A Place of Refuge

by Janet Lee Barton

  As they walked up the steps and he opened the door, Kathleen felt as if she had come home. Not to the tenements, not to the house Colleen would be calling home. But here to the place where she’d finally felt safe and cared for.

  “Kathleen! You’re home at last.” Elizabeth came out of the parlor and hugged her. “We’ve all been waiting up to welcome you back.”

  Mrs. Heaton and the rest of the boarders all welcomed Kathleen back home as Elizabeth led her and Luke back into the parlor.

  They all said how glad they were to have her back and Kathleen had to blink several times to keep her tears at bay. These people had come to mean so much to her in such a short time. She couldn’t explain it, but she felt that the Lord had orchestrated it all—from Luke keeping Clancy from hitting her that day in the park, to Mrs. Heaton handing her card to Kathleen before she left. Then to be brought here the night of her beating—she could only believe that the Lord had known all along where she needed to be.

  “I can’t tell you all how glad I am to be back. And I want to thank each of you for all you’ve done to help Colleen move into her new home. You’ve become family to us and we’ll be forever grateful to you all.”

  “That’s what family is for, Kathleen, dear,” Mrs. Heaton said. “My goal has always been for my boarders to feel they have family here in the city. And I hope that your sister and her boys will soon come to feel as welcome in this house as you are.”

  Kathleen looked around at all the faces she’d come to care about. They all did feel like family to her. Well, all except for Luke. And he—

  She looked over to see Luke smiling at her and the wink he gave her sent her pulse racing. She wasn’t sure what Luke was to her—but she knew he owned at least a corner of her heart and always would. And she was determined not to let him claim any more of it.

  Thoughts of what Clancy had done to her sister, and to her, clouded the joy of the moment. She wasn’t sure she’d ever be able to let any man lay claim to her heart. Not now, and maybe not ever.

  * * *

  Luke watched Kathleen as the others gathered around her. She seemed almost as happy as he was that she was back at Heaton House. And yet, she seemed to be avoiding eye contact with him.

  Maybe that wasn’t a bad thing. Every time his eyes met hers and she smiled at him, his chest tightened in a way that told him he could care deeply for her if he allowed himself to. But he wasn’t going to. He couldn’t let himself care that way about anyone again. Couldn’t bear the thought of anything happening to her. He still had nightmares about what happened to Beth, holding her in his arms while she took her last breath. Oh, no. He never wanted to experience that kind of pain again. And yet he couldn’t deny that he was strongly drawn to Kathleen and very protective of her. But he couldn’t fall in love with her.

  Gretchen brought in freshly baked cookies and as everyone gathered around her to grab one, Luke forced his thoughts away from the woman who’d been dominating them lately and onto his writing. Seeing how people who truly cared had been so much a part of helping Kathleen and her sister out of the tenements gave him more confidence that his book could give hope to others facing the same struggles.

  Instead of trying to write a book much like Jacob Riis’s How the Other Half Lives, in which he tried to inspire others to reach out and help, Luke wanted to provide hope to those still living in the tenements. To assure them that their lives could change for the better. And that if offered a helping hand, they needed to be willing to accept it.

  He knew that had been difficult for Colleen, but it was easy once she felt she would be helping others as much as she would be helped. Maybe that was the key to it all.

  Suddenly he felt a need to get back to work. He waited until the welcome-home party broke up, and was glad it didn’t take long. Everyone, Kathleen especially, seemed ready to call it a day.

  After good-nights were said and they began to head to their rooms, Kathleen began to follow Elizabeth and Julie and then turned back to him. Luke smiled at her as she approached him.

  “Thank you again for all your help today and for dinner,” she said.

  “You’re welcome. I’m glad you’ve moved back.”

  “So am I. It feels as if I’ve come home from a very long trip.”

  He nodded. It felt that way to him, too. “I’ll see you in the morning. Sleep well.”

  “You, too.” She started up the stairs and then turned back. Her lips parted as if she wanted to say something else. But then she gave a little shake of her head and only said, “Good night.”

  “Good night, Kathleen.” Luke watched her up to the landing and then turned to head down to the lower floor. He took the stairs two at a time, wanting to get his thoughts about changes in his manuscript down on paper before he forgot them.

  He had a direction for his book, now more so than ever. And once again it was Kathleen and her family who were the inspiration behind it.

  Chapter Twelve

  The next week passed swiftly for Kathleen. She was in meeting after meeting at the United Charities Building on Fourth Avenue and Twenty-second Street. The building had been set up to assist all the benevolent societies in the city as they tried to help those less fortunate.

  The Ladies’ Aide Society with their newly formed Child Day Care Program was one such society and it was no surprise to Kathleen that Mrs. Heaton sat on its board. The society had a small office in the building but Kathleen was told she could work from Heaton House where Mrs. Heaton had set up a desk for her in the small back parlor.

  She was feeling overwhelmed by the job she’d been hired to do, and as the week progressed she became more and more nervous.

  Luke must have sensed her worry, for after dinner on Thursday night he sought her out and asked if she’d like to take a walk.

  “Yes, I believe I would, thank you.”

