Hope Falls_Passing Through

by Frances Elliot

  “I know, but just the same.” He rose, slipped one arm beneath her knees, the other around her back and lifted her; she put her arms around his neck and smiled up at him.

  “All right, but no one would stop and try to look—” She stopped and her eyes widened. “David,” they said simultaneously.

  He put her back on her feet and she raked her hair back from her face. “How long have we been here?” she asked.

  Two hours? Two minutes? He had no idea. “Wouldn’t he call?”

  “Oh. Of course,” she said, relieved. She reached for him, then froze. She put her fingertips to her forehead and sighed. “I left my phone on the bar.”

  “There’s a land line, right?”

  She looked hopeful for only a moment. “I doubt he remembers the number. I certainly don’t.”

  Okay, he thought. Change of plan. He shook himself like a wet dog, leant over to pick up her skirt and held it out. “Put this back on so I have a fighting chance of controlling myself. Where shall we go? My hotel?”

  Ignoring the skirt, she turned to cross to one of the desks and he groaned aloud as he took in this different view. He came up behind her as she dialed, snaked his arms around her waist and pressed his erection against her just as she said “Hey, David, we—”

  She caught her breath and tried to squirm away but he held her firmly. A deep, almost convulsive shudder ran through her body, then to his surprise, she abruptly leaned over, put her elbows on the desk and pressed back into him.

  “Yes, I know,” she said into the phone, rubbing that perfect ass against his cock. “I know. We’re not coming back, we changed our … we’re going home. Stop talking David, just listen. You have to stay at Cathy’s tonight. Seriously. I mean it, David, I’ll kill you if you come home, goodbye.”

  She dropped the receiver in the general direction of its cradle but missed. The thought that this was a dangerous game they were playing flitted across his mind, then vanished. Suddenly overcome by the frenzy he’d expected earlier, he could now think of nothing but ripping those panties off and getting his fly down.

  As he shifted his hands, she flattened her torso on the desk and laid her head on her outstretched arms, face turned to the side. Her eyes looked unfocused; her lips were moving as she tried but failed to say something. She wet her lips and tried again. “Never mind,” she managed to whisper. He had never even imagined wanting a woman this much, he thought, and yanked her panties down.

  The phone, inches from her ear, set up the piercing beepbeepbeep of an off-the-hook receiver and she tried to jerk upright, knocking the back of her head into his chin. A jolt of pain shot though him and he automatically stepped back, freeing her. She stood and turned into his arms, looking up with concern. “Are you … did I …” She started to laugh.

  Another moment he would never, ever forget, he thought. He dropped into the handy desk chair, looked up at her, and then covered his eyes. “Please. I am begging you. Put your skirt back on. I am staying in precisely this position until you give me an all clear.”

  ***

  How evenly matched they were, thought Alice. There would be many disagreements in the future, many skirmishes, but in the end, the result would usually be a draw. There had been moments she’d felt something close to fear as she recognized his power over her, but in this very short time they’d been alone together her confidence in her own power had grown.

  She laughed again and he moved the hand he’d been holding over his eyes and looked at her, puzzled. “Nothing,” she said, shaking her head. “I’m just happy.”

  “I believe I asked you to get dressed, Miss Spencer. Am I wrong?”

  She thought of how much fun it would be to straddle him in that chair, put her arms around his neck and kiss him again, then … As if he were reading her mind, he narrowed his eyes and spun around to face the desk. “While you button your blouse, and put your skirt back on, I am going to occupy myself by taking a quick look at … oh, good lord.”

  Not terribly surprised, she watched as he swiveled to face her again, gesturing back at the office computer. “You’re aware, I hope, that this is the equivalent of a Model T.”

  For a moment she was surprised by his sudden mood change -- all that lust so quickly displaced by amusement. Then she saw his eyes drift down over her body, lingering here and there before moving back to her face. He started to rise, quickly changed his mind and spun around again. “I haven’t seen one of these since I was in school.”

