If the Stars Fall
Page 16
Frank studied him in silence, his expression thoughtful. "That's one lesson. One day you're going to have a son or a daughter, and you'll learn another one. When a man is the sort of father he should be there is no choice. You just love."
'Til the Day I Die
Jared stood to one side of the platform under an oak tree in their backyard, facing away from the house. Deep in the shadow, out of sight from their guests, he knew Alex waited on the other side of the platform. He desperately wanted to see him. The day had passed in a blur of activity, but at the same time had dragged on forever. They hadn't so much as talked on the phone. Jared tried to remember the last time they'd gone a day without contact and realized he couldn't. When Alex had been unconscious in the hospital, he'd been there, holding his hand. Now, on the most important day of their lives, he hadn't seen Alex at all.
He tried to distract himself by watching the guests filter in, but doing so only made him curious about where so many people had come from. They'd run out of programs and the cute umbrellas Vlad had ordered as memorabilia for the occasion. The chairs were filled, and even with only room to stand remaining, people continued to arrive. Jared wondered if they'd have enough room for them all to fit in the yard. It looked like every person either of them had ever had contact with had shown up for the ceremony.
The sounds of the caterer setting up to cook the reception dinner drew Jared's attention away from the crowd. The diversion was a welcome one since the idea of standing forward and proclaiming his love in front of so many people, made his stomach clench and his mouth go dry. Justin and Clark had set up a bandstand where his and Alex's workshop would one day stand. They'd made a dance floor with a roll of wood-grain linoleum. Lights were strung over it, the bare bulbs giving it the look of a country hoedown. Nearby, a huge tent had been erected, chairs and tables arranged under it in anticipation of their sit-down reception. Multitudes of tiny white lights were strung under the roof of the tent, creating the illusion of dining under a star-lit sky. Fear of rain kept them from eating under the real sky, brilliant planning on Vlad's part, considering the heavy cloud cover hid any sign of the moon or stars.
The smell of burning charcoal tickled Jared's nose as the fires were lit in preparation for dinner. Salad, steak, and baked potatoes were on the menu with cake for dessert, of course. A buffet of finger food and dessert would be set up when the dancing began. Having decided against a honeymoon, he and Alex planned to party well into the night with family and friends.
The branches of the oak tree were filled with more of the tiny white lights and a floodlight illuminated the stage front and center. He would stand there with Alex in a few minutes and say the words to bind them together legally, a different kind of commitment than the purely emotional one they'd shared up to that moment. Jared patted his pocket to assure he had both the ring and his vows. He took a deep breath, ready for the ceremony to begin, eager to see Alex.
The breeze shifted and brought him the softer scent of the hydrangeas. They were packed around the bottom of the tree and lined the back of the platform. The flowers were everywhere, filling empty spaces and pleasing the eye. Carol had proven ingenious at arranging the blooms, and he couldn't wait to see what Foretta had done with the cake.
Soft music began to play, the hum of conversation died down and Jared realized with a start they were about to begin. The young minister, 'call me Brother Don', from a local chapter of the United Church of Christ, took his place center stage. The wedding party filed down the aisle between the guests, then split to stand on either side of the platform. Jared and Alex had decided against traditional bridesmaids and groomsmen, calling the friends chosen to stand up with them simply the wedding party. Clark and Stevie and their kids, a couple of Alex's doctors, some of the guys from work, a friend of Jared's father. The members of the wedding party had drawn names to find out whose 'side' they'd stand on.
The procession went smoothly. The men wore dark tuxedos and the women flattering floor-length dresses the exact color of the blue hydrangeas lining the aisle. Little Rachel walked with them, clutching Annie's hand and dropping petals from a basket hanging from her wrist. Alex and Jared didn't intend to walk up the aisle but Annie had told Rachel about flower girls and she wanted to be one. Jared smiled indulgently as he watched them approach, thankful beyond words for the friends who had become his family.