  They met Mrs. Heaton in the hall and told her they were going for a walk.

  “Why don’t you take Kathleen to Gramercy Park? I don’t believe she’s been there yet, has she?”

  “No, I haven’t,” Kathleen answered for herself. “I’d love to see it, though.”

  “That is a great idea, Mrs. Heaton. I’ve been meaning to show it to her.”

  Mrs. Heaton nodded and went to the table in the foyer. She opened the drawer and pulled out a key. “Here you go, Luke. You two enjoy the nice evening.”

  “Thank you, we will,” Luke said.

  He swept Kathleen out the door and down the steps and onto the sidewalk. “You’ll love the park. It’s a great place to go when you need time alone or when you need to talk without worrying about someone walking in on your conversation.”

  “That might be nice.” She loved Heaton House, but it wasn’t always easy to have a private conversation with anyone.

  Luke tucked her hand in the crook of his arm and they sauntered down the walk until they came to the gated park. Kathleen was a bit surprised when Luke pulled out the key Mrs. Heaton gave him and unlocked the gate.

  “I still can’t believe this park is private.” Kathleen didn’t know of another that was.

  “It is. And each home only has two keys. It’s been that way since the beginning and no one is inclined to change it. It’s fairly small and was put in specifically for the residents of the neighborhood.”

  He led her into the park and Kathleen could see why the residents wanted to keep it to themselves. It was lovely, with trees that’d grown tall through the years and bushes that were sure to be filled with roses or other kinds of flowers as soon as it warmed enough for them to bloom. Luke led her into the middle of the garden and stopped at one of the benches. “Want to sit a little while?”

  “Yes, I think I would, thank you.” The park seemed an oasis in the middle of the city, much quieter than Central Park and very private. Yet, the lights in the
homes surrounding it did make it feel like a safe haven of sorts.

  She took a seat and Luke sat down beside her. “Now, tell me what’s bothering you. You’ve become quieter each evening since you started your new position. Are you regretting your decision to work for the Ladies’ Aide Society?”

  He’d come to read her entirely too well. Kathleen shook her head. “Oh, no, I don’t regret it, but I’m afraid they might regret hiring me.”

  “Now, why would they do that?”

  “I don’t want to disappoint Mrs. Heaton in any way, Luke, but I fear I’m not educated enough for this position. I—”

  “Kathleen, did anyone ask for your credentials?”

  “Well, no, but—”

  He raised an eyebrow at her. “Did they ask how far you went in school?”

  “No, but—”

  “Do you know the tenements and relate to those living there?”

  “Yes, of course I do. But, Luke, I don’t want to fail or disappoint anyone counting on me to hire the right people to run the houses or recommend those that need the day care help. I don’t have much experience in that kind of thing.”

  “I can assure you that none of the women you are working for have the kind of experience you do. They don’t understand what it is you and Colleen and your neighbors have gone through. They have good hearts and they want to help, but it’s going to take your experiences and your understanding of the people they want to help to be successful. You are the person they need, Kathleen.”

  For the first time that week, the kinks in Kathleen’s neck seemed to relax. From the first meeting on Monday until right this minute, she’d begun to doubt her abilities. But Luke made sense.

  She did know what it was like to live in the tenements. She knew what it was like to wonder where her next meal was coming from, to worry about physical abuse, to worry about her family. And she could honestly tell the people she talked to that she understood. She could do this job. Everything would be all right.

  “My fear was getting the best of me, I’m afraid. I haven’t been leaving things in the Lord’s hands like I should.”

  “Oh, maybe not in this instance. But I’ve watched you, Kathleen. I’ve seen you pray with your nephews, and I know you put your faith in the Lord to get you through hard times. I believe you trust the Lord more than most people I know.”

  Kathleen smiled. “I know He’s watched over Colleen and the boys, and me.” He’d also used Luke to help them, but she wasn’t sure Luke realized it.

  “That He has. And the Lord is going to use all you’ve been through for good. You’ll see. You are the right person for this job, Kathleen.”

  “Thank you, Luke. Your encouragement means a lot to me.” It meant more than she could say. No one had ever been there for her in the way Luke had been. But she was going to have to fight the attraction she felt for him. It was simply too easy to be around him.

  “That’s what friends are for, isn’t it?” he asked.

  Friends. They could be that, at least. “Yes, but I think you’ve been a better friend to me than I have been to you.”

  Luke shook his head. “Not so.”

  He looked as if he were about to say something more and decided against it. “I’m glad we’re friends.”

  “I am, too.” For that’s all they could be—at least for now—and maybe for always.

  * * *

  Luke looked up into the star-filled sky and stifled the sigh his chest fought to release. Friends. There was no doubt he wanted to be her friend, wanted her to be his. And that was a good thing. And yet, his heart longed for more—in spite of the heartbreak of his past.

  First his mother had left him and his father for another man when he was young. From then on, he’d had to live with a bitter man warning him never to trust his heart to a woman. And for years he’d believed him.

  But as he’d gotten older he’d realized it was his father’s bitterness and not his own, and he’d fallen in love with Beth. He’d been happier than at any time in his life, looking forward to their life together. And then she’d been killed. And he’d vowed never to fall in love again.

