The Gift of Friends

by Emma Hannigan

  ‘How about I take you both out to lunch?’ Freddie said. ‘We can try to get our heads around it over a steak and chips.’

  ‘Good idea,’ Maia said.

  The three of them left the agency and stepped out into the cold December wind.

  ‘Thank you, Freddie,’ Nancy said. ‘I don’t know what would have happened if you hadn’t intervened.’

  Maia looked at her husband, and the pain of him leaving was intense. He was a rock, and he’d go to bat for any of them. Living without him was going to be horrible. She and Nancy would have to mind each other. She honestly didn’t know what she was going to do with herself when she wasn’t the twins’ mother and she wasn’t Freddie’s wife. It felt like everything was being stripped away from her, and she didn’t know what she’d be left with in the end.

  Chapter 34

  NANCY FELT LIKE SHE’D BEEN LIVING IN SOME strange sort of dream, and she badly needed a good dose of reality with her friends. She’d put out a call to them, inviting them over for wine and tapas, and everyone had accepted. She reckoned that, like her, they needed a chance to sit down, breathe and work through all that had happened in the past two months. They were staring down the barrel of Christmas, but the past year had to be put to bed first.

  She loved doing tapas because there was no right way or wrong way, it was just a pile of tasty bites on the table and everyone helping themselves. She enjoyed the informality of it. She spent the day preparing a good variety of different dishes, then, with an hour to spare, went upstairs to shower and change. Ever since the revelation in the adoption agency, her mind had been ticking on overtime, trying to make sense of it. Whether she was in the shower, washing the dishes or watering the flowerbeds, she was thinking about her life and all the decisions that had led to this point. It was exhausting, but at the same time it felt therapeutic. Sometimes you needed a short, sharp shock, she thought, to jolt you out of the lazy old ways of thinking and give you new eyes. Well, she’d certainly had a short, sharp shock!

  She was uncorking a couple of good bottles of wine when the doorbell rang and Nelly started up barking. With Nelly at her heels, Nancy flung open the front door – and all four women were standing together outside.

  ‘Surprise!’ Maia shouted. ‘You’re getting us as a job lot tonight.’

  ‘Come in, come in out of the cold,’ Nancy said, ushering them inside and closing the door behind them. ‘You can throw the coats into the parlour,’ she said. ‘We’re sitting in the kitchen.’

  ‘It looks so warm and cosy,’ Danielle said, admiring the candlelit kitchen. ‘And it smells divine. I’m glad I’m absolutely starving.’

  ‘That’s my kind of guest,’ Nancy said, laughing. ‘Don’t stand on ceremony, you lot. Get your asses into a chair and fill your plates.’

  There was warm chatter and laughter as they sampled the dishes, poured wine and talked over each other. Nancy just adored nights like this, and she could feel its good effects like a balm on her soul.

  ‘I think we have to acknowledge all that’s happened in the last while,’ she said, and her friends fell silent. ‘It’s been a crazy few months, hasn’t it? I think it all started when Danielle moved in,’ she said, winking at Danielle. ‘You brought the crazy with you.’

  Danielle laughed. ‘I don’t know about that, but it has been one thing after another, hasn’t it?’

  Nancy nodded. ‘I don’t know who knows what, but I’ve been trying to process all that’s been going on in my life. I never spoke about it until recently, but I gave birth to a baby boy when I was sixteen, and my family sent me to a Magdalene Laundry.’

  ‘Oh my God,’ Pearl said. ‘I didn’t know that.’

  ‘It wasn’t something I advertised,’ Nancy said drily. ‘Plus, I was glad that my life was child-free, so I just let it go. But then a guy turned up claiming to be my son. He was absolutely lovely, but I didn’t feel a connection to him. I thought I would in time. But then the wonderful Freddie spotted him in my garden, when he was working to try to sell my house, I might add, and Freddie recognised him as a con man.’

  Pearl was open-mouthed, as was Betsy.

  ‘Good Lord, Nancy,’ Betsy said. ‘I had no idea all this was going on. Have I been so besotted by Arnie that I’ve become a bad friend? I didn’t know Pearl’s situation, and now it turns out I didn’t know yours either.’