They all took their places, and Clark settled on the edge of the platform with his guitar in his lap. The first notes of "Marry Me" filled the air and the low murmurs in the audience switched to an expectant silence. Jared's stomach knotted and his palms grew damp. He resisted the urge to wipe his hands on his tuxedo pants. He and Alex had practiced with Clark to get the timing right. Drawing a deep breath, he stepped out of the shadow and into the light. On the other side of the platform, Alex appeared at the same moment and their eyes locked. Jared's doubts and worries fell away as if they'd never existed. In unison they stepped up onto the low platform and walked towards one other until they came to a stop in front of the minister.
Jared couldn't hold back his grin at the sight of Alex. He'd shaved. He reached out and laid his fingers against Alex's neck. His pulse beat rapidly under Jared's touch as he traced the familiar line of his jaw with his thumb. Alex looked younger without the beard, not like a boy, but more like himself and Jared trembled with the effort to keep from pulling him into his arms. He had trimmed his hair for the occasion as well, but instead of reverting to his professional look, his dark hair curled over his forehead, ears, and collar. He looked exactly the way Jared liked him best and he had no doubt Alex's jaw wasn't the only place he'd removed hair. He closed his eyes and took a calming breath, and then another. He could think later about stripping Alex down to his smooth bare skin and licking him all over.
As the last notes of the song faded away, Jared won back his control. He breathed a sigh of relief, and opened his eyes. He dropped his hand to his side and they turned together to face Brother Don.
"Who stands in witness of this union?" the minister asked the audience at large. Alex's parents and Jared's mother rose.
"We do," three parents answered in unison.
Jared shared a smile with his mother, and Alex beamed at his parents. Frank glanced over at Janet with more affection than Jared had ever seen between them.
Janet stepped forward. "Alex, Jared, you were young when you met but you've grown into men of honor. The years have proven not only the depth of your love, but the strength of your commitment to one another as well. We are here today to support your decision to validate that love and commitment by joining your lives together under the laws of God and man."
Jared squeezed Alex's hand when it slipped into his. There were no words to express what it meant for Janet to stand and speak for them in public. Thank you. Jared mouthed the words to her and she nodded in acknowledgement before stepping back with the others.
The minister smiled his approval as Jared and Alex turned back to face him.
"We are gathered here today to celebrate the love of Alexander Ross and Jared Douglas as they unite their lives in holy matrimony. This ceremony is more than a symbol of their love for one another and their intent to remain together, it is a sacred pledge before God to cleave one to another and a legally binding decision to join all aspects of their lives."
Brother Don paused and Xander and Jay stepped forward. Coming to a stop side by side at the edge of the platform, they smiled nervously at Jared and Alex. Jared gave them an encouraging look in return. They were scared to death of singing unaccompanied in front of the audience and no one had anticipated such a crowd.
"They look great." Alex leaned to whisper in his ear and Jared had to agree.
Standing slim, straight, and tall in their black tuxedos, the boys looked more mature than their tender age of sixteen. They stood silently together for a moment looking out over the audience and took twin breaths to steady themselves before beginning to sing.
Their a cappella duet of
"A Moment Like This" was so beautiful Jared didn't know if he'd ever be able to listen to Kelly Clarkson sing it again. His eyes caught Alex's and he lost himself in them as the words swelled and he gazed at the man he loved. He wondered if he would ever get over the little shock of surprise he sometimes felt when struck anew by the realization Alex had chosen him.
Jay and Xander finished and stepped back to their places. Jared didn't notice, still staring at Alex in wonder. Brother Don cleared his throat, bringing them back to reality. Jared's cheeks colored slightly and Alex gave a little embarrassed laugh.
With an indulgent smile the minister continued the ceremony. "While some who enter into this holy estate choose to give traditional vows that have passed down through generations, every love is unique. In keeping with the individuality of their love, Alex and Jared have chosen to write their own vows. Alex, please present your promise to Jared."