  “We like to think of it as a ‘classic,’” she said.

  “I suppose that’s one way of looking at it,” he said, his fingers moving over the keyboard. “Maybe a little over-optimistic, but I happen to love women who look at the bright side.”

  Now he was concentrated and focused, peering at the monitor and Alice felt an interesting tingle beginning to move through her body again. Fact was, she found men who loved their work irresistibly sexy – she imagined all that intensity and passion directed at her.

  She retrieved her skirt and put it on, but left her blouse unbuttoned. Standing behind his chair, she leant over, slipped her arms around his neck and put her face close to his. There was something about his scent that was driving her crazy; she kissed him at the side of his neck, trying to determine its source. “Alice,” he said in a warning tone.

  “Yes, Ryan,” she replied, all innocence.

  “I am considering,” he said, still staring at the screen, “I am considering tying you to that other chair for the two or three minutes it will take me to finish this. Do you want me to do that?”

  The answer was a definite yes, thought Alice, a jolt of desire running through her. But she straightened up and began to button her blouse. Watching the flashing changes on the screen as his fingers flew over the keyboard, she said, “Did you find the thing that wasn’t working, I mean, do you know anything about it?”

  Without pausing from his work, he said, sounding slightly distracted, “I wrote it.”

  “What?”

  He didn’t respond, just tapped a few more keys before spinning around to face her. The way he smiled when he looked at her made her feel warm, safe, and beautiful. He stood, putting his arms around her waist. “You are the most beautiful woman I’ve ever laid eyes on. How nice it will be to get to know you.” His smile broadened and his eyes flashed. “After I fuck you, of course. Can we get the hell out of here now?”

  ***

  The conversation on the ride back to her place felt natural and easy-going, but at the same time, Ryan was choosing his words carefully. What he wanted to say was “I totally messed up my life and I had no idea what I was doing and then I met you and now everything seems wonderful and I know I’m going to be okay.” Way too weird – she’d think he expected her to save him. He knew this was the woman he’d been waiting for and he didn’t want to blow it now.

  He kept glancing over to her, checking her reactions, and gradually he relaxed, reassured by her interest and understanding. As he spoke, and as she asked questions, he found he was explaining things to himself, too. “I loved it at first – software can be so clean, so elegant. I love making complicated things seem simple. It seemed perfect for me, a math nerd who needed to make some money.”

  “What went wrong?”

  They drove a few blocks in silence and he was pleased she didn’t seem to expect a quick, easy answer. “I wish I could figure that out. Too much pressure, too much competition, too little control. Too much money. I didn’t handle any of it very well.”

  “Oh. Do you have a lot of money?” She sounded surprised.

  Funny how self-conscious he still felt about that. “Yeah,” he said, “kind of. I gave a lot away.”

  “Not all it’s cracked up to be?” she asked.

  “Well, to be honest – yes and no. It isn’t horrible,” he laughed. “But after a while I couldn’t think of anything else I wanted. And it turned me into sort of an asshole.”

  Again, he was happy she didn’t jump in right away
with something like “Oh, I’m sure that’s not true.” Matter of fact, he thought, she seemed to grasp instinctively his asshole potential. He thought for a moment. “What did you think I did? Did you have a guess?”

  She looked thoughtful. “I guess I left that pretty hazy. Something like artist, musician. I’m pretty surprised by math whiz.”

  He looked over sharply and was relieved to see her smiling. “Or chef,” she added, still smiling. “For some reason I thought you might be one of those crazy perfectionist chefs. In a way, that’s a little closer, isn’t it?”

  He didn’t answer. He pulled up to a stop sign and turned to her. “You know those movies where the wonderful teacher comes in and all the apathetic kids get real excited about the subject and turn into over-achievers?”

  “I love those movies.”

  “I want to do that,” he said, astonishing himself. He drove on, thinking, for a block or so. “I can’t believe I said that. I’ve never even thought about it before.”

