The Gift of Friends

by Emma Hannigan

‘You’ve nothing to apologise for,’ Maia said. ‘I just don’t know how you don’t whack him with one of those damn chairs. He’d have had a frying pan in the face long before now if he was my husband.’

  Pearl smiled. ‘That beautiful image is going to sustain me today, Maia.’

  ‘Then my work here is done,’ Maia said, laughing. ‘Right, we’ll leave you to it. But text me if you need anything else at all.’

  ‘Just turn up and keep me sane,’ Pearl said.

  Maia and Nancy walked back to Maia’s gate and stood looking at each other for a few moments.

  ‘When I see men like that,’ Nancy said, ‘I’m so glad I have no husband or kids. He’s so stifling. It’s like you can’t even breathe properly when he’s around.’

  ‘Pearl is such a sweetie,’ Maia said. ‘It breaks my heart to see that. I mean, Freddie’s not exactly going to lay his coat over a puddle for me, but my God, he’s decent and talks to me like I’m a human being, with feelings. Well, most of the time at any rate.’

  ‘Anyway,’ Nancy said, ‘as Pearl said, we can go along and help her enjoy it. Hopefully Seth will find some boring old fart to talk army stuff with and she can forget about him. I’ll go over and get ready. I’ll see you there in a while.’

  ‘Okay, see you later,’ Maia said. She stood at the gate watching Nancy walk in her sprightly way back towards her house. She was so lucky to have friends like these women. Even Betsy, she thought with a smile. She loved to shock Betsy with a choice comment every now and then, but she also knew Betsy had the biggest and warmest heart and would do anything to help a friend.

  She turned and started to walk slowly up her curving driveway, admiring the new lavender border the gardener had added. It worked beautifully. Imagine her with a lavender border! It was far from that she was raised. When they’d first moved here, she’d found the whole friendly neighbour scene a bit much. She’d also felt very insecure because she was from a different side of town. But she soon learned that everyone was from different backgrounds and, more to the point, they weren’t concerned about where she’d come from. They were so welcoming and genuinely seemed to want her to join in with them, that she’d caved and ‘become one of them’, as Freddie liked to tease her. He was a rough diamond, but she felt he liked the fact that she’d learned how to hob-nob with the best of them over the years. She’d learned so much from Betsy, Nancy and Pearl, and now she could host a book club evening as if she was born to it.

  The first time she’d mentioned going to the book club, Freddie had nearly coughed up his dinner. ‘You’re going to a bleedin’ book club!’ he’d teased her. ‘Does that mean you have to read something that’s not a glossy magazine?’

  Freddie was a good sort, though. Nothing like that Seth fella, who had a poker up his arse and couldn’t crack a smile for love nor money. Although Maia had been getting worried about her husband lately. He seemed distracted, and it was harder to make him laugh. There was something a bit distant about him, like he wasn’t really there even when he was beside her. It was bothering her, truth be told, but she didn’t know what to do about it. She looked across at Pearl’s house, thinking about the beautiful wedding day that was unfolding, when she had a lightbulb moment. What had Nancy said – arrange something to look forward to? She knew exactly what to do.

  Maia went into the kitchen and found that Freddie had emptied the remaining contents of the cafetière into a big mug and was slurping it contentedly.

  ‘How’s my loving husband?’ Maia asked, kissing his forehead.

  ‘In danger of being late,’ Freddie said. ‘I’ll just finish this and go.’

  ‘You’re working a hell of a lot of hours lately,’ Maia said. ‘We must try to have a date night, get some time to talk.’

  ‘Talk about what?’ Freddie demanded, looking at her sharply.

  ‘Jesus,’ said Maia, ‘you’d swear I was from the Revenue. It’s me, Freddie, your wife, remember?’

  He smiled. ‘Sorry, love. It’s just whenever someone says they want to talk to me, it usually ends up costing me money.’

  ‘Funny you should say that,’ Maia said, ‘because I’ve just had a fantastic idea.’

  Freddie groaned. ‘How much?’

  ‘It’s a really good idea,’ Maia said. ‘I’m kind of dying inside with the kids getting ready to leave, and you won’t admit it but I know you are too.’

  He shrugged. ‘They have to grow up and live their lives.’

