled as he lifted the Atomiser. He took a deep breath, rested his finger against the trigger and pulled. His arm jolted upwards from the force of the charge. A bright, powerful blast of energy struck the stone interior of the Ghost Vault, sending a spray of dust into the air.

  ‘Sorry.’

  ‘Can’t expect you to be perfect the first time,’ Grandma said.

  ‘It’s not your fault, son.’ Grandpa Huffman tugged at the cuffs of his shirt. ‘Even the power of an Atomiser is no match for my charms.’

  ‘Sometimes it helps to hold it with both hands.’ Angeline moved in close. ‘Keep your legs slightly apart and your arms stiff.’

  ‘Thanks.’ Dylan felt his nerves calm a little. He gripped the device firmly with both hands, stood as Angeline instructed and tried again.

  This time it was a direct hit. The Atomiser let loose a blast of bright light that sizzled through the air, creating a halo effect around Grandpa’s body. Dylan’s arms shook with the vibration and he struggled to keep his feet anchored to one spot.

  Finally, there was an explosion of smoke and white light, followed by small, floating particles of twinkling dust. And Grandpa Huffman was gone.

  ‘You did it!’ Angeline cried.

  Dylan tried to speak.

  ‘Congratulations on your first atomising!’ Edgar said.

  Dylan again tried to speak.

  ‘You did well,’ Angeline said. ‘It took me a while to get the hang of it.’

  Dylan’s voice squeaked with the horror of what he’d done. ‘Did I . . . kill him?’

  ‘No, you didn’t kill him,’ Grandma said. ‘He’s been dead for ten years.’

  ‘You merely sent him from this temporal sphere to another.’ Edgar’s explanation didn’t make things any clearer.

  ‘But . . .’ Dylan looked like he was about to be sick. ‘So we’ll never see him again?’

  ‘Oh, we’ll see him again, all right,’ Grandma Rose said. ‘Usually when we least expect it.’

  Dylan still looked as if he was having trouble holding down the small amount of popcorn he’d eaten.

  ‘It’s nothing to worry about.’ Angeline shrugged. ‘It’s like there’s this invisible wall that keeps the material, earthly world separate from the spectral world.’

  ‘A wall?’

  ‘Yes, and our aim as ghost catchers is to ease their way back to the other side of the wall, even though at times some of them can be difficult and need a little more than easing.’

  ‘So the ghosts can return to our side after they’ve been atomised?’

  ‘Yes, but it’s hard and many don’t,’ Grandma Rose said. ‘It’s like they’re in a maze and they have to find the right entry point again. If a ghost is being particularly troublesome, you can send them far, far away by turning up the power level – it will take them much longer to find their way back.’

  A soft melody wafted out of her coat pocket. She pulled out her Tracker and activated the screen. ‘We’ve got another one.’

  ‘Another what?’ Dylan asked.

  ‘Ghost call.’ Angeline grinned.

  ‘We’ll continue the rest of the demonstration later,’ Grandma Rose said. ‘For now, we have work to do.’ She unhooked three black coats from the wall.

  ‘Am I going too?’ Dylan asked.

  ‘Of course you are,’ Grandma answered.

  Angeline and Edgar slipped into their coats.

  ‘But . . . I . . . I already have a coat.’

  ‘Not like this one, you don’t,’ Angeline said. ‘Where is the call-out?’

  ‘Castle Koszmar, Darkton.’

  ‘Castle what?’ Dylan’s head swung back and forth, trying to follow what was happening.

  Grandma opened a cupboard and handed over three pairs of boots. ‘I’m guessing you’re a size five?’

  Dylan nodded and took the boots. They each put them on and laced them up.

  Grandma grabbed three of the leather satchels from hooks and gave them to Angeline and Edgar. They slipped them over their necks so that the straps lay snugly across their chests. The last she saved for Dylan.

  ‘You’re a
ghost catcher now,’ Grandma Rose said solemnly as she handed him the satchel. ‘Inside are compartments with all the necessary equipment for an initial visit. You know some basic features of the Tracker and Atomiser, and Angeline and Edgar will talk you through the other devices. Any questions?’

  ‘How did I get here?’ Dylan mumbled into his chest.

  ‘Sorry?’

  ‘Shouldn’t I have some kind of training first?’

  ‘The only way to learn is on the job.’ Angeline flashed a smile that said everything was going to be fine, even though Dylan’s gut kept telling him it wasn’t.

  ‘It’s better to get your hands dirty straightaway.’ Grandma Rose hustled them out of the Ghost Vault and swung the bookshelf closed behind them.

  ‘They’re right.’ Edgar led the way through the arched entranceway. ‘As Julius Caesar said in 52 BC, “Experience is the teacher of all things.”’

  ‘Plus, it’ll be fun.’ Angeline followed.

  ‘But I don’t even know –’

  Grandma Rose grabbed a set of keys from a hook on the wall and gently guided Dylan after the others.

  ‘We can talk about it more in the car.’

  Grandma Rose gripped the wheel of her sleek, red sports car. She barely slowed down as she screeched around the corners of the winding country roads that led to Castle Koszmar.

  Dylan sat in the back, the fingers of both hands digging into the armrest as the car swung like an out-of-control ice-skater.

  Angeline, who was in the front and didn’t seem bothered by the speed or the fact that they might be about to die, looked down at her flashing Tracker. ‘Endora’s sending us a message.’

  She opened a concealed compartment in the centre of the dashboard to reveal a small video screen above a control panel. She activated the message with her thumbprint and Endora’s face instantly appeared.

  ‘Good evening, ghost catchers.’ Endora switched glasses with another pair from around her neck. ‘What a fine night for a catching. Dylan, you must be very excited to be going out so soon after being inducted.’

  The expression on Dylan’s face revealed many things, but excitement wasn’t one of them.