  “I think it’s a terrific idea. Oh, turn left at—“

  “I know,” he said automatically, making the turn. Oh, damn, he thought. Hoping she wouldn’t think that over too long, he opened his mouth and began “Do you …” but she cut him off.

  “When?” was all she said.

  For a half second he considered saying ‘when what?’ but knew sounding evasive would make matters worse. “Saturday night. I saw you at that gas station and … Are you creeped out?”

  She sat staring straight ahead and when he glanced over he saw she was grinning. “I was out looking for you,” she said.

  “No shit?”

  “No shit.”

  They pulled into her driveway and he switched off the ignition. They sat quietly, Ryan feeling a soaring elation he’d never felt before. And then, an instant deflation. “Alice,” he said with a groan. “We didn’t stop at a drugstore.”

  Wearily, he reached for the key but she flung the door open and ran towards the house. She reappeared moments later on the front porch, gleefully waving a condom and calling out triumphantly “Laundry room! David forgets to empty his pockets!”

  Lord, I hope the neighbors aren’t watching, he thought as he got out of the car. He hustled up the steps, put an arm around her shoulders and walked her inside. As soon as the door closed she pressed against him but he turned her to slide the jacket off. She leaned back into him and he covered her breasts with his hands. “Alice,” he said, his lips touching her ear, “is there only one?”

  She lifted her other hand and opened the fist, displaying four or five wrapped packets. “Good,” he murmured, nipping gently at her earlobe. “Because I have a plan I’d like to run by you.”

  Chapter Seven – Monday Night

  The first part of the “plan” had been precisely what Alice wanted. Explaining that their start-stop-start approach had left him in dire condition, he had asked quite politely if she would mind bending over that piece of furniture against the wall. Now. She complied; her skirt was lifted; her panties lowered, and as he entered her, she wondered briefly if they’d remembered to close the door. Not important, she thought.

  At some point the tight grip of his hands on her hips had loosened and the short, hard thrusts had slowed. She’d felt him stretch out along her back and reach to move some of the hair away from her face. The hand slid down her side to her leg, then crept around to the very top of her inner thigh. His fingers began to lightly stroke her there and she moaned.

  After only a few seconds, she heard herself whisper “please” and he’d responded instantly, brushing one of his fingers across her sex. But only once. She’d squirmed against his hips, moaning again, and he’d relented, slowly sliding his fingers around and into the creases of the inner lips.

  There was something insinuating about his touch, something knowing, that made her feel almost helpless. As if they’d done this many, many times before and he already knew her, knew her body and its responses.

  With a high-pitched, whistling sound she’d never made before, she came, jerking against the wooden surface beneath her. She heard Ryan groan and she raised and twisted her head, trying to see his face.

  His head was thrown back, his jaw clenched, and she felt his hands tighten around her hips as he exploded inside her. She rested her head on her arms again and stared into her suddenly unfamiliar living room with the odd sensation that nothing would ever again look quite the same. Then he bent from the waist to kiss her cheek and Alice sighed, loving the feel of his reassuring weight along her back. He cleared his throat, said “I …” then stopped, and straightened up.

  Her breathing was returning to normal, but she was still trembling as he lifted her onto her feet and gathered her into his arms. For only a moment, he stared into her face and she suspected she was seeing an expression that mirrored her own – wonder and fear in equal parts.

  He smiled a bit and kissed her gently. “And now,” he said quietly, his lips moving against hers, “now we will start all over. I intend to delight you with my considerate, gentlemanly seduction technique.” Suddenly briskly efficient, he had dropped his arms and stepped away.

  It was amazing how well the plan had worked – too well, in fact. She’d watched him zip up and felt a new surge of lust that almost propelled her forward into his arms again, but she had resisted. She’d made a few ineffective attempts at reassembling herself, and then given up, feeling hopelessly awkward and confused. Without a word, she turned and ran upstairs to the refuge of her room. With the door closed behind her, she took a few deep breaths.