  Nancy shook her head. ‘Don’t be silly, Betsy. I’m telling you all now because you’re such wonderful friends. I just need to get it off my chest, and you’re the only people I want to share it with.’

  ‘So what happened?’ Pearl said.

  ‘Freddie marched me straight to the adoption agency and confronted them about it. Turns out this guy, Steve, had contacted two other women as well. He was just looking to part us from our money. Freddie handed over what he knew about Steve, and today I got a call from the agency telling me he has been arrested. So I guess that nightmare is over now.’

  ‘That’s great news,’ Maia said. ‘But I hope you’re okay.’

  ‘Getting there,’ Nancy said, smiling.

  ‘It’s really not fair,’ Betsy said. ‘You had the whole CPO stress, and then this was landed on you as well.’

  ‘It’s what they always say about buses, isn’t it?’ Maia said. ‘You wait for ages and they all come at once.’

  Nancy laughed. ‘I just hope they’ve all gone back to the depot now and there’s no more trundling down the road at me.’

  ‘I feel bad because things are going so well for us,’ Betsy said. ‘I would have happily taken on one of your problems, Nancy.’

  ‘Well, you did have the truly horrible Tasha to deal with,’ Nancy said. ‘Is that all resolved now?’

  ‘I think so,’ Betsy said. ‘We had a young man who looked like a tramp knock at the door one morning, asking for a bag she’d left behind with her passport in it, would you believe.’

  ‘One of the squatters?’ Nancy asked. ‘What did you do?’

  ‘Brought him in and gave him a coffee,’ Betsy said.

  ‘Oh you’re so good,’ Maia squealed. ‘I’d have hosed him down on the lawn and sent him on his way.’

  ‘No you wouldn’t,’ Betsy said. ‘He was actually a lovely chap. Anyway, he took the bag and told us Tasha was flying home, so that’s the last of her, for a while anyway. And Graham has landed a job he likes, plus we’ve suggested building a townhouse next to our house for him and Arnie, and he’s agreed. So I’m apologising in advance about builders clogging up the place come next February.’

  ‘That’s a brilliant idea,’ Maia said. ‘Builders will be a pain, but it’ll be worth it. It’s definitely the best outcome for Graham and Arnie.’

  Nancy refilled everyone’s glasses, topping up the elderflower cordial she and Danielle were drinking.

  ‘You’re really blooming now, sweetie,’ Nancy said, smiling at Danielle’s rounded bump.

  ‘I’m so lucky because I feel great,’ Danielle said. ‘It’s been an easy pregnancy so far.’

  ‘You might get a nice placid child then,’ Pearl said. ‘I can’t wait for a new baby on the road. It’s going to be lovely.’

  ‘And how about you and Drew?’ Danielle asked. ‘I don’t want to pry, but I keep wondering how you’re getting on.’

  Pearl stared at her wine glass sadly. ‘Actually, I’ve had a really bad week.’

  ‘Did Seth come back?’ Maia said, fear in her voice.

  Pearl shook her head. ‘No, he has disowned us, which suits me fine. I’m going to initiate divorce proceedings as soon as I can, which will probably take three years to complete, but I’ll wait. No, me and Drew are good and we’re putting the past behind us, that’s all fine. It’s just . . .’ She looked tearfully at her friends, and Nancy felt she could guess what was coming next. ‘It’s just that Tommy has left.’

  ‘No!’ Betsy said. ‘For good?’

  ‘He doesn’t know,’ Pearl said. ‘We had a big talk the other night and he said the new situation was difficu
lt for him. He’d always wanted more freedom to be with me, but now that he has it, he just feels very unsure. He asked for time to think about it, and he’s gone back to Cork until he feels ready to talk to me again.’ She rubbed her eyes. ‘God, I miss him so much. I finally got what I wanted, and it looks like he doesn’t want me.’ She started to cry softly.

  ‘That’s not true,’ Nancy said gently. ‘He can just see that with Seth out of the way, you and him are free to choose each other properly, in a committed way, and that has changed everything. But I do think he’s mad about you, Pearl.’

  ‘I just don’t know anymore,’ Pearl said. ‘I thought so too, but if he’s able to leave, what does that mean?’

  ‘Just give him time,’ Nancy said. ‘He needs to think it through at his own pace and reach his own conclusions in his own good time, that’s all.’