  ‘I know,’ Maia said, ‘but that doesn’t mean I’m not sad about it. But while we still have them, how about we celebrate our family? You and me are twenty years’ married this year, so I’m thinking a party, big celebration, get everyone around and toast you and me and what we’ve achieved in raising Zara and Zach. What do you think?’

  He shrugged again, and she felt a flash of irritation. What was it with men and shrugging? It was like they thought it constituted actual communication.

  ‘Well?’ she demanded. ‘Have you fallen so far out of love with me that you don’t care anymore?’

  Freddie looked at her in surprise. ‘Where’s that coming from? Look, I’m no good at the organising, so you go ahead and arrange whatever you like, okay? It’s a great idea. And the kids will love it. We could all do with a lift, and it’ll be a night to remember if you’re the brains behind it.’

  ‘That’s more like it,’ Maia said, reaching over to take his hand. ‘Bit of enthusiasm.’

  Freddie looked at his watch. ‘Have to get going, okay? I’ll see you later.’

  ‘So you definitely can’t come to the wedding next door?’

  He shook his head. ‘Told you, just can’t fit it in. But I hope you have a great day.’

  The front door slammed shut behind him, and Maia was left standing in her spotless kitchen, in the silence. She looked around her and couldn’t help thinking that she was standing in her own dismal future: quiet, empty, on her own. It made her heart sink. If her mother could see her now, she’d laugh in her face.

  From the time she could walk, Roisin White had made her daughter model. Maia hadn’t minded until she’d hit her teens. By that point she found it excruciatingly embarrassing and wanted nothing more than to curl into a ball when Roisin marched her into constant auditions. Her mother despaired when she wasn’t chosen, while Maia secretly rejoiced.

  ‘You’ve been chosen to do a yoghurt commercial, Maia!’ Roisin said one day when she came in from school. ‘It’s going to pay out thousands. We’ll be able to go on a foreign holiday for the first time!’ Maia knew she couldn’t refuse and even though everyone at school would slag her to death, it had to be done.

  Maia never saw a penny of the money. They didn’t go on a holiday either. Her mother bought her some hair clips and a t-shirt and told her to be glad of it. In retrospect, Maia now knew that the extra cash had been a lifesaver for her parents. They had so many to look after and she hadn’t understood then the pressure they must’ve been under, especially coming up to back to school time or Christmas.

  One good thing came out of it, though. She’d met Freddie at that yoghurt commercial shoot. He was there with his equally pushy mother, Bridgie. Mercifully, Freddie understood how much she hated being paraded and made to perform like a seal. But like Maia, his ma was struggling to make ends meet and he was the golden boy with the good looks, and so it was his duty to bring home the bacon too.

  ‘He’s my star,’ Bridgie said to Roisin. ‘I’ve four others and they got the worst of me and the old man put together. This one is our looker!’

  ‘Our Maia is the same,’ Roisin agreed. ‘We might as well make hay while the sun shines and sure, they love every second of it.’

  In the commercial Maia and Freddie were playing childhood sweethearts and had to kiss at the end. There was lots of hand holding too, which made them both blush like crazy at first.

  ‘This is kind of awkward, isn’t it?’ he said after the first couple of run-throughs.

  ‘Yeah,’ she said, blushing wi
ldly and wanting the ground to swallow her up.

  ‘I’m finding it much worse because I kind of like you,’ he said. ‘I’ve seen you before at other auditions and always fancied you.’

  ‘You have?’ she asked in astonishment. Maia had very little experience with boys and didn’t really know how to react. So she went along with Freddie, who decided by the end of the commercial that they were an item. He put his arm around her when they weren’t shooting and told her she was his girl. She didn’t object, and neither did Roisin – the two mothers were delighted, in fact, and on board with the whole thing.

  They married young, partly to get away from their mothers and partly because they wanted to. They got a small flat above a betting office where Freddie got a job. There he met some dodgy fellas who got him into ‘business’. Soon they were living in a townhouse, then a semi-detached house where Maia thought she’d died and gone to heaven. She longed for a baby but none came. Month after month her hopes were raised and swiftly dashed again.

  The day Freddie came home and threw a set of keys on the table and looked at her with an expression of pure glee on his face she was confused.

  ‘We’re going up in the world, baby! I’ve just bought a house on Kingfisher Road.’

  ‘Whaaat?’ she screamed. ‘But how? I don’t understand . . .’