Jared watched with affection when Alex bit his lip, fumbling a sheet of paper out of his pocket. His mouth twitched when Alex didn't look at it before shoving it back into his pocket. It reassured him to know Alex shared his case of the nerves.
Alex cleared his throat and glanced out at their guests. "When Jared and I decided to write our own vows, I thought it'd be easy. I carved an hour out of my day and sat down to write, before I knew it my hour had turned to three and I had pages filled with everything I wanted to say, all the things I love about Jared, everything he means to me. Hours and pages and I hadn't scratched the surface. That's when I realized the impossibility of my task. I understand why people choose traditional vows and why so many of the original ones I read seem inadequate."
Alex turned his gaze back to Jared, taking a slight step closer. Jared's breath caught at the intensity in his eyes. "There's something we've talked about a few times. What influences in a person's life turns them in one direction or another. It's an age-old question, and I can only guess the answer to be different for everyone. Perhaps most people have no idea what or who shaped their lives. But I know." Alex chewed his bottom lip and his eyes dropped away from Jared's.
Reaching out, Jared captured his hands, and after a second Alex lifted his gaze from the floor. Jared smiled encouragement. Alex smiled tremulously in return, his fingers tightened on Jared's.
"Jared Douglas, you were the making of this man and I promise to love you for all time. I will be yours if the world stops spinning and the stars fall."
Jared's heart lurched, his hands clutched Alex's, and the lights went out. Their guests gasped with shock in the sudden darkness, and a couple of children sobbed. Jared couldn't see a thing and then a different group of lights lit in branches overhead. They dripped from the branches like stars falling from the sky. It took every ounce of Jared's control to keep from catching Alex up in his arms and kissing him breathless.
Exchanging a grin of delight with Alex as their guests clapped and exclaimed with enchantment, he feared everyone would find his promises dry and boring. He reminded himself Alex would get it and nothing else mattered. Another light came on, illuminating the platform enough to see without distracting from the beauty of Alex's illusion of falling stars.
Silence fell over the crowd as Jared dug in his pockets. He pulled out a scrap of paper and pressed it into Alex's hand. He glanced up at Jared, his expression puzzled before returning his attention to the note. Alex unfolded the paper and stared at it so long Jared started to worry about the dim lighting. It would be bad if he couldn't see to read. Without looking up Alex read aloud in his clear voice.
"I give myself."
Jared had the next scrap ready. He placed it into his hands and saw his fingers tremble when he opened it. Alex didn't say anything for a long moment; the guests began to shift restlessly before he finally read the message, his voice less steady.
"I promise forever."
His bottom lip caught between his teeth, Alex looked up and seemed not to notice when Jared put another slip of paper into his hands. Then his fingers fisted closed on it. Jared gave him a small nod. Alex made an attempt to smile before dropping his gaze to the open note. He frowned, and bewildered, looked back up, the blank scrap of paper clutched in his hand.
Jared cupped Alex's jaw in his palm, fingers stroking his cheek over the scar.
"I love you."
The words were barely out of his mouth before Alex threw himself at him in a way he hadn't since he'd been a teen. He wrapped his legs around Jared's waist, hands buried in his hair. Jared staggered under the unexpected assault but didn't fall. One hand moved to support Alex's bottom and the other cupped the back of his head as their lips met and their guests cheered.
"Oh!" Jared heard Annie exclaim. "Are they married?"
Clark laughed. "Honey, this is all a formality. Those two have been as good as married since they laid eyes on each other."
The truth of Clark's words rang in Jared's heart as he found the willpower to urge Alex to put his feet back on the ground. But dignity be damned, he refused to let go of him again and they clung together, leaning against each other, unwilling to be more than a breath apart. They faced the minister.
Grinning from ear to ear, Brother Don motioned for quiet. "Not done yet, folks," he reminded everyone. "The rings, please." He waited as Jared and Alex fished them out of their pockets and placed them in the minister's outstretched hand, small bands of white gold adorned only with the same braided edge decorating their engagement rings.
