Off Limits

by Jules Barnard

  Jaeger looks over and our gazes connect. My breath catches, and suddenly my heart’s humming like he wasn’t just talking to another girl, igniting jealousy.

  He says something to the brunette then walks toward us, his long strides eating up the sand. The girl stares after him, her face a bit forlorn, and then I don’t know what she’s doing, because my mind goes blank.

  Jaeger is shirtless, his broad, muscled chest and shoulders lightly tanned, narrowing to an eight-pack above low-slung swim trunks. His legs aren’t skinny like most tall guys, they’re proportional and well muscled, just like the rest of him. Even the vertical scar down the middle of his knee appeals in a rugged way.

  My heart hammers. Suddenly, it’s hot as hell out here, though my hands are ice cold. I smooth out my towel and dust off the sand the football splattered on me.

  Jaeger walks up and sits next to Mason. He leans forward with one arm on his knee. “Hey.”

  I smile. It’s all I can manage. He smells like sunscreen and something so yummy… I’m trying not to let it show, but I’m literally sniffing out his scent. I have issues.

  He grins playfully. “Been fishing lately?”

  There are several ways to interpret that comment. Immediately, my dirty mind goes to innuendo. “No, you?”

  He shakes his head and grabs the football Mason propped between his hand and the sand. Mason doesn’t seem to mind, since all his attention is on Gen, who’s telling him about the friends we’re meeting here.

  Jaeger looks over my shoulder to the barbecue section, and I do too. It’s still early and no one’s there yet. “Come on.” He stands with the football under his arm, hand outstretched.

  I reach for it and he pulls me up. “Where are we going?”

  “To toss the football around.”

  Oh shit. Shit, shit. “Uhh, probably not the best idea. I’m not good at catch.”

  Or sports, but no need to give him the dirty details.

  He glances over his shoulder, increasing the distance between us along an empty patch of beach. “I’ll be gentle.”

  Why do I translate everything out of his mouth into something sexual? I need to stay away from this guy. He’s messing with my head.

  Jaeger throws me the ball and I lunge for it, though, of course, I miss. I pick it up and dust it off, then gamely throw it back the way I always throw a ball—like I’m launching a grenade. I can’t help it. Gen has tried to show me how it’s done, but I can’t seem to get the hang of it.

  My toss lands a dozen feet from Jaeger even though he ran for it. He picks it up and stares at it, then turns and walks toward Gen and Mason.

  “Where are you going?” I call.

  He doesn’t answer. He keeps walking until he reaches Mason and firmly sets the ball beside him. Mason absently puts a hand on the football while he continues chatting with Gen.

  Jaeger turns and stalks toward me.

  Oh shit. “What?”

  He nears me like a lion preparing to pounce. “You’re not allowed to play catch. Ever.”

  My heart thrums in my ears. “I just need a little practice,” I say nervously, a combination of excitement and uncertainty bubbling inside.

  He shakes his head. He’s only a few feet from me now. “You need to be punished for that toss. It was pitiful.”

  My jaw drops, but instead of fearing the overgrown male stalking me, I’m turned on, and too curious to see what he’s going to do to care that it might not be right. I shutter my expression. “You are mean, you know that? Umff—”

  Jaeger picks me up and throws me over his shoulder.

  “Hey! What are you doing?” I quickly adjust my navy bikini top to keep my boobs contained.

  “Dunking you. That’s your punishment.”

  I scream like a little girl. “Stop! The lake’s freaking cold! Please don’t.” But I’m giggling, and he’s hot beneath my bare belly, and his arm is wrapped around the back of my thighs, making my skin tingle. My ass is bent in an unflattering position over his shoulder, flat and wide, and I don’t even care because I’m laughing so hard. “Jaeger, I’m serious. I hate the cold.”

  “You grew up here—you can’t hate the cold.” The sand disappears below us, replaced by clear blue water.

  Shit, he’s deep enough now that my toes graze the freezing surface. “I do—I do—please stop,” I say, but I’m smiling and I can hear it in my voice, so he must too.