  ‘Ask no questions and hear no lies,’ he warned. ‘We’re moving and that’s all you need to know, my precious. Pack the house up, we’re moving tomorrow. This place is sold and we’re on the pig’s back.’

  Her ma was delighted and started to get pushy again. ‘Tell me as soon as you’re pregnant. That’s a massive industry. They’ll all want you with a bump, especially if you live in one of them posh houses. They can come to your place and do them classy shots for the lifestyle magazines.’

  Maia shuddered as she thought of that dreadful time in her life. Once the twins were born, Roisin went into overdrive, going on and on about putting her babies into adverts. Maia just kept saying no, hoping one day her ma would hear her. Eventually, it all came to a head one horrible day. Roisin had been arguing her case for over an hour, insisting they bring the twins to an audition that day. Maia was on her last nerve.

  ‘Twins! And one of each. You’re mad, Maia. Have I taught you nothing?’

  ‘Yes,’ Maia spat, anger taking over. ‘You’ve taught me that I don’t want to exploit my children and push them into doing stuff they hate!’

  The fall-out between her and Roisin was massive. Her ma took serious offence at being accused of ruining her childhood and Maia simply couldn’t back down and tell her it was okay, because it wasn’t. They drifted apart and before they knew it, years had passed. Roisin hated calling to Kingfisher Road, saying it was snobby and made her feel inadequate. Maia took that as a personal slight and couldn’t understand why her ma couldn’t be happy for her.

  Freddie listened to Maia’s grief about the situation for as long as he could, but eventually he snapped too.

  ‘You’re not here to act as a bleedin’ counsellor to your ma,’ he roared after yet another tearful rant by Maia about Roisin. ‘If I come home and find you crying over her once more, I swear I’ll drive over to that hell-hole you called home and tell her once and for all to keep to herself. She’s a selfish cow, just like my ma. They used us when they could and now they can both sod off. Enough is enough, and we’re old enough to make our own decisions now.’

  Maia was a bit shocked at first, but then she realised Freddie was absolutely right. Zara would say it was a toxic situation, and that’s exactly how it had been; Roisin’s greed was like a poison, seeping into everything. But with Freddie’s strength, Maia was finally able to make a break.

  Of course, now that she needed him most, her husband seemed to be pulling away and disappearing. Maia felt like her whole world was turning to sand and running through her fingers. First her darling twins, and now Freddie. One way or another, everyone seemed to be leaving. No doubt about it, her mother would find her life a right old hoot if she knew how things were unfolding now.

  Maia felt like lying down on the floor and crying, but she straightened up her back and ordered herself to cop on.

  ‘Chin up, Maia,’ she whispered to herself. ‘Time to put the glad rags on and pin a smile to your face.’

  Chapter 3

  LILY-ROSE WAS A PICTURE-PERFECT BRIDE. HER makeup was dewy soft, her long, thick chestnut-brown hair styled in a chignon with a sprig of gardenia – simple but chic. It had taken them six visits to town to finally find the dress, and Pearl had enjoyed every moment of that precious time. Her niece was an absolute darling, and tripping about from bridal shop to bridal shop, sipping Prosecco in each one, had been some of the happiest times of Pearl’s life. And it had been so worth it, looking at the beautiful young woman standing before her now.

  ‘You are so beautiful,’ Pearl said, taking her hand. ‘Leo is going to melt when he sees you.’

  ‘Thanks, Auntie Pearl,’ Lily-Rose said, blushing. ‘It’s a bit weird, but God I love this dress. I don’t know how to thank you for . . .’

  ‘Forget it,’ Pearl said. ‘You know you mean the world to me. I’m so happy you let us host your big day.’

  ‘What’s the delay?’ Seth’s voice called from the corridor. ‘Everyone is assembled and waiting.’

  Lily-Rose grinned at Pearl. ‘He’s so nervous about all this, isn’t he? He’s covering it up by being all army efficient.’

  No, he’s not, Pearl thought. That’s just him.

  ‘He’s so pleased that he gets to walk you down the aisle,’ she said. ‘You’ve made his day.’

  In fact, the suggestion of hosting the event had been Seth’s idea in the beginning. He might be gruff and harsh with everyone else, but Lily-Rose had had a special place in his heart from the day she was born. She was Pearl’s sister Barbara’s child, but you’d swear she was Seth’s own flesh and blood the way he took to her. Most adults were wary of Seth, and children certainly didn’t flock to his side. But Lily-Rose never seemed to notice that and would climb onto his lap with a book under her little arm and insist he read to her.