"These rings are an outward symbol of your promises to one another. The circle represents eternity, for such is the pledge of your love." He turned to Jared. "Jared Douglas, do you take Alex Ross to be your lawfully wedded husband to have and to hold from this day forward, till death do you part?"
"I do." Jared's voice sounded strong and sure without a thread of doubt. Brother Don turned his attention to Alex.
"Alex Ross, do you take Jared Douglas to be your lawfully wedded husband to have and to hold from this day forward, till death do you part?"
Alex's brilliant grin could have lit the night. "Hell, yes." Laughter rippled behind them and Jared squeezed his hand hard before reaching for the ring the minster held out for him.
"Please place the ring on Alex's finger and repeat after me."
Jared slipped the ring onto Alex's left ring finger, their eyes locked together as Jared spoke the words after Brother Don. "Alexander Ross, I thee wed."
Alex accepted the remaining ring from the minister. The band felt cool when it slid the length of his finger.
Alex stared into his eyes and his voice was little more than a whisper when he spoke. "Jared Douglas, I thee wed."
Laughing at the roaring cheer from the onlookers, Brother Don announced. "By the powers invested in me by God and the state, I pronounce you legally wed. What God has brought together let no man tear asunder."
Eyes locked with Alex's, Jared stepped into his space, hands coming to rest on his hips. Heart pounding, he kissed the lips of his husband for the first time. Alex fisted Jared's hair, licking his way into Jared's mouth. With a low growl, Jared allowed it. His legs parted and Alex slotted between them. Jared kept one hand on Alex's hip, but the other slid under his jacket, tugging at his shirt, seeking bare skin.
A strong hand grabbed Jared's wrist, stopping the movement of his arm, and Clark's voice laughed in his ear. "Oh, no, you don't, not yet."
Jared surfaced from their lust-filled fog, blinking.
Thankfully their guests were still laughing as Annie proclaimed, "That was the most romantic thing I've ever seen!"
Faces flushed with as much lust as embarrassment, Jared and Alex turned to face the crowd. Brother Don lifted their joined hands over their heads.
"Ladies and Gentlemen, May I present Jared and Alexander Douglas-Ross."
Hope It Never Ends
Alex hunched into his jacket, hands buried deep in the pockets when the wind cut across the backyard, buffeting him as he made his way to the workshop he'd shared with Jared for the past nineteen years. Alex slippe
d through the door leading to Jared’s half of the downstairs work area and made sure to secure it against the strong gusts. The weather on their thirty-fifth anniversary was a lot worse than it had been for their wedding, making Alex glad their celebration would be held indoors.
He'd made reservations at Leo's and if he could find Jared they'd spend the night eating good food and then come home to watch something on TV they'd ignore in favor of making out. Making out seemed like an undignified activity for a couple fifty-somethings, but Alex wasn't about to give it up. Maybe they could figure out something else to call it.
"What are you doing?" Alex's gaze fixed on Jared standing over his router, examining it, other tools lined up on the table beside him. One day out from under the doctor's care and there he was working. Alex knew he should have anticipated Jared's eagerness to get back to work, but had been lulled by his willingness to lie in bed all morning.
Jared looked up, smile flashing. "Don't worry, I'm not working. I promised I wouldn't start until Monday. I just came down to figure out how far behind I am and get the tools ready. I called Mr Grimshaw and he was very understanding about the delay on his table. I'm going to work on it first. I noticed my stack of orders is a lot smaller than I expected."
Walking up to stand beside him, Alex watched Jared check out his tools with practiced ease. "Clark's twins and Matt took care of some of the customers who weren't insisting on the master's touch."
"Matt? Really? I wish I could have seen him work. I thought he'd purged his mind of anything related to carpentry." Jared sounded wistful and Alex bumped shoulders with him.
"I mentioned that to him. It seems age is making our son more practical. Writing is his first love, but he's learned the value of fix-it-yourself." Alex shook his head, remembering the epic battles Jared and Matt had engaged in over learning to work wood, and anything else related to manual labor.