  Pearl nodded. ‘I tell you what, though, if he doesn’t want me, I’m done. No more men. It’s Tommy or nothing.’

  ‘It’s not a bad choice,’ Nancy said. ‘I really enjoy living alone.’

  ‘The only thing is,’ Pearl said, ‘I feel a bit useless now. Drew is at school all morning, and I’ve the housework done by 9 a.m., especially now it doesn’t have to be military perfect, and then I’m sort of looking around for things to do. Tommy moving out has been so hard, but you know, it’s kind of giving me a new perspective. I feel like I want a purpose in life, for myself, you know? But I’ve no idea what.’

  ‘I feel exactly the same way,’ Maia said, putting down her wine glass and turning to Pearl. ‘I know just what you mean. I’ve been dreading the twins leaving because I know they’ll take my whole reason for getting out of bed with them. I feel like I have this energy, but I’ve nowhere to put it. I don’t even have Freddie anymore.’

  ‘What?’ Nancy said, looking shocked. ‘What do you mean? Oh Jesus, Maia, you two haven’t split up, have you?’

  Maia bit her lip. ‘Well, that’s what you’re going to hear has happened, but there’s more to it than that.’

  ‘I don’t think my heart can take many more revelations,’ Betsy said, clutching her chest. ‘What’s going on, Maia?’

  ‘I’m only telling you lot because I trust you completely,’ Maia said, dropping her voice. ‘Freddie hit some business trouble. A protection racket targeted him and he asked some old contacts from Westwood to step in and watch his back, but it all went pear-shaped and everyone was coming at him for money. I thought he was having an affair, to be honest, but then he finally came clean and told me. So we came up with a plan, that he would go to America for six months, help Zach to settle in, and that I’d stay here and put it about that he’d deserted me for another woman. I’ve talked to the police and they’re aware of the situation now. He’ll stay away for six months, and then we’ll see what the lie of the land looks like and hopefully he can come home and start again somewhere else.’

  ‘That’s incredible,’ Danielle said. ‘I can’t believe he’s actually had to go. Ah Maia, that’s horrible for you. You’ll be left on your own in the new year, then. Please do knock over to me whenever you want. Don’t be lonely.’

  ‘Easier said than done,’ Maia said, taking another big swig of wine. ‘I’m facing a big empty house and I don’t mind admitting that I’m scared. Same as Pearl, I just feel like I’ve no purpose to my days, no one to help or look after. I’d say I’ll be cooking casseroles and cakes for you all to beat the band.’

  ‘Well that would be a welcome side-effect,’ Nancy said, with a smile. ‘But seriously, though, would you not think of looking for a part-time job, or volunteering somewhere maybe? You’re fantastic, Maia, you could turn your hand to anything.’

  ‘I don’t exactly have any marketable skills,’ Maia said. ‘Plus I’d have to explain being a stay-at-home mum for eighteen years, I’m not sure many employers would see that as a plus point.’

  ‘We said we’d do something together, didn’t we?’ Pearl said. ‘Maybe do a class. Or even set something up ourselves?’

  Maia looked at her. ‘Well, I did have one idea, but I wanted you all to tell me honestly if I’m being stupid.’

  ‘Shoot,’ Nancy said.

  ‘I was reading an article in Cosmo about these women who help women from disadvantaged areas to get jobs. There was this one, and she set up a clothes hire scheme. Women from places like Westwood, where I grew up, could go and get a suit for an interview, say, and it’s free of charge. It helps them get a foot on the ladder if they want to better themselves. When I read it, it just sort of clicked with me and I thought I’d love to do that. I got out of Westwood, but there must be lots of girls there who’d love to change their lives but can’t. What do you think?’ she said, looking at them doubtfully.

  ‘I love that idea,’ Danielle said immediately. ‘I can already think of one girl I know who’d be thrilled to hear of that. I think you should do it.’

  ‘How would we go about setting it up?’ Pearl said. ‘I’m definitely on for it, Maia.’

  ‘Well, I haven’t thought it through,’ said Maia, ‘but I suppose we’d need a space to store the clothes, where the women could come and try them on. And we’d have to build up a stock of clothes as well. We could maybe talk to Joanne, down in the boutique in Vayhill. She might be willing to put up a sign asking women round here to donate clothes.’