  He glides me down the front of his chest, my breasts pushing up between us. We’re eye level, my legs submerged in ice-cold water to my knees, but I’m hot as hell. He’s warm, and we’re warm, and my breath hitches.

  The corners of his mouth turn up. “What will you do to get out of your punishment?”

  My gaze flickers from his forest-green eyes, downturned slightly at the edges, to his full lips. I want to kiss him. If I were single, I’d lean in and gently kiss the corner of his mouth, teasingly.

  I glance back to his sensual eyes. They’re darker and his smile has slipped, his chest rising and falling quicker than it was a moment ago.

  I swallow. Shit. I have to stop this. “Please don’t put me in the water.”

  He must read something on my face, because his brows pull together. He stares for a long moment, then bends over. For a split second, I think he’s going to dunk me, but instead, he curls his arm beneath my knees and cradles me to his chest.

  His mouth curves and he leans down and dips my feet in the water. I gasp, but he doesn’t drop me—he carries me to shore.

  Jaeger sets me on the sand. “You’re safe. For now.”

  I don’t know what just happened, but I think he sensed my hesitation and backed off. I’m glad of that, but at the same time, I’m not. I should tell him I have a boyfriend—if I still have a boyfriend; that’s still up for debate—but he hasn’t asked, or made an overt pass that would force the conversation. To say something now would be presumptuous.

  We walk back to our friends. Gen’s folding her towel, and I look past her to find that the barbecue pit is occupied. The people we’re meeting must have shown up.

  Jaeger’s quiet as I grab my towel and start folding it up. He’s got to know I’m attracted to him, but I can’t tell if his flirting is merely a wingman maneuver to keep me occupied while Mason talks to Gen, or if he’s seriously interested.

  Mason looks over. “Cali, I was just telling Gen about the party we’re having next weekend. You guys should come.”

  Gen glances up while putting away her things, and smiles. It’s not a tight smile, flagging me to come up with some excuse. It’s friendly and warm. Happy.

  This could be a good opportunity for her and Mason to get to know each other. “Sure. I’d love to go,” I say.

  Gen grabs her beach bag and swings it over her shoulder. We say goodbye to the guys and make our way to the barbecue pits.

  Halfway there, I glance back. Jaeger and Mason are jogging down the beach, passing the pretty brunette Jaeger was flirting with earlier. She’s off to the side, smiling his way.

  I don’t know why I care. It’s like some sick torture I’m putting myself through. I shouldn’t be attracted to him, but I am—and I can’t help feeling jealous over another girl who’s able to flirt freely with him. Which makes me feel terrible, because no matter what’s going on with Eric right now, I don’t want to be that kind of girlfriend.

  The barbecue is in full force, and I discover through conversations that a handful of Nessa’s friends are from the local Washoe tribe. One of the guys, Zach, is even a dealer I recognize from work. I continue to chat with Gen’s new friends, all the while keeping an eye on her over by the barbecue.

  Why?

  Because Lewis—the guy she had the spark with last night—is freaking hot as hell. And his girlfriend, Mira, is here with him. She’s a bombshell with shiny, long dark brown hair, and she’s been sending eyeball darts Gen’s way for the past hour.

  No joke, there could be a catfight. Gen’s at the barbecue talking to my dealer buddy,
and Lewis, who’s six and a half feet of deliciousness—he might actually tower over Jaeger—walks up.

  This is so much worse than Gen indicated. Lewis wants her and she has no idea.

  Lewis has been playing it cool for the past hour, but he’s been watching Gen when she’s not looking. Not good.

  I glance at Lewis’s girlfriend. Oh yeah, Mira has her eye on them. Nothing gets by that chick. She’s sipping her beer and standing very still, glancing at Lewis in between fake smiles with Nessa, who’s chattering on about who knows what.

  Tossing more chips on my plate at the picnic table, I mentally prepare to intervene if necessary.

  Zach steps away and Lewis hands Gen a hot dog. He leans down and says something in her ear, touching her shoulder. Gen’s chest rises, her body leaning toward him. I’m convinced I can see actual sparks.

  Casino Real World has infiltrated the beach.

