My Mobster

by J. L. Drake

  I rubbed my eyes in an effort to get rid of the sleepiness. A lazy yawn escaped from my mouth and I groaned, falling back on the floor again as I crossed my arms over my chest.

  Turning my head to the side, I saw Alessio’s jacket lying next to my face. I frowned in confusion and slowly brought my hand to the jacket, running my fingers softly over the fabric.

  “Hmm,” I hummed as I tried to think back to last night, feeling strangely disoriented.

  Why am I holding his suit jacket?

  As soon as the thought ran through my mind, I quickly sat up, dizziness rushing through me. My harsh breathing filled the room and last night flashed before my eyes.

  I was worn out, tired of constantly thinking about the past. Tired of fighting my demons.

  Feeling numb, I brought his jacket to my chest, holding it there as I closed my eyes. I hated my nightmares. When I escaped, the first few nights were horrible. I could barely get any sleep. But then for two nights, I didn’t have any nightmares.

  I felt hopeful.

  Last night, all that hope came crashing down around me. I was so naïve to think that I could escape such a horrendous reality. Shaking my head at my own stupidity, I stood up and stumbled toward my bathroom.

  I didn’t even look at myself in the mirror. Instead, I walked straight to the shower and let the warm water cascade over me.

  The warmth began to seep under my skin and my muscles relaxed. I stayed under the spray longer than usual, trying to gather myself again.

  Closing the water, I stood still for a moment and closed my eyes. Stay strong. Don’t break. Don’t show weakness.

  Taking a deep breath, I opened my eyes again and stepped out of the shower.

  Stay strong. Don’t break. Don’t show weakness.

  Quickly drying myself, I dressed in the same clothes I had been wearing for weeks now. My black maid dress.

  When I was finished, I glanced in the mirror, looking at my reflection in silence.

  My eyes were red and puffy. Tiredness was clearly written all over my face. It didn’t come as a shock to me. The face in the reflection…I had seen it a million times. Looking exactly like that.

  Stay strong. Don’t break. Don’t show weakness.

  I walked away without a second look. Alessio’s suit jacket remained on the floor, where I had left it before.

  I bent down and took the jacket in my hand.

  I was trying so hard to avoid what I felt last night. There was no way to describe it. No words. I never felt that way before and I was still trying to wrap my head around it.

  Peace. That was what I felt. In the middle of yet another panic attack, Alessio’s jacket brought me peace.

  He brought me peace.

  How was that even possible?

  My mind was a mess when I walked into the kitchen, where Maddie and Lena were waiting for me. When I walked in, both of them gifted me with genuine happy smiles.

  “Good morning,” Lena said, standing by the sink.

  “Good morning,” I mumbled, trying to act as chirpy.

  “What are you doing with that?” Maddie asked, pointing at the jacket in my hand.

  I ran my hand over the soft fabric before replying. “I forgot to return it yesterday. So, I’m going to return it now.” I felt like I was in a daze.

  Maddie took a big bite of her apple.

  She stared at me with a strange expression and a smile on her face. Almost like she was having an inside joke with herself. She twisted her lips ruefully, trying very hard to hide that smile, but I still saw it.

  I placed the jacket on the stool before turning to Lena. “I’ll help you set the table for breakfast.”

  She nodded and handed me a tray of fruit. We were setting out the last plate when I saw Alessio and his men coming down the stairs.

  They were all dressed in their black suits, as always. If it weren’t for the guns attached to them, they would have looked like high class businessmen.

  But the guns kind of took that away. It made them look deadly instead.

  Everyone took their seats in silence as Maddie and I discreetly walked away. Instead of going into the kitchen, I stopped at the entrance. I didn’t know what came over me, but I turned slightly and stared at Alessio from the corner of my eye.

  I sucked in a shocked breath when I saw his focus already on me. Viktor was talking animatedly but Alessio wasn’t listening. His eyes, his whole attention was on me. Biting on my lips unconsciously, a shiver went through my body and I quickly swiveled around, breaking the connection.