  ‘I think she would,’ Danielle said. ‘She’s really lovely, and she was telling me that she’s involved with some charities already, so she believes in ethical business.’

  ‘So, do you think I could do it?’ Maia said.

  ‘Absolutely,’ Danielle and Nancy said at the same time.

  ‘I’ve got some clothes to start you off,’ Betsy said. ‘And you can use the Residents’ Association as well. I can put a note in the newsletter asking for donations.’

  ‘So what about a space, then?’ Maia said.

  ‘What about the mews at the back of my place?’ Pearl said. ‘Would it be big enough?’

  ‘You might need that for Drew in future, though,’ Maia said.

  ‘I wonder,’ Pearl said, ‘if you’d consider adding to the idea?’

  ‘Go on,’ Maia said.

  ‘I would love to help women get into jobs or careers,’ Pearl said, ‘but if there was some way to help women who’ve suffered domestic abuse, that would be really important to me. I’m lucky that I have the house and money, but other women are really stuck. If we had a space like the mews, we could offer a drop-in space for women to have a coffee in peace and talk. I know we’re not counsellors, but sometimes just talking through a problem in a safe space can lead to change.’

  The women looked at each other in silence. It was a big ambition, but Pearl’s desire to help came from her heart and it would be wonderful to see her achieve it.

  ‘You know,’ said Danielle slowly, ‘you could think in terms of a digital drop-in space.’

  ‘And in English that would be?’ Nancy said.

  Danielle smiled. ‘I mean, there’s so much you can do with social media and with online vlogs and everything, you could help lots of women that way, connect straight to them. Then it wouldn’t depend on them getting physically to Pearl’s garden, which might be difficult for women living in situations where their husbands control them. But if you could offer help and advice online, it’s always open to them, twenty-four/seven.’

  Maia snapped her fingers. ‘Danielle, yet again you’re the resident genius. It’s perfect. If we do it your way, we just need a couple of computers and a work room. We could have the clothes there as well, but then we could write advice columns, and we can write them from experience. I mean, look at what you have here. Between the lot of us, we’ve a lifetime’s worth of experiences, good and bad. We could just be real women talking to real women.’

  ‘Yes,’ Pearl said. ‘Just helping anyone who needs help, if we can give it. I’m on for that. If I’d had somewhere I could have talked about things with people who didn’t know me, that would have really helped. This is
a brilliant idea, Maia. I really want to do it.’

  ‘Can I help as well?’ Betsy asked. ‘I know I have Arnie a lot, but with that kind of set-up, I could bring him along, couldn’t I? I’ve been blessed in my life, and I’d relish the opportunity to give back something now.’

  ‘Brilliant,’ Maia said. ‘The more, the merrier.’

  ‘How about this?’ Nancy said. ‘I have more rooms in this house than I can live in. I just go from sitting room to kitchen to bedroom and back again. So why not use this place as our work space? We can set up whatever computers are needed in the back room, keep all the clothes in one of the spare bedrooms and then you can all drop in and out as you have time available. I don’t know if it’ll work, but it sounds worth a try.’

  They looked at each and grinned.

  ‘That sounds very much like a plan,’ Maia said. She rubbed her hands together. ‘I’m so excited. Let’s get a pen and paper and start making plans right now.’

  Nancy fetched a notebook and biro, and Maia began writing down the ideas they shouted out. There was so much good energy in the room, Nancy was carried away on it. She had no idea if their notions would prove useful or feasible, but it felt so good to focus on something else entirely than her own life, and she reckoned the others felt the same way, especially Maia and Pearl.

  By midnight, they had exhausted all their ideas, and themselves. Nancy waved them all goodbye, then went into the kitchen to tidy away the plates and put on the dishwasher. When it was all tidy, she turned off the light, but then turned back and went and stood at the sink, staring out into the dark garden. The tree outlines were black against the navy sky, and there were so many stars twinkling, just like the night her darling husband had proposed to her. Outside on the sill, there was a little plate with the kingfishers’ breakfast ready for them. She smiled again to think of a bird saving her life. It was so random. Of course, without Danielle, it never would have happened. Life could create some very strange patterns, she thought.