Dare to Live

by S. B. Alexander

  “We can lift the chair,” Kody said.

  “Nah,” Kade said. “Let’s have Lowell drive that bad boy up to the front door. Less stairs and easy to lift him over the small lip of the threshold.”

  With Kody’s and Kade’s large builds, they didn’t seem as though they would have a hard time lifting my brother and his wheelchair.

  Relief shone in Lowell’s eyes. “Thanks, man. There’s nothing as embarrassing as having two big dudes carry me.”

  My glum mood waned. My brother was getting along with both of them.

  “Jessie,” Kade said. “I hope you’re ready for a hurricane with black pigtails. Raven is dying to see you.”

  Kade waved at Lowell. “Come on, I’ll show you the easy path.”

  I started to follow, when Kody caught my arm. “Are you feeling better?”

  No. Yes. No. It was official. I was one big mess. I didn’t know which way was up or down. “Yes, thank you.”

  He smoothed the pad of his thumb over my lips, slow and sensual. “Liar.” Then he leaned into my ear, his breath warm. “Maybe another round in bed will pull you out of your mood.”

  I giggled, blushed, melted, and sighed. I would have loved that. But I knew another intimate round with him would make me fall hard and fast. Of that, I had no doubt. I jutted out my chin. “Maybe we can have that dinner date. How about after the recording session on Wednesday? We’re still on to meet at Mr. Robinson’s house?”

  He edged back, grabbing my hand, seemingly frustrated. “We are. Let’s go before we take a detour to my place.”

  As soon as my skin touched his, something in me calmed. Safe. Protective. Mine.

  We trudged up the back deck and into a massive gourmet kitchen. I didn’t get a chance to savor the Italian aroma before Raven barreled into my arms.

  “You made it,” Raven cooed. “Mama, Mama,” she shouted. “Come meet my new friend, Jessie.”

  Mrs. Maxwell was inserting a pan of bread into the oven, looking as elegant as she had when she’d been in the hospital. Her hair was styled up on her head. Her cheeks were rosy, and her smile was as warm as when I’d met her before. “Jessie, so nice of you to join us.” Her gaze lingered on Kody and me, seemingly pleased to see us together.

  Raven wrapped her small arms around my neck. “Nana, she came.”

  Kody, Mrs. Maxwell, and I couldn’t help but laugh at Raven’s infectious attitude.

  A petite, auburn-haired woman with the prettiest blue-green eyes I’d ever seen waltzed in through the arched doorway on the opposite side of the kitchen. “What’s all the fuss about, Raven?” The woman beamed before she regarded me. “Oh, you must be the famous Jessie. My daughter hasn’t stopped talking about you for over a week.”

  Raven laid her head on my shoulder. “She’s not sad today, Mama.”

  My heart burst into flames at the notion that I had disappointed her when all she’d done was console me. I should’ve locked myself in the bathroom instead of crying in the cafeteria that day I’d met Raven. If I had, though, then I wouldn’t have met her or Kody.

  Kody rested his hand on Raven’s back. “Remember what we talked about? Manners.”

  “It’s okay,” I said. “Raven, I’m sorry I didn’t show up last week. I had a tummy ache.” Or more like a hangover.

  She planted her hands on my cheeks. “I get those sometimes from eating too much candy.”

  “Hi, Jessie. I’m Ruby, Raven’s mom.”

  I didn’t see the resemblance at all. The Maxwell genes were super dominant, that was for sure.

  Ruby collected Raven from me and set her down. “Give Jessie some room to breathe, darling.” She grabbed Raven’s hand. “Tell you what? Let’s go see Daddy, and you can tell him all about Jessie.”

  “Fine. But I want to show Jessie the new doll Daddy bought me.”

  Ruby mouthed, “Sorry.”

  I didn’t mind at all. I loved kids. I wanted at least two someday. I tensed. I couldn’t entertain any thoughts of kids, getting pregnant, the future, or a man because they all led to one thing—my mutated BRCA1 gene. I hoped if I ever had a girl or girls, I wouldn’t pass on that gene.

  Luckily, I didn’t have to work hard to forget when Kody placed his hand on my lower back. “Lowell should be here somewhere,” he said.

  “Mrs. Maxwell, can I help with something?” I asked.