  “Ayla, hurry. I wanna get this done,” Maddie called from inside the kitchen.

  “I’m coming,” I said softly. I walked in to find Maddie eating her breakfast, with another full plate beside her. She nodded toward the plate. We quickly ate, and then cleaned while the men were still eating.

  By the time the kitchen was spotless, they had finished their breakfast. Maddie and I walked out to see them getting up, and everyone scattered around the house, returning to what they’d been doing before breakfast.

  ***

  I walked into the kitchen to see Maddie holding a tray. As soon as she saw me, her face lit up and she gave me a huge smile. “Oh my God, you’re literally a life saver.”

  Giving her a confused look, I untied my apron from my waist. “What do you mean?”

  Instead of answering, she pushed the tray into my hand. She placed a glass full of white stuff on it. “What is this?” I asked.

  “Protein. For Alessio. I need you to give this to him,” she said.

  “What?” I didn’t want to see him. And I sure didn’t want to be in the same room as him. He was too intense. I had to stay away.

  “Please. Do this for me,” she begged.

  I shook my head. “Maddie, why can’t you go by yourself?”

  “Because,” she replied, biting on her lips nervously. “You know…”

  “Maddie?” I asked, raising my eyebrows in question.

  She was about to say something else, but then stopped. I turned to see what she was looking at, and saw Artur walking by.

  “Ayla!” Maddie whined. When I didn’t move, she glared at me and leaned forward to whisper in my ear. “He wants a quickie.”

  I gasped, but said nothing.

  “See! Now you understand,” she said. “C’mon, I can’t deny him anything. And we couldn’t do it for like two days. I’m sexually frustrated, Ayla.”

  I couldn’t believe I was having this conversation.

  “Close your mouth, Ayla.”

  I did so but then shook my head. “Maddie, I’m not going to Alessio. No way,” I said.

  “Why? You are supposed to see him anyway. You need to give him his jacket back, right?”

  I was about to refuse again, but she folded her hands together and pressed them underneath her chin, looking at me with big, hopeful eyes. “Please?”

  I couldn’t say no. Not when she was making that face. “Fine.”

  Maddie jumped up with excitement and quickly blew me a kiss before running out of the kitchen. I sighed and looked down at the tray. God, I really didn’t want to do this.

  Balancing the tray in one hand, I took the suit jacket in the other and made my way out of the kitchen. Alessio’s office was in the left wing and it looked the same as the rest of the house.

  I walked down the long corridor toward his office and admired the large landscape paintings on the wall. They were beautiful. So serene. A big contrast to the people living in this house. As I neared the wooden double door, I saw Nikolay standing outside. His hands were behind his back, his feet shoulder apart with his back stiff as he stared straight ahead. His eyes were on me, watching my every step.

  “I’m here to give Aless…I mean, Mr. Ivanshov his drink.”

  Without answering, he reached beside him and opened the door. Swallowing hard against the lump in my throat, I gave him a tight smile and walked in on shaky legs. Inside the office, huge windows overlooked the back garden.

>   The room was bright. The big desk sat in front of the windows, and Alessio sat behind the table, his chair pushed back as he faced the door. But then I saw a head of blonde hair on his lap.

  Wait—what?

  Oh my God.

  My heart stuttered when I saw her head moving up and down. Alessio’s hand was fisted in her hair, controlling her movements while he pushed his head against the back of his chair as he groaned.

  And then I heard a loud moan.

  I froze, and he glanced in my direction, his eyes making direct contact with mine. They flared with surprise but he didn’t move. I saw his mouth tilted upward in a small smirk. I hated it.

  He was by no means embarrassed. Instead, he held my gaze until he orgasmed. I was rendered completely speechless, and when I felt the tray shaking in my hands, I realized my entire body was shaking too.

  “We’re done here.” His hard voice made me jump. He didn’t sound or look affected by what had just happened.

  Releasing the grip he had on the woman’s hair, he pushed her upward. “Leave,” he ordered as he zipped his pants and tucked his shirt back in.