  I glance at Mira. She’s not even pretending to listen to Nessa anymore. Nessa’s eyebrows pull together and she follows Mira’s glare. Shit is about to go down.

  Gen’s frozen in place, her chest rising and falling too quickly. She glances up, her expression serious as she meets Lewis’s eyes. They stand like that for a few seconds. Mira looks ready to wrestle Gen to the ground, and I’m a breath away from breaking up the eyeball sex Gen and Lewis are having, when Lewis’s mouth kicks up at the side and he walks away.

  Damn, and I thought my situation sucked.

  Eyes wide and unblinking, Gen scans the area and sees me. She says something to Zach, who reappeared a second ago, and hightails it to my side.

  “I have to leave. Now.”

  “On it,” I tell her.

  We thank Nessa while Lewis sips his beer to the side, subtly watching Gen.

  Oh, yeah. Gen definitely needs to stay away from this guy. She’s no match for him. With high cheekbones, a straight nose, masculine full lips, and a smooth tan complexion, he’s tall, dark, and delicious, and he wants her. No woman could fight that kind of attention.

  Gen squeezes my hand and I glance over. Lewis has her in a staredown.

  Damn, I wouldn’t be able to look away either.

  I haul her toward the car. When we’re far enough away, I ask, “You okay?”

  She nods, but she’s staring straight ahead and not speaking.

  “Gen, what the hell was that?”

  “Something that has to stop.” She takes a deep breath. “I won’t make plans with Nessa next time unless I know he’s not coming.”

  Chapter Seven

  Gen and I lie low over the next week. I run into Jaeger once at the casino while I’m working, and he reminds me about the party this weekend. I told him I thought we’d be there, but my first priority is to talk to Eric. I can’t stand not knowing what’s going on. Eric has avoided me for a month and I’ve had enough. I’m driving to my old college tonight, where he still lives, to talk to him.

  It’s Friday and I manage to get off early. Gen is letting me borrow her car overnight and I’m crashing at my friend Reese’s place near Dawson University.

  The drive down goes faster than I expected. That’s what happens when you spend the entire time trying to figure out how to ask your boyfriend why he’s avoiding you without sounding completely pathetic. I’ve decided it’s impossible.

  It’s dark out, but all the lights are on at Reese’s when I pull up.

  Reese has a serious boyfriend, so I don’t see her as often as I used to when we were freshmen, but we’ve remained close. Conveniently, she found a job on campus after graduation and still lives in town, while most of my friends have moved on to greener pastures.

  I knock on the door to Reese’s apartment, and she answers in black skinny jeans, heels, and a designer sequined top.

  “Bow-chica-bow-wow,” I singsong. “Going out?”

  She drags me inside. “Yes, and you are too.”

  “Actually—” I stop her, standing in the middle of her simple living room, which consists of a plain, muted brown couch and armchair, and a television. It always amazes me that someone as fashionable as Reese lives in a home without flair, but her roommate is down to earth and Reese’s aesthetic obsessions tend toward clothing and accessories. “—I was planning on finding Eric, then crashing early.”

  Reese’s roommate Elena waves to me from the kitchen, her dark, wavy hair pulled into a messy bun on the top of her head. She’s in flannel pajama bottoms and a ribbed tank top, stirring something that smells like beef stew in a large pot. My mouth waters. I wouldn’t mind throwing on flannel PJs, forgetting this whole confronting Eric business, and joining her.

  Reese studies my face. “What’s going on? I figured when you asked to stay here instead of with Eric, something was up.”

  “To be honest, I don’t know what’s going on.” Which means there’s a strong possibility I’ll be making a butter pecan run in the near future. After two years together, I’m pretty sure things are over between Eric and me. What other explanation could he have for four weeks of avoidance?

  “Okay.” Her eyes narrow. “So what’s your plan?”

  “Find him and figure it out?” Then eat my weight in butter pecan?

  I’m pretty sure I know what Eric’s going to say, but I still need to hear it. When your boyfriend doesn’t call for a month, doesn’t return your calls, and doesn’t appear to care whether you breathe—what was that ingenious book title?—oh yeah, He’s Just Not That Into You. There’s no sense in pretending everything’s okay, because it’s not.