  She stirred what looked to be a big pot of spaghetti sauce. “Not at all. Kody, introduce Jessie to the rest of the family. Dinner will be ready in about ten minutes.”

  As we wound our way through the kitchen, a somewhat tall lady came in. Her long brownish-black hair flowed down over her breasts, mascaraed lashes framed her grayish-blue eyes, and her berry lips split into a smile. “I’m Lizzie, Kelton’s girlfriend.”

  My eyes popped out of my head. If she hadn’t told me that last part, I would’ve sworn she was related to the Maxwells.

  “Jessie,” I said.

  She tittered. “I know. We all know. Right, Kody?”

  He muttered something under his breath that I couldn’t make out.

  I giggled, more out of nerves than anything. For a guy to tell his family about a girl had to mean he was somewhat serious, although I would have guessed that Raven was the one who was responsible for the whole family knowing who I was.

  “Mrs. M,” Lizzie said. “Tell me what I can do to help.”

  Mrs. Maxwell started barking out orders as Ruby came in. Suddenly, I felt as though I should have been helping.

  “You’re our guest. Keep moving,” Kody said, sensing my struggle.

  A small pain cinched my chest. I wouldn’t have minded being more than a guest.

  We found the rest of the family in the enormous dining room. When I entered, all the men rose, with the exception of my brother, who was sitting in his wheelchair next to Kross. At least, I assumed it was Kross since he was holding Raven.

  She wiggled out of the man’s arms, and he set her down.

  Roxanne would be extremely disappointed when she found out that Kody was the only brother that didn’t have a girlfriend or a wife.

  Raven bounded around chairs with her doll in her hand. “This is Candy.”

  “She’s pretty,” I said. “Just like you.”

  Raven blushed for a second before she pointed a tiny finger to a booster seat across from my brother. “Come sit next to me.”

  Lowell chuckled.

  “Bumblebee,” the Kody look-alike said. “Give Jessie some space to breathe.” He looked at me. “I’m Kross, Raven’s dad.”

  “It’s entirely all right,” I said to Kross. Then I regarded the other triplet next to my brother. “You must be Kelton, then.”

  Kross stood out with his muscular arms, but Kelton and Kody were not as easy to discern except for the scar I spotted on Kelton’s chin.

  Kelton winked. “The best out of all the brothers.”

  Kade, who was next to Kelton, slapped him in the head. “In your dreams.”

  Again, my brother laughed.

  I silently thanked God that my brother was having a good time.

  Mr. Maxwell sat at the head of the enormous table. “Nice of you to join us.”

  I felt as though we needed a bullhorn to communicate. Nevertheless, the room was elegantly designed with the massive dining table that accommodated at least fifteen people. A crystal chandelier hung from the ten-foot ceiling. A vase of fresh-cut flowers sat on a hutch behind my brother, providing a sweet aroma beneath the delicious scent of spaghetti sauce and bread that was floating in the house.

  My stomach grumbled.

  I allowed Raven to guide me to the empty spot next to her. Kody was on my heels for nothing more than to pull out the chair for me. Yeah, I could get used to this family and being treated like a queen.

  Once I was seated, Kody helped Raven into her booster seat. Then all the men folded themselves into their seats. Before Kody had a chance to get comfortable next to me, Ruby, Lizzie, and Mrs. Maxwell came in with platters of f
ood. Kade popped up and took the large bowl from his mother. She beamed with motherly pride.

  Voices buzzed as we filled our plates with food.

  Kody slid his hand over to my lap and squeezed my leg. “I’m glad you came.”

  I tangled my hand in Kody’s. “I am too.”

  When everyone had food on their plates, Mr. Maxwell asked, “Who would like to say grace?”

  “I will,” I piped up. “If you don’t mind, that is.”

  Lowell’s mouth dropped open.

  Mine might have too, but I felt connected to all of the Maxwells, and I had Raven to thank for barreling up to my table in the cafeteria that day to ask me why I was crying.

  “Very well,” Mr. Maxwell said with a proud grin.

  I took in a deep breath as everyone bowed their heads. I did the same, clasping my hands in prayer with no idea what words would come out of my mouth. Kody rubbed my leg, and as though he was transmitting magical powers, I knew what I wanted to say.