  She stepped away from him and grabbed her handbag, then sauntered past me, her steps confident. She didn’t appear like she cared that someone else had seen her in such a position. The evil glare she gave me told me everything I needed to know. She was pissed they’d been interrupted.

  The door closed behind me, but I stayed still. “What are you doing here?” Alessio asked.

  My heart thumped in my chest and I was suddenly feeling light-headed. He was completely calm as his eyes raked over my body, while I was practically hyperventilating.

  “Well?”

  My body shivered at his voice and I licked my lips nervously. When I saw his eyes following the movement, I quickly sucked my tongue back in and pressed my lips tight together. “Maddie…I…” I stumbled over my words, then took a step forward and placed the tray on the coffee table. “Your protein.” I kept my focus on the tray. I couldn’t look at him, not after what I just saw.

  I heard his chair squeak and from the corner of my eye, I saw him standing up. After fixing his suit, he walked around his desk and made his way toward me.

  Panic filled my body and I scrambled backward.

  Dropping his jacket on the couch, I kept my head down and mumbled in a rush, “And here’s your jacket. I forgot to return it yesterday.”

  “It’s—”

  He’d started to speak, but without giving him a chance to reply, I sprinted out of his office.

  Closing the door behind me, I leaned against it. Blood was roaring in my ears and my heart pounded.

  “Sorry about that. I didn’t know the boss had her inside,” a deep voice said.

  Letting out a squeak, I moved away in fright.

  “Woah. It’s just me,” the man said.

  I turned around to find Nikolay standing there with his hands up in mock surrender. There was no way he hadn’t known what Alessio was doing in there.

  “Look, I’m sorry. I seriously didn’t know,” he said, with a hint of sympathy.

  I opened my mouth to tell him what I thought of him, but thought better of it. I didn’t want to mess with the viper. Shaking my head, I walked away without sparing him or the door another glace.

  I was done with infuriating men.

  He’s an absolute pig.

  But a hot pig. The annoying voice had returned.

  A disgusting pig.

  I wanted to smack my head into a wall.

  Chapter 18

  I shouldn’t have expected anything else. Alessio was a mob boss, a king. Ruthless. Cold. Heartless. Unlovable. He didn’t care what people thought of him.

  Men like him behaved exactly like that. I had the experience firsthand, and I should have known, but for stupid reasons I thought maybe he was different.

  Clearly, he wasn’t.

  When I got downstairs, Maddie emerged from a closet beside the kitchen. Her hair was ruffled, her dress crooked, and she had a well-satisfied look on her face.

  When she saw me, she winked and then walked into the kitchen. Artur came out after her, and stared at her ass as she walked away.

  “Men,” I muttered to myself.

  I looked down as I walked past him, not wanting to see his lustful eyes.

  “Hey, Ayla,” he said.

  I nodded but didn’t turn around. “Good morning.”

  In the kitchen, Maddie leaned against the counter, a glass of orange juice in her hand. She sipped it, a small smirk playing across her lips.

  “Why are you looking at me like that?” I asked.

  “You look flushed. Out of breath.” Maddie set her glass down.

  I crossed my arms across my chest and shook my head. “I’m fine. What are you talking about?”

  She laughed. Entwining our arms together, she led me out of the kitchen. “You aren’t going to tell me, hmm?”

  “I don’t understand, Maddie.”

  “Stop playing with me! Did he kiss you? Did he do more than kiss you?”

  My eyes widened in shock when I realized what she was talking about. Letting out a gasp, I pulled my arm away. “Why would you think that?”

  She didn’t answer but laughed instead at my expression. Maddie brought her hand up and pinched me on the cheek. “You’re so cute.”

  I glared at her, but wasn’t sure it came across the way I intended. I had been living separately from emotion. As the thought ran through my mind, I felt myself shutting down.

  I felt happy here, but I was scared, because I had learned the hard way that happiness can be taken from you in a second.