  Reese drums her multicolored nails against her lips—are those rhinestones on the tips? “What do you think about going to a bar?”

  My upper lip curls. “Umm—”

  “I only suggest it because I’ve seen Eric out a few times. Some of my coworkers have run into him at the bars too.”

  Okay, that’s weird. I have no flippin’ clue where Reese works on campus. She’s vague about it. “Your coworkers know him?”

  She waves her hand absently. “Never mind that. The point is, you might have better luck running him to ground at a bar.”

  And doesn’t that just sound depressing? I have to hunt my boyfriend down to get him to dump me. “I guess that’s as good a plan as any.”

  A sad smile crosses her face. “Let’s try Big Billy’s. It’s the new hotspot on Friday nights.” She scans my outfit. “Don’t take this the wrong way, but… did you bring anything else to wear?”

  I glance at the baggy jeans and T-shirt I threw on for the drive. “Are you trying to tell me I look like crap?”

  “If things are as bad as I think they are between you and Eric, you should look hot. Make him see what he’s missing.”

  Hot. Jaeger makes me feel hot, and desirable, but my boyfriend doesn’t. Something’s wrong with that picture. “Okay.” My voice comes out shaky. When did I become this broken, pitiful thing?

  “So, what did you pack?”

  I pick at my T-shirt.

  She shakes her head and grabs my wrist. “Come on, we’ll raid my closet. My mom just sent a batch of new clothes from Rodeo Drive.”

  I forgot how rich Reese’s Hollywood parents are. This should be interesting.

  An hour later, I’m dressed in a black mini, a butterfly-style top, and five-inch heels, entering Big Billy’s. My old college town is small, but you’d be surprised how dressed up people get. The clothes I’m wearing are mild compared to the short, sequined ensembles blinding me.

  Reese and I squeeze through to the packed bar. We order Purple Hooters and beers, and Reese lifts her shot glass. “Cheers!”

  I gulp down the grape-flavored concoction, and chase it with beer that tastes like piss. There’s a special on tap and I’m trying to conserve money for graduate school.

  We move to a booth and it isn’t long before Eric walks in. He’s dressed in faded jeans and his favorite vintage 2006 World Cup T-shirt with an open short-sleeved button-down. He’s surrounded by a group of friends.

  I don’t feel the urge
to run and hug him, which is what I would normally do. Yes, he’s been shitty and inattentive, to say the least. I’m not happy about that. I don’t like the limbo our relationship has been in, but I’ve been telling myself that my attraction to Jaeger is because I haven’t seen Eric. Well, I’m sitting here, staring at my boyfriend, and I don’t feel anything stronger than fondness.

  What the hell?

  Without the bond of school connecting Eric and me, it’s like there’s no anchor and nothing is left. Was our relationship really that shallow?

  Reese stares at me from across the booth. She glances from me to Eric, but doesn’t say anything when I don’t go to him. In the meantime, Eric approaches the bar with his friends and immediately turns to a leggy blonde in dressy shorts that ride up her crotch, while his friends wait for their orders.

  Eric leans in and touches the girl’s thigh. A sharp burn sears my gut. Eric’s not here to help a friend hook up, he’s flirting to score. He could have broken up with me at any point and moved on, if that was what he wanted. Instead, he dragged things out.

  Suddenly, I’m not sure what we shared. I thought trust, at the very least, but this is bad. Is it worse than me flirting with Jaeger, though? I don’t know. I question everything—my actions, Eric’s actions—but after the effort I made to have this confrontation, the idea of walking up to Eric right now makes me want to hurl. I’d rather leave.

  I don’t.

  Eric and his friends take a booth a few tables over. He’s smiling at something one of his friends says as I approach. The friend sees me and elbows Eric in the arm. Eric lifts his head, the smile dying on his face.

  My heart squeezes. Despite everything, I thought Eric cared for me. He seems shocked to see me, yes, but also annoyed. Like my presence has ruined his night, and that feels like shit.

  This is not love or caring. I don’t deserve whatever this is.

  Eric slides out of the booth and grabs my wrist. “Let’s talk outside.”