  Much as he’d begun to care about Kathleen, he couldn’t let his feelings turn to love. He could not go through that kind of heartache again. He was better off living at Heaton House amidst those he considered family.

  So why did he suddenly feel...so lonely? He’d been doing just fine, living at Heaton House, enjoying everyone’s company. He hadn’t wanted more until—

  “I suppose we should be getting back,” Kathleen said, interrupting his thoughts. “Thank you for bringing me here and helping me feel better about everything.”

  “You’re welcome.”

  They both stood and sauntered back to the gate. The night was deepening and the stars shone brightly as Luke locked the gate behind them and they started back to Heaton House. “When is it you’re going to start visiting buildings in the tenements?”

  “I hope to begin Monday morning. I’ve been mapping out which ones to go to first. I thought I might start with our old neighborhood, with the people I know. They might also be able to suggest someone to run the other houses.”

  “I think that’s a good idea. Might as well start with a familiar area. You’ll do fine.”

  “I think I’ll feel better once I get started.”

  “I’m sure you will. It’s the unknown that has you unsettled. After a few weeks you’ll have more confidence.”

  “I hope so. Right now I just want to get to Monday.”

  “Why don’t we see if Colleen and the boys would like to go with our group to the park on Sunday? They love flying kites and I like helping them. I’m sure John and Ben would, too.”

  “The boys would love it. I’ll talk to Colleen about it.”

  “Good. How are they doing?”

  “I stopped by on my way home today and they’re doing fine. They’re settling in and really looking forward to making new friends, and Colleen and Ida are just ready to get the day care started.”

  “Much like you wanting to get started in your new position?”

  “Exactly.” She chuckled. “Now that you mention it, I think we’re all a little nervous and excited all at the same time. Kind of silly, I suppose.”

  The tinkling sound of her laughter lightened Luke’s heart. His admiration for her grew even more that she could laugh at herself after all she’d been through.

  “Not at all. I think everyone is a bit nervous when they’re faced a major change in their lives.”

  “You’re not just trying to make me feel better?”

  “No. I know what it’s like to start over. It is difficult, but it gets easier with time.”

  Or it did—until memories surfaced and brought back all the pain of losing a loved one and reminded him why he’d decided never to fall in love again.

  They arrived back at Heaton House to find that the new boarder had arrived.

  “Kathleen, Luke, come meet Matthew Sterling, our new boarder,” Mrs. Heaton said.

  They entered the parlor to see a man who appeared to be about Luke’s age. But he was a little taller, had almost black hair and blue eyes and was quite tan, as if he worked outside most of the time.

  “Matt is the son of one of my childhood friends from Virginia. He’s an iron worker come to help finish up the American Surety Company Building and then he’ll be helping build the Park Row Building starting in October.”

  Luke strode across the room and held out his hand. “A pleasure to meet you, Mr.—”

  “Oh, please call me Matt. Mrs. Heaton has assured me everyone goes by their first name here.”

  “All right, Matt. I’m Luke Patterson—just Luke is fine. Welcome to Heaton House. It’s always good to have another man in the mix here.”

 
“And this is Kathleen O’Bryan,” Mrs. Heaton said as she pulled Kathleen forward. “She’s been our newest boarder until you came.”

  “How do you do...Kathleen?”

  “It’s nice to meet you, Mr.—ah, Matt. You’ll find Heaton House is truly a home, just as the rest of us have.”

  “I’m already feeling at home here, thank you.”

  “I’ve heard the Park Row is going to be one of the tallest buildings in the city,” Luke said. “How is it working so high up?”

  “Well, I’ve worked on some tall ones and I love it. But this one is going to be 391 feet. I think it will be the tallest once it’s finished. I can’t wait to get to work on it.”

  “Oh, it sounds very dangerous,” Kathleen said.

  Matt shrugged and grinned at her. “It can be. But we’re careful up there.”

  “Luke, I’ve given him Michael’s old room, of course, but he hasn’t had time to get his things downstairs. Everyone had gone to their room when Matt arrived. Would you mind?”

  “I’ll be glad to help him get settled. Whenever you’re ready, Matt.” And the sooner the better. Luke could see the interest in the other man’s eyes as he looked at Kathleen and he didn’t like it at all.

  Matt turned his attention to Luke. “I’m ready now. I’ve got to report in early tomorrow. I didn’t bring a lot.” He motioned to the two cases on the floor at his feet.

  Luke grabbed one of the cases. “Follow me.” He barely looked back as he said, “Night, Kathleen, Mrs. Heaton. See you in the morning.”

  “Good night, Luke. Thank you for showing me Gramercy Park. I enjoyed it very much.”

  “So did I. We’ll have to do it again.”

  “See you both in the morning,” Mrs. Heaton said.

  Matt followed Luke out the door, down the hall and then down the stairs.

  Even though he had no claim on Kathleen—and was determined not to—Luke didn’t mind if this new boarder thought he might. Mrs. Heaton might have known the man’s mother a long time ago, but none of them knew the man.