  “It’s not often that you find people who you connect with so quickly and easily. It’s not often that you see a family so rooted in the very meaning of what a family should be. I want to thank God and Raven for introducing me to all of you,” I said.

  “Mama, she said my name,” Raven whispered.

  “I’m grateful that my brother is here and doing well. I’m thankful that everyone, including Mrs. Maxwell, is healthy, and I pray that the road ahead is paved clearly. Amen.” When I lifted my head, my brother still had his mouth open.

  I snuck a peek at Mr. Maxwell, who nodded his head slightly. He was the only one at the table who knew my struggle.

  “You thanked me,” Raven said.

  Everyone chuckled as forks clanged and we dug into our food.

  “Lowell,” Mrs. Maxwell said. “Are you feeling better?”

  Lowell swallowed his mouthful of bread. “Yes, ma’am. Thank you for inviting us. The food is delicious.” Since Lowell had been home from the hospital, I’d been making sure he ate all of his food when I fixed dinner. I didn’t have to force him, though. I believed he’d gotten a wake-up call, and the fact that Mack was working for free helped to dispel some of Lowell’s financial concerns for the moment.

  Over the next hour, we ate and talked and laughed. As I helped clear the table, the men decided that a friendly game of basketball was in order.

  “Lowell,” Kody said. “You can be on my team.”

  I knitted my eyebrows. Lowell had dabbled in shooting hoops. We had a basketball net above the bay door of the shop. But he hadn’t played against anyone.

  He noticed my face. “It’s cool. This chair can go faster than these dudes.”

  “Awesome,” Kelton said. “Kody, Lowell, and Dad against, Kade, Kross, and me.”

  “Hey, what about us girls?” Lizzie asked.

  I didn’t have an athletic bone in my body, yet it sounded fun. “I’ll play.”

  My brother cocked an eyebrow. “Since when can you shoot a basketball?”

  I lifted a shoulder. “I can’t, but I’ll try.”

  Kelton smacked his lips on Lizzie. “Then you play on Kody’s team. That way I can steal the ball from you.”

  “Game on,” Lizzie added.

  Kody shook his head. “Kelton is the most competitive in the family.”

  I could see that without a doubt.

  “We’ll clean up later,” Mrs. Maxwell said. “Ruby and Raven, let’s grab a chair on the deck and watch the show.”

  I followed Kody as he ushered Lowell out the front door, while the rest of the group trekked through the kitchen.

  Once we were gathered outside, cars were quickly moved either into the garage or around to the side. Then Kelton sauntered out of the garage with a basketball. We took turns shooting baskets.

  Lowell tried, but the ball didn’t quite make the height of the net. “I’ll pass a lot,” he said to Kody and his teammates.

  When it was my turn to shoot, I pushed the ball upward from my chest. The ball hit the backboard and bounced back. No one said anything, but I wouldn’t have cared if they did.

  After everyone had taken a turn, the game started.

  My brother passed the ball to Kody, who flipped it to Mr. Maxwell, who then passed the ball to Lizzie. Kelton tried to slap the ball out of her hand, but she managed to dart around him then went in and made the layup.

  “Good one, Lizzie,” Kody said.

  She stuck out her tongue at Kelton.

  My brother was guarding Kade, which was comical since Lowell kept speeding toward the six-foot Maxwell and bumping him with his wheelchair. Kade just moved out of the way.

  Raven was shouting, “Shoot, Daddy.”

  But Kross didn’t have the ball. Ruby and Mrs. Maxwell snickered.

  Then Kade tossed the ball to me, and I froze. Kody skirted around Kelton, and as he did, a loud engine rumbled in the distance. I knew the sound of a Harley well. Everyone on the court stopped playing and directed their attention toward the road.

  Lowell whipped his head at me. My heart sank as I gripped the ball between my palms. When Mack came into view, my first thought was oh shit until he started swerving as though he were drunk. That oh shit turned into no fucking way.

  The closer he got, the more my heart jumped out of my throat.

  Chapter 17

  Kody

  Donovan was on a collision course with us and the garage. His eyes were heavy as though he were about to pass out.

  “Get out of the way,” I shouted above the engine. I grabbed Jessie just as Mack wobbled.

  My dad reached out to take hold of a handle, but Mack swatted at him. When he did, he lost control. The motorcycle and Mack went down. The bike skidded until it came to a stop underneath the bed of Kade’s truck, which was parked inside the garage.