  ‘No unka Seth,’ she’d say. ‘Do the voices. Little Red Riding Hood has a different voice to the wolf, silly!’

  So he’d end up booming one minute then trying to be ladylike the next. Their special relationship warmed Pearl’s heart and gave her faith in her husband over the years. He was such a difficult man to live with and was so incredibly staunch about rules and regulations that she often felt he still thought he was out in Cyprus ordering his troops about rather than here in Vayhill, where he was supposed to be a husband and father.

  ‘Is the bride ready?’ Barbara asked, bustling into the room. ‘Full house down there.’ She smiled at the sight of Lily-Rose. ‘My own daughter, nearly a married woman. Your father may have dumped us but it’s all turned out well, hasn’t it?’

  Pearl bit the inside of her cheek. Barbara could be trying at the best of times, but today she was playing ‘heroic single mother’ and it was doing Pearl’s head in. Pearl had been like a surrogate mother to Lily-Rose, always there when it suited Barbara not to be. This sudden display of maternal pride was hard to take.

  ‘I’m ready,’ Lily-Rose said.

  Pearl went behind, making sure the detachable train didn’t snag on anything. Seth beamed when Lily-Rose emerged from the room.

  ‘My goodness, you look perfectly beautiful,’ he said, holding out his arm.

  Lily-Rose took his arm and nodded at him. ‘Let’s do this,’ she said.

  ‘Your wish is my command,’ Seth said, and the two of them laughed.

  Pearl followed them down, then slipped into her seat, with Barbara beside her. The string quartet began to play Clair de Lune, and it was finally happening. All those long months of preparation had been for this moment. Pearl felt her shoulders relax a smidgen, knowing she could do no more. She watched Seth walk proudly next to Lily-Rose and she felt a stab of jealousy that he got to give her a
way. She’d felt all along that Lily-Rose really could have asked her, although she understood it would probably have caused trouble with Barbara. But still, she had been the rock Lily-Rose had built her whole life on, and she would have loved to accompany her down the aisle to her waiting Leo.

  Seth looked the part, and it made Pearl remember their own wedding day. She didn’t want to, she tried to stay away from those memories because all the promises of that day had fallen asunder over time. Seth had loved her then, in his way, and she’d really believed they were going to share a happy life together. She watched Leo smile at Lily-Rose and sent up a fervent prayer that they would make each other happy. It was such a deeply lonely sense of failure when a marriage didn’t work out. She’d never been able to tell anyone about it.

  They had married when she was almost thirty, and now she was forty-seven and could barely recognise her own life. Then, she had a good marriage, lived in a pleasant semi-detached house near the town centre and worked as a receptionist for a GP. She thought it would always be like that. But then she got pregnant. Seth was thrilled and kept talking about how he wanted a son, a ‘chip off the old block’. Whenever he said it, Pearl felt uneasy, but she went along with it because he was happy. Going along with things was her speciality, she thought bitterly.

  The reason she had acquired enough money to live on Kingfisher Road was down to Drew. He’d been awarded the largest amount of money ever recorded against the maternity hospital. They’d messed up during his birth and as a result he’d suffered a lack of oxygen to his brain. The effect was devastating and had left him with the mind of a six-year-old, along with behavioural disorders that meant he could only function within a strict routine. Pearl had lamented and grieved for the life she’d hoped her son would have, but as time passed she loved him more and more and simply accepted his shortcomings. They were part of him and although he required full-time care, Pearl mostly managed very well.

  The money they got for Drew was in her name officially, so that was probably why Seth never grumbled about how she spent it. Seth kept his salary in his own account and that never bothered her either. To be fair, he had never protested about the money she lavished on Lily-Rose and her brothers and, by extension, on Barbara. He had been pleased that Pearl was paying for the whole wedding and thereby ensuring it was a truly memorable occasion. It suited his image of himself as the kind benefactor to Lily-Rose. For his part, he never paid for so much as a cup of coffee when they were out. If they had a meal or drinks, he’d sit back and let her pay out of Drew’s money. Seth wasn’t in Drew’s life in any meaningful way, but he didn’t interfere with the childcare arrangements and as long as they stayed out of his way and didn’t annoy him, he was fine.