  Tossing her skirt and blouse onto the bed, she began her after-work routine on autopilot – put hair in ponytail, wash up, put on sweats. But as she crossed the room her knees began to shake and she sat down hastily. Overwhelmed with something close to panic, wearing only her underwear, she perched on the edge of the chair where she’d planned, hoped and dreamed since childhood. She thought her teeth might start chattering.

  What if … what if … What? What if it turns out I don’t love him, she thought. What if he’s just a cute guy and a good lay and that’s all there is to it? By her current standards, she was already ahead in the game – what’s with all this, this, dread? So what if this whole thing turned out to be nothing so terribly special? No big deal. All she had to do was … She gasped.

  All she had to do was learn to mistrust every thought, feeling and emotion that guided her. Ignore what her heart told her, forget something she’d been told all her life – you’ll just know. She squared her shoulders, rose, and pulled on a t-shirt and a pair of soft leggings. Well, nothing for it now but to see it through. I’m either the luckiest girl in the world or the victim of temporary insanity, she thought, and headed downstairs.

  ***

  Ryan had been pacing. And thinking. Sitting down, then bouncing out of every chair he passed. What the hell have I done? When is she coming back? Is she coming back? Maybe she wants me to disappear; maybe I should just get in the car and drive away. He’d had hook-ups, what had those women wanted?

  He couldn’t seem to think straight, couldn’t seem to recall even one previous sexual experience. But this one … Hit with a sudden flood of memories, he felt the first stirrings of another erection.

  Yeah, that sex, that body. He stared out the front window without seeing a thing. That had been … that had been … like coming home, he thought. And yes! He’d managed to wait for her; he should get a medal for that. He felt his chest expanding with manly pride. He really was an excellent … okay, then why had she run away, big shot? He sat down again.

  Nice chair, he thought, best TV angle, wonder who sits in it? Where will I sit when I’m … what are you doing, man? She wants you to leave. You are such an idiot; you don’t just pick up women like that and fuck them in the front hall, what were you thinking? You weren’t thinking at all, dickhead, as per usual. Just go call goodbye and get out before she calls someone to come over here and beat you up. He heard her footsteps on the stairs.
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br />   She paused briefly on the bottom step, smiled a little and started walking towards him. Prom date, he thought. I’m standing here gaping like a kid picking up his prom date. But this was the opposite transformation – she’d changed from beautiful, competent-appearing woman to soft, cozy girl and he found himself hoping those pants were easy to peel off.

  Stopping about a yard away as if wary, she lifted an arm in a stiff game-show hostess gesture and said, “Um, would you like to look around?” She dropped the arm, opened her mouth, closed it again and finally said, “This is the living room.”

  Had she taken off her bra? Probably not, her breasts were still so … up there, but he thought he could see a nipple outline. There was faded writing on the shirt that obscured his view. “Sorry, what?”

  Looking strangely desperate, she said, “Would you like something to drink?”

  If he concentrated he could think of an answer to that, he was pretty sure. “Okay.”

  A short hall led back to a big, old-fashioned kitchen and Ryan tried to keep his eyes off her ass as he followed her. He sank gratefully into a seat beside the large pine table and watched her open the refrigerator. She leaned in to scan the shelves and the fabric tightened across that perfectly shaped butt. “There’s beer and Coke and I think we might have a bottle of wine somewhere,” she said, turning to him.

  What had she said? He shifted in his chair. “That sounds great.”

  “What? What does?”

  Wow. Adorable. I don’t want to keep behaving like a fool, but I sure hope I get to see that puzzled look again, he thought. “Oh. Whatever you’d like.”

  With a slightly concerned look in his direction, as though she suspected he might have been smoking weed or something in her absence, she pulled out two bottles of beer and popped the caps on a wall-mounted opener. She sat across from him and lifted her bottle. “Well, here’s to … well, here’s, uh, whatever,” she said and half-rose to clink. They each took a swig, put the bottles back on the table and looked at each other.