  Unfortunately, Mack’s shoulder took the impact before his head bounced once on the pavement.

  Jessie screamed as she wiggled out of my hold. At first, I thought she would run to Mack. Instead, she bolted over to the bike and cut the engine. Lowell was parked next to Kelton and Kross at the foot of the stairs as the rest of my family watched in horror from the deck, even Raven. I was about to kill Mack for scaring the fuck out of my niece and my mother.

  My dad helped Mack to his feet. “Young man, you smell of booze, and you’re bleeding.”

  Blood ran down the side of Donovan’s temple.

  “Honey, can you get the first-aid kit?” Dad asked Mom without looking at her. “Kelton, get a lawn chair.”

  Kelton dove into action.

  A turbulent storm plagued Jessie’s pretty face as she stood by the Harley.

  With my fists at my sides, I slowly made my way over to Jessie, trying like a motherfucker not to go ape shit on Donovan.

  Once Kelton produced the lawn chair, Dad gently pushed Mack into it. My mom came out of the house with a first-aid kit and a glass of water. She was about to hand the glass to Mack, when he flew off the chair, his arms violent as he knocked my mom backward. She stumbled, and I dove, trying to catch her so she wouldn’t fall.

  The girls screeched. Glass broke.

  Lowell sped over to my mom and blocked her fall just as Dad, my brothers, and me swarmed her.

  Mack swayed as he rushed for Jessie. “You belong with me.”

  Jessie punched him in the chest. “You’re an idiot. You don’t drink and get on a motorcycle.”

  Mack grasped her arm. She sucked in a breath.

  Appearing a little frazzled, Dad eased Mom down into the lawn chair.

  I stalked over to Donovan. “Get your hands off her.”

  He spun around and punched me in the jaw. The adrenaline filling every pore of my body suppressed the pain. I listed before I tackled him to the ground. I was about to unleash all the strength I had to beat his face in until I heard my mom’s voice.

  “Kody, he can’t help his actions. He’s drunk,” she said in a firm voice.

  I shook with raw need to end this guy once and for all.
She didn’t know what he’d done to me. She’d been in a mental health facility when I landed in the hospital. My old man hadn’t wanted to tell her anything for fear her depression would worsen.

  Hands gripped my shoulders from behind. “Bro,” Kade said. “Another time.” His voice was extremely low. No doubt he didn’t want to upset Mom.

  I hopped to my feet, leaving Mack to stumble to his. He wobbled into Jessie, and she steadied him.

  Lowell powered over to her and Mack. “Dude, we’ll take you home.”

  Mack bared his teeth at me.

  I had the urge to do the same, but Kade was right. The last thing I wanted to do was upset my mom, my niece, or anyone else. But the feud between Donovan and I wasn’t over, not by a long shot. We would end our dispute once and for all. I wasn’t sure how yet. If you just let Jessie go, then your Donovan problem would go away. I silently roared with laughter. I’d always been afraid that the next girl I fell for would die too. Maybe I was wrong. Maybe I would lose her because I couldn’t forgive Donovan for what he’d done to me.

  I needed space. I needed to collect myself. I stormed past my family and into the house. I poured a glass of water when I should have been downing a bottle of whiskey. No sooner had I finished the water, than Jessie prowled into the kitchen, tentative and wary.

  “Kody, I’m sorry,” she said in a small voice.

  My knuckles were white around the glass. “Why? Did you tell Donovan to show up here?” My tone was all kinds of mean.

  She crossed her arms over her chest as she settled in front of me. “Of course not.”

  “Then don’t apologize for the asshole.”

  Her bottom lip trembled. “Lowell and I are taking Mack home. I had a great time up until—”

  I planted my lips on hers then pushed my tongue into her mouth. I shouldn’t have. I should’ve walked away—far, far away. She was all wrong for me. As long as I kept seeing her, I would also have to see Donovan, and that was a recipe for another hospital stay. Plus, Donovan had feelings for her. He had a history with her. I’d had one night with her, yet I wanted so much more.

  Once she melted into my arms, her coconut scent swirled around us, creating a cocoon that I didn’t want to break. We kissed as though it was our last until she pressed her fingers into my chest and gently pushed away. I almost whimpered.