  I was waiting for whatever happiness I’d found here to be taken from me.

  The moment when I would return to my cold room, chained to my bed, waiting for Alberto.

  Someone squeezed my arm. “Where did you go?” Maddie asked.

  “Nowhere,” I replied, forcing a tight smile and linking our arms together again. She was leading me toward the maids’ quarters. She pushed the door open and we walked inside the cozy living room. It smelled sweet, like roses. Only a select few of the maids actually lived in the mansion. It was big and beautifully modeled, the total opposite of how the maids’ quarters looked in my father’s estate. Maddie didn’t live in the maids’ quarters. She had her own room upstairs, same as Lena. But she enjoyed the large flat screen TV in the maids’ quarters.

  Maddie pulled me to the couch. She folded her legs beneath her and leaned against the couch sideways, facing me. “So? C’mon. I need all the juicy details,” she demanded, her eyes twinkling merrily.

  I shook my head. “Maddie, nothing happened. Seriously.”

  “Liar.”

  “Maddie—”

  “Tell me!”

  “Fine! Some woman was giving him a…a…”

  Her eyes widened in shock. “What? What was she doing?”

  “She was giving him a…you know.” God, this was so embarrassing.

  “Giving him what?” Her mouth twisted with amusement.

  “You know…”

  “Huh?” she said, feigning confusion.

  Throwing my hands in the air in exasperation, I spoke through gritted. “A…a blowjob!”

  As soon as the words crossed my lips, Maddie threw her head back and barked out a laugh. She held her stomach, laughing hysterically.

  Sinking in the couch, I closed my eyes. I didn’t find it funny.

  “Oh my God, babe. You are so cute,” she said through her laughter.

  “And you are so mean.”

  “But you still love me.” Her laughter had finally calmed down, but she still wore her gorgeous, sweet smile.

  I shrugged. She was right. I still loved her. She was my only friend.

  “So, that woman. What happened?” she asked. Maddie moved closer to me, her eyes wide as she stared at me expectantly.

  “Nothing happened. I walked in and saw them. When he was done, he ordered her to leave. I left the protein on t
he coffee table and walked away without giving him a chance to say anything.”

  “You walked away? Why do I find that so hard to believe?”

  “Okay, fine. I ran away,” I mumbled.

  “So he just finished right in front of you. No decency whatsoever to stop and apologize?”

  I shook my head mutely. Did she really expect him to stop? He was the most infuriating and unpredictable man on the planet. No way was he going to stop his extracurricular activities and act decent. He didn’t have time for decency, or privacy for that matter.

  “Damn, he really is infuriating,” Maddie said. “Who was she? I mean, how did she look?”

  “I don’t remember much. I was really embarrassed and shocked so didn’t pay any attention to her. But she had blonde hair and she was tall. Lean. She was gorgeous.”

  “Ah. It’s Nina. She’s always coming for more. Doesn’t matter that Alessio treats her like garbage after he’s done. I wouldn’t say it’s his fault, though. He has his rules and he lets the women know before they get involved. No attachment, just fucking and then they leave. But they still want to get involved.” She rolled her eyes.

  Why would they let themselves be treated like that—by their own free will?

  I never had a choice.

  I was bound and beaten into submission. No matter how much I begged, I never had a choice, so I had to accept my reality. But other women could have better lives and a loving relationship.

  Maddie’s attention was on the TV.

  “Maddie,” I said.

  “What is it?”

  “Why do women accept such behavior…when they have a choice?”

  She placed the remote control on her lap and turned to face me. “I don’t know, Ayla. Maybe they want the same thing? Maybe they don’t want a relationship. Maybe that’s what works for them. It’s their choice. But you know, even if you are the fuck buddy of a heartless mob boss, you are still under his protection. Which means money, a somewhat lavish life, and nobody messes with you.”

  “Hmmm.” I was trying to understand, but still couldn’t make sense of it.

  “Forget that,” Maddie said, then gave my knee a slap to bring my attention back to her.